Sarah Palin has won victory in her epic war against a random college student who guessed her high school was “Wasilla” and thus gained access to her Yahoo! e-mail. Sure, this really had no effect on the 2008 campaign except to confirm this woman used a Yahoo! account, either sinisterly or stupidly, to conduct state business. But because this guy posted photos of a few of her e-mails on 4chan, and Sarah Palin put a stupid password hint on her account that any toddler could easily figure out, he is now going to prison for a year. This is what happens when you find and allow the world to make fun of Sarah Palin’s poor use of the English language in the dumb private messages she sends out.
U.S. District Judge Thomas W. Phillips also said David Kernell, 22, should get mental health treatment, based on defense comments Friday that he has had conditions including depression since he was 11. [...]
“I am not going to make any kind of excuses,” he said. “I’d like to apologize to the Palin family.”
Oh, buck up. You didn’t violate Sarah Palin’s “privacy.” That’s a thing that doesn’t exist for that family except when Palin decides she should whine about it to show her followers much of a “liberal media victim” she is.
And Team Sarah, with the inevitable response:
They like cute college boys in jail.
And apparently so does Team Sarah commenter Hyman Roth, who called this college kid “cute.” [AP/Team Sarah]
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As someone pointed out elsewhere – he'll be doing more time than Scooter Libby.
Steal a little and they throw you in jail…steal a lot and they make you king…
And he'll be doing more time than Dick "War Criminal" Cheney, who should spend the rest of his goddamn animatronic days in a dark hole.
And Dubya made the unbelievably difficult decision to commute Libby's sentence. Our great ex-leader struggled against all odds to go against Cheney and not pardon him. Almost as difficult as the Kanye "situation". What bravery.
Break into a Senators office to bug it – probation.
Hack into some illiterate quitter's email account – one year in jail.
The message here is take responsibility for your actions, but only if you aren't a Republican jackass.
Obama should make this his first pardon. Let's get a petition for this.
That would be delicious torture for her mouth-breathing followers. I'm in.
Should we create a Facebook page?
I would do it, but I am not sure how to set up a petition on the site.
Maybe he will get sent to a halfway house, it's still outrageous.
One small problem with this idea. Obama listens to Republicans far more than he listens to sane, compassionate liberals. It will never happen, but where do I sign anyway.
Obama will compromise and have him executed.
I used to feel bad for the kid, but not now that he's apologized to Palin, which is simply unforgivable.
She had him waterboarded.
It's the victim's job to apologize; did you not get the memo?
Will college kid have the option of army instead of jail? I wouldn't advise that route, but isn't that the rumor of why Track decided to join up?
Cute? Yeah sure. This kid cost the GOP the 2008 election. So this conviction has got to be good news for John McCain.
Yeah, John McCain should totally demand a do-over. It's only fair. Maybe this time he can choose someone not insane for his running mate.
But John proved himself a total whore in this past midterm and whores don't get do overs. They take the money off the night stand and move on to the next trick.
And yet James O'Keefe continues to walk free.
He was just a boy pulling a little prank, but this guy was a serious criminal; the fact that O'Keefe's father is a US attorney has nothing to do with dissimilarities in their treatment.
Hate to be all exacting, but it was the father of one of O'Keefe's buddies in that caper who was a US attorney in New Orleans, not O'Keefe's own daddy.
Jimmy is a "Gern-ah-list", don't you get that?
TeamSarah doesn't have the responsibility of being as diplomatic and gracious as Sarah Palin does — say, as evidenced by her recent tweets.
They should all be horsewhipped.
This is Wonkette, sir or madam. The proper spelling is "chiliwhipped".
GET ME MY HORSE!!
Why did he hack into her email again? I mean she gives us all her brain farts for free every stinking day.
And are you sure the judge wasn't talking about the failed VP candidate's supporters with his mental health treatment comment.
Free Kernell!
I object to this being called a hack. He guessed her passwords/security question. Taking advantage of the retarded, yes; hacking, no.
Presume her password was "password"?
That guy got what he deserved! I hope they toss him the same prison they put all those dangerous criminals who got caught smoking marijuana!
He's lucky, he gets to get away from her for a year.
I'm surprised she remembered the answer to her security question: "Where did you meet your husband?"
Truck stop restroom?
Moose Lodge?
The annual "Put the Aging Iditarod Dogs out of Their Misery" Shoot-a-thon?
Snowmobile/bondage chat room?
At college.
Or at the other college… or was it that different college… or…
Behind me?
