MISS HIM YET TROOPSIES?  4:20 pm August 20, 2010

Here’s America’s Hero George W. Bush Shaking People’s Hands At Airport

by Jack Stuef

Is it possible to win an Oscar for best musical selection in a YouTube video? Because this is perfect. Thank you George W. Bush, from the bottom of all our hearts, for winning the Iraq War this week.

He looks so fucking relaxed. Damnit. Can’t you be tortured by at least one decision you made as president?

After a long war, our troops knew they were finally home when they saw George W. Bush using them for a photo op. [YouTube]

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Hola wonkerados.

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Hiking the Appalachian Trail August 20, 2010 at 4:26 pm

Clearly Barack Obama is not the patriot that Dubya is. If Barack was half the patriot that Dubya is, he would be at that airport. Obviously, Barack hates the troops and hates America. Also, its clear that Dubya has nothing to do now that he is no longer prez.

Autochthon August 20, 2010 at 4:26 pm

Jesus. Is that the Joker next to him?

you didn't ask, but August 20, 2010 at 4:26 pm

Them some weird looking motherfuckers…Jeebus.

The soldier looks like he has seen some shit, Bush has his usual jocular cluelessness and Laura like she fell in a vat of acid. Yeesh.

WHAT? August 20, 2010 at 4:28 pm

I mistook the shower of affection for pissing away our future.

Cape Clod August 20, 2010 at 4:28 pm

Instead of “a shower of affection,” perhaps the title should say, “pissing on our troops to the very end.”

rafflesinc August 20, 2010 at 4:29 pm

Is that a bra underneath Laura’s see through shirt? But oh look, Michelle is wearing shorts!

JMP August 20, 2010 at 4:30 pm

Sorry ’bout that PTSD there!

queeraselvis v 2.0 August 20, 2010 at 4:31 pm

[re=643005]Autochthon[/re]: Bwahahaha.

FMA August 20, 2010 at 4:32 pm

Laura’s expression says, something like, “Jesus Christ, keep smiling and ignore those spiders crawling up your thigh. WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE BATS DOING HERE?!”

imissopus August 20, 2010 at 4:32 pm

Got to all of 1:00 before I wanted to claw my eyeballs out of my head.

Lascauxcaveman August 20, 2010 at 4:35 pm

[re=643014]rafflesinc[/re]: I think it was Lenny Bruce who said the only chicks that wear see-through blouses are the ones you don’t really wanna see…

Aurelio August 20, 2010 at 4:36 pm

George is getting a big gut. Needs moar brush clearing.

BadKitty August 20, 2010 at 4:36 pm

[re=643023]imissopus[/re]: Didn’t even make it that far – just :47. I admire your strength.

One Yield Regular August 20, 2010 at 4:37 pm

I’m pretty totally completely utterly certain that George W. Bush is the very last person in the world I’d wanna to see in front of me if I were arriving home after x-number of endlessly extended tours of duty in Iraq.

V572625694 August 20, 2010 at 4:37 pm

Is the title of that song “Everybody’s Home”? That can’t be true.

WadISay August 20, 2010 at 4:38 pm

I hope Bush does his “lookin’ fur weapons uv mass destruction” gag for these guys.

MOG August 20, 2010 at 4:38 pm

I think that’s a cardboard Laura, showing too much emotion for the real thing.

Prommie August 20, 2010 at 4:38 pm

Did anyone else see Laura Bush’s odd blinking? I suddenly realized, it was morse code, she was sending messages, I was able to make out “someone, help me, they keep me chained in the basement, the drugs, so hard to think, help me.”

BlueStateLiberal August 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm

How come Dubya is so fat now?!

BadKitty August 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm

Heh heh heh. Sorry ’bout all that killing and maiming and stuff. No hard feelings, right fellas? Heh heh.

Extemporanus August 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm

Worst. “Soul Train Line”. Ever.

just pixels August 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm

This would have been the right time to drag out that “mission accomplished” banner. Meaning, of course, that the “shower of affection” mission had been accomplished by the fire trucks. Iraq is pretty much the way we found it. (But wasn’t that special, sending the troops through a mini-Katrina on their way to baggage claim.)

