COCKTOBER SURPRISIER  8:20 pm October 28, 2010

What Did Gawker Leave Out of Their Christine O’Donnell Pubic-Hair Story?

by Jack Stuef

At least this woman will have enough of a campaign war chest to run for Senate for a living the rest of her life.As we all know, some bro’s account of what Christine O’Donnell’s pubic hair looks like shows she is hypocritical on the most important political issues, and that is why Gawker, according to them, posted that gross account of her naked body on the Internet, for which they paid thousands of dollars. (Haha, you have already clicked on the jump to this story because we put up that picture of her and are talking about her sex life. WE GET IT, THIS IS OUR THING TOO A LOT. Thank you, Gawker.) So yes, the “hypocritical” thing is one way Gawker has been defending this. Another: “We did have to make some judgements,” editor Remy Stern said. “There was some salacious stuff that we didn’t put in.” Really? We have some guesses as to what that stuff is!

Here is a list of important details Gawker left out of this story they purchased because they were slightly less political than that pubic-hair thing we didn’t need to read on a weak stomach:

  • Obviously something to do with a dildo, a really special kind of dildo, because political dildo stuff has died down since your afternoon editor declared this month “Dildoctober.”
  • Precise measurements of Christine O’Donnell’s breasts and vagina.
  • Photos of a 1:1 scale model of this vagina, along with blueprints for making a replica of our own.
  • Oh, ass stuff too. Democracy always needs an accurate rectal measurement.
  • A detailed history of any and all objects that have entered this candidate’s orifices in her life.
  • A sciency pH test and complete analysis on the makeup of her vaginal fluid.
  • Full accounts of each mortifying event in the history of the universe that has involved this particular vagina.
  • An expert analyst’s photo of what Christine O’Donnell’s naked body looked like at its objectively ugliest moment.
  • A short analysis on why this woman is way behind in the polls and still has no chance of winning.



On a serious note, can we please let this condemnation be a teachable moment? It is fine to know that moral values candidates have sex. But we do not want detailed descriptions of our lawmakers’ junk. These people are not fit, young athletes, and it is a slippery slope: One day it may seem acceptable to Gawker to post a photo of shriveled old Robert Byrd’s death boner. And that is not okay. [New York Observer]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 175 comments }

ifthethunderdontgetya October 28, 2010 at 8:25 pm

If elected to the Human Senate she will fly right down to D.C. on her magic dildo.
~

elfgoldsackring October 28, 2010 at 8:25 pm

It has teeth.

Texan_Bulldog October 28, 2010 at 9:06 pm

Like a bear trap?

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:34 am

It has a fancy Latin name of Vagina Dentata.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina_dentata

Serolf_Divad October 28, 2010 at 8:27 pm

Ummmm… Clarence Thomas?

Delicious_2 October 28, 2010 at 8:29 pm

Today, we are all Christine O'Donnell.

assistantatlas October 28, 2010 at 8:46 pm

Dude, where have you been? We've all been Christine O'Donnell for like, a couple of weeks now. She's us and we're her, remember? Please try to keep up.

Delicious_2 October 28, 2010 at 9:32 pm

Actually, not here. But I shall correct myself.

Today, we are all Christine O'Donnell's pubic hair.

LionelHutzEsq October 29, 2010 at 12:42 am

And her pubic hairs are us.

Clancy_Pants October 29, 2010 at 5:39 am

I just threw up in my mouth

Serolf_Divad October 29, 2010 at 9:08 am

Wild, full and unkempt!

PocketsTheClown October 28, 2010 at 9:13 pm

I, for one, will welcome our half Rachel Ray half that angry hirsute waitress from office space with the linty pooter Senate Overlord… now for the Coons "walking in the Appalachians" moment in 3, 2, 1…

twoeightnine October 29, 2010 at 12:51 am

Sorry but this Christine O'Donnell trims.

CablinasianDem October 28, 2010 at 8:31 pm

I can't wait to see all the articles and tweets written by Politico staff tomorrow decrying Gawker for reporting this. Perhaps they'll use the same hashtags they used when they reported on Carly Fiorina criticizing Barbara Boxer's hair, Ben Quayle, and the Edwards sex tape.

