New York Gubernatorial Orgy Focuses On 'Rent Is Too Damn High,' Hookers
America witnessed beautiful, unvarnished Democracy last night, and it was delicious. All seven mostly-insane New York gubernatorial candidates participated in a remarkably civil and friendly chitchat, and Carl Paladino didn't even say anything vaguely racist -- which is a miracle, Hallelujah et cetera. (Every time Paladino says something horrible, Satan has sex with an endangered woodland creature and then emails the sex tape to all his satanic co-workers/the media.) The star that shined the brightest last night was definitely Civil War-bearded Jimmy McMillan, of the Rent Is 2 Damn High Party. Jimmy mostly just wanted to point out that rent is too damn high, and also we think he said he is for gay marriage/shoe-marriage, as long as the rent is not too high? Gawker has videos. Kristin Davis -- the lady who sold hookers to Eliot Spitzer -- made an appearance, and she also made everyone uncomfortable with her big breasts. Click on all of these links we have gathered, so that you can learn more about this historic debate. [ Gawker / Alex Pareene / Daily Caller / Rent Is 2 Damn High Party ]
Our shadow government is angry at telecommunication megadeath companies, because all the new cellphone towers (or whatever) have created "technical obstacles" that make it difficult for shadowy government agencies to wiretap people. Not helping the government wiretap people is extremely illegal, according to this article. What? [Â NYTÂ ]
"Undecided voters who are about to settle the nation's most closely watched U.S. Senate race are facing a dilemma: They don't care for either Harry Reid or Sharron Angle." How long did it take McClatchy to realize this? Probably not as long as it took us to read that awful  New Yorker profile about Harry Reid's dullness. [ McClatchy DC ]
Tinfoil? Man...I wish I had tinfoil. Sigh. Folks like you get all the luck.
This biology professor at Liberty U., Daniel Howell, has been preaching the gospel of going barefoot for a while. Does that make him a confirmed bachelor? Or, since Liberty makes him wear shoes to class, is he in a marriage of convenience? And the biggest question: how the hell did Liberty "University" get a professor who advocates shoelessness? I have it on good authority that the students cannot leave their dorm rooms unless fully clothed, including shoes.