Remember when Levi Johnston went and made some dumb music video? Of course you do, because this fact is important to your survival as a living being on Earth. Well, now this music video is available on an Internet box, so you can watch Levi Johnston humping some 50-year-old woman who is supposed to be Bristol Palin while some 52-year-old woman who is supposed to be Sarah Palin looks on in hatred. Will you watch this video? Yes, you will. You don’t want to get eaten by a cheetah. You have to watch this dumb video. It’s what separates us from the beasts.
“Did we do a good job, terrible 50-year-old singer lady?”
“Yes, acting.” [Mediaite]
{ 88 comments }
Nihilism is looking better all the time . . .
OK so what level of celebrity are we down to here? F-list? G-list? What a waste of electrons. The video not Wonkette so much. And what, pray tell, is a Brittani Senser?
Just threw up in my own mouth.
This is better than someone else throwing up in your mouth. Please don't ask me how I know this.
Consensual emesis?
New Yorking?
OK, if you don't ask me how I know it's better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Levi is the new Warren Beatty. Or the new Ned Beatty.
Hillbilly: I bet you can squeal like a pig. Weeeeeeee!
Bobby: Weee!
Hillbilly: Weeeeeeee!
Bobby: Weee!
It looked like Levi enjoyed that scene where the cop bent him over the car.
Weeeeeee!, indeed.
Mountain Man: What do you want to do now?
Toothless Man: [grinning] He got a real pretty mouth ain't he?
Mountain Man: That's the truth
Toothless Man: [to Ed] You gonna do some prayin' for me, boy. And you better pray good.
Will Lawrence O'Donnell have him back on for a follow-up interview?
They let Amy Winehouse out of rehab just for this video?
needs more ladyboyjuice
Next up: Buttsecks w/Hootie.
He most definitely should be mayor of Wasilla. The acting career might not work out.
Chris Isaak scoffs at this piece of shit. At least he got to frolic on the beach with Helena Christensen not Levi Johnson.
The warranty on Brittani Senser's fake bake was about to expire, so she brought in a specialist to impregnate her career.
Bargain-basement Mandingo.
I watched the video and I'm glad I did.
Otherwise there would be a 0% chance that I'd ever know that there is someone in this world whose name is "Paffrath." Which is kind of awesome.
She's cute!
That's about as hot as a 2 day old burnt match.
Not watching the video…not watching the video
Agreed. I would like to find the human form attractive in my future.
I did the obligatory 14 seconds, with no audio of course.
tp;dw
(too putrid, didn't watch)
Aw fuck…I watched it. Didn't listen though. Quick question. Is this autobiographical for Levi? The Wasilla cop hood slams Levi so Sarah (played by whoever the singer is) hands him the results from the Bristol's paternity test?
If it were more true to life, Sarah would have made Levi do her in the back of the Police cruiser.
This video is just unbelievable. The image of Levi making love to a sinewy grandmother type of lady flies in the face of the fact that he prefers his women young and plump. We have his love child to prove it folks.
I'm waiting for the Scratch 'n Sniff version.
If Levi had made the video before having Bristol, then he wouldn't have made Tripp.
The unrated version of the video includes a super hawt sex scene where Levi Johnston and Tank Jones double-team Brittani Senser's wet, gaping nostrils.
Bitch won't do anal, but she'll do nasal.
Nose fucker
Will she do aural?
What did you say? Sorry. Couldn't hear you with this cock stuck in my ear.
Why does Levi have his name tattooed on his arm? Does he have trouble remembering it.
Less expensive than getting him chipped.
alt text fail
good taste fail (but has that mattered in the last 25 years?)
Well I got disgusted after about ten seconds — when you need a dramatic intro for exposition to your music video, you have failed as an artist. But then when your life is a side plot to The Beverly Hillbillies Meet the House of Atreus, that's pretty much a foregone conclusion. I'm gonna watch that horrible PETA video now and cleanse my palate.
" side plot to The Beverly Hillbillies Meet the House of Atreus" I bow down before your awesomeness!
So awesomely awesome I may need to steal it.
If he becomes Mayor of Wasilla, I think he should make a deal with the cruise ships that go to Alaska. They should bus 50 year and older tourists to a bar in Wasilla and, on the bar, he , Levi, will hump a woman, the two of them on a sofa. (Or a man, for "special" cruises.) In this way, with the Cruise ships kicking in money, Wasilla will become a wealthy village or town or whatever the **** it is. And the tourists will have a relief from having to look at glaciers.