Remember prospective j-school applicants, it's only gutter journalism if you get scooped.

facehead October 28, 2010 at 8:31 pm

The most important detail, of course, is the identity of this great investigative boy scout journalist. Which, of course, I will now reveal:
http://www.foxnews.com/images/302354/1_21_elderly

DashboardBuddha October 28, 2010 at 8:52 pm

Keee-rist! is that a face only a road-side rest stop or out-of-the-way playground could love?

weejee October 28, 2010 at 8:53 pm

Wuz he a real pencil dick as a Scout and earn the Order of the Narrow?

tbogg October 28, 2010 at 8:31 pm

But.. but …her birth certificate says she's Brazilian. Something is not right here.

PsycWench October 28, 2010 at 9:57 pm

Only her vagina's birth certificate says that.

EdFlintstone October 28, 2010 at 8:32 pm

No brainer, Christine wanted to be teabagged.

weejee October 28, 2010 at 8:54 pm

She does look like she's getting ready to gargoyle gargle.

the_problem_child October 28, 2010 at 8:34 pm

Details left out: Whatever happened to that pearl necklace.

Crank_Tango October 28, 2010 at 9:37 pm

did she declare it as a campaign donation? prolly not.

GuyClinch October 28, 2010 at 8:34 pm

Okay, this is all getting a bit squalid. I don't ever want to read about or think about Christine's vagina ever again. At least until Playboy offers her $1,000,000 to pose, and she accepts.

Lascauxcaveman October 28, 2010 at 9:31 pm

She's bound to find a job eventually.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 28, 2010 at 8:35 pm

I was going to guess that she was constantly asking “Is it in yet? Is it in yet?”
Too crude?

imissopus October 28, 2010 at 8:48 pm

Based on prior speculation about this boy's experience level, I would have gone with "Ouch, that's my nostril!"

Monsieur_Grumpe October 28, 2010 at 9:24 pm

Who was it that said “ An orifice is an orifice is an orifice.”?

SayItWithWookies October 28, 2010 at 9:49 pm

Hmmm — Gertrude Steinem?

DoktorZoom October 28, 2010 at 11:09 pm
GeoffPeterson October 29, 2010 at 9:27 am

If she really hadn't had sex since college, then that question shouldn't have come up…

Lucidamente1 October 28, 2010 at 8:38 pm

You forgot the Coke can, Jack.

OkieDokieDog October 28, 2010 at 8:38 pm

I read the Gawker story earlier today, and I'm not about to read it again, so didn't the nameless bro (which is kinda assholey, but then I wouldn't want my friends to know that I had seen her nekkid butt and pubes either, so…) say that O'Donnell took her clothes off, said she was a virgin (meaning born again virgin – hahahaha! yeah, that works) but then didn't really want to have sex? So what's up with that?
I find this whole story just… well, not really newsworthy, but then neither is she, or Sarah Palin, yet these two and all the other Conservative Feminists that have risen in the Tea Party/GOP ranks seem to be the NEW woman. I don't like these women. Not.one.single.pube. on their stupid twats.

nachoproblem October 29, 2010 at 8:04 am

It's probably that Conservative Feminism thing you mentioned. "I support every woman's right to be just like me!" Oh, thank you so much.

PublicLuxury October 28, 2010 at 8:39 pm

Perhaps this Woody lover was a rug muncher instead of a fudge packer. Your occupation would mean a lot to this fundie-girl.

LibrulEleet October 28, 2010 at 8:46 pm

I didn't fuck Christine O'Donnell either. Where do I go for my 15 minutes of fame?

kenlayisalive October 28, 2010 at 8:46 pm

I'm assuming to make this model of her vagina we'll need some craft sticks (which I have plenty of) and tempura paints (of which I'm all out).

So, should I just wait for the plans to come out in next month's 'Boy's Life' or what?

DashboardBuddha October 28, 2010 at 8:50 pm

No sir…the article in next month's Boy's Life is about how to light a fire with Christine OD's vagina.

elfgoldsackring October 28, 2010 at 8:51 pm

Tempura? More like sashimi, I would think.

