DREAMS CAN COME TRUE  1:45 pm September 29, 2010

Mich. Assistant AG Has Awkward, Sexually Charged TeeVee Talk

by Josh Fruhlinger

Everyone needs a hobby!Andrew Shirvell is Michigan’s assistant attorney general, a University of Michigan alum, and absolutely 100 percent heterosexual, according to his Facebook page, which lists one of his interests as “Finding the Right Lady” and includes a picture of him touching a human female! While he’s not busy assisting the real attorney general, he does normal, straight-guy stuff, like “building up the kingdom” and maintaining his obsessive blog about the University of Michigan’s student body president, who is gay. Nothing weird about that, no sir!

OK, maybe it’s a little weird? But whatever, it totally worked to achieve its true purpose, which was to get a coveted interview on Anderson Cooper’s show. Do you like watching creepy, awkward dudes who may not be entirely comfortable with certain secret aspects of their lives squirm and roll their eyes a lot while a conversation with a handsome, silver-haired news anchor doesn’t quite go as planned? Then this video is for you, friend! (Skip ahead to 2:50 or so for the actual interview.)

“It appears, though, that you’re obsessed with this young gay man,” says Anderson! The whole thing is pretty much as sexy and terrifying as you might guess, based on that one quote. It’s like a John Irving novel encapsulated in a 10-minute YouTube video featuring a prematurely balding mid-level state government functionary. (Thanks to Wonkette hero operative “Nick” for the tip!) [YouTube/Facebook]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 134 comments }

tribbzthesquidz September 29, 2010 at 1:48 pm

It's creepy sex dysfunction day at Wonkette! A toast to hawt coercive lovin'!

legalize everything September 29, 2010 at 2:01 pm

Isn't everyday creepy sex dysfunction day at our Wonkette?

LetUsBray October 2, 2010 at 1:33 am

It's definitely what keeps me coming back.

fetys September 29, 2010 at 1:50 pm

Hell hath no fury like a conservative scorned on Grindr.

kenlayisalive September 29, 2010 at 1:52 pm

"absolutely 100 percent heterosexual" = "totally, totally gay". It's the most important formula in all of Republican Algebra.

ChurchofRealism September 29, 2010 at 1:54 pm

Hahaha, my state blows. This guy just needs a leather daddy.

Nopantsmcgee September 29, 2010 at 4:27 pm

We don't blow.

Well, maybe a little.

blixtophel September 30, 2010 at 8:05 am

But we did enshrine in our constitution that same sex people can't be married, so of course he needs the 'right' woman….

Lascauxcaveman September 29, 2010 at 1:55 pm

Anderson Cooper made him squirm. Just not the way he was hoping for, though.

MarionNYNY September 29, 2010 at 1:56 pm

It's official. Hell is high school and we're all in high school hell.

x111e7thst September 29, 2010 at 2:02 pm

Too true. And where is Buffy when I really need her? Or Faith? Or Buffy and Faith? http://www.slowmotion.ru/series/btvs/chosen.jpg

Umbrageofsnow September 29, 2010 at 1:56 pm

Messy breakup, Andrew?

MarionNYNY September 29, 2010 at 1:57 pm

My heart bleeds for the AG. I once had a completely incompetent secretary who was on a civil service line. Getting rid of her was a nightmare.

second_gen September 29, 2010 at 2:06 pm

Don't let your heart bleed too much. He's anti-gay too, and defended the Anti-marriage equality amendment and had public employee benefits ended for same sex couples. Cox is just embarrassed that Shrivel is so "out" about his views.

JoshuaNorton September 29, 2010 at 1:59 pm

Like Maher said last week. "If you have more to say about anyone being gay other than 'who cares', then YOU'RE gay."

Me thinks they all protest waaaaay too much.

doloras September 29, 2010 at 4:49 pm

Does that work for trannies, too?

ManchuCandidate September 29, 2010 at 2:00 pm

Favorite song: "It's raining men, hallelujah!!!"

