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Ronald McDonald for Speaker of the House!There’s no better salve for the empty feeling you get after casting your ballot than the gooey greasy salt-fat blob of a delicious anus burger sliding down your throat to rest in your gut alongside the “beef tallow” sodium stick fries and 72 ounces of corn syrup you just consumed as an appetizer. You might not be able to “change Washington” or whatever, but you can spend your change at the McDonaldland! Thanks to “David F.J.” for the terrible map screenshot.

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