maskq? moks? mawsk?

A Children’s Treasury of Facebook Comments About ‘the Mosk’

Et tu, hamburger kitten?
Multiple tipsters have sent us this fun Internet adventure: type “mosk” into Openbook, which shows you status updates of people who are too dumb to put any privacy setting on their Facebook account. EVIL LIBRULS have caught on to this, because quite a few of the results of this are now people saying, “Hey, go on this site and put in ‘mosk’,” but in between, predictably, there are quite a few gems. As Krauthammer knows, the American public is very smart and even-handed when it comes to things like the “mosk.”


This man is going to move to a fantasy country where white supremacy is law. Bon voyage!


This man thinks the “mosk” is disrespectful, yet he has no respect for history’s most important ripoff Honeymooners cartoon?


Oh look, this man is also planning a terrorist attack on an American building, right here on Facebook. He should get together in a terrorist cell with the Wilma boob-grabber.


WRITTEN IN MUSLIN? Is that the same as Messican?


Our way of life: shirtless, boogie-boarding embarrassment of our children at the beach.


Isn’t it just the best when people misspell “grammar”? Except this isn’t a person, it’s a house. Which perhaps explains the non sequitur about the pledge? (Houses love the Pledge of Allegiance, but aren’t very smart, because they’re inanimate objects.)


If you’re going to spell “mosque” incorrectly, why not spell the entire message incorrectly? Then you can pass on those spelling skillz to the next generation and be intolerant when they try to get their own ideas about how to spell words.


Well yeah, that’s the most important thing. They may have to pay money to build a mosque on the set of NCIS in Hollywood, where MOSKS DON’T BELONG. Except that show is set in Washington, not New York. [Openbook]

About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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81 comments

  1. karen

    That last woman looks like she needs to stop watching NCIS and get her tub-o-lard ass outside to exercise, the fat is making it impossible for her to smile while she spews her hatred.

  2. Rotundo

    Danny Quayle’s legendary communications gift has blossomed into a whole movement of illiterate dull witted assholes all writing their opinions as if anyone out there gave a rats. At least they’re amusing us on our way to extinction.

  3. JMP

    Dumb, violent and ugly, oh so ugly; real ‘merica in a nutshell here.

    Debra (sic) Johnson can’t even spell her own name, I see; and besides the Honer of her spelling she seems to Have interesting Ideas on capitalIZATION.

    Wow watching NCIS and showing off my grotesquely fat and wrinkly rack.

  4. SayItWithWookies

    Dorothea Sicilian gets her news from NCIS? No wonder she’s such an idiot — everyone knows that America’s finest news source ™ is CSI Miami.

  5. edgydrifter

    Nice example to set for your tardling, Debra. Unless Debra is the pictured tardling, in which case she’s setting a terrible example for her momma-sister.

  6. Rotundo

    Mahhhhhhhhsk, Mox, Mosx, Mosck, Mossc, Mosqc, Musk, Musc, I wonder how many versions of it we’ll see at Electric Glendoland (Suckerstock? Sapstock?) at the doin’s

  7. AnnieGetYourFun

    Something tells me that that child may never really get the hang of holding a pencil, but if she does, may she stab it directly into her mother’s eye.

  8. BlueStateLiberal

    The first “man” qualifies for that Twilight Zone episode where the bigot gets sent back to the Third Reich; the others qualify for lobotomies; well, he does too.

  9. leftcoaster

    Facebook *really* doesn’t want me to share this link. Even when I use a URL shortening service, they still mark it as “abusive or spammy.” Perhaps it is because it reveals the Facebook community for what it is – a representative subsection of the American population as a whole. In order words, mouth-breathing, beanbag-shaped retards who have lost any semblance of shame.

  10. Josh Fruhlinger

    The best part about “mosk-eurade”is that dude clearly knows how to spell “masquerade,” not even realizing that he was this close to the lovely “mosquerade.” (“Mosquerade” gets 30,000 Google hits right now!)

  11. OldOneEye

    I just checked out Your Open Book and wanted to test out how secure my Facebook was. I typed in “True Grit” because I said something about it on Facebook a few days ago and thought it wouldn’t come up too much.

