An Alaska judge has granted Sarah Palin a restraining order against 18-year-old Shawn R. Christy, a guy from Pennsylvania who likes to call and write her and talk about his shotgun. “He had sent her a letter with the proof of a gun purchase, claimed to have had an affair with Palin and wrote, in letters of up to 10 pages long, that ‘he is trying to follow God but has evil in him, and that he is going to sell everything and come to Alaska with his shotgun,’ according to the court order.” Oh, c’mon, isn’t that what everyone says when they move to Alaska?
Palin testified by telephone that she feared for her life, and for her family’s safety: “Bottom line is, he is crazy and could kill me,” Palin said, according to the court transcript. “He wants me dead.”
Well, yes, many people do. But even if she is killed, she will probably still pop up on the news each and every day. And Team Sarah will see to it she is elected president posthumously.
Palin also testified that he also believes he has some kind of relationship with her daughter, Willow, and has brought up the girl’s name.
WILLOW DID THIS? We always knew that one was off. Why doesn’t she whore herself out for the limelight like all the others?
Teenage boys should really be stalking girls their own age, not grandmother Fox News personalities. Don’t take Sarah away from us, man. We need her.
But what did Team Sarah have to say about it? Here’s our pal Simon Roth:
Absolutely horrible. Unfortunately left-wingers, because they generally lack moral restraint, are more driven to go through with calculated acts like this than conservative nut-jobs are.
The name Lee Harvey Oswald comes to mind.
[AP/Team Sarah]
{ 146 comments }
Why does Sarah Palin fear this brave patriot with his legally purchased gun and constitutionally protected free speech?
What a bitch.
The poor kid, he's just following her instructions, he's locked and loaded, he has put a target on her, and he's using those precious second amendment rights, that precious liberty our brave troops are fightin' and dyin' to protect for us now up in here too, also, and now Sarah is takin' away his precious liberty, usin' one of them legislatin' from the bench liberal judges to pry his precious second-amendment rights from his hot, live hands?
And if she was a real mama grizzly she would just tear him apart him with her bare hands, not whine to some activist librul judge. I'm so disappointed I'm gonna cry.
He's just using the second amendment option to deal with the girl he likes refusing to go out with him. With votes!
He's after her because Sarah is a Mooslim
If she took out a restraining order against everyone who wished her dead, 3/4ths the planet would have to have one. Oh, and Simon Roth?- go fuck yourself, you lying shitsack.
Yes left wingers lack moral restraint. That explains all our plots to overthrow government with armed rebellion and killing cops and crashing planes into IRS buildings.
Wait a minute…
I need a conservative catchphrase dictionary. My liberal one is broken, as I do not see a definition for moral restraint that includes letting your teen daughter and her boyfriend have a fuck room or using your kids as props to sell some bullshit narrative about the importance of family.
Indeed, the cat who crashed the plane into the IRS building in Austin was a far left radical. A communist, like Obama.
In fact, MOST violent radicals in this country are left wing loon. Every heard of Bill Ayers and his cop murdering wife Bernardine Dorhn? They killed and maimed hundreds. This guy is one of Obama's closest mentors, BTW.
Lee Harvey Oswald was a left winger, a communist.
Sirhan Sirhan, a left winger and a Muslim.
James Earl Ray was a democrat KKK terrorist who slaughter Dr Martin Luther King Jr, who was a Republican.
Of course, the KKK itself was founded right after the civil war as a domestic terrorism arm of the democrat party. They were specifically charged with terrorizing Republicans, which of course included Blacks, because most, if not all Blacks were Republicans.
Then we have one of the worst terrorists in world history, Margret Sanger, who was also a Klanner.
Margret Sanger pushed for legal abortions because she believed in eugenics and saw abortion as a way to eliminate the Black race, who she called "human weeds."
Of course democrats LOVE abortion, and winning the award named after the KKKer is a high honor.