SecretMuslin September 29, 2010 at 2:00 pm

Christ almighty god in space heaven. I believe Mr Armstrong needs a restraining order stat!

freakishlywrong September 29, 2010 at 2:00 pm

Fuck gaydar going to 11, this jizz repository sent it to terabytes.
And my creepdar as well. Too. Also. ICK.

elviouslyqueer September 29, 2010 at 2:41 pm

The fact that he opened his mouth and a dick didn't fall out surprised me as well.

second_gen September 29, 2010 at 2:02 pm

Well, he's just a few eleventy-something miles from Niles, MI. Maybe he took a wrong turn somewhere.

Troubledog September 29, 2010 at 2:02 pm

He first tried to lure Anderson Cooper into a "one-on-one" interview, on a boat filled with lube and dildos, but no Marvin Gaye. That would be too formulaic.

freakishlywrong September 29, 2010 at 2:22 pm

We ARE up to our anuses in creepy sexytime CNN reporter stories today, aren't we?

Serolf_Divad September 29, 2010 at 2:03 pm

Oh man, I can't see the video or Facebook (blocked at work) but the blog is… fucking.. creepy:

And, to all my vicious, anti-Christian detractors out there, including the Jones brothers and Armstrong's other crazed supporters, I have a message for you all: this watch site is here to stay. Get use to it.

I have done NOTHING immoral OR illegal. Sadly, the same cannot be said for Armstrong and his fellow radical homosexual activists and "allies." As Isaiah rightly prophesied: "Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness . . ." (5:20).

This Concerned Michigan Alumnus would rather go homeless and sleep on the street than give-up my First Amendment rights to freedom of expression and religion.

"Never Underestimate the Motivation of a True Believer." Got it? Good!

prommie September 29, 2010 at 2:21 pm

That there is what you call your internal dramatic fantasy in which you are the bold crusader for right, bravely withstanding the slings and arrows of the sinners and lesser beings who assail you from all sides, enduring a brave martyrdom for the true cause, knowing that in the end you will prevail and be acclaimed as God's own hero and champion.

Oh, he's more than just a self-hating closet case, he's another narcissistic personality disorder type, right there with O'Keefe.

He should move to Uganda, he could be their anti-gay Torquemada, rooting out fags and bringing them to justice, that'd be right up his alley.

outragedcitizen September 29, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Holy Crap, Mr. Armstrong really, really needs a restraining order against this nutsack.

prommie September 29, 2010 at 2:29 pm

You are correct, sir, this is a Talibornagain, indeed.

Terry September 29, 2010 at 2:52 pm

I was raised a nice Catholic girl and I swear that these people must have been raised in a parallel universe Evil Church or something. We had bake sales and made food baskets for poor people in our area. I don't recall EVER hearing anti-gay stuff in our Parish. I'm thinking that this guy and all like him should be forced to wear pointy goatees in the precedent established in Star Trek.

transfatz September 30, 2010 at 12:41 am

Through his faults, through his faults, through his most grievous faults. Espiritu santorum. Amen.
The parallel universe of Altar Boy.

Barrelhse September 29, 2010 at 5:17 pm

Get "use" to it? The asshole's illiterate. Is "give up" really hyphenated? Asshat.

zhubajie September 29, 2010 at 8:25 pm

So join the gay church!

undeadgoat October 1, 2010 at 12:01 am

Well he has now friends-locked his livejournal, so I guess that technically counts as "here to stay"? Whateverz dude, national media attention actually did break you. Srry.

BaldarTFlagass September 29, 2010 at 2:04 pm

Like I said a few days back during the latest DADT brouhaha, you don't have to ask, because you can just tell.

outragedcitizen September 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

As soon as he opened his mouth, I thought, "Yep, self-loathing closet dweller."

loquacioustunes September 29, 2010 at 2:04 pm

With a last name like "Shrivel," I'd imagine that most of his talks are awkward and sexually charged.

freakishlywrong September 29, 2010 at 2:04 pm

He was probably reading that to the priest that was butt secksing him when he was a younger.