    Thankfully, I didn’t come up so my Facebook is private. Which I like.

    Weirdly enough, though, at least half of the comments involving “True Grit” seemed to be insane ramblings about how much of a travesty it was that it was being remade but it wasn’t nearly as bad as the Mosque at Ground Zero. It’s insane.

  12. JMP

    To Rob Lankford, you know who else – oh wait, that joke doesn’t really work much when you’re dealing with an actual overt white supremacist.

  13. archivketch

    C’mon but we all love a “mosk-uerade.” Skillz! Damn! Too slow and didn’t catch all the smartypants who also love a mosk-uerade.

  14. petehammer

    But wait, Krauthammer said it wasn’t based on bigotry.

    No bigotry.

    I… wh… why would Wonkette photoshop all these facebook posts? Or are they just liberal plants designed to make True American Patriots look like bigots?

  15. tribbzthesquidz

    [re=647503]Extemporanus[/re]: [re=647515]tribbzthesquidz[/re]: Dang it. I take too long to post sometimes.

  16. nets_awesome

    For extra credit, do a search for muslin. My favorite:

    “there is nothing wrong with a muslin that a good dose of Jesus won’t cure”

    Yes, there’s nothing wrong with your fabric, it just needs to be blessed with Holy Water and tears from bald eagles.

  17. natteringnabomb

    Do messicans spell messican as worseley as mercans spell mercan?Ima gatherin up my mosketeers and leavin on a jet erraplain.

  18. Okie Dokie Dog

    Iffn we”d just bring GOD Back in to0 the pubic skoolz wher he wrightly be longz then we could al be blowin up Mosk bluidings for Jebus an our kidz would not be forcede 2 b SColialst. THEy r out
    fucturE!!!1 God bless you GLeNn!11

  19. Extemporanus

    [re=647523]tribbzthesquidz[/re]: Watch it, Squidz, or Mollusc Omar just might slap an ika on your traitorous, gellatinous ass.

    [re=647491]Senator Bateman[/re]: [re=647495]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: [re=647502]Dave J.[/re]: [re=647527]Koolaid[/re]: MOSK-O-WITZ DID WTC!!

  20. surfacenoise76

    One of the many reasons I don’t have a Facebook account (or any other “social” networking application) is that I’m afraid I’ll learn just how stupid some of my acquaintances might be.

  21. kenlayisalive_dot_org

    Someone get this man a guitar and youtube account. I feel like there is racist music in his soul.

    Tony Pruett OMG HOW CAN ANY REAL AMERICIAN SAY IT IS OK FOR THESE MURDERS TO BE IN OUR COUNTRY MUCH LESS BUILD MOSK ,,,,,ARE YALL STUPID OR WHAT ,,,YES IM ASKING YOU OUT THERE !!!!!

    GUY WHO LOVES LIFE ,FUN,,AND MAKING MY OWN CHOICES,,,NOT INTO TIME OUTS,BIG GOVERMENT ,,OR RAISING PANSY CHILDREN,,,VERY MUCH INTO FAMILY AND FRIENDS,,SPEAK MY MIND ,,,LIVE FREE, SLAVE TO NO MAN,,,

  22. Diabeetis

    Remember when Facebook used to be the more intelligent, classier alternative to MySpace, or at least touted as such?

  23. bago

    STOP the Mollusk at pound Zero! I’m not japanese, I don’t need more than a pound of tentacles.

  24. Patton

    Wait, Obama’s ass is going to build the “mosk”? I knew he was fit, but I didn’t know he was *that* fit.

  25. GeneralLerong

    What’s it like to feel perpetually resentful because absolutely everybody is smarter, more talented, better looking, more buff, and richer than yourself?

    Now we know, thanks to this fantastic piece of Ackchual Journalsim. I mean, Journalism.

  26. The Greatest American hero

    The first one is clearly written in LOLcat: the cat has cheezeburger. I don’t know about the other ones. I guess they’re just fucktarded.

  27. Butterscotch Stalin

    Y’all could’ve dumped the Face Book back in May or whenever, but now you’re stuck with it.

