PISSING CONTESTS  1:35 pm October 7, 2010

Rand Paul, Jack Conway Meet At Kentucky Urinal

by Jack Stuef

Just look straight ahead. No problem. I can pee here. Nobody's looking. No reason to be shy.
The great thing about this country is its diverse character. Some states have their Senate candidates debate at podiums. Others have them debate at urinals.

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Hola wonkerados.

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GuyClinch October 7, 2010 at 1:39 pm

They both agree on one thing: Golden showers.

SexySmurf October 7, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Rand thinks all showers should be on the gold standard.

axmxz October 8, 2010 at 5:29 pm


Dr_pangloss October 7, 2010 at 1:42 pm

They both have that "don't look at the other guys dick, Dont Look!" look you get at the urinal.

neiltheblaze October 7, 2010 at 1:54 pm

I'll betcha Rand took a peek though.

Steverino247 October 7, 2010 at 2:45 pm

It's ok, he's a doctor.

Ducksworthy October 7, 2010 at 3:59 pm

That's true and his Board Certification for the Rand Paul Certifying Board authorizes him to taste dicks to see if they're healthy.

RunnyRose October 7, 2010 at 1:50 pm

What you can't see is that they're both reading an ad for "D.U.I. Mike" that's on the wall in front of them.

SayItWithWookies October 7, 2010 at 1:53 pm

Never trust a man who can't write his name in the snow.
– Kentucky proverb

Lucidamente1 October 7, 2010 at 2:04 pm

When the government forces men to use public urinals, it takes away a fundamental right to go wherever they please. It says so right there in the Federalist Papers.

freakishlywrong October 7, 2010 at 2:04 pm

I don't have one of those things, but if I did, that perfectly encapsulates what I think the menz look like whilst tinkling. AWKWARD BITCHES!

Gopherit October 7, 2010 at 2:08 pm

Don't cross the streams. It could cause a total protonic reversal. Also, it would be kind of gay.

Kidneys4Sale October 7, 2010 at 2:15 pm

Jack Conway is clearly a better man than Rand Paul, but I can't help but suspect that neither of them would think twice before walking up to the urinal on your right and starting a conversation with the guy to your left.

JMPEsq October 7, 2010 at 2:18 pm

There's space to Rand's left; he doesn't seem to know the basic rule that you keep at least one urinal between you and the next guy as long as there's room.

GeneralLerong October 7, 2010 at 3:08 pm

Blingee has some interesting motifs. Obviously we should all go there more often. I mean, visit there.

HOFAH October 7, 2010 at 3:36 pm

Can the good people of KY elect Jack Conway to the Senate, so us womenfolk have someone to look at on C-SPAN? You fellas have Kirsten Gillibrand (or at least Harry Reid does).

Fair's fair

SecretMuslin October 7, 2010 at 9:20 pm

Bonus 100 thumbs up for you.

doxastic October 7, 2010 at 5:24 pm

It's to hide Rand's short-pants

lochnessmonster October 7, 2010 at 5:44 pm

Hahaha, Thank you.

CapnFatback October 7, 2010 at 6:43 pm

First one to melt the ice becomes a U.S. senator!

GOPCrusher October 8, 2010 at 4:13 pm

It's Kentucky. They're trying to break up the cigarette butts.

transfatz October 7, 2010 at 7:00 pm

Debate over.
The abstracted, lantern jawed "I'm not shaking it" look wins hands down.

cymchikster October 7, 2010 at 7:39 pm

That men's room sure has a strict dress code.

PrezCamacho October 7, 2010 at 11:46 pm

They were using the test-and-true wide stance method. <Patent Pending by Mr. Larry Craig>

BruceMajor October 8, 2010 at 6:42 am

Poor Demwits, Wonkers and pro-regressives. All your candidates going down in flames and so you must huddle together and tell bathroom jokes.

Maybe Letterman will give you a joke about raping Rand Paul's children so you can all chortle in your little swamps and caves.

Scream racism some more. Or tell everyone who thinks your tired old Keynesian notions were refuted long ago that they are stupid. That's worked for you bright bulbs so well this year.


kenlayisalive October 8, 2010 at 6:12 pm

You can write us back and brag when we have a celibate witch in the Senate, you stupid prick. But until then, shut the fuck up.

EatsBabyDingos October 8, 2010 at 5:04 pm

AquaBuddha blow jobs.

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