Bush’s camouflage was obviously meant to make him blend in with the other dorky outfits you see in an airport. But it didn’t work. He’d only blend in at an Alfred E. Neuman look-a-like convention.

Meanwhile, is it just possible that one of those soldiers told Shrub he wanted that last seven years of his life back?

Limeylizzie August 20, 2010 at 4:40 pm

Laura needs to befriend a gay man, none of my homo friends would have let me out of the house in that ensemble…the old lady Playtex bra which is not giving enough uplift and the shirt which is the same colour as her skin- greige? To say nothing of the face-lift , she looks like a clubbed seal.He looks like a cunt , as usual.

Dashboard_Buddha August 20, 2010 at 4:42 pm

Laura strikes a blow for all of those full-figured gals out there.

Hiking the Appalachian Trail August 20, 2010 at 4:42 pm

Is it just me or between the weight and tan does George look like he is laying by the pool eating bon bons all day now.

Dashboard_Buddha August 20, 2010 at 4:43 pm

Also…Laura seems to rockin’ the Kabuki.

SayItWithWookies August 20, 2010 at 4:43 pm

The same idiots who don’t want a mosque next to the WTC site let Dubya do this without a protest. But then if people were consistent and sensible we wouldn’t have a use for religion.

Berkeley Bear August 20, 2010 at 4:44 pm

I wonder if they pre-screened the vets the way they used to pre-screen his audiences. Because I have a feeling there are more than a few folks coming home who’d like to inflict a traumatic brain injury on W.

And Laura as Goth is some scary shit.

harry palmer August 20, 2010 at 4:44 pm

They named that airport after him without any fanfare(Dumb Fuck W). Can’t wait til they open the DFW Lie-barry.

Dashboard_Buddha August 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm

Someone kill me now! I looked at the Jenna Jamison picture and thought of breasts and sex, then looked at Laura’s bra picture and suddenly had an image of George doin’ Laura porn style on the Oval Office desk.

I’m going home now and poor liquor directly into my brain.

Way Cool Larry August 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm

The war was a disaster and simply horrible, Bush is a psychopath and an asshole, the troops must be totally fucked up from what they’ve been through, but still, it is somehow all very fitting here; this is sort of touching in a weirdly twisted way.

Prommie August 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm

I’m thinking that there is a future for those three, right there in that picture, in movies. You could write a series of comic shorts, they would play a threesome of hilarious bumblers, a slapstick sorta thing. You could call the “The Three, . . .,” oh, I just can’t come up with a good name, the three somethings, The Three Goons? The Three Buffoons?

Dashboard_Buddha August 20, 2010 at 4:47 pm

poor=pour – spell fail.

FMA August 20, 2010 at 4:48 pm

[re=643037]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: Budweiser: It’s just not for breakfast anymore!

FMA August 20, 2010 at 4:50 pm

[re=643055]Dashboard_Buddha[/re]: Jesus, now I’m going to have to go home and start drinking…I was planning to do that anyway, but still…

binarian August 20, 2010 at 4:52 pm

[re=643005]Autochthon[/re]: She’s definitely looking like an extra on some vampire movie.

Itsjustme August 20, 2010 at 4:53 pm

[re=643005]Autochthon[/re]: He is the Joker.

chaste everywhere August 20, 2010 at 4:54 pm

No hand-job jokes this time? But as Dashboard Buddha notes, Jenna J. is still right there beside them, same as before.

ella August 20, 2010 at 4:55 pm

All these years and nobody ever told Laura you don’t wear a white bra under a white shirt unless you want it to show like that?

Extemporanus August 20, 2010 at 4:56 pm

[re=643033]V572625694[/re]: Someone should’ve stood next to Bush while dressed as a chauffeur and holding up a sign bearing the names of every single man and woman who rode home from the airport in the back of a black stretch hearse.