Badonkadonkette September 29, 2010 at 2:05 pm

I'll bet anyone $1 Shirvell spent his youth running up to little boys on the playground, pulling their hair, and running away. And by "youth," I mean "20s."

Ruhe September 29, 2010 at 2:05 pm

When you're a heterosexual male teenager the phrase "looking for the right lady" means "my molars are practically floating in testosterone and I need to find a female of any age and condition who is willing to have sex with me right now." When your a male in the prime of your professional life and you use that same phrase it parses out a bit differently, i.e., "right lady" equals "beard that fits my face".

Steverino247 September 29, 2010 at 4:33 pm

I guess it's a good thing I married the right lady, then. Your explanation makes clear that sensation I've had from time to time. Now my wife won't laugh when I tell her I'm so horny my teeth hurt.

Fare la Volpe September 29, 2010 at 2:06 pm

Yeesh, imagine how Andy would act if Chris had used teeth.

SayItWithWookies September 29, 2010 at 2:06 pm

Wow — he looks like he acted out in school just so the nuns would spank him.

Steverino247 September 29, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Oh, shit! I've got a "follower" now. Do I need a restraining order or something?

tribbzthesquidz September 29, 2010 at 2:19 pm

I'm liberal with the "foller" button once I feel comfortable with somebody, sexually that is.
I know people are hesitant to look uncool by digging in to our new IntenseDebate thingy. I don't ever look cool anyway so I don't keer.

Dashboard_Jesus September 30, 2010 at 1:36 am

oh, oh,oh…I'm a 'follower' of you now too, but don't worry, I'm definitely NOT gay! (just don't look behind you ok, I get embarrassed when 'outed'! :)

bumfug September 29, 2010 at 2:08 pm

Great picture – he looks like he's checking out Anderson's package.

TheInternet September 29, 2010 at 2:15 pm

The picture also looks like what would happen if Pee Wee Herman had uptight conservative parents who made him go to law school.

Well, not just the picture. The story, too.

DashboardBuddha September 29, 2010 at 2:10 pm

Jesus…never mind. Why do I have to share a world with ass faces like this?

Dashboard_Jesus September 30, 2010 at 1:48 am

well 'never mind' to you too my Buddha buddy…BTW, did you notice how many times his beady little eyes rolled up to the heavens every time he was confronted with his stalkin'?!

waitforsugar September 29, 2010 at 2:10 pm

Every time he says "Um, excuse me Anderson" a fairy gets their wings.

TheInternet September 29, 2010 at 2:12 pm

One of this guy's Facebook interests is "Bill Schuette for Attorney General."

Which might explain: "Michigan Attorney General Mike Cox has declined to comment directly about Shirvell’s comments, saying he is pursuing legal action against the civil servant, who works on the blog during his off-hours."

JMPEsq September 29, 2010 at 2:41 pm

Wait, so the Michigan AG race is between Cox and Schuette? Hm, no no double entendre possibilities there.

Terry September 29, 2010 at 2:54 pm

Maybe Mike Cox is too liberal for him.

gurukalehuru September 29, 2010 at 3:05 pm

So, Shrivel likes Schuette even more than Cox. I don't know what's going on in Michigan, but it ain't right.

Boredw/Gravity September 29, 2010 at 4:37 pm

Hahaha, you said "Mike Cox." I'll bet Shrivel loves Mike Cox, too.

Tommmcatt September 29, 2010 at 2:12 pm

I'm not watching that video. I work with Disney executives, so I've seen enough repressed homosexuality to last me a lifetime.

axmxz September 29, 2010 at 2:12 pm

Not only is this dude obviously gay, he's obviously into little boys.

prommie September 29, 2010 at 2:13 pm

The eye-rolling, thats some coded bigotry for his freinds and well-wishers, its his way of saying "oh yeah, but you're a fag" to everything Anderson says to him. Dude is as fucked up as O'Keefe. I want to fucking kick these sociopaths in the nuts when they get so fucking full of themselves that they think they can piss on your leg and tell you its raining, and you'll never catch them because they are so smart.

