Republican congressional candidate Sean Bielat has a simple logic problem for you here: If men shorter than 5’2″ can’t serve in military combat, why should gays get to? “I don’t see anybody protesting. Where are the people standing in front of the White House, the short guys standing in front of the White House? You don’t see it,” Bielat said, apparently unaware of the birther rally that was on the Mall this past weekend. This is the man who is running against Barney Frank. What ever happened to the LaRouchie who was running against Frank and called Obama a Nazi? That lady seems like a sober arbiter of political facts now. But never mind, some people are actually saying Bielat could win this.
A new Boston Globe poll puts Barney Frank ahead of his GOP challenger, Sean Bielat, by a 46 to 33 percent margin. That may sound like good news for the incumbent, until you consider that Frank, who was first elected in 1980, has never won a general election by fewer than 20 points — and that he’s notched at least 64 percent of the vote in every race since 1990.
Still, we are betting on the gay short man with the lisp. Barney Frank should be allowed to serve in the military if he wants to. [Boston Herald via Newell/Salon]
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What a mental midget.
There are lots of short people standing in front of the White House. You're just looking too high.
Too easy? I hate myself.
"Aim low, boys; they're ridin' Shetland Ponies!" – Evil Roy Slade's famous war cry.
He's got a point. Recruiting "little people" would cause to much hilarity and ensuing shenanigans, ruining unit cohesion.
You got that right. You just can't make pretty formations for marching in parades and such with them little guys spoiling the look. Until that damned Harry Truman, we had special munchkin brigaids, but Harry was all lump everybody together, so, it's their own fault really.
And pretty formations is what it is all about, really.
When DADT finally gets repealed, you think 'mos will want to march in unsightly and unfabulous formations? Hell no; they'll get Project Runway winners to spruce things up.
"to much hilarity and ensuing shenanigans, ruining unit cohesion."
Guess you never saw Stripes.
Now take Stripes and add Wee-man, Mini-me and Nelson de la Rosa to it. Imagine it. Drink it in.
See?
Just don't tell anyone that you are short. Or ask.
Don't ask don't measure? That'll make for some awfully long cuffs or high water dress blues out there. Perhaps they should rename it "only my quartermaster knows for sure" so at least they can get the right pants.
Short people should be allowed to serve, just so long as they're not *openly* short.
I DON' KEER IFFIN' THATS AS HYE AS U GO, U STOP STARRIN' AT MUH GROYNN, KWEER!1!!
Its Don't Axe, Don't Tell.
They make shoe lifts for a reason, damnit!
He's got a good point… By the same token, when was the last time you saw a man demanding a free abortion for himself??? Could this prove that abortion is just a crazy "female" thing that liberals feel compelled to pander to for votes???
Or – you never see dogs arrested for drunk driving? Why do so many people drink and drive? Should we only give drivers licenses to dogs? Maybe…
Yeah, and if drunk driving is so wrong, why do so many suburban bars have parking lots? Huh? I'm Bender and I approved this post.
There's no point even trying to make counter arguments to people that say shit this stupid. It's best to just roll your eyes, walk away, and lament the breakneck pace of our country's decline…
Or make snarky post-modernist jokes.
Someone should report this to the people at the Campaign for Equal Heights.
1) Barney Frank should also be allowed to gay marry aborted Muslin foetuses.
2) I weep when I see how many people plan to vote for unqualified nutjobs with the IQs of cucumbers, also.
why must you insult cucumbers like that?
Has this guy been experimenting with mouse brains?
'Cause they got little hands and little eyes
They walk around telling great big lies
Sean Bielat believes that gay people have no reason to live
And seriously, I saw the headline and rejoiced for Randy Newman joketime.
You must be this high to get the b00bies.
I think Sarkozy might have circumvented that rule.
It could be that Carla likes men that are right about, yes, right about, oh yes, that height.
"The short guys standing in front of the White House. You just don't see it".
That's because they're so short!
Somebody stop me…
Apparently he never saw a Tom of Finland drawing; otherwise, he would surely understand the benefits that teh gheys can bring to a nation's military.
So ShortsShortsShorts is SUPER Gay?
Well, I guess this nails down Willem Dafoe's next shitty movie role, then.
duh. All the short people go to hollywood.
