give me my no fear shirt or give me death

Teabaggers Not Allowed To Wear Ratty Teabagger T-Shirts In Obama’s USA

We have no idea what this thing is. But we found it on Team Sarah, and it seems appropriate. “Back in May, Diane Wickberg, a grandmother from Flagstaff, Ariz., slipped into the same outfit she wears every Tuesday — a white T-shirt bearing photos of the American flag and the U.S. Constitution, along with the words: ‘Flagstaff Tea Party — Reclaiming Our Constitution.’” You mean she put on her patriot uniform, lamestream media. Sure, this idyllic scene plays out every single day in foreclosed homes across the land as the Jesus-Sun rises over Ronald Reagan’s America. But not on May 18 in Arizona. That was the day this Teabagger was asked to cover up her t-shirt at the polls. SOCIALISSSSSSSM!

Tuesday is the day her local tea party meetings are held.

But on that particular Tuesday, May 18, there was a special election taking place and Ms. Wickberg wore her T-shirt to the polls at Bethel Baptist Church. She was confronted by poll workers and told to change the shirt, turn it inside out or cover it up with a jacket. After some back and forth, she was allowed to vote in the T-shirt but only because no other voters were around.

So she has done as any government-hater would do: she’s taken it to the activist judges in our judicial system in the form of a (TOTALLY NOT FRIVOLOUS DEMRAT AMBULANCE CHASER LAWYER) lawsuit.

Next they will be outlawing our scooters. How else is a person supposed to get from their Aerostar to the voting booth? There is literally no other way.

But this lady is really not a very good Teabagger. Real Teabaggers wear the same Teabagger t-shirt every day. [NYT]

About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

View all articles by Jack Stuef
What Others Are Reading

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.