Dubya Bush had this one moment for which he should rot in hell, in a televised ceremony on MLK day, Corretta King presents him with a portrait, a painting, of MLK. Bush takes it, smirks, and says "Thank you. I can't wait to HANG IT." And then he snickers and smirks. Heh heh, I made a secret joke, noone will get it, heh heh. Thats the same shit this dude is doing with the eye-rolling. "Look at this faggot calling me wierd, he he."

kenlayisalive September 29, 2010 at 3:12 pm

Whoa, for real? Is that on YouTube?

Dashboard_Jesus September 30, 2010 at 1:54 am

man, that's EXACTLY what I noticed, all the eye-rollin', back and to the left, back and to the left (that's how how you can tell folks is lyin' by which direction their eyes is rollin'!)

problemwithcaring October 1, 2010 at 3:34 pm

I hate the "I am sensing anger" thing, i.e. the meme that the reason that gay rights can't move forward in this country is because gay people are so shrill and angry about their rights. "Any student of political campaigns can understand why I am trying to ruin the life of a 21 year college student, but your imperceptibly small amount of anger in response completely confuses me!!"

WigFlipper September 29, 2010 at 2:14 pm

Anderson Cooper: never ashamed to go after the low-hanging fruit.

prommie September 29, 2010 at 2:30 pm

I see what you did, there.

imissopus September 29, 2010 at 2:15 pm

I have done NOTHING immoral OR illegal.

Immoral or illegal, probably not. But creepy and obviously self-loathing? Most definitely.

natoslug September 29, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Nah, he just makes sure it's immoral AND illegal. And really, really creepy.

transfatz September 30, 2010 at 12:04 am

"I am NOT a creep."

Fare la Volpe September 29, 2010 at 2:18 pm

"Among other things, Shirvell has published blog posts that accuse Armstrong of going back on a campaign promise he made to minority students; engaging in "flagrant sexual promiscuity" with another male member of the student government; sexually seducing and influencing "a previously conservative [male] student" so much so that the student, according to Shirvell, "morphed into a proponent of the radical homosexual agenda;" hosting a gay orgy in his dorm room in October 2009; and trying to recruit incoming first year students "to join the homosexual 'lifestyle.' "

Listen to the dongthirst just a-dripping from Shirvell's mouth. Gurl's just so damn jealous of Chris gettin' some she dunno what do wit herself.

Tommmcatt September 29, 2010 at 2:24 pm

HAHA, "dongthirst" earns you a thumb.

Fare la Volpe September 29, 2010 at 2:35 pm

But not a finger.

transfatz September 30, 2010 at 12:08 am

Well, at least a slippery molecule.

JMPEsq September 29, 2010 at 2:43 pm

And so what's he done that's actually immoral and illegal? As a lawyer Shirvell should have heard about that Lawrence v Texas case a few years back.

Terry September 29, 2010 at 2:56 pm

"sexually seducing and influencing "a previously conservative [male] student" so much so that the student, according to Shirvell, "morphed into a proponent of the radical homosexual agenda;" "

Maybe Shirvell's gentleman friend left him for the college kid.

JMPEsq September 29, 2010 at 3:04 pm

In other words, helping a self-loathing closet case come out and get over the self-hatred; um, Mr. Shirvell, that is an undeniably moral act.

kenlayisalive September 29, 2010 at 5:16 pm

"flagrant sexual promiscuity" with another male member of the student government

How can you be flagrantly promiscuous with one other person?

SaintRond September 29, 2010 at 2:18 pm

This paranoid schizophrenic is clearly dangerous. It's like a horror movie.

seppdecker September 29, 2010 at 2:18 pm

I'm having flashbacks to Ted Haggard in Jesus Camp. Also, Anderson, Shirvell is so obviously NOT a "grown man." Check back in ten years, when he moves in with sugar-daddy Ken Mehlman.