Over 100 million babies have been slaughter in America alone thanks to Sanger and the democrats. Half of them Black. Sanger's wish to eliminate the Black race is right on schedule.
BTW, this doesn't count Josef Mengele's "experiments" and the Holocaust, which were inspired by the writings of Sanger and other "progressives."
As evidenced by the diseased minds writing comments here on this site about Palin, democrats are nothing more than sick, diseased, morally bankrupt animals that should be put down like rabid dogs.
The world would be a safer place, a better place if this were to happen.
Awww…you're funny!
Simon Roth: Why stop at LHO you sick bastard? John Wilkes Booth: LIBRUL! (Shot Lincoln cause he didn't free the slaves FAST ENOUGH.)
What left wingers lack in restraint, they make up for in accuracy.
"… he has evil in him," AKA Gentleman's Relish.
I won't sign up for Team Sarah, so I have to ask…
Absolutely horrible. Unfortunately left-wingers, because they generally lack moral restraint, are more driven to go through with calculated acts like this than conservative nut-jobs are.
The name Lee Harvey Oswald comes to mind.
Did he really say that? What a douche.
Augusto Pinoche also. Known communist.
"Teenage boys should really be stalking girls their own age, not grandmother Fox News personalities."
I dunno, it's no big deal. I've had a thing for older women ever since I saw The Graduate in the theater at age 9 (Thanks, Dad!!). Of course, them older women are now my age or younger, and cougaring out with kids 25 years my junior.
If all the women your age are out cougaring it up, why not aim for the GILF crowd?
Should have been watching Harold and Maude instead of The Graduate.
P.S. I realized that for some people Sarah Palin counts due to her grandmother status. But I'm talking about non-trailer trash types who wait to get knocked up until after they're allowed to get drunk.
"Oh, Gladys, your eyes are like limpid pools, and your skin is like crepe paper."
I find it amusing that your Dad took you to see it. That was a lot of, ummm, information for a 9 year old boy brain.
Remember, though, it's okay to wear a sidearm when the president visits your town.
Do the NRA and Sharron Angle know that the former half term governator opposes second amendment remedies?
If Palin's elected President forget your career in the TV business, because this dope and her family will be about to provide at least 100 channels of non stop train-wreck grade entertainment 24 hours a day.
Oh please, please, please. Can one channels be be "Lil' Tater's Playhouse" complete with TardCam? Puhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhleeeeease.
They'd have to license TardCam technology from 2 and a half Men, which will likely be expensive.
And Team Sarah will see to it she is elected president posthumously.
Only if she was running against John Ashcroft.
If those were my choices it would be a near thing to cross the Canuckistan border before I could eat my gun.
“Bottom line is, he is crazy and could kill me,” Palin said, according to the court transcript. “He wants me dead.”
The lowest of low hanging fruit.
“He wants me dead.”
OK then, how about no talking instead?
Hi there Simon Roth! You're totally right, that democratically elected Salvador Allende fellow certainly did have it coming by the left-wing zealots who knocked him off. Right?
It's very regrettable that Mossadegh (Iran… 1953…) was himself taken out by those pinkos who just can't restrain their impulses to violence! Right?
It's a great thing we resisted the leftist urge to just keep on fighting the good fight in Indo-China a few years back! And it's a damned fine thing we didn't listen to the voices of reason on the right who would have prevented those bloodthirsty leftistos from the Righteous Invasion of Iraq! Right?
good god man! these things are not in kentucky. you don't seriously expect a palin fan to understand or care about them do you?
Were I an Alaskan wolf, I'd take out a restraining order against her.
OK, which of you guys wrote that letter? I'm thinking it was shorts.
I miss Shorts-to-the-third-power…
Inre this fine coment: And that is how we do that.
David Kernell, Shawn Christy… why does this cougar hate college boys?
“Bottom line is, he is crazy and could kill me,”
By her standards I guess he is a little crazy. He should be knocking up her underage daughter. That's the norm in Wasilla.
Personally, I'd like to see universal restraining orders issued anytime someone purchases a gun.