PublicLuxury October 28, 2010 at 9:05 pm

Random House is selling a kit. It has everything you'll need. As a bonus you get a ship in the bottle and a hide the salami kit.

kenlayisalive October 28, 2010 at 9:08 pm

Coo! So it comes with the aphids, right?

PublicLuxury October 28, 2010 at 9:16 pm

Aphids and root rot. Be careful of the root rot.

4TheTurnstiles October 28, 2010 at 8:47 pm

Dude, Layne, she's not a fucking lawmaker and God willing she never will be. She's a very capable ladybug, to her credit.

Ken Layne October 28, 2010 at 11:48 pm

Are you people taking my name in vain, again? This one is Jack's post. (Mine has more comments, har har.)

4TheTurnstiles October 29, 2010 at 8:20 am

Mea Culpa boss.

chascates October 28, 2010 at 8:47 pm

"Masturbating witch-hobbit" is pretty good.

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:42 am

Hobbits may have hirsute tootsies, but J.R.R. Tolkien — thank Skydaddy — did not describe any mythical genitalia that I know of, or ComiCon would be 10x weirder after dark with things like Orc junk stench competitions and Elf "swashbuckling".

neiltheblaze October 28, 2010 at 8:52 pm

Christine's pussy is as pure and cold as a mountain stream. Expect shrinkage.

Badonkadonkette October 28, 2010 at 8:55 pm

But we do not want detailed descriptions of our lawmakers’ junk.

In that case, apparently I have always misunderstood the implication of "Walnuts."

ifthethunderdontgetya October 28, 2010 at 8:59 pm

Not an option.
~

Crank_Tango October 28, 2010 at 9:10 pm

Let he who wouldn't jack off on her and pass out cast the first stone.

donner_froh October 28, 2010 at 9:10 pm

This story has legs–and boobs and lots of other stuff that would be delightful except that it is about Christine fucking O'Donnell who makes everything bad.

HistoriCat October 29, 2010 at 11:32 am

Christine O'Donnell seems like she would be a lot of fun to hang out with – if she had laryngitis.

savethispatient October 28, 2010 at 9:14 pm

Can you be considered hypocritical when you're quite so adorably kooky? I mean, she's never harmed anything, apart from the GOP's chances of winning the Delaware Senate seat.

LEAVE CHRISTINE ALONE! <sob>

kenlayisalive October 28, 2010 at 9:28 pm

I know, I feel the same way.

But then she says something like "rape and incest are just scare tactics of the pro-life movement" and I want to rip her antennae off.

savethispatient October 28, 2010 at 9:35 pm

Hmmm yeah. By "adorably kooky" I mean "everything she says is wrong".

jimnewell October 28, 2010 at 9:17 pm

"It is fine to know that moral values candidates have sex. But we do not want detailed descriptions of our lawmakers’ junk."

What has become of this website?

Monsieur_Grumpe October 28, 2010 at 9:33 pm

Yeah, it really has gone downhill since Sara left.

jimnewell October 28, 2010 at 9:42 pm

I know. I shouldn't have slut-shamed her into quitting.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 28, 2010 at 9:54 pm

Hmmmmm, sounds like you've playing too much Leather Goddess of Phoebes again.

Lascauxcaveman October 28, 2010 at 9:41 pm

Well, it's not quite as funny as when you were here, but Gawker seems to have not gotten any funnier either.

How come they won't let you cut loose over there, Jimmy? We were expecting more Wonkettish stuff; we thought that's why they hired you in the first place.

jimnewell October 28, 2010 at 9:56 pm

Oh Lascaux, +1 points for you, sir. I just hope this Jackington fellow is ready and willing to post explicit stories about old lawmaker cock if and when the opportunity presents itself. I used to love just irritating and disgusting regular readers on purpose. But maybe that's just me. I'll tell you, though, I hated it here when the "work day" ended, almost every day.

I'm not sure it's a matter of them not "cutting me loose" as it is me "really wanting to fuck off for a week and not read about politics." I still type jokes, though. Sorry if they're not funny, I can't tell anymore. Sometimes I enjoy making arguments and throwing in facts, as stupid and false as they may be and surely are. But it's nice when I can go back to a post a month later and have some idea of what the fuck I was talking about.

