Your Wonkette has already told you about Congresscreep Meechellle Backmann‘s brand-new campaign commercial starring “Jim the Election Guy,” an android-like EveryBro who talks all dumb-like about Bachmann’s challenger, “Taxin’ Tarryl” Clark, while standing with his legs wide apart the whole time (it’s weird). Now Clark has responded with her own ad, and it’s got not just one but three Jims! They’re not as young and slick as Jim T.E.G., but they have passion and gravitas and supposedly are even registered to vote in Bachmann’s Congressional district. So: If a brawl between Bachmann & Jim and Clark & the Jims took place, which side would win? Answer in the comments. [Tarryl Clark web page]
THE JIMS VS. JIM BATTLE FOR OL'JIMPIC GOLD
August 27, 2010
Bachmann Challenger Fights Back With Her Own Army of Jims
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{ 42 comments }
The Jims of Tarryl, by default.
Bachmann’s Jim would be to busy working the MSP restrooms.
I’m gonna go with Clark and the Jims on the strength of Jim #3′s epic beard.
Oh, that dude with the big beard could definitely take JTEG all by himself, leaving everyone else to pile on and beat the living crap outta Madame Crazy-eyes. Amiright?
If I shut my eyes, I’d have to believe the Jim the First was Andy Rooney
Bachmann’s would win, because she’s God’s chosen, so He’s gonna put all the other Jims to the sword, every man, woman and child of them, and smite all their first-borns, and then Bachman and her Jim are gonna hang out forever in heaven not fucking and listening to Amy Grant.
This is easy. We know from Linda McMahon’s challenger what opponents of Teabaggers do.
Bachmann’s Jim is simply begging for a nut kick, and then those inflamed grapes will pop, and he’ll be useless. Then they’ll only have to deal with Bachmann’s claws.
Running against Bachmann, Ms. Clark shouldn’t need ads this complicated; a simple slogan should suffice, like “Vote Taryll: the district will no longer be a national laughingstock”.
[re=646929]harry palmer[/re]: Eternity listening to Amy Grant ain’t what I’d call heaven.
Damn! I must agree that Jim #3′s beard is epic. He could hide half the Palin clan in that.
Having three buddies along didn’t help Mace Windu and I don’t think they’ll help Tarryl. They will get chopped up pretty quick by Emperor Bachman who will then use her Retard Force Lightning on Tarryl or her smug boytoy Jimmy will cut Tarryl something good.
But good luck any way.
[re=646937]weejee[/re]: Yes, well that’s the problem with everything else they try to sell the place with, too. Hell, on the other hand, will at least be interesting.
I am also in awe of Jim with what appears to be some sort of triple beard. He is polyhirsutic , if that is a word or did I ,like Shakespeare and the Bard of Wasilla , just make it up?
Not another wide stance guy. I’m guessing he hangs out at the Minneapolis St Paul too.
[re=646946]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]:
MSP AIRPORT that is.
Jeeeeeezuz!
[re=646944]Limeylizzie[/re]: The one thing is a bard, the other hairs are growing out of a giant mole under his chin. And you’d think he could’v gotten dressed up to go on TV – but for him, that’s probably mean polyester-suitic.
[re=646944]Limeylizzie[/re]: Wow! What a coincidence. ‘Polyhirsutic’ came up on my Word of the Day Calendar yesterday! And today’s word is ‘multifollicular.’ Amazing.
[re=646959]user-of-owls[/re]:
Serendipitous, indeed.
Most Palinwormesque, some might say.
I just gotta point out that Bachman’s Jim clearly has bigger balls that all three of Tarryl’s Jims.
#3=Jungle Jim.
[re=646959]user-of-owls[/re]: Oh my God, mine yesterday was Panbarbic.
Bachmann has the crazy strength going for her, so normally I’d say she wins. But she’s so nuts that I think she’d turn on her Jim, and while she’s busy sucking out his eyeballs with one of Palin’s cast-off bendy straws or smearing his liver on her face Tarryl and her buddies could chop her head off.
[re=646968]Oblios Cap[/re]: Very nice Conjecture!
[re=646985]Berkeley Bear[/re]: Tarryl and her buddies could chop her head off.
Only if they don’t look directly at her. Otherwise, Bachmann would be having a TV debate with a stone statue, and that could get awkward.
Fewer Jims, more djinns. (And, since swift-winged rumor reports that today is Friday, more gin.)
Look at my jimmy.
[re=646997]chaste everywhere[/re]: “more djinns” Put down the bottle, dude.
[re=646952]harry palmer[/re]: “The one thing is a bard”
So you’re saying that Jim #3 is a musician who has some thief skills, a bit of fighting ability and can cast limited mage spells who is generally considered to be the worst class?
Legs spread wide for the proper teabaggin’, yes?
Did biker-beard Jim flip us off at about 1:19? He’s my guy then. Also.
JTEG was definitely a bad move by Bachmann — she gets herself a spokesmimbo who looks like a Ryan Seacrest wannabe, and then gets outflanked by Clark’s trio of Civil War re-enactors. Michele should know if she’s gonna go whole prole, she’s gotta stick with it and not get fancy the first opportunity she has.
Tarryl’s Jims win, IMO. Bachmann’s Jim is a bowlegged twinky with a fetish for cucumbers.
[re=647043]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Civil War re-enactors, you say? In that case, I’ll look for Clark’s next video to include the teeming insight of another polyhirsutic wonder, Chilton Burr.
And in the final days a three-headed Djim roamed the land, riding a flaming Asshole, seeking whom it may devour …
Step into a slim, Jim.
Joe the Plumber. Jim the Election Guy. Newt the Nut. I’m glad our campaigns don’t have any those complicated “ideas” and “decisions” anymore. Leaves more time for blog commenting.
Ad is annoying and didn’t like. Wonkette commenters can make better ads that would tarnish Bachmann good. Don’t play footsie if you want to win, Tarrrylll.
Vote Tarryl Clark. Because batshyt crazy is no way to go through life.
I don’t care who wins the fight as long as they play the music from Tarryl’s ad in the background.
[re=646942]harry palmer[/re]: I have it on good authority that heaven is a place where nothing — nothing — ever happens.
The definitive answer to Lauri’s question awaits Neilist’s comparative evaluation of their heat.
And, BTW, the whatcha-callit supertitle is fucking gold.
[re=646934]JMP[/re]: hahahaha best slogan ever.
and wait. does michelllepac get to be a player in the rasslin match?
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