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get back to the witty and urbane party at diaspora*

  28. Limeylizzie

    I like the fool , Rey de Homo, who thinks the Mosk is being built on 9/11 this year, like in a week and a half, them muslin labourers move fast they are wiley.

  29. populucious

    Yes…down with the muslin stamps…I prefer my stamps to be tulle or a nice silk chiffon.

  30. a_pink_poodle

    Why does a “Mosk” remind me of Rocky & Bullwinkle?

    “Hey, Rocky! Watch me pass this airplane through that building without hitting it!”

  31. OCKerouac

    It would be interesting to see if there would be the same level of scared, bigoted, hateful opinions in our country right now if everyone had jobs…

    I mean… Kill them there Mooselimbs, walking around in their 9/11 masks!

  32. DustBowlBlues

    So, are we commenting on this thing? Would that expose my name to the world? I didn’t notice any references to truck nutz, so I assumed none of the wonkeratti have commented. Unless, of course, I’m hopelessly behind on what the real hep cats are doing now. Hep cat, btw, are beatniks, as opposed to funny. Well, now the beatniks look funny.

    How do we respond to this thing? I feel like shit and am taking new allergy pills that make me hate the world, so I may just join in the fun, if I can figure a way to combine mosk and trucknutz and muslins.

  33. finallyhappy

    The amazing stupidity of people in this country is no longer amazing. Stupidity reigns- and it will be here in Dc in full force tomorrow.

  34. Limeylizzie

    Brian Brogren ill say this multiple times but fuck obama, i hate him, the worst president ever. he has no idea what the hell he is doing. Plus wanting to build a mosk at ground zero in new york….. hell no too many people died for that to happen, if he was assasinated i wouldnt give a second thought or shed a tear, god have mercy on our souls
    4 days ago

    I bet he thinks Beck is a genius.

  35. DoktorZoom

    ” If the people who are building this Mosk at ground zero are American, Would we consider them to be committing Treasen? I believe so!”–Rick McNew

    The certainly aren’t committing “spelling.”

  36. DustBowlBlues

    Tony La Russa is speaking at this thing and the homerun king Card whose name I can’t spell while loaded on allergy medicine.

    By the way–thank you for being here for me, wonkeratti and editors. I’m fucked up on meds and in a completely crap, ugly mood and feel right at home here. Sniff. It’s a special moment. (That sniff was my hay fever, not Glennbeck-type tears).

    Anyone want to base a drinking game on taking a shot every time Glennda cries?

  37. DustBowlBlues

    [re=647664]OCKerouac[/re]: “It would be interesting to see if there would be the same level of scared, bigoted, hateful opinions in our country right now if everyone had jobs…”

    Nope. There wouldn’t be. See the 1930s. My Marxist friends in college blamed FDR for making Americans just satisfied enough to keep them staging the “real revolution.” (I have a friend here in town still waiting).

    It never occurs to them that, given our history, the “real revolution,” led by people like Huey Long, Father Coughlin and the Klan would have been National Socialist, not Marxist Socialist.

  38. DustBowlBlues

    [re=647708]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Oops. Wrong thread. I’ll move it. except the ghost of my comment will remain. Which is to say, I can’t delete it. Sorry.

  39. Lascauxcaveman

    It’s not nice to make fun of people just ’cause they know a word in Esperanto.

    ______
    (OK, for the record it’s really ‘moskeo,’ but it should be ‘mosk.’ Get with the program esperanto dudes.)

  40. finette

    the line “keep your frinds close & your enemies closer” doesn’t justify a mosk near time square! (emphasis mine)

    AHHHHHHHHHH why did you make me look at this Wonkette?!?

  41. kenlayisalive_dot_org

    DustBowl: Don’t lump Huey in there with Fr. Coughlin in the Klan. Whatever he might have been, he was no racist. And a little, um, aggressive in his governing, but certainly no fascist.