Lascauxcaveman October 28, 2010 at 10:07 pm

You make it sound as if you've completed some kind of 12-step program.

jimnewell October 28, 2010 at 10:12 pm

I'm just typing bullshit.

jimnewell October 28, 2010 at 10:02 pm

Now why have I accrued a "+11" on my first contribution, but watched my p-score go down? I have no idea how this new electronic version of Wonkette works.

Crank_Tango October 28, 2010 at 10:16 pm

no one knows how it works, but we won't judge you by the size of your p-ness anyway. Pube grooming, yes.

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:47 am

There was an analog version of Wonkette?

Was it steampunk or something, with gears, knobs and levers and 1000's of women with hair buns and ankle length skirts typing into telegraph machines?

jimnewell October 29, 2010 at 1:04 am

It was a big tire fire off the highway that we threw children into.

LionelHutzEsq October 29, 2010 at 12:50 am

Give Jack a break; Ken hasn't sent him to cover Breitbart or a Young Republican meeting yet.

Lascauxcaveman October 29, 2010 at 1:21 am

Jack's very good.

Mind you, he's no "Jim Newell in his Prime" but he has that potential, if I'm any judge. And since Jimmy has retired to the sleepy, moneyed environs of the Gawker empire, the mantle has been lying there, waiting to be taken up.

I think our Jack may have what it takes. The bile, the bitterness, the sarcasm, the jé ne sais gingér, it's all there, seething under the surface.

We're pulling for you, Jack.

Gleem_McShineys October 29, 2010 at 3:26 pm

"We're pulling for you, Jack."

You libtards just haven't made enough masturbation euphemism-jokes already on other Christine O'Donnell threads, already? Skum!

Wadisay October 30, 2010 at 1:28 pm

Is it too late to start a "Pulling for Boehner" shadowy soft money group?

Pop_Socket October 29, 2010 at 7:08 am

Ah, the golden days of yore when ass-fucking and panda bears were all the rage.

LionelHutzEsq October 28, 2010 at 9:19 pm

Clearly what they left out was her intention to stay a born again virgin, but not a born again ass virgin.

Beowoof October 29, 2010 at 11:43 am

Really what is she doing in bed with no pants on if there is no fucking going on. Well no tradional fucking, but there must be lots of ass fucking and oral. Most women I have been with say anal orgasms are more intense.

Not_So_Much October 28, 2010 at 9:20 pm

I presume the Photoshop of her tickling the balls of a ginormous schlong threatening her open, cakehole in this pic is forthcoming?

fatoots October 28, 2010 at 9:23 pm

Meh, they probably left out the part where she was so drunk she gagged and puked all over his crotch.

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:49 am

My favorite is when you get your girl home stupid drunk and you wake up in the middle of the sound of their vomitshit, ah romance.

Blendergoathead October 28, 2010 at 9:31 pm

An "editor" at Gawker doesn't know how to spell "judgment." No wonder old whats-his-face went to go work for those star-fucking, spritzer-drinking weenies.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to track back up and chase links until I see O'Donnell's pubes (I'd actually settle for an artist's rendering, but I'm an optimist).

Mahousu October 28, 2010 at 10:59 pm

This should be pretty close to what you're looking for: http://www.naturephoto-cz.eu/crown-of-thorns-star

Crank_Tango October 28, 2010 at 9:33 pm

oh christ, i have a pic of two ladybugs banging, i wonder how i can post it on here…

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:43 am

Upload to Flickr, link ?

di_da_is_alpha October 29, 2010 at 12:55 am

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oG7hkvU8pMlpwA6qRXNyo

Don't ask me to wipe your ass for you too, prog. I'm sure Obama will have a government program for that soon.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 2:15 am
Crank_Tango October 29, 2010 at 11:20 am

thanks! I like how that other bug came up and asked if there was room for one more. pretty much like Xtine OD's halloween night.

seppdecker October 28, 2010 at 9:47 pm

"One day it may seem acceptable to Gawker to post a photo of shriveled old Robert Byrd’s death boner. And that is not okay."

