- Did you take the Metro to Las Vegas last night, to watch Harry Reid and Sharron Angle fight naked in a kiddie pool full of mud? This is actually not far from the truth, metaphorically speaking, because Sharron Angle was constantly being childish and mean to poor ol’ Harry Reid. Except Harry Reid is not poor! He is rich as shit, as Sharron Angle rightly pointed out, since she is the People’s Megalomaniac. Angle also accused Harry of being a girl, and told him to “man up.” And how did Harry Reid prove to America that he is a man, and that he enjoys manly activities such as grilling anus burgers and seducing total babes with all his sexy-smelling pheromones? Uh, this is what Harry Reid did: “At one point he provided a somewhat graphic description of a colonoscopy.” Good grief. Why is Harry Reid always talking about fisting? [WaPo]
- Young people asked Barack Obama questions about the economy and gay people being allowed to die in Afghanistan during yesterday’s MTV Ideas Forum. [The Hill]
- The Tea Party will probably win a whole bunch of House and Senate seats in November, and then it will establish its own Teabagger Caucus and then goodbye, America! “You always were a headache and you always were a bore.” [NYT]
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The Harry Reid experience.
Someone had to do it.
Or Larry Craig
Needs moar pinworms.
If it was Palin, we would be talking hookworms…
Or there would be a head up there somewhere.
Yes, but that's just a Conjecture.
You the one that brought up colon cleansin'!
I find it hard to believe that anyone would vote for Angle. But, then again, I'm shocked that anyone in my state would support Rick Scott.
Yeah, I know the feeling. We have Bachmann.
Fuck off, pussies! I'm trying to survive every fucking day in the Great Sovereign State of Dumfuckistan (Georgia). Try Gingrich, Gingrey,Perdue, Chambliss, and Isaakson on for size, to say nothing of the retarded masses. You've got nothing to whine about compared to my sorry ass… Whimper!
There there. There there. Its OK. Let it out.
Is there a there there?
Thanks (sob), I needed that.
Oh yea? I've got to contend with Alan Nunnelly, Travis Childers, and Haley fucking Barbour. BEAT THAT.
Haley alone would put you over the top if we were judging based on gross tonnage, but in sheer numbers and craziness, I think I've got you.
Every time I look at the complete set of mindless asshats here in Texas I think about places where it could be worse, like Georgia.
But then I think "Texas Board of Education" and I go into a corner and weep quietly.
I forgot about them. You win. Sorry.
I feel your pain.
And I've got likely Governor mass puppy killer Bill Brady and likely Senator won the war* single-handedly Mark Kirk.
*Which war – why all of them, silly.
Same here. We just got rid of our embarrassing frothy mix of lube and fecal matter, and look to be putting his near-clone in the Senate now.
We have Ken Cuccinelli as a global-warming-denying gay-bashing-is-ok abortion-clinic-overburdening state attorney general.
Thanks for the last and greatest betrayal of the last and greatest of human dreams. Talking about thanksgiving, graphic descriptions of colonoscopies always look and sound like shit.
Pretty sure they administer a colonic before the procedure. Flushes the shit right out.
I predict that the Tea Party Caucus will be raucous. It will be a Raucous Caucus. Hilarity will ensue for all the people too.
They could change their name to the Hokus Pokus Party.
That would be the Haucus Paucus Caucus…
I'm thinking Hokey-Pokey, but it would probably be pretty repetitive, seeing as how they refuse to put anything left in, even a foot.
The Haucus Paukus Caucus
I bet there will actually be like sixty Tea Party Caucuses, because they'll be too busy accusing each other of being "impure" to actually unite.
Calling all Red Guards! Report for duty!
Let a hundred
flowerscaucuses bloom!Animal Farm meets Lord of the Flies in the Capitol. As much as I fear a GOP controlled anything, the idea of Angle trying to manage a bill on anything more complex than "Dick Durbin is a stinky pants" should be hilarious. Imagine a world in which Linda McMahon and Christine O'Donnell are in a committee hearing and forced to try and ask questions that make any sense and with no ability to go to the steel chair and/or Palin imitation fancy pageant walking. C-Span would become must watch TV.
