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Antonin Scalia was spotted giving Elena Kagan “a lesson” about shootin’ crap at a shooting “club” last week, according to The Daily Caller, which has set up a tin-can telephone at the bottom of Tucker Carlson’s treehouse to receive such tips. Clarence Thomas is gonna be so pissed when he finds out his blood brother was hanging out with that new girl without him! According to eyewitnesses who had their rifle scopes trained on the liberal intruder woman, Scalia was “bending down in order to teach Kagan how to hold the shotgun,” and “the pair were shooting skeet.” Sexy! For their second date, Scalia will do Kagan’s favorite activity, recreationally aborting a fetus and then gay-marrying it to another aborted fetus.

The witnesses saw Scalia at the Fairfax Rod and Gun Club, where he is a member, around noon on Wednesday of last week. He was with a woman who was noticeably diminutive in height, like Kagan, who stands at about five feet three inches. The witnesses, who got a very close look at the pair, say that the woman was the newest Supreme Court Justice.

Sounds like someone played those Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego? computer games as a kid. They really put together those clues! High five, witnesses!

And also, what exactly is the “Rod” part of this “Fairfax Rod and Gun Club”? Is that about gun-club members going in a room and comparing dicks?

The verdict (HA! THAT’S A JUDGE THING!) here is that Obama’s Supreme Court nominees really try to go through the motions of this whole “empathy with the other side thing.” It’s just like that time Sonia Sotomayor let Clarence Thomas sexually harass her and show her weird boob porn. [Daily Caller]

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