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Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • GuyClinch

    They both agree on one thing: Golden showers.

    • SexySmurf

      Rand thinks all showers should be on the gold standard.

      • axmxz

        Win.

  • http://www.wonkette.com Dr_pangloss

    They both have that "don't look at the other guys dick, Dont Look!" look you get at the urinal.

    • neiltheblaze

      I'll betcha Rand took a peek though.

      • Steverino247

        It's ok, he's a doctor.

        • Ducksworthy

          That's true and his Board Certification for the Rand Paul Certifying Board authorizes him to taste dicks to see if they're healthy.

  • http://www.wonkette.com RunnyRose

    What you can't see is that they're both reading an ad for "D.U.I. Mike" that's on the wall in front of them.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Never trust a man who can't write his name in the snow.
    — Kentucky proverb

  • Lucidamente1

    When the government forces men to use public urinals, it takes away a fundamental right to go wherever they please. It says so right there in the Federalist Papers.

  • freakishlywrong

    I don't have one of those things, but if I did, that perfectly encapsulates what I think the menz look like whilst tinkling. AWKWARD BITCHES!

  • Gopherit

    Don't cross the streams. It could cause a total protonic reversal. Also, it would be kind of gay.

  • Kidneys4Sale

    Jack Conway is clearly a better man than Rand Paul, but I can't help but suspect that neither of them would think twice before walking up to the urinal on your right and starting a conversation with the guy to your left.

  • JMPEsq

    There's space to Rand's left; he doesn't seem to know the basic rule that you keep at least one urinal between you and the next guy as long as there's room.

  • GeneralLerong

    Blingee has some interesting motifs. Obviously we should all go there more often. I mean, visit there.

  • HOFAH

    Can the good people of KY elect Jack Conway to the Senate, so us womenfolk have someone to look at on C-SPAN? You fellas have Kirsten Gillibrand (or at least Harry Reid does).

    Fair's fair

    • SecretMuslin

      Bonus 100 thumbs up for you.

  • doxastic

    It's to hide Rand's short-pants

  • lochnessmonster

    Hahaha, Thank you.

  • CapnFatback

    First one to melt the ice becomes a U.S. senator!

    • GOPCrusher

      It's Kentucky. They're trying to break up the cigarette butts.

  • transfatz

    Debate over.
    The abstracted, lantern jawed "I'm not shaking it" look wins hands down.

  • cymchikster

    That men's room sure has a strict dress code.

  • PrezCamacho

    They were using the test-and-true wide stance method. <Patent Pending by Mr. Larry Craig>

  • BruceMajor

    Poor Demwits, Wonkers and pro-regressives. All your candidates going down in flames and so you must huddle together and tell bathroom jokes.

    Maybe Letterman will give you a joke about raping Rand Paul's children so you can all chortle in your little swamps and caves.

    Scream racism some more. Or tell everyone who thinks your tired old Keynesian notions were refuted long ago that they are stupid. That's worked for you bright bulbs so well this year.

    Lol.

    • http://www.kenlayisalive.org kenlayisalive

      You can write us back and brag when we have a celibate witch in the Senate, you stupid prick. But until then, shut the fuck up.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    AquaBuddha blow jobs.