While preaching to a crowd of hipster-lads, pastor and part-time Johnny Cash impersonator Jim Garlow explains why nobody in America can find a job. It's because everyone has been aborted, so there's no one left to buy any new stuff.
According to Garlow -- senior pastor of Skyline Wesleyan Church in San Diego, California, and chair of the Renewing American Leadership campaign for "freedom, faith and free markets" (Newt Gingrich is honorary chair!)-- all the people who've been killed by abortion would be having kids now, at least until they turned 15(?), and keeping the economy chugging along by acquiring Human Needs such as cars and houses and schools. But these people have all died in the "massive slaughter of humanity" -- resulting in America's rapid and well-documented population decline and your inability to find gainful employment.
Why can't you people just understand Garlow's very clear line of reasoning? Look, the Palins get it. So do the Duggars. Gingrich wants to get it -- in fact, he's probably on eHarmony.com at this very moment, looking for new, fertile wives. These folks acknowledge the TRUTH, that God wanted everyone to Be Fruitful and Multiply. He was not kidding, when He said this. But so many of you have acted like He was. Now look at the mess we're in -- no jobs, no futures.
Here's an idea: while you're unemployed and collecting those government hand-outs, why don't you do America a favor and have a baby? Think about someone else for a change. And this time, don't abort the baby -- let it live. Your job, or that of your neighbor, probably depends on it. [ YouTube / Renewing American Leadership website ]
If they had ultrasounds back in the date, my fetal portrait would have shown me with a glass of Dewers.
Our population is growing because we're having more abortions...that makes perfect sense. I feel bad now though. I had three abortions on the way to work just because I could...and I'm a guy.