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And now you must blow some businessman character in the Overlook Ballroom men's room.Kids, do you like the journalism? Of course not. You don’t even know what it is. But if you did, you might think it’s a respectable way to make a living. You would, of course, be wrong about that, too. Consider poor little rich boy Anderson Cooper, who actually worked hard for many years as an actual on-the-scene international war & disaster teevee reporter, and now is reduced to doing daytime talk shows for ladies and dressing up in fetish-furry gear. CLICK TO SEE ENTIRE HUMILIATING PICTURE.

The CNN personality says on his “Twitter Pix” website:

In IA for story on ape communication. The apes asked me to dress as a rabbit. Weird, huh?

“The apes asked me to dress as a rabbit,” writes Anderson Cooper, who also claims to be in Iowa. Expect to hear this excuse a lot once the 2012 primary season gets underway, which apparently happened today.

Anderson Cooper's new talk show, directed by David Lynch.

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  • SecretMuslin

    Hell, I thought he was making racist commentary about the first family. Turns out he just ate the brown acid.

  • Naked_Bunny


    • elviouslyqueer

      HAHAHA. Great (and dirty filthy sexy) minds, Bunny!

  • dogscantlookup

    “The apes asked me to dress as a rabbit,” writes Anderson Cooper
    Damn those apes, God damn you all to hell!

    • noodlesalad

      This is part of a 360 special featuring Dr. Zeus and Sarah Palin, when the Doctor convinces humanity that it really is unfit to rule earth.

      • BarackMyWorld

        Also, Cornelius and Zira want to take away our freedom.

  • Buzz Feedback

    I'm unna take him to the greyhound track.

  • BarackMyWorld

    It's a madhouse. A madhouse.

  • kenlayisalive

    I won't believe the apes are actually communicating until they get Rick Snachez to dress up like a hassidic Jew.

    • CapnFatback

      That's Rick "Baby" Snachez to you!

  • imissopus

    Tell me about the rabbits, Anderson.

    • user-of-owls

      Where did they touch you?

  • SmutBoffin

    Back when I was a wee 'un, one of the original "news for kidz" programs ran on classroom TVs at my high school. "Channel One" it was called, and featured the young and hungry (but still argentum-maned) correspondant you see above. Also , that Lisa Ling lady.

    Oh, Anderson, how far we've come. I am all growed up now and post jokes about furries on poop-blogs. And you, well, carry on with whatever it is that you do.

    (Lisa Ling is still very…narrow.)

  • SmutBoffin

    Back when I was a wee 'un, one of the original "news for kidz" programs ran on classroom TVs at my high school. "Channel One" it was called, and featured the young and hungry (but still argentum-maned) correspondant you see above. Also , that Lisa Ling lady.

  • Crank_Tango

    gross, I can almost hear all the jizz hitting the keyboards out there…

    • SmutBoffin

      (splut, splut, …*crinkling of Doritos bag*…splut, CRUNCH, CRUNCH, CRUNCH)

  • smokefilledroommate

    ♪♫ Hippity, Hoppity, Andy's on his waaaay ♫♪

  • PublicLuxury

    Next thing you know Newt Gingrich will be dressing up like a lizard. Anderson dressed as homoerotic bunny… Bunny suits today…Gay Pride tomorrow.

    • Naked_Bunny

      Why would Newt have to dress up as a reptile?

  • DoktorZoom

    Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?

  • fatoots

    “The apes asked me to dress as a rabbit,”

    Anderson, don't be naïve. Apes can't talk. They are really closeted GOP furries, and they want to gang rape you.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    Hey, when the apes say "rabbit" they aren't messing around. When they say "jump," you say "How high, sir?"

  • bfstevie

    No Anderson. POOFTAH, not POOKA.

  • axmxz

    Get your hands off him, you damn dirty apes!

  • MissTaken

    I had no idea scritching was so popular in Iowa. I hope this doesn't mean Prez-hopefuls are going to start hopping around as furries at the Iowa Corncob Fair.

    • Naked_Bunny

      Really? I think that would be awesome, watching the candidates dress in fursuits while they eat deep-fried cheese donuts and get gay married to the butter cow.