Suds McKenzie August 20, 2010 at 4:56 pm

Wheres the Banner?

… and why is Michael Jackson there?

queeraselvis v 2.0 August 20, 2010 at 4:56 pm

[re=643023]imissopus[/re]: 1:42 before I was overcoming with the mawkishness. Mind you, the soldier sporting the HUGE diamonique earring was definitely TV worth watching.

Dashboard_Buddha August 20, 2010 at 4:58 pm

[re=643073]Extemporanus[/re]: That would have been cool. To bad anyone not thoroughly vetted by the SS wouldn’t have been allowed within 100 yards of the prez.

harry palmer August 20, 2010 at 4:58 pm

[re=643042]Limeylizzie[/re]: “He looks like a cunt , as usual.”

Please don’t be so unfair to cunts.

Suds McKenzie August 20, 2010 at 4:59 pm

They were greeted at the “Low Hanging Fruit” terminal.

ohh, and p.s isnt this story like 1.5 weeks old, jeepers


miquonranger03 August 20, 2010 at 4:59 pm

And, of course, Laura Bush is already ready for Halloween; here, she is showing off her Marcel Marceau costume.

steverino247 August 20, 2010 at 5:00 pm

/snark off

What really amazed me was W had that same stupid grin on his face when he went to Walter Reed or one of the other hospitals treating HIS wounded. In every fucking picture! I saw General Abizaid putting Purple Hearts on guys at Walter Reed who were never going to walk again (because of W’s sending them to get hurt AND refusing to allow the stem cell research that might one day figure out how to repair their injuries) or who were literally missing huge parts of their skulls. It was obvious it was tough duty for him. He was moved by what he saw, spent time with them and their families and if you needed something you knew you could call him and get results.

This asshole, W, just fucking grins. Anybody who voted for him, especially the second time, should spend a year getting shot at in Afghanistan or Iraq. Or cleaning bedpans at a VA hospital with their tongues. My choice.


/snark on

Hedley Lamar August 20, 2010 at 5:01 pm

NO! Don’t let the streams cross!

Baby who ate the Dingo August 20, 2010 at 5:05 pm

Looking at “W” makes me grateful that National got Reagan’s name instead of his. Mind you, I think Reagan was the second worst president ever, so that’s like posting on Facebook that you got some hot sex over the weekend, and your grandmother pops a comment in saying she’s glad you liked her see through Laura blouse.

slappypaddy August 20, 2010 at 5:06 pm

forty-six seconds was all i could hang of that. what were the firetrucks about at the beginning, were they hosing all the bullshit down? it’s a sterling tribute to our servicemen and servicewomen that they didn’t gun down that smirking little piece of shit right on the spot—”welcome my ass home, motherfucker? welcome this!”

not that i would ever propound violence against a president of the united states, no matter how much of a worthless simian abortion he might have proven to be. that pathetic excuse for a human being needs to crawl its ass back to texas and under some desert rock, along with all the other vile vermin.

JohnnyMeatworth August 20, 2010 at 5:14 pm

Why isn’t there a double rainbow over the landing plane? And where the hell is Steven Slater? There is NO WAY this will become a youtube hit!

teebob2000 August 20, 2010 at 5:15 pm

It looks like the firetrucks are giving our heroes a golden shower. Why do they hate America?

slappypaddy August 20, 2010 at 5:20 pm

[re=643053]harry palmer[/re]: laughed till my eyes peed.

UncleTom August 20, 2010 at 5:22 pm

What’s Woody Harrelson doing in uniform. I thought he was this big stoner anti-war guy.

Extemporanus August 20, 2010 at 5:26 pm

[re=643053]harry palmer[/re]: The last time I flew through there, I stole an engraved plaque off an information desk which reads “DFW AMBASSADOR”.

Does that make me a member of the former Bush administration?

disgustedcitizen August 20, 2010 at 5:26 pm

Wow, what’s with Laura’s makeup? Has she enrolled in clown college?

