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Only a monster wouldn't cry every 5 seconds.Nancy Pelosi did an interview with Sunday’s The New York Times Magazine in which she let America know that she was not put on the cover of a different, money-hemorrhaging magazine (Time) when she became House speaker. But John Boehner was on the front of that magazine recently, promoting his new role as the star of The Cat in the Hat 2, because he is a MAN. Nancy Pelosi does not like this, even though she says she doesn’t care, so she took the time to tell everyone John Boehner is a big crybaby who weeps over things that don’t matter (like getting a new job title), whereas she barely ever cries because her entire body is made out of testicles.

You know what? He is known to cry. He cries sometimes when we’re having a debate on bills. If I cry, it’s about the personal loss of a friend or something like that. But when it comes to politics — no, I don’t cry. I would never think of crying about any loss of an office, because that’s always a possibility, and if you’re professional, then you deal with it professionally. […]

I have deep emotions about the American people. If I were to cry for anything, I would cry for them and the policies that they’re about to face.

You know who did cry when he lost an office? John Boehner. God forbid something should happen to Obama or Biden, because if this man becomes president, we will have to hold his hand every time somebody refers to him as “Mr. President” or plays “Hail to the Chief” or salutes him. [NYT via Wonkette operative “J C”]

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