Everybody knows dwares are asexual.
Those parents on "Little People, Big World" clearly hired actors to portray their 'children'.
Any Pritchett reader knows dwarves are VERY sexual; the females’ beards are slightly shorter.
Something about Bielat's eyes says the Marines didn't ask, and he didn't tell.
Take it away, Randy…
This is actually quite enlightened thinking on the part of a GOP candidate. One's height is not chosen, nor is one's sexuality, is what he's saying.
DON'T MEASURE, DON'T TELL!
No, he's just saying short people can have civil unions.
But can they have a cake? They could be their own cake toppers!
Can't we just settle on stupid people not being allowed to be congressmen?
Or would that narrow the field too much?
There wouldn't be any. Same-same if ugly people were banned.
isn't rush holt a physicist?
So something that effects your physical ability to do a particular thing is exactly as disqualifying as something that in no way effects your physical ability to do a thing? That's like saying that because Sean Bielat has a very small penis, we shouldn't allow him into the NBA.
Maybe we shouldn't allow him into the NBA because he can't land a jump shot, eh?
Cranberry juice meets computer screen for the win!
Thanks to Ken Buck and Sean Bielat, we now know that being gay is just like being Herve Villechaize.
OK – who the hell hates Herve enough to down-thumb that comment?
Tank you…
Guess he's not afraid of the gay activist bloc. Which may be a miscalculation on his part.
Or, the even more powerful Gay Activist/Short People Coalition.
What about the powerful short gay activists? Elton John will have him crying.
But seriously, folks. I know you're all having fun with this, but the truth is:
Gay people are just the same as you and I
All men are brothers till the day we die.
It's a wonderful world.
Now back to work. Everyone. Not so fast, Mara.
Of course. Most gays can see over the top of the foxhole to shoot their weapon, just like the average breeder. Short people, well….I'm sure the military/industrial complex can come up with a battle tested foot stool.
What's the old adage? There are no midgets in foxholes. And there are no midgets on Foxnews. Coincidence? I think not.
If this douchebag gets elected I am going to be pissed. he actually thinks same sex marriage should be a referendum.
I just don't think I could stand the neo-con gloating ala Scott Brown's victory if the GOP gains control.
It's really the media right? They've been reporting for weeks the Dems are going to lose the House and maybe now the Senate. They just want people to stay home, right? FML
Since I'm a little bit over two meters tall, I take this as a shameful attempt at pandering for the "Tall-but-didn't-do-anything-to-deserve-it" voter.
Or shoot them out of cannon! Imagine the fear instilled in the enemy when they see a 4 or 5 foot marine, bayonet extended, screamming boooooya, coming at them at 770m/s.
That's right, I'm using metric velocities.
Ooh, I just read somewhere (the New Yorker, I believe, so it must be true, heh) that he was actually 5'8" and the short thing was attributed to both a mistake in translating measurements and propaganda.
Yes, he was actually tall end of average or tall.
I like to think the short rumors had to do with penis size myself.
Yeah, French inches (pouce) were bigger than English inches.
Someone ought to punch his kneecaps out.
You get the knees; Lascaux will get the throat.
Think about the children! They'd be likely to be short, too.
As a constituent in this district, I'd like to inform the internets that there's way too many gays/short gays in the area for Barney to lose. Thanks gerrymandering!
Boston Jerry sounds like a euphemism for a sexual act that cannot be described. Like a Cleveland Steamer. Or a Hot Karl. Or Santorum.
Like when the recipient of oral is right about to finish, the giver punches them in the taint, and yells the first thing that comes to mind that involves the words wicked or Fenway.
It seems I've been doing that wrong.
It's ADAM AND EVE, not Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec and Eve!
Short people to Sean Beilat: blow me!
Being short is a lifestyle choice. Sure, maybe there's a genetic component, you know, like alcoholism. But I don't think as a nation we should go around rewarding people who choose to be unsuccessful.
Maybe he should do like that guy from Alaska does….run from the press so you never have to speak and be "misquoted out of context not meaning what I said".
This and some stupid study reported on NPR this morning regarding short people & intelligence…really? Really? They tried to gloss it with nutrition studies/height (and yes, there are some correlations), but come on-the study and reporting was offensive.
