- Meg Whitman has finally realized that she can’t buy the Governorship of California on eBay — which really sucks for her, because she has already spent hundreds of millions of her own dollars trying to do exactly that! So on to Plan B: Deport her former housekeeper, the Illegal Mexican Nicky Diaz Santillan! It “breaks her heart,” but Meg Whitman knows that this will solve California’s deficit. Oh and then Meg started barfing about how she wants a “stronger electronic verification system for employers,” because that evil Nicky Diaz Santillan had “a valid California driver’s license” and a “Social Security card,” both of which were probably birthday presents from Jerry Brown. Or maybe they were forged? Is Nicky Diaz Santillan a harmless housekeeper, or a member of the Mexican CIA? Doesn’t matter, deport her! (Jerry Brown supporters should also probably be deported.) It breaks Meg Whitman’s heart, but she really really wants to be elected. [LAT]
- Joe Miller has accused Lisa Murkowski of lying — lying! Ha ha, just four more days, people. Four more days. [McClatchy]
- “A judge has ruled that a young girl accused of running down an elderly woman while racing a bicycle with training wheels on a Manhattan sidewalk two years ago can be sued for negligence.” When will little girls realize there are no “training wheels” for Negligence? Sue this toddler and take all her Crazy Bandz and Tamagotchis. [NYT]
July 22, 2014
Teary-Eyed Meg Whitman Would Gladly Deport Former Housekeeper
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