  42. dogscantlookup

    Shakespeare’s Colors: Race And Culture In Elizabethan England

    By James Schultz

    In the old age black was not counted fair,
    Or if it were it bore not beauty’s name;
    But now is black beauty’s successive heir,
    And beauty slandered with a bastard shame,
    For since each hand hath put on nature’s power,
    Fairing the foul with art’s false borrowed face,
    Sweet beauty hath no name, no holy bower,
    But is profaned, if not lives in disgrace.
    Therefore my mistress’ eyes are raven black,
    Her eyes so suited, and they mourners seem
    At such who, not born fair, no beauty lack,
    Slandering creation with a false esteem:
    Yet so they mourn, becoming of their woe,
    That every tongue says beauty should look so.
    Sonnet 127 by William Shakespeare

    There would be compensations, however: the beauty and quiet of the countryside, the easy camaraderie of the inn, the vivacity of your fellow travelers. Perhaps, one mid-afternoon, you could even run into William Shakespeare himself. And one thing is certain: Despite your preconceptions, Shakespeare’s London is not simply English and not simply white. For you will inevitably meet people of different nationalities.

    “Until now people have assumed that the Elizabethans did not know people of color,” says Shakespeare and English Renaissance scholar Imtiaz Habib, Old Dominion associate professor of English and author of Shakespeare and Race, a book that examines the political, social and cultural impact of Shakespeare’s approach to the racial issues contained within his plays. “We now have documented proof of the residences of black people, which must be reckoned into the colors of Shakespeare’s world, in a very literal sense. Shakespeare knew people of color. He walked through their neighborhoods every day.”…

    The rest is at the site http://www.odu.edu/ao/instadv/quest/Shakespeare.html
    It is interesting, but Europe and America was and always will be homogeneous and northern European!

  43. Weedle

    Sorry to ruin the fun, but I know that Brian Rammeth guy and he’s kidding. I think he copy/pasted that from Free Republic or somewhere.

  44. AddHomonym

    Mosk-uerade!
    Retard wingnuts are afraid.
    Mosk-uerade!
    Look around there’s another mosk behind you.

  45. gurukalehuru

    My first thought was “Wow, the internet is amazing. With a single entry, we can identify, list and neutralize an entire demographic, i.e. people too stupid to exist.” Then I realized how scary this technology is.

    First, they came for the stupids and I said nothing because I was not a stupid….

  46. Gun-toting Progressive

    “I say fuck the Muslums. As far as I’m concerned thay are enamys of the states. This Mosk is a slap in the face. Remember 911. Never forget. Ground zoro is holy ground not to be desacrated especaly by the people that attacked the USA. My father fought for this great Nation in WWII. He fought our enamys. Now we let our enamys take over our nation.”

    Honestly, you could NOT make this shit up. We are doomed as a nation.

  47. Queenjulie

    Wow, it’s nice that you guys are opposed to racism, but apparently sexism is in full swing here at Wonkette! No religious hatred, but it’s perfectly fine to refer to women as “a tub o lard” and “mommy-sister” to her “tardling.” Way to get a slur against mentally disabled people in there too! Awesome!

  48. Dubya T. Eff

    [re=648143]Queenjulie[/re]: Irony: b. incongruity between a situation developed in a drama (WTF comment, in actual metaphor-fucking GWB style*: and if all the world’s a stage, wear it) and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play —called also dramatic irony, tragic irony. More about dramatic irony- . . . a plot device in which the audience’s or reader’s knowledge of events or individuals surpasses that of the characters. The words and actions of the characters therefore take on a different meaning for the audience or reader than they have for the play’s characters. This may happen when, for example, a character reacts in an inappropriate or foolish way or when a character lacks self-awareness and thus acts under false assumptions.
    Sheesh, Queenie, take some Midol and pull the wedgie out! (See, that was ironic)

  49. Treefrog655

    “if i wasnt all busted up and old i would join the isrialie army,and nuke iraq and iran,and tell the president or the soviate union that george bush told me to do it,and that hes hiding in a mosk in pesilvania,heavely armed and guarded,he he” Where to begin….I weep for our future.

  50. imissopus

    [re=648143]Queenjulie[/re]: Did someone make a wrong turn on her way over to the comments section at Firedoglake? Women have no sense of direction, amirite?

  51. My Turn

    Easy to see what teabaggers do in their down time between rallies. Of course they have to staple teabags all over themselves and make illiterate signs. Life is not all beer and skittles for those patriots.

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