Didn't that BART cop get two years for murdering a guy who was lying on the ground, unarmed? What the fuck.
Jesus. Yep. Oh, and they're at it again.
But sure, I often confuse scales for guns. It causes much embarrassment at the shooting range when I show up with my postage meter instead of my glock.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/...
Yeah, well, this provides us a glimpse of the kinds of "crimes" for which people will be thrown in prison under the Palin regime.
You're right! They're gonna riot in Wasilla over this one!
I just re-read the original article. He "guessed" her zip code, birthdate and that she met the Toddster in Wasilla? Really? If I'm the judge I'm fining this kid for invasion of privacy and telling the bailiff to administer a kick in the ass for posting Sarah's drivel on the internets. Then I'm whacking Snowbilly with a copy of "Internet Security for Dumb-Asses".
I'm guessing "Hyman" Roth is not Bristol.
ahahahahaha… hyman.
Sarah wouldn't let it go because this kid's paying the price for Levi Johnson's crimes.
Which are, what? Getting Sarah pregnant the fifth time?
Sarah wouldn't let it go because she's an insane person.
Their grudges go on forever, regardless of reality.
I'll admit it – he was guilty of the crime of assuming that Palin's private life might offer something more embarrassing than her public one.
The way things are going, I'm guessing this isn't the last person Palin will throw in prison.
This is f*cked up. Poor kid. It's not like he invaded a country on false pretenses or something.
Or even fired a chief law enforcement officer for refusing to abuse his office for illegal revenge against a former family member.
Should have said he was looking for weapons of mass destruction, would have been OK.
Actually, I'm now wondering if maybe the judge's decision was triggered by fear of being literally torn apart by a pack of raving Palin-worshiping madmen.
Now, now, now. Some judges would have looked forward to that.
Interesting how Palin is always whining about her privacy, and yet she invites a TLC film crew in to film her under-age children for her new "reality" show.
Sure, because the only acceptable punishment for someone who embarrasses Sarah Palin is a year of anal rape.
In that spirit, may every non-ironic member of Team Sarah be anally raped repeatedly by Polar Bears with giant cat dicks. And I mean that.
"The only acceptable punishment for someone who embarrasses Sarah Palin is a year of anal rape."
And Sarah's comments that are a continual embarrassment mean what?!?!?
more anal rape.
A year? I think he should serve 25 weeks and just announce that he QUITS.
Yea cuz only dead fish go with the flow dontcha know. WTF?
It looks like the Federal Bureau of Prisons can send him to some sort of halfway house if they choose. Be interesting to see how that works out.
I'll bet someone, anyone, $5 whole dollars, that the Muslim cab driver stabber gets a similar sentence.
Mark my words.
This raises my hate level of Palin to new high. I didn’t think that was possible.
You’re an inspiration for Christians everywhere bitch.
A halfway house? In Tennessee? Poor kid.
Palin is apparently comparing this to Watergate. Why not just compare it to the Crucifixion while she's at it.
And the Holocaust. No, make it World War II, or the Big Bang. This is huge!
Geez, people. Don't encourage her.
because Jesus got off in three days, according to her.
also, he didn't die. even though he did. or something.
She's got the trigmata to prove it.
“I am not going to make any kind of excuses,”
obviously this kid learned nothing reading Palin's business. See the victim. Be the victim.
So this kid finds that a sitting governor is using a Yahoo account to conduct official government business, sidestepping state record-keeping and open government laws, and he's the one thrown in jail?
God bless America!
The votes are not so much uninformed as not caring how shitty her dancing is, just about her last name.
What court gives you a year for this? We are a fucked up country.
Seriously? A Governor uses Yahoo for her e-mail account. The wrong person was on trial and having their sanity questioned.
Too bad the judge can't sentence c4pee-ers to a halfway house. Put 'em all together in one place and let them fight to the death to see who lurves Sister the most.
if i could harness the hate i have for that woman and turn it into energy, i could power more homes than the energy i'm currently harnessing from my love of sexin' up ladies.
Well, by this standard, this little intellectual property pecadillo here should cost me about 5 years, but dammit, its fucking appropriate, only Leonard Cohen is working for me now, I'm at stage 4, gin no longer working, gotta be something that'll take away the edge,
Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
Everybody knows that the war is over
Everybody knows the good guys lost
Everybody knows the fight was fixed
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
That's how it goes
Everybody knows
Everybody knows that the boat is leaking
Everybody knows that the captain lied
Everybody got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died
Very nice. American/Canadian Jewish/Christian bi/straight/gay poet/songwriter/novelist* Leonard Cohen always welcome to me.
