Team Wonkette all went to bed last night before the returns from America’s Icebox came in, so they didn’t have time to report the SHOCKING ANTI-INCUMBENT NEWS that hated creep Lisa Murkowski may well be defeated by the immaculately stubbled, Tim James campaign ad-imitating Joe Miller in the Republican primary! Miller is up by 4 percentage points with 77 percent of the vote counted. He didn’t have a lot of money to spend, but he did have Sarah Palin’s endorsement, which is more valuable than a treasure chest full of Spanish doubloons. [WP]- Speaking of creeps, child kidnapper Ben Quayle will be bringing his unsettling, affectless stylings to the general election, as he won a crowded GOP primary in Arizona’s third congressional district. “Quayle made a brief appearance at Republican headquarters in Phoenix late Tuesday, making a quick statement and then quickly leaving the room as reporters shouted questions,” obviously. [AP]
- In normal political discourse as has existed for more than two centuries, someone who wants to replace a monarchical system of government with a republic that has an elected head of state is called a “republican.” However, some people in Sweden who want to get rid of their king are thinking of picking a different name, because they are afraid of being mistaken for supporters of dumb slobs John McCain and Sarah Palin. [NYT]
- The weather in Martha’s Vineyard is too crappy to play golf, so Barack Obama has been forced to read a book for entertainment. [WP]
May 27, 2012
Lisa Murkowski FIGHTING FOR HER LIFE!!!!! (Not Literally)
by Josh Fruhlinger 8:41 am August 25, 2010
{ 27 comments }
The Swedes should just name themselves what they are: “The Hot Blonde Bikini Clad Party.”
Derek Vinyard gives a thumbs up to your alt-spelling of “Martha’s Vineyard”.
“The members discussed a name change for the Republican Association, so as not to be confused with the party of John McCain and Sarah Palin, Ms. Broshammar said. ”
Apparently they’ve chosen to call tehmselves the Teabag-Bircher-Birther-Truther-National-Socialist-People’s party.
Saw a recent photo of both Quales, proud father and son, standing together and smiling that blissful, oafish smile that adorns most idiots. All I could think of was movie titles: Dumb and Dumber, Dumb and Dumberer. MUST-CLEANSE-BRAIN! MUST CLEANSE BRAIN!
Palin, McCain, Quayle jr….
We’re *SO* doomed.
-B
[re=645011]Baldar T Flagass[/re]: Sorry, I didn’t realize that these elitists lived on an island that was LITERALLY a yard of vines.
Is Palin’s endorsement really more valuable than a pleasure chest full of Spanish dildos? Holy Teabagger, Batman!
[re=645016]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: Only a yard? Sounds crowded.
Nice Sears background in that photo.
Palin and Murkowski, America’s Iceboxes.
Speaking of a chest of Spanish dildos, such a thing was quite literally the occasion for the 3rd Earl of Rochester’s “To Seignor Dildo.” Seems that a crate had been burned as “contraband.”
Sarah Palin’s endorsement, on the other hand, is probably worth quite a bit less than a dessicated walrus scrotum when compared to a low turn out, an incumbent who has had time to offend the “independent” people of Alaska who get more money from the feds than any on earth, and the chance to vote for a “normal name” for the people who register as Republicans.
What happened to the gap between her two front teeth and those nutso blue eyes? Oh … Scratch that.
[re=645016]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: Meh, they should call it “Island Where Everything is Obscenely Overpriced.”
Wow, Alaskans actually had a Republican who was fairly thoughtful and, while a blood relative of absolute corruption, not particularly corrupt and they’re going to get rid of her. Sounds about right for the State and party that produced Sarah Palin.
[re=645029]Terry[/re]:
Except her entitled airs. And the fact that she got her seat thanks to daddykins.
Considering the “quality” (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA) of GOPers that come out of Alaska, she was the least shitty turd.
I, for one, welcome our new hydrocephalic overlords.
Thanks for the reminder that, like with “freedom”, the conservatives have also managed to ruin a good word with positive meaning with “republican”. It’s ironic, in the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea sense, that the party with that name is the one that now advocates for a return to feudalism.
Lisa Murkowski may save her LITERAL life by losing this struggle for her political life — former senators don’t need to keep flying around Alaska in puddle jumpers. Although it didn’t work out too well for Uncle Ted.
Twatwaffle and Political Potentate Chuck Todd over at the NBSea says for any and all incumbents to be successful in Blovember they must follow Walnutz’ campaign play book 24/7.
1. Go negative all the time, have yer 527s go totally crazyass negative
2. Never ever talk about what their record or what they did
3. Say your opponent is a (pick one or all): incompetent, pawn of special interests, huckster
4. Na, #3s are too boring go with: rabid fapist, muslin, Nazi, communist,
fascistmost voters don’t know what one of those really is, pedophile, rapist, wants to invade Iceland to capture their weapons of ash distruction…Hope, for once, Chuckie is right. That could make for a very Wonkettery general election!! Just picture on the teevee with a Washington State mountain meadow with grazing angoras. A guy wearing hip boots has back to the camera and is strolling toward the herd. A solemn straight-laced deep voice is saying “Dino Rossi sodomizes goats…”
[re=645011]Baldar T Flagass[/re]: [re=645016]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: Why do do they pronounce it “Vinyard” when it’s clear from the spelling it should be “Vine Yard”, anyway? But then, this is the same state that thinks Worcester is pronounced “Woostah”, so a little consistency between written and spoken language may be too much to ask.
[re=645032]ManchuCandidate[/re]:
That’s how they roll in Alaska. You can’t make it to a major office without being appointed to it or kind to a previous major office holder or both. So much for independence on the final frontier and all.
[re=645051]weejee[/re]: You’ve got that exactly right. It’s going to be NegaNovember.
[re=645015]Bianchi Bob[/re]: Doomed to endless comedy on the ride down. Enjoy the collapse of civilization as long as it’s happening.
[re=645051]weejee[/re]: Dino Rossi is going to get savagely pegged by Patty Murray. Looking forward to that douchebag getting beaten 3 times in row. Next he’ll lose when he tries to run for dogcatcher.
Today on NPR, Tina Brown was doing that thing where she talks? And she said something about Britain post-whatever war it was, and made a comment like “This was when Britain LITERALLY lost the flower of its youth.” Were rose gardens for young people destroyed or something?
[re=645177]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: He will be squashed like a fucking bug, and I will laugh and laugh and laugh.
Murky got what she deserved. She was a moderate repug who got scared by the teabaggers and decided to go way far right during the primary campaign. Problem was her record didn’t back up her new stance and she made any moderate independents puke with her teabaggy talk so she lost those votes. Great strategy!
Another feather in Sarah Palin’s cap. And actually, we are “doomed” right now and we are going downhill fast, so whomever can turn this ship around, I say go for it. Barry Soetoro is a disaster. He is not interested in making anybody happy but himself.
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