I told my children, many years ago, that if must "suffer children who sing, I will suffer children who sing well."
She's just horrible. It's so bad, I'm not even watching the sexytime…
It is amazing the way they captured Chris Isaak's original vision for Wicked Game.
Are we supposed to believe that Levi has had sex someplace other than on the bench seat of his pickup truck or on Sarah Palin's tv room sofa?
I don't think Christine O'Donnell would approve of the way that woman keeps touching herself.
Video is blocked at work, but …is that Charo?
Needs more than just cheek kissing (can't get pregnant that way.) And high windows that look suspiciously like the Wasilla Sports Complex.
Holy shit, now I understand why she looks so harsh. Her dad used to play football for the Vikings.
Needs a "Cleveland Steamer" to tie the story together.
Odd, I would have thought the plot for an "After Love" video with Levi would have revolved around a trip to the free clinic.
When Levi Johnston’s acting is the best part of the video you know you have laid one stinkin’ turd.
Needs moar dicks in a box.
Three words: Tactical nuclear weapon (TNW)
The Johnstons and Palins must live with 10 miles of each other. We can end all this quickly and precisely. Neilist back me up on this.
I think I'll go watch something on YouPorn instead and pretend it was this.
Is there a dirty sanchez finale ? If not, I aint watching it.
Looks like she is on the Michael Jackson quest for the perfect nose.
Note: having to wear a plastic nose when all you have left are a couple of holes in your face is one outcome of this quest.
NANA, WHY?!?
Ms. Senser, you're trying to seduce me. Aren't you?
I have to say, I can't think of any family group that has done more to pollute our collective unconscious more that the Palins/Johnson tribe.
There's no fucking way that woman is 26.
It's very possible that this is the result of way too much time in a tanning bed or on a beach. As a native of the NC shore, I have seen a lot of sexy tans on teenagers start looking leathery in one's 20's, and being so skinny doesn't help either.
Thank god I'm just a baby–I don't want to look like that. I guess I should stop smoking, however.
He's no Kevin Federline….
Apparently she is 24. I never would have guessed under 30. http://www.celebuzz.com/who-brittani-senser-weve-...
Too much sun ages the face rapidly. SPF for great beauty.
It looks like she's had a lot of work done. The skin on her face is so taut she looks like a desperate housewife. I wish women under 40-ish would have the good sense to limit themselves to nose jobs and the occasional breast augmentation. Jesus christ.
Umm, so Gramma's home health care nurse had Levi Johnston arrested for,what? Is it illegal to sex your own Gramma? Oh I guess it is.
Contrary to the media inspired myth, Levi does not have his name "Johnston" tattooed on his forearm. Come 'on folks! He's a functional illiterate. He has a picture of a Johnston tattooed on his forearm.
Other than correcting that urban legend, the video was so bad I threw up a little in a perfect stranger's mouth.
So – the police can stop you for making a terrible "music" video? And why is it so long? Makes Anna Karenina seem like a comic strip. "All snowbilly families are disgraceful in their own way."
It's all very Telemundo soap opera-y. Which is appropriate.
I'm pretty sure this video proves we are below the beasts.
Brittani Senser is her porno actress name. Her birth name is Tiffany-Pérignon Mustang Heath and… OMFG!.. she's Bristol's cousin!
Needs moar abortions, also.
They missed out not hiring this actress to portray Sarah: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x34G0h7R__Y
Oh God I can't wait to see what the genius behind Johnston Checks In (http://www.somethingawful.com/d/levi-johnston/) does with this.
Wikipedia says this chick is 26 but damn, she looks a lot older.
Please don't ever make me watch anything like that again
After watching this video, in the future I intend to reproduce by dividing myself, like an amoeba, or by sending out shoots.
A little late to the game, but this made me laugh so hard I started crying and had to run to the ladies room. I suspect my cube neighbors believe I just received awful news. I'll go with that to prevent a writeup.
Thank you for threatening my livelihood with your fabulous comment.
Haha, in which case, I can only hope you're a lady. Thanks!
That's not rain. That's my semen.
oh come ON. this sucked ass but that chick is soooooo much hotter than any X chromosome that ever reared it's grifter head in wasilla.
you can't blame a lad for playing along.
yikes. WTF???
So Bristol and Sarah are Messicans? Who knew they got that far north.
I don't object that the piano part is played entirely with the right hand, I object to the rationale behind why the left hand was unavailable at the time.
I would say Levi is the new Stephen Baldwin, as in has no talent.
Crappy song, crappy video, crappy people.
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