Teabaggers Forced To Cancel Convention Nobody Will Go To

In February, the Teabaggers had a "unity" party convention in Nashville, just like a real political party! Except for some reason those people had to pay to be delegates, every speaker dropped out at the last second, and Teabaggers from warring factions got up off their scooters near the hotel pool and lunged angrily at each other and fell onto the ground, writhing and unable to get up. Because the event was such a roaring success the first time, they planned another one in Las Vegas. That one kept being pushed back because of a lack of interest. (What would you rather spend your Social Security checks on, Glenn Beck's rally, or this convention WITHOUT GLENN AND SARAH, but with people who actually believe this Teabagger stuff?). But now it is cancelled. Haha.

But this particular Teabagger group shouldn't feel bad, because nobody is going to Teabagger events anymore that are actually about "substance" and "action" rather than "LOOK! IT'S MY FRIEND SARAH FROM THE TEEVEE!":

But Ms. Kinnison said in her e-mail that “the various large ‘other’ Tea Party organizations have slid in their participations and donations across the country, and their events are free.”

A group called Unite in Action had hoped to have a three-day Tea Party extravaganza of seminars and rallies in Washington starting Sept. 10, but Ms. Kinnison said that classrooms that the group had set up for 500 people ended up with only 5 in them. And a rally held by FreedomWorks that Sunday, while large, was far smaller than the one the group held a year ago.

So is the Teabag movement wrapping up as we go into the midterm season? No, all the Teabaggers probably died from exhaustion going outdoors and moving about more than once a year. But it's okay, they stipulated in their will that all their assets (handful of Goldline crap in the secret toolbox in the backyard) will be donated to Michele Bachmann's PAC. [ NYT ]