• May 26, 2012

New Chandra Levy Trial Hopes To Frame Illegal Immigrant

by Riley Waggaman  

Prosecutors are going to “retry” the horrible Chandra Levy murder case, and this time they are sure that they will convict Ingmar Guandique, who is from El Salvador so convict him already! This is a textbook “intern-had-sex-with-a-Congressman-and-then-was-murdered-by-an-illegal-brown-person” case, and the evidence is overwhelming:

In recent days, prosecutors further acknowledged that detectives in 2004 and 2005 wrote false pen-pal letters to Guandique in hopes he’d write back and implicate himself. Sonenberg charged Thursday that the “unethical” letters showed prosecutors feared their case “wasn’t sufficiently strong” at the time.

Prosecutors defend the tactic, which apparently was undertaken by a different law enforcement team. In 2007, D.C. Police Chief Cathy Lanier assigned a new team of detectives to the case, and they again turned their focus to Guandique.

No DNA evidence links Guandique to Levy’s skeletal remains or evidence found nearby. Instead, prosecutors are primarily relying on Guandique’s alleged confessions to fellow inmates. These confessions are both vivid and inconsistent.

Remember, jury: He’s brown.

{ 19 comments }

Lucidamente1 October 18, 2010 at 9:10 am

Wow–the most my junior high pen pal confessed to was whacking off in his uncle's tool shed.

bagofmice October 18, 2010 at 10:29 am

"Under his uncle's tool shed" is a hell of a colloquialism.

iburl October 18, 2010 at 9:16 am

So I assume the vivid and varying confessions were to other prisoners trying to bargain their way into the good graces of la migra. What ever happend to Congessman Realkiller anyway?

Katydid October 18, 2010 at 9:20 am

Everyone knows Joe Scarborough really murdered Chandra Levy. In 1993.

mookwrthwilson October 18, 2010 at 9:45 am

That guy is a one-man intern killing machine!!!

mrblifil October 18, 2010 at 12:26 pm

Well after all he's never denied killing Chandra Levy.

SexySmurf October 18, 2010 at 2:23 pm

Actually it was Glenn Beck in 1990.

GOPCrusher October 18, 2010 at 5:16 pm

I'm sticking with Joran Van Der Sloot.

WelcomeThrillho October 18, 2010 at 9:38 am

Why are we not calling this guy "the clothesline killer?"

JMPEsq October 18, 2010 at 9:48 am

Hey, similar tactics worked to get an execution for the old German immigrant who maybe had kidnapped the Lindbergh baby, or maybe not, but it doesn't matter, the important thing is getting somebody convicted, whether or not they actually had anything to do with the crime.

mumbly_joe October 18, 2010 at 10:29 am

Oh, believe me, us browns are very familiar with this sort of justice- it is, after all, the story of most of America's history. Only, used to be the case that the "conviction in a court of law" bit was itself also negotiable.

I mean, there's plenty of reason not to be nostagic for those old lynchin' days, but back then, people were at least upfront about their disdain for due process of law and love of racially-motivated scapegoating/retribution.

tribbzthesquidz October 18, 2010 at 6:30 pm

Closure, above all, is what's important. Moving on….

V572625694 October 18, 2010 at 9:58 am

He deserves to die just for having such a beautiful name. Case closed. DC police are awesome.

natoslug October 18, 2010 at 11:19 am

Yet another case of fucking illegal immigrants coming here and stealing a good American scapegoat job. I'm sick of the injustice, and will not sleep until the fence is built. Or the lawn is mowed. Either way, I'm not sleeping until lunch.

carlgt1 October 18, 2010 at 11:29 am

wouldn't it be easier to just have him ask Joe Miller a question and then handcuff him?

LionelHutzEsq October 18, 2010 at 12:39 pm

Just another case of liberal Barack Obama allowing brown people to be tried in our court system, instead of by military panels at Gitmo. Why doesn't Barack Obama want us to be safe? Why does he want to destroy America and the freedoms we hold dear?

Kidneys4Sale October 18, 2010 at 12:44 pm

Well, if we're going to loosen standards for the millitary…

tribbzthesquidz October 18, 2010 at 6:30 pm

Again, I say, the Lordt is lookin' out for Gurreh.

rickahyatt October 26, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Now is the time for a certain espionage report, made by me in 1977 and
counter-signed by my agent handler of the time, Dir. GHW Bush, and sealed for
future handling to be opened.
It was again officially sealed in 1994 at the behest of SS Agent Brian
Larkin, the Maui Prosecutor, my lawyer David Serrano, and HI Judge Komo.
Who, without reading it nor any other of a bunch of sealed documents, sent it
to the Phoenix Federal Court to be opened the 13th of this month, and a
hearing to be held on the 25th.
That particular document describes what I saw at the Condit's Ipswich flat on
July 24th, 1977, as they disposed of another "Sexual Political
Embarrassment," a gay British soldier from the Duesseldorf air base, in three
large trash bags. The soft tissue went down the toilet, the blood down the bathtub drain, and he was dismembered to death like so many others. The head and p+++++ Condit keeps for sex toys and later smashed the head & dumped it in a nearby spot.
(In other words, EVERYTHING matches with Chandra Levy's case & I had told the DC Police these MO detailss and they subsequently found her body just like this)
The details you can read at http://www.rickhyatt.freeservers.com; page down to
menulinks and "The Condit Transcript."
If you can help me contact aforesaid court officails, please have them contact me.
I am following past military orders in having kept said secret, and now seems to be the time "Make the arrow hit the target." (The Dir. knows to what I refer.)

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