Hey now! Some of us lefties are heavily-armed. Although I've never shot anything other than targets, and currently only keep my rifles in case something attacks my flock of girlfr- er, sheep.
I had an apartment between two gun-toting leftists once. It ended badly.
True story: John Wilkes Booth? Total commie jew-fag.
"You go into some of these small towns in Pennsylvania.., the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing’s replaced them…. So it’s not surprising then that they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion"
vs.
" Shawn R. Christy, a guy from Pennsylvania…wrote, in letters of up to 10 pages long, that ‘he is trying to follow God but has evil in him, and that he is going to sell everything and come to Alaska with his shotgun"
When the Ivy League darkie say it, it be elitest. When a God fearin' Walmart Mom says it, it is plain common sense.
Snowbilly is just a paper grizzly.
And James Earl Ray. And the guy who killed the guard at the holocaust museum.
Palin better tread lightly here, otherwise she's liable to alienate her batshit crazy jesus freak supporters. In other words, just about all of her supporters.
Note to Sarah-All your fans are armed and crazy and could kill you. I suggest you worry most about those who are feverishly masturbating on your books while holding firearms in their free hands. Probably no more that 500-1,000 of them are really really dangerous to you personally. And only because of the evil you make them do.
Ducksworthy, you are one sick, lying bastard.
"he is going to sell everything and come to Alaska"
Fuck, the guy is 18. How much shit can he have to sell, especially if he's gonna keep his shotgun? He might make it to Omaha.
It's the Teabagger version of "Into the Wild."
Grizzly Bears will eat him!
(middle-aged teabag women will give him oral).
So..crazy, bible thumping, Palin obsessed, gun totin', Xtian. Sounds like her base.
Now Palin knows how we feel when contemplating her base.
Don't forget noted commies Sirhan Sirhan and James Earl Ray. Not to mention politically motivated shooters like Mark David Chapman, John Hinckley (who was told to kill Ronnie by Russian agent Jody Foster), and Squeeky Fromme.
Osama bin Laden is plainly a swishy, quiche-eating lefty.
sarah pandora had a pretty box.
she opened it up and out flew flocks
of bat-shit crazies she couldn't control–
the price she paid for selling her soul.
Poesy precision!
nice, but as a frequenter of workshops, I gotta say, you're better than that last line. A bit cliché.
Using Palin "logic", the fact she is supposedly afraid enough of this guy to file a restraining order merely means he is correct and a good person.
Here's the real question: If criticizing someone for incredibly hateful racism is "taking away their First-Amendment rights", then isn't petitioning for a restraining order against some deranged stalker with a shotgun LITERALLY taking away their Second Amendment rights? And First? ALSO?
God, Sarah Palin is such a fucking liberal commiefascist, taking away our shotguns, just like Hitler and the King of England, combined. OUT OF OUR COLD DEAD HANDS, Sarah.
Can the lower 48 get a restraining order against her? I consider her behavior and communications with us to be harrassment. The voice alone, thats fucking harrassment.
Along with Eric Rudolph, and the guy who killed Dr. Tiller.
And remember, David Koresh was a martyr murdered by BIGGOVERNMENT because they want to take our guns away! He just wanted to peacefully exercise his second amendment rights to stockpile enough artillery for a small army. Oh, and rape children.
And was Jim Jones and agnostic? I think not.
No, but Jim Jones did try to create a "socialist paradise" [sic] in Jonestown.
All because of being a failed monkey salesman.
What a waste.
What, was the Twitter down or something?
Also: You can testify by fucking telephone?!
No, YOU can't. Sarah Palin can, because the laws are different for special people.
No, but really, I could swear that the right of the accused to face their accuser was sort of a big deal in our legal system, even in Obama's America? What gives?
I guess the right of the accused to face their accuser was outweighed by the right of the accused to be spared cruel and unusual punishment.