Nopantsmcgee September 29, 2010 at 4:31 pm

Wow, I thought that too. That was one creepy back-to-the-future moment in Jesus Camp.

Billmatic September 29, 2010 at 2:20 pm

It's really hard to have a winning argument on a serious blog when you use extensive screencaps of your enemies' facebook posts to accuse them of, from what I can glean, being radical homosexuals. How can you possibly be a radical homosexual without a skateboard or something?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P3q12eyoQ0g/THF3SORd48I

He's not mocking God he's mocking the fact that PEOPLE ARE MAKING UP QUOTES AND ATTRIBUTING THEM TO GOD!??!?! How is that not obvious? Why does this make people so mad, especially when they trumpet the first amendment constantly?

Bonzos_Bed_Time September 29, 2010 at 3:22 pm

So Wonkette isn't a serious blog?

Billmatic September 29, 2010 at 4:13 pm

I haven't seen a lot of Facebook screens of normal college people being declared dangerous and intolerant radicals on this site.

Bonzos_Bed_Time September 29, 2010 at 4:34 pm

They need to try harder!!!

undeadgoat October 1, 2010 at 12:06 am

I know a lot of normal college people, if I had time I could probably frame most/all of them of being dangerous & intolerant radicals. For example, they aren't homophobic.

Krugmanic Depressive September 29, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Can his nomimation to the 9th Circuit be far behind?

Troubledog September 29, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Cox / Shrivel 2012!
"We'll Pound Their Gay Asses Back Into The Closet!"

Extemporanus September 29, 2010 at 2:52 pm

Is Mike Cox running against Mike Hunt?

natoslug September 29, 2010 at 2:23 pm

Wow. I love his justification for being a complete fuckhead — "I'm not the only one to criticize Chris, I'm not the first person to criticize Chris." So, as long as someone is the victim of group harrassment, it's all cool? Got it. There's gotta be a group of gay commandos somewhere near this guy that can beat some sense into him . . .

imissopus September 29, 2010 at 2:26 pm

End of the interview:

Anderson: Do you want to come back to my place.

Shirvell: All right.

DonnyKerabotsos September 29, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Anyone else detect a certain Paul Ruebens/Pee Wee Herman mugshot similarity?

Extemporanus September 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

"Michigan Ass't AG"?

Mmm, ass tea…

freakishlywrong September 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Keep an eye out for suicides in Michigan this week, where the victim is found to be a mid-level public servant with a Chinese dry-wall dido stuck up his ass.

Urban_Achiever September 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Hey Shrivel (typo but I'm keeping it), I got 2 words for you: Ken Mehlman. That is all.

lowaltflier September 29, 2010 at 2:28 pm

“Finding the right lady” can mean many things to many people.
Like finding the right picture on a porn sight.

JMPEsq September 29, 2010 at 3:07 pm

The right lady is obviously a self-loathing closeted lesbian, with whom he can maintain a mutual fake marriage for social purposes while not having to deal with that kind of sex they don't really want.

Oh, Christine, there's someone I'd like to introduce you to…

zhubajie September 29, 2010 at 8:29 pm

Maybe the right lady-boy?

OneYieldRegular September 29, 2010 at 2:28 pm

Speaking as one who, more than than 25 years ago, actually lived in a gender neutral university dormitory (including gender neutral restrooms and showers, much to my visiting aunt's shock and awe), I'm pretty sure that the "radical agenda" pushed by Satan's Michigan State Third Reich Representative already reached its heyday around the time Mr. Creepy was in diapers.

edgydrifter September 29, 2010 at 2:28 pm

Anderson Cooper used that interview to politely mark his turf. Chris Armstrong is HIS, bitches, so step off if you know what's best for you.

twogoats September 29, 2010 at 2:30 pm

I got another confusion here. He says that the Satanic radical homosexual agenda is to allow gender neutral housing, "where anyone of any gender can live with anyone else of any gender." That is MORE gay than the old system where all the guys showered together? WTF? I can't even follow this crap anymore.

