Congressional Candidate Plans Out Private Birth Certificate Viewing
Look, Michigan Congressional candidate Tim Walberg will take President Obama "at his word" that he's an American citizen. But that doesn't mean Obama can't have some fun with his birth certificate! Walberg is just thinking out loud here, but Obama should probably invite "Rush Limbaugh, Alan Colmes, Nancy Pelosi, Mitch McConnell, and maybe one justice of the U.S. Supreme Court" to his house and just lay it out there for them to admire. That seems like the precise roster of people who hold the most power in the United States government, so why doesn't Obama take this Walberg fellow's advice and hold this nice little birth certificate get-together? Otherwise, this guy WILL impeach you, even though he believes you are an American citizen.
We'll even help you out, sir. Let's expand on this party list.
Other guests:
Albert Haynesworth
The dogs from the Shiba Inu Puppy Cam
Walter Mondale
The cast of The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
Walter Mondale's wife
Harriet Miers
Dog the Bounty Hunter
Food and refreshments:
White wine
Pizza-flavored Combos
Fanta (various flavors)
Cake with an edible photo of the birth certificate on top
Other:
Strobe light, to be pointed at the birth certificate
If you have all of these things, you can put this issue to rest, Obama. But only if you do them all. [ Think Progress ]
And if that doctor is dead, which might well be for a physican practicing in 1961, this will mean that Obama paid a hit man to keep the doctor from blabbing that he didn't sign the certificate after all, or was paid to do so.
One of my high school teachers once joked he got pulled over all the time for "being a n***** on a sunny day," so there's precedent.
(Yes, I really had black high school teachers, you racists.)