For restraining orders, yes, you can testify by telephone. You can likely testify by telephone for a lot of other things. "Facing" your accuser is not literal, it just means you can question them to prevent hearsay.
Also, stalking orders/restraining orders are usually issued without the other side present. They are only present when they contest the order.
The more you know!
He is feverishly wanking out the evil (consisting of lewd thoughts of Palin) in between firing his 12 gauge into the closet.
Hey, no fair peeking! Now I've got to find that hidden Wonkette camera.
DON'T RETREAT…RESTRAIN!
So talking like a Bible-thumping schizo and invoking guns at every turn brings out crazy gun-obsessed religious freaks? There might be some causal link here, but we shouldn't rush to conclusions. It could be as elusive as that tricky cancer-and-smoking thing that's had science stumped for the last hundred years.
It's only a theory – like gravity or evolution.
Dealing with a crazed stalker type is the one situation where I can almost feel some sympathy for the snowbilly; but then her spokesman goes and destroys that by asserting that this Mark Chapman-style obsessed crazy must be liberal for some reason, just like Oswald (huh??) and it's all liberals' fault. Thanks Simon, I guess.
One Neilist is entirely enough, thank you very much.
Why does she hate the Second Amendment?
And the First Amendment too for that matter?
OMG, SHE HATES THE CONSTITUTION !
Don't forget that guy who ambushed and killed three cops at his home outside of Pittsburgh because they were going to take his guns away — total liberal lack of restraint right there.
That one was a Becktard if I am not mistaken.
Nice Bible quote in the graphic. Here's another one for ya' Sarah: "As ye sow, so shall ye reap." Or something like that.
Embrace him Sarah, he is your base.
Yes, that's right. Everyone remembers Bernie Goetz, famous left-wing nutjob.
These tea baggers say anything they want nowadays, left is right, Nazism was really a left wing phenomenon, just draw it on a chalkboard and it becomes Fox News fact.
Clearly now schizophrenia is really a leftist thing, and soon that will be a standard talking point. (true right wingers don't have any mental or genetic illness, nor Down's syndrome, oh, wait).
But but but…what if god told Christ-y to do it? Why does Sarah Palin hate god? God wants us to buy shot guns. Says so in the 2nd Amendment.
Oh, c’mon, isn’t that what everyone says when they move to Alaska?
Actually, I think the standard phrasing is "Bench warrant? I'm outta here!"
That's not just a shotgun Sarah, it's a veritable instantiation of the sacred Second Amendment.
Aren't you supposed to get on your knees and worship it?
"instantiation"?
Plato? C++ ?
Christine Cristy will be my Governor's name after he loses 10 thousand pounds and has the surgery.
"Unfortunately left-wingers, because they generally lack moral restraint, are more driven to go through with calculated acts like this than conservative nut-jobs are. "
Uh….wow.
Congratulations, Simon Roth, you have officially bottomed-out our political discourse.
I don't think it can possibly get any lower than just flat-out saying that an entire class of political opponents are, personally, depraved and evil criminals.
That's the sort of shit you're just supposed to dog whistle, and let the minions blubber to their pals. You don't say it out loud.
Team Sarah must have libdar. How else could they know that sister Sarah's stalker was a liberal. I guess the "I love God and guns" is the critcal clue into his liberalness.
The young lad Shawn sounds like a nice catch for Bristol and rearing youngsters. I wonder when we'll see them on TMZ.
Dancing with the shotgun.
I'll put on my "thinking cap" (condom), and I'll see what I can come up with…
Yes, Lee Harvey Oswald the patsy USMC vet was quite the hippie.
Well if this doesn't qualify her to be president I don't know what does.
Seriously, I don't.
Like an 18 year old gun and bible thumper cares about a restraining order issued by an "activist" judge.
He's taking his cues right out of the "Book of Sarah."
Inciting imbeciles has consequences, Talibimbo.
If she thinks this guy is scary she clearly hasn't met most of her neighbors.
Mama Grizzlies need no peer review!