"Imagine a world…"? Um, I've seen Michele Bachman in committee hearings, so it isn't that far out.
They'll all be able to agree on the impeachment proceedings though.
open letter to a teabagger:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdyJjQzLgxQ
that's all I got this morning.
"You shoulda warned me there was black people in the computer box!"
Shorter Angle: "Wealth is a good thing that we should encourage, unless it's the wealth of my opponent, which should be mocked".
Notice that in the above comment, I was braver than the editor and actually included a colon.
That's huge! You could drive a semi through that colon!
It's wormalicious
The mid-terms are proving to be America's colonoscopy, televised all over the world. A nasty oozing little polyp in Deleware, a supperating lesion in Nevada. And to most of us, it's pretty scary up in there! Anybody else interested in completing the metaphore, I gotta go make me some oatmeal, maybe figs and dates and shit?
Go easy on the shit. Like habaneros, a little goes a long way.
k… Thanks! I stuck with Bhut Jolokia chili seeds… hoping to unclog any horribly discolored Boehners all jammed-up… etc and so on! Man, I remember being so relieved to be proud in being an American, just a couple years ago! Investing in firearms' distributors and Chinese and Russian child-slave manufactured survival and paramilitary crap e-vendors… Now, I'm supposed to be interested in what transpires between these two disgusting assholes! One a disgusting, corrupt, insane Nazi cunt with teeth. And Angle's even worse!!!!!!
I take it the WaPo made no mention of Sharon Angle's serious case of "crazy eyes."
How can you tell anymore? Crazy is the new normal.
Although if you can diagnose the crazy, maybe we can use you to support a petition to disarm her and her followers when she loses (since even Scalia says the 2d Amendment doesn't prohibit disarming the mentally ill).
*Heart*, Harry! Let them know what is in your *heart*! Daft bugger.
Today we are all Harry Reid's colon.
You know, if our media wasn't so obsessed with (Democratic) civility, Harry could respond to man up with, "bitch I survived the mafia trying to car bomb me; man this up." And Harry would win by 25.
Yeah, and Saxby Chambliss would still be a shit eating Georgia state flunky and Max Cleeland would be in the Senate. And John Kerry would have been President – which means President Obama wouldn't have been elected until 2012 at the earliest, but maybe 10-20000 fewer dead Americans, Iraqis and Afghans.
But enough about fantasyland – Harry will just keep mushmouthing it and clinging to a quiant notion of standards and norms. Although I have been told that behind the scenes he's a nasty knife fighter, so maybe Sharron meets a horse's head up close and personal later this week.
Are you sure Harry isn't more of the cutting remark Mean Girls type?
Or the day after.
http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individ...
Sadly Angle is both the craziest teabagger and the one with the best chance of winning.
Marco Rubio and Jim "throat beard" Miller have at least as good or better of a shot, and while I don't think either of them are truly as nutty as they act for TP consumption or Angle, they are embraced by the TP crowd by and large.. Not to mention guys like Pat Toomey, who was crazy long before it became fashionable, and Ron Johnson in Wisconsin – who no one really knows.
That's what really is frightening about this – we are watching the Overton Window at work, with nuts like Angle, McMahon and O'Donnell making people like Toomey and slimes like Kirk and Johnson seem rational/normal. Not to mention corporate hacks like Fiorina and multiple time losers like Dino Rossi suddenly being competitive.
Yes, yes, yes. We are defining idiocy downwards to the point where the Michele Bachmanns and Jim DeMints will look like moderates.
Maybe if we had any semblance of media that didn't obsess over these frothing, ignorant asstards they wouldn't be doing so well. This is a moderate country, a majority of us are not represented by these guano faucets, yet; the media regards politics as a food fight, and the uglier and insaner the better. Et tu' New York Times?