I have a feeling Carl Paladino would be cool with those photos.

Canmon October 28, 2010 at 9:49 pm

Why is Chris Coons hiding his pubes?

noodlesalad October 28, 2010 at 9:50 pm

This is great news, for John McCain! Seriously, he's read this story like five times now. It's getting creepy.

transfatz October 28, 2010 at 10:06 pm

Say, isn't that one of the insect minds the trolls from Breitbart are always disparaging? Christine is a progressive? Who knew.

di_da_is_alpha October 29, 2010 at 12:57 am

She's too good looking to be a prog.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 2:28 am
thecryingeagle October 28, 2010 at 10:17 pm

I loved that he was paid "in the low four figures." This sounds like a Huffington Post rate.

Buzz Feedback October 28, 2010 at 10:20 pm

Was "Robert Byrd's death boner" wearing a white hood?

Steverino247 October 28, 2010 at 10:21 pm

I can see not fucking her because it seemed "too easy," which can be creepy, but not fucking her because she didn't trim her pubic hair?! Does this guy have hot and cold running pussy installed in his apartment such that he can turn some down when it is eagerly awaiting a thorough fucking right in front of him? What an asshole!

commiegirl October 29, 2010 at 11:51 am

Jesus, no shit, right? "OBVIOUSLY I am a total tool who is terrified of some good healthy bush"! Somebody send that poor scared boy a picture of Demi Moore's magnificent, lush ladyfoliage.

OCKerouac October 29, 2010 at 12:32 pm

If so, I'm betting the 'cold' tap doesn't get much business…

Gleem_McShineys October 29, 2010 at 3:36 pm

cold tap = Robert Byrd death boner reference?

elpinche October 28, 2010 at 10:25 pm

In the end, voters will recognize that hard working patriotic Americans don't have time to wax…unlike elitits women like Michelle Obama and her cleanly shaven runway from some fancy DC spa. And don't forget those pampered smooth thighs and hot calves from working out all the time at some fancy gym while I work at Pep boys all night long. Michelle probably wears high heels when she's banging Barry Hussein on the oval office desk while he holds her firm smooth chocolate ass on every down stroke, like a government handout. That's not the America I want.

elpinche October 28, 2010 at 10:27 pm

In the end, voters will recognize that hard working patriotic Americans don't have time to wax…unlike elitits women like Michelle Obama and her cleanly shaven runway from some fancy DC spa. And don't forget those pampered smooth thighs and hot calves working all the time at some fancy gym while I work at Pepboys all night long. Michelle probably wears high heels when she's banging Barry Hussein on the oval office desk while he holds her firm smooth chocolate ass on every down stroke, like a government handout. That's not the America I want.

el_donaldo October 28, 2010 at 10:54 pm

Please continue, sir. Are your rates hourly or by the quarter hour? Perchance you have completed narratives describing this America we do not want that could be quickly perused in a private moment?

MissTaken October 29, 2010 at 2:08 am

I could really use a cigarette right now.

elpinche October 29, 2010 at 10:29 am

Ok…it's just a cheap way to get p points.

GreyRogue October 29, 2010 at 11:25 am

…. I'll be in my bunk.

BklynIlluminati October 29, 2010 at 1:25 pm

Ok i just had a mind suppression moment. The FLOTUS is my political Madonna (Mary not the skank pop star). Michelle is pure as Harriett Tubman, Rosa Parks, Mary mother of Jesus did i say that already? Anyway you fucking made me vaporlock.

DeLand_DeLakes October 28, 2010 at 10:28 pm

I am so tired of everyone constantly hating on my favorite little mound of mess! I am of course talking about pubes.

Beowoof October 29, 2010 at 11:48 am

Hopefully not Christine O'Donnell's pubes.

Missyb9479 October 28, 2010 at 10:46 pm

Christine O'Donnell isn't obsesses with keeping her pubes looking porn ready, likes naked cuddling, and has is attracted to assholes.

I guess she really is me.

sezme October 28, 2010 at 10:56 pm

Tell us then, how are his pubic hairs? That's all anyone seems to care about anymore.