Everybody's talkin to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long-stem rose…&etc
A little vermouth and a cocktail olive will improve that gin.
————————
*DO NOT read Beautiful Losers unless you want your 21-year-old supposed sophistication seriously undermined. Particularly the part with the rubber sheet.
I read that long ago ( and no I do not want to say how long ago).
All I remember is Ray Charles at the end. I never heard Ray talk about that, surely a commenter here can enlighten me. (Haven't thought about this in years and AGAIN, I do not want to say how many years).
Off with your head, prommie.
What is it about the Palin family and failing to use protection?
Did Sarah Palin or her representatives actually make that disgusting prison rape joke "They like cute college boys in jail."???
That's disgusting, even for her.
Free David Kernell
Free free
Free free free David Kernell
Free David Kernell
2 years in captivity
Shoes too small to fit his feet
His body abused, but his mind is still free
You're so blind that you cannot see
Free David Kernell
Visited the causes at the Yahoo mail
Only one man in a made up jail
You're so blind that you cannot see
You're so deaf that you cannot hear him
Free David Kernell
2 tears in captivity
You're so blind that you cannot see
You're so deaf that you cannot hear him
You're so dumb that you cannot speak
Free David Kernell
I know this has been beaten to death as much as Rod Jetton's girlfriend, but why are Republicans so strangely obsessed with homosexual sex? You'd think, with as much of it as they have, they'd be a little more used to it.
I'm married. I can never have sex again.
Oooh getting laid by the guy who hacked Snowbilly. That might work if he wasn't doing time. Once a guy goes to prison I cross him off my list.
elitist.
I got this weird little "mom" rush after reading about this kid. Yeah, he fucked up. There is something inside of me that makes me want to make sure that he gets a few books or something while he is in jail, yet I don't want him to get the impression that he can fuck up and get treats and presents for it.
Yeah, I'd adopt the kid and make a website about it and show it to Sarah if it would piss her off. I would have the body cavity search and go to see him and show him pictures of the little pony my husband and I bought for him when he gets out.
Is this the kick-off to the Holiday season? Well if so, Merry Fucking Xmas everybody.
When does Palin's new stupid book come out? I'll guess it sucks. Throw me in jail because I "guessed" right.
HEY, this is AMERICA!! Little people getting squashed like bugs is how things work, And don't you forget it, little person. If you get my drift.
In case anybody is wondering, her mom's maiden name is Sheeran and her favorite sports team is probably the Wasilla High Warriors. I do not know the names of her first grade teacher or favorite pet.
I'm guessing the pet is some sort of venomous reptile.
Which year of first grade?
All of them.
WIN.
All of them, indeed.
Favorite pet = dinner. Dummy.
This is some bullshit, and the worst part is that, unlike a real hacker, he won't be getting a job offer from the gubbermint when he gets out.
Climate Scientists' emails showing no wrongdoing: fair game & thank god for putin's aetheist kgb oil hackers
Conservative's account used illegally for public business: throw away the key and sodomize him.
Sodomy: don't get us wrong we're still vehemently against it. The childruns!
I guess it's the pigs with lipstick that more equal then others.
Sarah looks cute in that picture with her little monster child. Wow! He's growing. How big will he get?
" How big will he get?" I'm guessin' he'll get big enuff to get SS benefits for the rest of his life. Is that a good guess?
Hyman Roth? He woke up one morning, learned that Sarah's privacy had been violated, but he let it go. Saying, "This is the business we have chosen."
Lee S. in The Godfather is a big, fat rebuke to all those pinheads who endlessly repeat "those who can…etc". And, no, I'm not a teacher. And my wife isn't a teacher.
Let me guess. I'll say the Palin gal's new password is "cuntzrule69".
Now that's just mean.
Thank you.
Palin's ATM PIN is 1234. Pass it on…
damn i'm glad we have this ugly incident behind us as a country.
go USA!! go US…
yeah, no.
i am very sad for us now.
Typical Palin hypocrisy. She favors having the government be able to read private citizens' emails without warrants but thinks her own emails should be off limits even if they relate to using her positions of power to vindictively persecute those who oppose her. LionelHutzEsq noted James O'Keefe went free for something worse. I would point out that Richard Armitage and Ronert Novak have been allowed to go scot-free despite outing undercover CIA agent Valerie Plame Wilson AND the CIA front company she was working with, endangering numerous agents working on nuclear anti-proliferation.
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