Doglessliberal September 29, 2010 at 4:18 pm

I am stuck on "any" gender. There are more than two?

Preferred Customer September 30, 2010 at 1:35 pm

That's an excellent point.

It's sort of like the conservatives who want to keep clubs male-only. Why would anyone want that? What, exactly, is the objection to hanging around with women? I have to say, as an open and practicing heterosexual, I generally find the company of women to be quite pleasant. Desirable, even. Not sure why I'd just want to hang out with a bunch of dudes.

BornInATrailer September 29, 2010 at 2:34 pm

If Sasha Baron Cohen's "Straight Dave" character shaved and went to law school, this would be the result.

Eve8Apples September 29, 2010 at 2:36 pm

I suspect somewhere in his basement, he has stored a wetsuit, a couple of dildoes, a jar of vaseline, a whip and lots of child pornography.

Terry September 29, 2010 at 2:37 pm

His search for "the right lady" is going to be a difficult one in that he requires that she both be a conservative Catholic and have a penis.

elviouslyqueer September 29, 2010 at 2:39 pm

Andrew, Andrew, Andrew… So Chris turned you down when you propositioned him on Mandate. Geez, move on, already.

Rambone September 29, 2010 at 2:55 pm

I fear that we libtards will be hoisted by our collective petard when Andy Shrivel claims that his asinine behavior results from his ego-dystonic homosexuality thereby entitling him to bring discrimination claims against the state on the basis of both his sexual orientation and disability.

TanzbodenKoenig September 29, 2010 at 2:59 pm

This guy is insane. Also totally gay and displacing his self hate onto this kid he probably wants to bump uglies with.

DashboardBuddha September 29, 2010 at 3:04 pm

I showed this vid to a gay friend of mine. His gaydar pinged so hard he collapsed. I think he was just trying to get me to give him mouth to mouth, though.

(It won't work Stephen…stop trying)

tiger_tree September 29, 2010 at 3:05 pm

Wow, the editing on that tape was rather obvious. You could hear the continuity breaks in Shervell's audio especially. Wonder what got left out.

Badonkadonkette September 29, 2010 at 3:08 pm

How much wood would this dumb fuck suck if this dumb fuck could suck wood?

LetUsBray October 2, 2010 at 1:56 am

Ohh, that's something I'm going to have to steal.

MLite September 29, 2010 at 3:25 pm

Maybe Anderson can have a follow up interview where this freak can answer all of his questions, even those related to his FORMER job.

EdFlintstone September 29, 2010 at 3:35 pm

I never had gaydar but now I think I do. Writing on pictures of faces? That's from page 1 of Gayness by Perez Hilton.

Asa_Hawks September 29, 2010 at 3:36 pm

I would pay good money to be that oblivious.

ClydeMydia September 29, 2010 at 3:44 pm

A Pearl Necklace would look SO nice on Anderson!

Oppenheiner September 29, 2010 at 4:03 pm

98 comments and no one's mentioned Michigan AG Mike Cox? I'll take that low-hanging fruit: Mike Cox.

ttommyunger September 29, 2010 at 4:19 pm

Not saying either one of them is gay, couldn't care less, but I betcha they both would hold one between their teeth 'till the swelling went down.

Doglessliberal September 29, 2010 at 4:20 pm

Gay. Gay gay gay gay gay. Gay, also.