BipolarBadger October 28, 2010 at 10:58 pm

I think they left out that she has Genital Hogwarts

Sparky_McGruff October 28, 2010 at 11:00 pm

I have to say, reading this makes me feel a bit dirty. Not David Vitter shitting in a diaper and having a hooker change me dirty, but dirty nevertheless.

OldRedneck October 28, 2010 at 11:04 pm

This guy should have done what any good Alaskan Bush Pilot would have done — just closed his eyes and set it down where he thinks the landing strip is.

Numbat_Dundee October 28, 2010 at 11:33 pm

Or brought in Ken Layne to finish it for him – beard to beard.

nuketunguska October 29, 2010 at 3:38 pm

No wonder they call them "bush pilots"!

slappypaddy October 28, 2010 at 11:08 pm

yeah, there's some ass stuff going on, all right.

Barrelhse October 28, 2010 at 11:26 pm

Which BRAND of tuna?

Mrspanky October 28, 2010 at 11:30 pm

"Let me tell you a story. A Body Count Love Story…

You know I' ve been all around the world. Went to Philly and met the finest white girl.

Brown hair, a bug suit and big thighs – the kind of girl that would turn on most guys.

She got wild in her auntie's bedroom. Sucked my dick like a mother fucking vacuum.

But when I tried to fuck her, she stopped me and say – "I'm a virgin and just can't play!"

tribbzthesquidz October 28, 2010 at 11:45 pm

Oh man, she is totally the kind of girl I hear tell about, that one picks up at the club, takes home and haz a(n) hate/love session. She's fresh and clean at the church meetin' the next day. That's kinky stuff. There's probably pictures too. It's only a matter of time.
Why don't these people understand that everybody's got one?

Extemporanus October 28, 2010 at 11:48 pm

OMFGROFLMFOBGYNAO!!1

di_da_is_alpha October 29, 2010 at 12:59 am

YASMFPOSBDWIKYQ .

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 2:19 am
BarackMyWorld October 28, 2010 at 11:52 pm

Hey, remember how at the beginning of this year we were all making jokes about Scott Brown's pubes? There's definitely a precedent for this here, folks.

BarackMyWorld October 28, 2010 at 11:55 pm

How about warning us about 9/11 or Dubya next time, jerk?

SayItWithWookies October 29, 2010 at 1:21 am

See, if you heed my warning about which way Bubba's pecker hangs the rest will take care of itself. It's all part of the plan. And now that I think of it, this does sorta implicate Ken Starr and Henry Hyde and all them in 9/11.

lumpenprole October 29, 2010 at 12:13 pm

I never thought about how hard it must be for a time traveler to NEVER FORGET 911! Sounds complicated.

PhillipMarlowe6 October 29, 2010 at 12:27 am

Reminds me of the time I went to see Marty Augustine, a Jewish mobster.
He wanted me, himself and his entire entourage (except for Pepe who had too many knife scars and Joanne who was bandaged up from the coke bottle her lover Marty put to her nose) to take our clothes off to show we had nothing to hide.
He said he understood our embarrassment because he was embarrassed back in his school days preparing for gym class because he didn't have any pubic hair until he was 15.
To which I quipped, You must have looked like one of the 3 Little pigs.

Watch it here: http://movieclips.com/6QFLJ-the-long-goodbye-movi

Egregious644 October 29, 2010 at 2:40 pm

That's Gov. Schwarzenegger in the scene,

horsedreamer_1 October 29, 2010 at 2:26 am

I found a coupla spelling errors in the piece, but compared to other Gawker Media sexy-time round-ups, it was quite well-composed.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 2:31 am

Don't you idiots have some real news to report? Oh, that's right. You don't.

natoslug October 29, 2010 at 9:07 am

What do you think this is? CNN? Pubes and lubes are our reasons for living. Degenerate sex and the occasional politics are at the heart of our ouevre. If you want hard-hitting stories of a horse stuck in a ditch, you need to look elsewhere.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 10:42 pm

That statement says more about you than anything I ever could. Too. Also.

Oblios_Cap October 29, 2010 at 11:24 am

Greasy Rabbit? Is that you Breibarters call the Santorum these days?

