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What’s going on in the world of business? Let’s check our Bloomberg terminal front page! Hmm, stocks crashing, world economy abandoning useless U.S.A., blah blah earnings and unemployment and doom, “Experimental Sex Practiced More Often By Americans.” Wha?!

About 85 percent of men reported in a study that their partner had an orgasm during their most recent sexual event. The number dropped to 64 percent when women were asked whether they reached climax their last time.

Haha, men are idiots.

About 40 percent of women ages 20 to 49 and of men ages 25 to 59 have had anal sex, the study found. More than 80 percent of women aged 20 through 49, and over 85 percent of men the same age had received oral sex, the study found.

Also, more than 80% of oral and anal sex encounters are “accidental” because people are so fat that it’s basically “any port in a storm.” [Bloomberg]

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