Stupid comes in all sizes. Smart comes in all sizes. Gay people can be smart, stupid, musically adept, tone deaf, bookish, jocky, blah blah blah. Terrorists can be bedecked in Nascar wear or a Burka. Women can be smart, stupid, funny, boring. So can men. Red heads can be sexy or gross. Blondes, black hair, brown hair, green hair…WTF is wrong with people? EVOLVE ARGHHHHH
<falls over, drops bottle>
<picks up bottle before much spills> "Hel is going to need this later on. Better keep it somewhere safe."
Thank you DB, thank you.
<drops bottle> = alcohol abuse
Just like teabaggers, they can be stupid or…okay, bad example.
Where are the twig-wielding Short Panther Party thugkins when ya need 'em?!
Mmmm, short folks in Vietnam got to go in the tunnels. Wuz that 'cause of the size of the tunnels or eugenics?
At the carousel in our carnival district, there is a 37" cut-out of Ronald McDonald with the inscription "BOYS, YOU MUST BE GAYER THAN ME TO RIDE SIDE- SADDLE!"
I think he meant that like him all gays have short dicks. I think he may need to try a few more inserted anally to adjust his opinion.
Can't we have some kind of measure like: "Congress…you have to __ smart to work here."
___ <- "make my ass"
___ < – "swindle"
But they do get to serve, in the Lollipop Guild!
These Wee People simply have the jump on douchebaskets like Bielat. They have already sunken to his level and didn't have to resort to idiocy to do so.
FACT: IF you lose an election to a lisping gay hobbit, you become a lisping gay hobbit yourself.
"Where are …the short guys standing in front of the White House?" What Bielat meant to say was, "As long as you're down there, would a blowjob be completely out of the question?"
I think this guy is full of crap. I'm 5' 2" and I served.
Varney the Vampire! Ugly, bad-breath and stupid, too!
Submarines.
Eww! Showers and foxholes with short people. Yucky Yucky
He's afraid that if we let short gay people serve, they'll have that much more access to ass and that would make the tall straights nervous…sort of like an elephant in the presence of a mouse.
So just how short is Bielat?
Cue the gay-midget-sex scandal in 3, 2, 1…
Short, perhaps. But very well dressed.
I'm 5'2" and we have nothing to do with this guy.
If I spent my days being eye-level with women's chests, I wouldn't want to join the Army either.
I for one welcome our new gay midget overlords.
Overlords may not be exactly correct.
Gay midget underlords just doesn't have quite as terrifying a sound.
Rahm?
Or you can be "cured" of being height challenged.
I'm certain that theory was debunked in my favorite episode of the Brady Bunch.
Ok ladies, apparently I am now a lesbian.
Too late.
*sends LimeyLizzie macrame wall-hangings, sensible shoes & five cats*
It's not officials without pictures.
No? Not even if I say pretty please?
So, what, tall people don't have the gay? Thank zombie-Christine O'Donnell I'm six feet tall!
Short Vietnamese kicked our ass a couple decades ago and I suspect that Afghans currently kicking our ass aren't too tall, either.
The reason is; if they let Oompa Loompas serve in the military John Boehner would sign up immediately, thus depriving the republicans of one of their congressional leaders.
Without the influence of Congressional leadership the Republican party would descend into a bitter fractious party, governed more by right wing extremists, conspiracy theorists and morans rather than the being voice of bi-partisanship and cooperation it is today
A few malenky Paultard droogs caught on video getting into some of the summary:
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/10/male-r...
Holding a woman down & stomping on her head because she disagrees with you – just like the Founding Fathers intended.
Great, now the Mini division of BMW is gonna go tits up.
Dewey Cox? Is that a porn name?
Short cocksuckers have an advantage
The small in height are as gods to the small in mind, and this man needs to keep his ears plugged lest his brain tumble out.
If there are any brilliant hackers out there, this would be a good time to go after this cocksucker and check out what he whacks off to when he's alone. I suspect it might be very interesting. And I would imagine he has a preference for looking at short guys, because apparently, when he sees gay people, they're the only ones he notices.
Maybe it would work, maybe not. I think this is a noble experiment which should be tried out right away while forces are still needed in Afghanistan.
How tall is Bielat? Not that it matters, but he doesn't exactly look like a giant, himself.
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