GOPCrusher October 29, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Its another name for The Alabama Hot Pocket.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 10:42 pm

Oblios_Cap? Is that Lib-speak for "I'm a douchebag"? Too. Also.

Oblios_Cap October 31, 2010 at 9:42 am

Google it using your Cheeto-stained fingers. You're probably too young to get the reference.

GreasyRabbit75 October 31, 2010 at 9:56 am

You're right; my bad. This explains everything. Too. Also.
http://denver.citysearch.com/profile/1833571/denv

Beowoof October 29, 2010 at 12:00 pm

Is that the name of your car or the road kill you picked up for dinner last night.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 10:44 pm

With a name like Be-a-woofer, I would guess you are the roadkill-eater. After chasing cars of course. Sounds like the typical progressive chick. Too. Also.

BaldarTFlagass October 29, 2010 at 2:43 pm

Your powers of observation must be at their zenith. Yeah, we're real fucking serious here, can'tcha tell? If you really want to torque off your opposition, go log in at DailyKos or Think Progress. You can really get their panties in a twist over there, rather than just being laughed at.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 10:48 pm

See above, douche.

Kevin Stowell October 29, 2010 at 10:52 pm

Have fun, Greasy. Bedtime for me.

GreasyRabbit75 October 29, 2010 at 10:53 pm

I hate showing up late to the party. Next time, pizza and beer are on me!

di_da_is_alpha October 30, 2010 at 12:48 am

Hey, jackass, if this is gonna be a satirical site, then hit BOTH sides. The left has some real prime mocking material, but you bozos only hit the right. That makes this site fair game.

Oblios_Cap October 31, 2010 at 9:38 am

Don't you Breibarters have some little boys to diddle? Jeez, just because Andrew grabs Wag's ass doesn't mean that you have to come over here with your mindless drivel and pollute our site, too.

di_da_is_alpha October 31, 2010 at 1:29 pm

Hey, it's you progs that like e'em young………………… http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGdXOspM1MLSIA.61XNyo

Pollute your site !!!!!!! Hhahahahahah

Turd #1 : "Look! Someone dropped a diamond ring in our sewer !!"

Turd #2 : Oh, damn! There goes the neighborhood. "

Kevin Stowell October 31, 2010 at 4:14 pm

"mindless drivel"

"Don't you Breibarters have some little boys to diddle?"

Got it.

BaldarTFlagass October 29, 2010 at 8:05 am

"Photos of a 1:1 scale model of this vagina, along with blueprints for making a replica of our own."
Why couldn't the dude just make a plaster cast?

dr_giraud October 29, 2010 at 8:52 am

"Why did I buy this genuine to scale, deluxe Aurora Christine O'Donnell life-size Vagina Model Kit? Um. um, um . . . shit. You got me. I sniff glue."

GunTotingProgressive October 29, 2010 at 9:21 am

And it you want to see her love, just ask him.

Mindblank October 29, 2010 at 9:32 am

Shriveled death Boehner? Why, it's orange and a particularly good pattern for carving on pumpkins.

mrblifil October 29, 2010 at 9:45 am

Fuck Bush.

Nopantsmcgee October 29, 2010 at 10:21 am

Because of this story I now feel sorry for Christine. Thank you very fucking much, Gawker.

thefrontpage October 29, 2010 at 10:21 am

This O'Donnell woman, or whatever her name is, and Palin, and that former spokeswoman for Bush and many others like them–who some wayward people somehow find attractive–completely, 100 percent lose all of their attractiveness, sexiness and positive personality traits by being associated with the increasingly moronic, idiotic, wayward, out-of-it, and just incredibly stupid far right, ultra-conservative, racist, sexist and homophobic Republican party hard-liners. So these women are not attractive, on any level. If anything, they're ugly–on every level. And none of them should be holding a political office, especially these O'Donnell and Palin poseur creatures.