DemonicRage September 29, 2010 at 4:25 pm

The sound doesn't work on your embedded clip. Went to Youtube to view it. This is amazing. Like a 10 minute long horror movie. What is it that's out there in "Heartland Amerika?" Babbot lives!

smrtmnky September 29, 2010 at 4:40 pm

dear andy, less piggez and more manhunt.

besos,

mnky

Barrelhse September 29, 2010 at 4:59 pm

Heh. Shrivel. je je

PuckStopsHere September 29, 2010 at 5:27 pm

How'd this guy get hired? Easy. He shares the core beliefs/values of the man who hired him: Michigan Attorney General Mike Cox. Cox. He, he. Kinda fitting now that I think of it.

SaintRond September 29, 2010 at 6:54 pm

He's awfully gay, in a really stomach churning kind of way. But the thing that jumps out is, I think maybe he's a potential mass murderer too, which for me kind of overshadows the gay thing in a real big way.

I think he's a guy who could go out and shoot people at McDonalds. So fuck his sexism and bigotry – there's way more things to worry about with this cocksucker than that. Way more.

zhubajie September 29, 2010 at 8:32 pm

Remember John Wayne Gacy? Fucking teen-age runaway boys, then killing them and burying them under his house? Remember his cover as a middle class burbie businessman, with a wife etc.?Posting

Tim September 29, 2010 at 7:37 pm

I'm obsessed with several young gay men, but I tend to keep it to myself, 'cuz of the age difference. Oh, and BTW, the guy Shirvell is a flaming queen. God, Christians fuck people up.

Oh and Anderson, what's with that shirt?

williamsboi September 29, 2010 at 9:41 pm

the irony gets richer: dude also lists "life is too short to stress yourself with people who don't even deserve to be an issue in your life" as one of his "likes" on facebook!

CthuNHu September 29, 2010 at 10:23 pm

It sure doesn't include Emily Post, or a dictionary.

At 6:20 — "As an astute observer of political campaigns for many years, you know that these kinds of tactics are part for the course."

So, we got the whole "stalking the gay guy" thing. You're a closet case.

And we got the whole shrugging off incredibly vicious political smears as no biggie thing. You're an utterly vicious sociopathic asshole.

And now, just to top it off, you say "part for the course." We get it. You're a fucking moron.

Vicious closeted sociopathic moron asshole.

When you die and go to your eternal reward, Roy Cohn will have to listen for a week after he craps before he hears it splat on your head.

transfatz September 30, 2010 at 12:18 am

He has a soul full of hope for a hole full of soap.

transfatz September 30, 2010 at 12:47 am
Dashboard_Jesus September 30, 2010 at 1:40 am

holy crap, have you ever tried to READ the 'Catechism of the Catholic Church'? I grew up Catholic and can't even begin to tell you what a load of bullshit that is! The first time I heard some Catholic religion teacher use the word 'catachetical' in class I started scooting towards the exit door!

One_who_wanders September 30, 2010 at 7:46 am

I see that his FB page is no longer accessible – such a brave Christian soldier. Standing up to those ghey radicals and their allies. So how you liking your own petard?

simplyblue7 September 30, 2010 at 9:43 am

Clearly Mr. Shirvell's sexual advances were probably rejected. Perfectly understandable. If I were to be rejected by a good looking representative of satan, I'd protest outside their house too. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a gay nazi fantasy I must fullfil.

undeadgoat October 1, 2010 at 12:08 am

I'm pretty sure that dude just said "There is nothing gayer than a lady and a dude sleeping in the same room, in college."

Umm. Usually when I'm being gay, in college, there is ANOTHER LADY in the bedroom.

neiltheblaze October 1, 2010 at 2:47 pm

HA HA I misread this guy's name as "Shrivel" and thought he had had penile dimension problems. HA HA HA. Though – he probably does, actually.

Thedongsofwar October 1, 2010 at 3:04 pm

I like how the rainbow Nazi flag scrawled on the picture has an arrow pointing to Armstrong. Just in case the message of the piece is not clear enough.

inedal October 4, 2010 at 5:16 pm

just to add to the pot- Shirvel's boss has the nice name: Cox.
make what you like of this.

Triscuits September 30, 2010 at 11:58 am

Satan's sexy, sexy representative.

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