I WANT MY COUNTRY BACK.
It's too bad for Angle that's she's gotten eclipsed by O'Donnell, probably because Christine marries semi-attractiveness to the crazy, even though Angle's probably the more insane of the two.
Marginal fuckability is a key factor here. Craziness comes second.
Sadly, all too true, Charles, all too true.
All I can hope for at this time is that if the t-baggers gain any kind of significant power they'll be so off the rails that folks will see them for the nutters they are.
Then I remember the movie Idiocracy and I think…we're fucked, aren't we?
I for one welcome our new granite-headed overlords.
No, wait…
Love the new avatar.
These crazy Teabagger women are obsessed with manliness. I thought good xtian women had to submit to man?
Remember that scene in Bachelor Party where the Mother of the Bride is served a real wiener in a hot dog bun and once she seizes on it she won't let go? She maniacally tugs and tugs at it while the daughter frantically tries to get her mom to drop it?
I imagine that's how Christine, Jan, Sarah, Sharon and Niki would act.
Angle told Harry Reid to "man up?" That's funny, because I've been yelling the same thing at my TV every time he's on it. "Sternly worded letters" don't get the job done, Harry. You need to channel LBJ and stop worrying about what the opposition party thinks of you. It's not about fairness, it's about taking care of the people's business. Putz!
Harry colon, harry colon
Colon, colon
Harry, harry
Thanks for your
circumcisioncircumspection Riley.I'm assuming the medical procedure was a gallant last effort to search for Sir Harry's head?
Thank god for the tea party. How else would we possibly be able to stomach the thought of actually WANTING Harry Reid to serve 6 more long fruitless and spineless years in the senate.
Too true. I used to want to see Harry shitcanned unceremoniously and beat up in an alley afterwards for good measure. Now every time I hear some pundit waxing about how "unpopular" an incumbent Harry Reid is, advancing their secret fantasy of being able to laugh at a powerful Dem for losing to a crazy lady, I find myself becoming reflexively protective of Harry, and this in turn makes me want to punch a kitten.
I pray to god that that isn't the same jock he wore back in his pugilist days. The days when, hopefully, he did man up and didn't get his ass handed to him by a crazed 'Bagger…
The good news is that a TP themed GOP is doomed to be at least or more dysfunctional than the last 2 years of Democratic control. That means they'll probably try to do a bunch of stuff that sounds good (de-fund HCR) but can't actually pull off (because it would mean forcing a shutdown of Medicaid/Medicare and suddenly the olds would be pissing on them rather than the Dems), plus Issa doing his damndest to resurrect Joe McCarthy, none of which will help in 2012.
As requested by our Wonkette, thank you so much for not making me look at an actual colon at nine in the morning.
Colonoscopies have nothing to do with checking out clowns. True fact. Had to find that one out for myself.
FUNNY HOW MOST OF THE TEA BAGGER WOMAN ARE PRO-CHOICE.
Colonoscopies are the very definition of "manning up."
After seeing a picture of Sharron Angle smiling and waving at the Camera I recalled a vivid image from my youth. She reminded me of the main character in the movie Mr. Sardoicus. Want yak now every time I t hink of her.
If you're talking about "Mr. Sardonicus," yes, that rictus grin had me and my brothers terrified for a whole summer. Not since Tom Cruise have I seen such an auto-"aint I charming?" smile.
Harry, Harry, WHY YA BUGGIN?
Harry, Harry I NEED YA HUGGIN
Hooray?
Talking about your ass is no fucking way to win a debate against an unchecked insane person talking out of their's.
More or less seriously, folks, I thought Harry looked much the worse for wear. Kind of old and washed out. Or up. Of course Harry on his worst day is better than Sharon on her best. But he did not look good.
did anyone thank you for NOT using a picture of a real colon, as you had asked? Well, thank you then.
I win except for the winning part. In this case, nobody wins.
It's exactly like that show about "The Biggest Loser," you know "The Glenn Beck Show."
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