Where's the NRA on this; is Sarah Palin trying to subvert the gun rights of this real American? Shouldn't she be celebrating that Mr. Christy has availed himself of his 2nd Amendment rights, and is even talking of "2nd Amendment remedies" to something that annoys him (her). After all, isn't his possession of a shotgun immaterial, because guns don't kill people, people do?
Unfortunately left-wingers, because they generally lack moral restraint, are more driven to go through with calculated acts like this than conservative nut-jobs are.
This statement brought to you by the edumacated alums of Glenn Beck University.
He's not crazy, Sarah. He's your base.
I dunno. I think the punchline for that joke would still be "The Aristocrats!"
After taking a number of jaw-droppingly vulgar stabs at it, I pretty much came to the same conclusion.
Trigg.
Hmmmmm. God and a gun, sounds like a librul alright!!!
Thanks to Sarah, we now get to spend quality time with the demonically possessed. Not to mention the daily patronizing wallow in bad behavior that has become her stock in trade.
Unfortunately left-wingers, because they generally lack moral restraint
Uh, it's generally the right-wingers who claim a person can't be moral without following a three thousand year old rulebook. Seems pretty obvious to me who doesn't lack an inherent morality.
P.S. Lee Harvey Oswald was trained to be a killer by the US Marines after dropping out of high school and being diagnosed with mental disorders, and he shot a fucking Kennedy! Why does Simon Roth hate America?
That image, the text mentioning self control in relation to the Palins is pretty funny. Sarah and Todd had a shotgun wedding when they found out their first kid was on the way. Bristol is an unwed mother. All of them have diarhea of the mouth. Sarah and Todd apparently undertook a campaign of revenge against Sarah's former brother-in-law. Where does the self control come in with that bunch?
Funny how these freedom-loving, socialism-hating types always run straight to the government to protect them from imaginary harm with my tax money.
Like the Teabagging olds who stand around screaming about the Socialist Health Plan and how it's a muslin commie plot and no government involvement with their health care thankyewverymuch. While they run up huge Medicare bills buying Viagra and Oxycotin.
Did anyone else notice the dick between that child's legs in the photo?
What's Carl Paladino's favorite YouTube video?
We're all Shawn R. Christy now.
Wow. All this time I've been calling Sarah Palin a cunt. As it turns out, she's also a giant pussy.
he is going to sell everything and come to Alaska with his shotgun
Boom-chicka-wow-wow.
♫♪♪ I say do the jerk now. ♫
Crazy knows its own kind.
Palin also testified that he also believes he has some kind of relationship with her daughter, Willow, and has brought up the girl’s name.
Guy probably just follows A-Rod on Twitter.
Wait – I thought we libtards were all "peace, love, dove pussies". Conservetards are afraid of us???? Hey – you know – I think I could start to like that.
So could I. Be interesting to see the how the NRA reacts to LIBERALS stocking up on weapons and doing the open carry thing at tea party rallies.
♫♫ We are well armed ♪♫
♪♪ We are the children ♫♪
James Earl Ray was a commie.
James Earl Ray was a racist, Lee Harvey Oswald was a commie.
LIBRULZ R 2 WEENIE 2 HAV TEH GUNZ
I R LIBRUL AND I HAZ TEH LOTS O' GUNZ.
Obama's death panel has come to get sarah!!!
Since I returned to Wonkette after summer break, I found new controls that I don;t know how to operate. I accidentally clicked on an avatar and now I'm following this guy I don't wish to follow, and I don't know how to stop.
No doubt Shawn R. Christy is in a similar fix.
Just send him an email explaining how you're thinking of bringing your shotgun. Should clear those problems right up.
God and Guns? Yep, liberal.
Shawn R. Christy is one of those people that the Evil Elitist Socialist Muslin Obama said "Clings to his God and Guns", so why is Bible Spice alienating her base?
"… lack moral restraint…"
The name Newt Gingrich comes to mind.
The name Carl Paladino comes to mind.