  • SudsMcKenzie

    8-27-69, … Never Forget.

  • SudsMcKenzie

    Now were talking some Cocktober!1

  • JMPEsq

    Only Jimmy Stewart can see Anderson now.

  • V572625694

    Remember when Coop used to be on that game show? Here it is:

    I don't see any inconsistency here.

    • Extemporanus

      I agree.

      It's only natural for a silver fox to show an interest in moles and hares, just as it's only natural for a bear to show an interest in him.

  • PocketsTheClown


    jesus this is frustrating.

  • Fare la Volpe

    Unf, I would show Coop how far down the rabbit hole goes anyday.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Welcome to Anderson Cooper Investigates: What Happens on Watership Down Stays on Watership Down. We'll be right back after these messages.

  • DCHatesMe

    Like most americans, I never watch his show. Is this different for him?

  • nounverb911

    Anderson Cooper by Diane Arbus

  • MiniMencken

    So sad. Mein Name ist Hase. Das Dritte Reich reference. Passive-aggresive response.

  • Qatarded

    And when the ape regained consciousness, he asked "Where is that magnificent bunny?"

  • Extemporanus

    The confused Anderson Cooper is a Shep in Wolf's clothing.

  • wok3

    Well the news is a yiff-fest anyways, but it is weird that you can see his face. Talk about a furry fauz pas!

    • Naked_Bunny

      You'd think CNN would have better fursuits on hand. (Or paw.)

      Perhaps they had to hide them from Larry King.

      • Terry

        The apes provided the bunny suit. They bought it online.

    • PsycWench

      the visible face is part of his fursona.

  • spooked911

    One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small, but the ones that mother gives you, don't do anything at all…

  • chicken_thief

    What the hell's with that over-sized super-duper deodorized Maxi-pad (with adhering wings)? Just how big is AC's mangina?!

  • Naked_Bunny

    It's bad enough how the right wing orders around the mainstream media, but now a bunch of caged, naked apes are calling the shots? This is why I now only get my news from reliable sources like Wonkette and chain emails.

  • mrblifil

    I think the apes were trying to make some sort of statement about the inheritance tax.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Clearly, AC is re-enacting his favorite scene from that science fiction classic of yesteryear Night of the Lepus.

  • Redhead

    "But if you did, you might think it’s a respectable way to make a living. You would, of course, be wrong about that, too."

    When I was in college, I was a visual arts major and wanted to paint paintings for a living. My dad gave me one semester, and then told me I had to get a real major and a real job 'cause he wasn't supporting me the rest of my life. So I got into journalism.


    • Terry

      Too bad your mother didn't start a craze for too tight jeans a couple decades back. An uber-rich industrialist grandfather might have helped, too.

      • HistoriCat

        Yeah – real Americans know that inheritance is the best way to make money. Future WV Senator Raese told me so.

    • Katydid

      I was majoring in Art History (I wanted to become a curator), but became a journalist instead. My father's reaction? "Congratulations, you just picked the second lowest-paying career." I was pissed, but he was right in ways he didn't even know about.

      He was much relieved when I later switched to IT.

      • Redhead

        Yeah, my first job paid about as much as McDonald's. (Did I mention I got into PRINT journalism? Ahh, the optimism of youth…)
        My dad has a long list of things he'd love me to switch to that would pay more. It's sad…

  • Oppenheiner

    Katty Kay doesn't have to resort to this. Although on second thought, I kind of wish she would.

  • ttommyunger

    Anderson also falls for the old "Just hold it between your teeth until the swelling goes down" trick too… Repeatedly.

  • Troubledog


  • user-of-owls

    What a macaca.

  • Sheesko

    I don't know, kids. This guy is just so darn cute and sensitive and all, plus, you know, rich. He makes me want to get a sex-change operation and then choose to be gay.

  • easynewz

    I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them….

  • Gleem_McShineys

    I think the ape really said "wear a wetsuit and shove two dildos in your ass" and Anderson thought the 2 fingers bouncing up and down could only mean "bunny"

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