inevitable bullshit

Larry Summers To Join His Own Unemployment Statistics

Are there any other Clinton staffers left to appoint to run Obama's administration? Maybe that 'Good Morning America' guy?Larry Summers, head of Obama’s National Economic Council and noted guy who said a thing feminists didn’t like one time at Harvard, is not going to have that first job anymore after the midterms. This is “according to three people,” so it’s definitely true. So, with an economy continuing to struggle and constant ire among the voting public for Wall Street and the titans of industry, Obama surely will appoint someone who is a reformer, correct? Haha, no, he will appoint a dude who is more Wall Street than Larry Summers — specifically, a “prominent corporate executive.”

Administration officials are weighing whether to put a prominent corporate executive in the NEC director’s job to counter criticism that the administration is anti-business, one person familiar with White House discussions said. White House aides are also eager to name a woman to serve in a high-level position, two people said. They also are concerned about finding someone with Summers’ experience and stature, one person said.

IT’S GONNA BE MEG WHITMAN! Done. Easy.

Wait, she may win the governorship of California. So as a backup plan, Obama can appoint one (both?) of the Olsen twins.

White House officials declined to comment directly on Summers’ plans. Robert Gibbs, Obama’s chief spokesman, said today it “is not a surprise, that there will be people who have worked enormously hard over the past few years to make decisions to go back to doing” what they did before joining the administration.

Also not a surprise: economic advisors being pushed out when the economy is terrible. [Bloomberg]

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Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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