Conservatives Spending Hours Voting For Bristol Palin To Get Back At ACORN

Sarah Palin fans on the Internet are pretty much spending all their free time these days doing one thing:  making sure Bristol Palin stays on her dancing teevee show and is not fired or executed or given a poison tulip or whatever. These people are actual, middle-aged adults in the primes of their lives, and they have decided to take advantage of their power, in the waning years of their time on Earth, to spend hours every day voting for Bristol on ABC's website -- even if some of them don't think she is good at doing the dances people have her do in the magic picture box. Why do they do this? To get back at ACORN and the Democrats, of course, for violating the principle of "one person, one vote." Oh, and she is now considered a new Jesus Christ, apparently.

Here's a hint: They don't have to be VALID email addresses to register them with ABC.com, there is apparently no validation process. The just have to be formatted like a valid email address, and you must use a valid zip code and a birthdate that makes you old enough to vote. I'm voting like a democrat, all night long…

You see, conservatives don't know how to jigger the AOL to get the Gateway to enter in e-mail addresses over and over, many times a minute, but they can force those arthritis hands to hunt-and-peck about 40 votes for Bristol per hour. This is referred to in the business world as "productivity."

[T]he fact we've been all doing this for Bristol has been driving the Left NUTS…For conservatives, enjoy the fun of finally, at last, getting a taste of what it's like to be a Democrat. You can vote as much as you want. You can vote using all sorts of names. You can vote all day. You can't get paid to vote, because you aren't really a Democrat, silly, but you can get as close as you can possibly get without being in a union or taking part in ACORN.

NUTS! This dancing teevee show stuff is really bothering Obama and Pelosi and Reid and the whole crew, because the entire country watches this dumb, boring show -- just like each and every member of the scooter set. Bristol is literally dancing away the socialism.

Bristol is also now Jesus, or someone who grinds on Jesus, as here is a dance she did that apparently had something to do with the movie Passion of the Christ :

And this is not blasphemy? Okay.

But according to someone at Free Republic, this is no place for young Bristol:

I will not vote for that tacky bit of TV trash. She should be home taking care of the baby and trying to find a good husband.

It's what we're all thinking. [ Jezebel ]