Add to Flipboard Magazine.

Somebody maybe found a bomb (a 45-cent crate-opening pocket tool) on an airliner, and now the plane has landed, in Oregon. There was a note, too! (Maybe threatening?) Combined with the UPS/FedEx/Cast Away horror of last week and something mailed to Germany from Greece, we are going to need to anally prod a lot more toddlers with “stun guns” at TSA checkpoints everywhere, immediately:

A passenger plane has landed in Portland, Ore., after an onboard threat involving suspicious items was reported.

An official told CBS News there was a report of a threatening note and box cutters on board Delta Flight 90, a regularly-scheduled flight from Narita Airport in Tokyo.

Previous articleDrop Off Your Ballot and Pick Up a Delicious American Anus Burger
Next articleABC Won't Have Andrew Breitbart's Expert Poop-Leech Analysis Tonight