The name George Bush comes to mind.
The name David Vitter comes to mind.
The name Richard Nixon comes to mind.
The name Mark Sanford comes to mind.
The name Timothy McVeigh comes to mind.
I certainly don't want her dead. I want this poster child for all that is wrong with the right to live forever as a constant reminder. Same with Dick Cheney. I want him to live to enjoy many more heart attacks.
You're getting your wish. Cheney's heart is effectively dead and he's hooked up to a machine until he expires surrounded by great wealth and evil admirers.
I want to live to enjoy many more of Dick Cheney's heart attacks also.
Shawn has already done Amerkia a favor.
If I was some kind of powerful trickster God, I'd totally make Shawn R. Christy fall in love with Simon Roth right now.
karma, baby.
any adults in that house watching the kids besides Piper?
Gee hope nothing bad happens. It's harder to refudiate a shotgun blast than one might think.
http://www.cannedrevolution.com/lies/images/oswal...
"DearsarapalingIloveyouandwillbecomingtoseeyouwithashotgunforsomereason"
A modern American romance if I ever saw one.
Fantasy obsessed, armed, whackadoodles are her constituency. What, she's going to take out restraining orders against them all? And here I thought the foreclosure courts were overwhelmed.
I have no idea what a "Fenty" is – I'm just seeing if my avatar is working.
And now I'm trying to figure out how this showed up on this thread…..technology…….meh.
The BTK (Blind Torture Kill) serial killer was a leader of his church.
Susan Smith was a deeply religious churchgoer. At least she had the conservative decency to blame a black man for her missing kids. (Admittedly, she was molested by a deeply religious stepfather, and I'm sure that didn't help much.)
Phillip Garrido was trying to distribute religious literature when he was finally arrested for decades long imprisonment of the eleven year old he kidnapped.
Gosh, the moral restraint does shine forth from this crowd.
You know normally this is when the objective person points out that nuts on both sides of the margins commit violence but you know what? fuck him! I'm so, so tired of wingnuts trying to pretend like abortion clinic bombers, doctor murderers, racial violence against minority groups (seriously, they attacked Seiks after 9/11 thinking they were muslims, remember that?) Timothy McVeigh, Eric Rudolph the all american terrorist, the sickos who murdered Matthew Shepard, the nut who shot police 'cuz Glenn Beck told him they's was takin' his guns and the asshole who shot up the Unitarian Church because he couldn't shoot Obama don't fucking exist!
If you look at this countries long and bloody history of civilian crazy person violence, the scales almost completely point rightward; like the teabagger who 9/11'nd the IRS was also a wingnut. Shit Byron "Low Tax" Looper and Dan White were fucking Republican officials, also. I know, long rant and I'm only scratching the surface for how deep the well goes for these nutters and their sickheaded violence fetish. So in closing Simon Roth you dumb, morally confused and myopic authoritarian follower of Atilla the Slut…go fuck yourself.
I am way too drunk right now to read that text in the clipart. Is it intelligible to sober people?
You hate mongering jerks make me sick. You have nothing better to do than lie and say false witness against Sarah. Then when someone threatens her, you sneer and say she deserves it. Yeah, right. What a bunch of hate mongering jerks. You will stand in front of God someday, and give an account of yourselves, and it won't be pretty. Sarah's going to be a lot better off than you on judgment day.
Your hatefullness and coldness of heart angers me. But I must remember to have compassion for you. You are obviously deceived by Satan, and need to have your heart and mind renewed. I hope the hate and lies get cleaned out of your heart someday. It will be a shock to you, I'm sure, to suddenly see clearly again.
Did you know you are the 2nd person ever to threaten me with what will happen on judgment day? The other one was the crazy guy with a plate in his head who wanders around my hometown muttering to himself. He told me, when I was in High School and had a part time job as a cashier, that I would get mine on judgment day because the canned peas rang up at 59 cents instead of 49. You seem less lucid and grounded than he is.
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