Teabaggers Embrace Silly Bandz Terrorism

  • Gay Republicans are SO BRAVE AND COURAGEOUS for openly acknowledging the fact that gays can ONLY breed society-destroying criminals and welfare queens. [Gay Patriot]
  • Silly-Bandz whore Justin Bieber played a domestic terrorist on one of those CSI shows. Why does TV want to poison our impressionable tweens against patriotic terrorism? [Breitbart]
  • No one trusts the media because of people like us, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! [RedState]
  • One of David Horowitz’s self-important slave bloggers got into a catty fight in the comments section of a blog, DRUDGE SIRENS. [NewsRealBlog]
  • Yahweh loves Christine O’Donnell SO MUCH he will descend from heaven and anoint her queen of America, personally. [DailyKos]

About the author

Benjamin Frisch is a comic book artist, and sometimes journalist currently habituating somewhere on the elitist liberal east coast of the United States. His published works include a short lived, but beloved cross-dressing comic strip entitled Maurice Antoinette and some other stuff not worth mentioning. As a journalist, Benjamin somehow contributed to National Public Radio, with his story At the Concert Hall, a Symphony for Space Invaders. Benjamin is currently delaying adulthood as a graduate student, and plans to remain one forever. He can be twittered at Twitter.com/BenjaminFrisch

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33 comments

  1. natoslug

    What (besides breasts and a vagina and some seriously eighties hair) does Christine O'Donnell have that I don't? God speaks to her constantly. But does he talk to me? No! He doesn't call, he doesn't write, and he hasn't taken care of the dent he put in my fender the last time he borrowed by truck. Bastard.

    1. JMPEsq

      So maybe Jesus appeared to her in the middle of her work (campaigning) day with six robed dudes and told her he was angry about the way Wonkette made fun of him…

      1. natoslug

        I don't think the world is ready for a female me. Besides, I'd spend the day fantasizing about myself and never get any work done.

    2. nachoproblem

      It's because she never masturbates, obviously. God is probably more than a little resentful for the number of kittens you make him kill.

    1. Bonzos_Bed_Time

      They're True Believers; whatever charges the lamestreammedia brings up just proves their Xtine is the Chosen One.

  2. Ducksworthy

    Poor Benjamin Frisch. Combing through the mountains of stinking filth that is the right wing blogosphere to find a few truly hideous bleats. I envision the poor Philippino garbage scavengers. What a nasty job.

    1. SayItWithWookies

      Yeah, today's internets feature a truly ghastly collection of crap. But don't worry, it'll be bad for a while, but things'll calm down after the election. Of course that was what I said back in 2008, too. Okay, nevermind.

  3. charlesdegoal

    Another easily verifiable rumor on the Internets is that next Sunday's NYTimes Magazine will feature a profile of Glenn Beck as a reconstructed alcoholic, wherein it is disclosed that he may have had a spiritual awakening but also that there seems to be a problem with his being returned to sanity, which is taking inordinately long.

  4. VaWyo

    I feel awful now that I know Ann Coulter and the gay republicans think my heterosexual marriage is a sham. If someone had only told me that I had to have children to make it legit …

    Now we know. No marriage for gays or DINKS!

  5. elpinche

    Sorry, I'm speechless, but NewsRealBlog has an ad with a heavily photoshopped picture Mann Coulter from 1986 which looks kind of hot. My dick is severely confused right now.

      1. Lascauxcaveman

        Well, that was really early in her career. Remember what 20 years of living with the Dark Side of the Force did to Anikin Skywalker's boyish good looks?

        1. BaldarTFlagass

          Hey, I wouldn't mind getting me some more a that Arcturean poontang. Remember that time?

          Yeah, Frost, but the one that you had was a male!

          It doesn't matter when it's Arcturean, baby!

    1. elviouslyqueer

      Just keep reminding yourself that the hair barely masks an Adam's apple the size of Staten Island. That should help deflate any possible chubs.

  6. el_chupacabra

    ugh, reading someone's blog about the convo they had in the comments section of some other blog is right up there with listening to people describe the dream they just had… interesting for about 5 seconds. it is also up there with describing the size of shit you just took, the amount of sex you accomplished in college and how long it's been since you ate meat/drank booze/killed a hooker.

  7. bringmeanaxe

    I just finished reading the comments section at the Gay Patriot site. Excuse me, but I have to go vomit now.

  8. aisai

    I for one agree with Alex Knepper, it's disgusting how CSI can display a right wing terrorist. Everyone knows terrorists only come in one of two flavors – Al Qaeda and secret muslin marxist nazi half-breed Kenyan. I'm sure there are no examples of people being inspired to violence by right wing activists in American history

  9. politics_nerd

    Well, thankfully God has made everything clear by tossing the election to Coons. Christine surely understands that He disapproves of her, her ideology, and candidacy, and moved the firmament away from her name on the ballot. Think she'll listen?

Comments are closed.