BaldarTFlagass October 29, 2010 at 1:30 pm

What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
But I think it's
YOUR MIND

BarackMyWorld October 31, 2010 at 10:48 am

I must be more shallow than you, because to me that's just the difference between kicking them out afterwards and making them breakfast in the morning.

guerillanation October 29, 2010 at 10:30 am

A witch with a wooly booger – now I know what I'm gonna be for Halloween!

zhubajie October 29, 2010 at 10:55 am

Does Benn Hinn "heal" lost virginity? It could be a whole new ministry/business for up and coming faith healers!

Gleem_McShineys October 29, 2010 at 3:45 pm

LET THE MERKIN HIT THE FLOOR!
LET THE MERKIN HIT THE FLOOR!

FoxyO_Wiley October 29, 2010 at 10:57 am

Witchy lips
Hair for two
What breweth there
In Christine's stew

MrsBiggTime October 29, 2010 at 10:58 am

Wow. After reading your bullet points I'd rather put a bullet in my head than partake in another vagina, O'Donnell-tang or otherwise.

DarwinianDemon October 29, 2010 at 11:16 am

Thank goodness Wonkette distanced itself from this sordid and uncouth "Gawker" website long ago. Now…let us turn our attention back to more savory affairs such as "nutz" and the truckz that love them.

BklynIlluminati October 29, 2010 at 1:17 pm

i am totally hot for her right now

finallyhappy October 29, 2010 at 1:46 pm

I didn't read most of this- I am old and this is gross.

Gleem_McShineys October 29, 2010 at 3:46 pm

Robert Byrd?? HOW IS THE AFTERLIFE DUDE?!

Egregious644 October 29, 2010 at 1:51 pm

I'm not too old, but maybe it's a generational thing. If a hot babe a few years older than me climbs bareass into my bed, I wouldn't care if her hoo-ha was as hairy as Danny DeVito's. This idot gets offends and rolls over to fall asleep? Then, the next morning she's still hot to go and he just takes her home?

It must be easier out there for these guys than it ever was for me. That's the depressing part.

BarackMyWorld October 31, 2010 at 10:50 am

Sadly, thanks to the "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" Christmas special DVD from last year, I know exactly what you mean about Danny DeVito.

Egregious644 October 29, 2010 at 1:57 pm

I'm not too old, but maybe it's a generational thing. If a hot babe a few years older than me climbs bareass into my bed, I wouldn't care if her hoo-ha was as hairy as Danny DeVito's. This idot gets offends and rolls over to fall asleep? Then, the next morning she's still hot to go and he just takes her home?

beer4prez October 29, 2010 at 4:48 pm

I have a question. Feel free not to answer it, but I'm completely unfamiliar with how this whole blogs-paying-randos-for-dirt thing works. There was iPhone, then Favre (which, BTW, Deadspin seems like they accomplished what Brett couldn't and totally screwed her), and now this.

So: First, if someone comes to a blog with a story, how detailed does the pitch have to be for money to exchange hands. As in, could he say 'I have dirt on CO'D" and they pay him the money. Or does he say "I hooked up with CO'D, if you want the whole story pay me in the low four." Or, what?

Second, where does integrity play into it. Because it's days before an important mid-term election, we have at least a handful of crazies that are AHEAD in the polls with truly Halloween-level scary platforms, and the blogs are all abuzz with … an obvious loser's nether regions. Talk about wanting to get back to Sanity.

zhubajie October 29, 2010 at 6:22 pm

They left out photos of said pubic hair, of course. Also analysis of samples for drug use, etc.

Plowmon October 29, 2010 at 8:35 pm

I kinda like a saddle-bagged chicks with a rug…

Barrelhse October 30, 2010 at 10:46 pm

Man, are YOU in luck!!1!

Plowmon October 31, 2010 at 10:41 am

In today's economy we must be reasonable in our expectations…

Wadisay October 30, 2010 at 1:22 pm

I think the part of this story we are not hearing is where the anonymous dude dressed up like a male lady bug and tried to spray her with pheremones.

Rarian Rakista October 29, 2010 at 12:37 am

That looks like a Jewish grandmother who plays stickball, wtf?

twoeightnine October 29, 2010 at 12:54 am

Yeah but you've been doing that for years.

Kevin Stowell October 31, 2010 at 11:11 am

I'll make it point not to eat any of that next time I'm in Denver.

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