Kane August 20, 2010 at 5:27 pm

Which one is Pat Tillman?

Army of None August 20, 2010 at 5:28 pm

When Sarah Palin and Newt Gingrich are in office, maybe George can come back as Secretary of State and target new places for us to invade, so that this glory can continue, indefinitely.

pat robertsons personal trainer August 20, 2010 at 5:32 pm

[re=643048]Hiking the Appalachian Trail[/re]: anti-psychotics have a known side effect of weight gain.

TeddyS August 20, 2010 at 5:35 pm

Hey, President Bush, thanks for coming out to welcome us back and get all this camera time. When my buddies came back dead in coffins, you weren’t there and pix weren’t allowed, so we really appreciate you and the missues showing up this time. After you finish with the grip and grin, can we go have a beer and you can explain to me just how you managed to fuck things up so badly? Does coming home mean we have surrendered to our enemies and cut and run? Where’s Cheney, Condi, Rumsfeld and the rest of the boys?

gurukalehuru August 20, 2010 at 5:39 pm

Barry, Barry, Barry. This is what happens when you don’t put these fuckers in jail and don’t say I didn’t tell you so because I did, right here on Wonkette, but did you listen, noooooooo.

pat robertsons personal trainer August 20, 2010 at 5:40 pm

he has now attended an undefinably higher number of “welcome home” parties at dfw than iraq veteran funerals.

Jukesgrrl August 20, 2010 at 5:46 pm

This makes me want to vomit, so I’ll just focus on Laura’s kabuki make-up and see-through blouse.

ArugulaTeleprompterz August 20, 2010 at 5:47 pm

why does Laura look like a vampire? What the fuck is up with her face?

FlownOver August 20, 2010 at 5:48 pm

[re=643064]FMA[/re]: I went on the wagon decades ago, but suddenly I’m reconsidering.

FlownOver August 20, 2010 at 5:50 pm

[re=643099]Kane[/re]: Nope – still too soon.

GOPCrusher August 20, 2010 at 5:54 pm

Jesus H. Christ! Pickles looks like death.

Cookie Guggelman August 20, 2010 at 5:55 pm

Fuck that guy. I’m not watching. I’m going to read about how smoking can be healthy instead.

joementum August 20, 2010 at 5:59 pm

Wrong war and all,but the movie Restrepo is HIGHLY worth watching. It’s playing in limited release right now.


Read the book by the co-director, too. Damn fine mess we’re in…

Tarangela August 20, 2010 at 6:00 pm

Is that a fucking paper cut out of Laura? George–what the hell did you do to her?!

Oldskool August 20, 2010 at 6:06 pm

So why does he assume everyone on the plane wanted to have their pic taken beside him unless it was arranged ahead of time. Which makes you wonder how many thousands refused to volunteer for photo-op duty.

Min2.0 August 20, 2010 at 6:11 pm

What lipstick color is Laura wearing…Vampire Blood?

Dave J. August 20, 2010 at 6:14 pm

I love the opening. Ah, water…the world’s most precious natural resource. Yo, check it, you 3rd world motherfuckers–we are using it to literally spray over our massive 747s returning soldiers home from a horrible war of occupation! Wheeeee!

bflrtsplk August 20, 2010 at 6:24 pm

[re=643130]Tarangela[/re]: Ever hear of the movie “The Stepford Wives.

W: Son, for a job well done, we don’t think you should go home empty handed. As a reward for your service to your country, here are two one-way tickets to …. BAGHDAD! Haw haw haw.

ArugulaTeleprompterz August 20, 2010 at 6:31 pm

Dubya’s ass is so flat and wide it looks like he sat on a bologna slicer.

Accordion-o-rama August 20, 2010 at 6:34 pm

[re=643029]Aurelio[/re]: George is getting a big gut.

Means there’s some big decisionatin’ to do!

My Turn August 20, 2010 at 6:35 pm

I used to look that fucking relaxed, but I don’t drink anymore.

Darklady August 20, 2010 at 6:48 pm

How many of those men and women wanted to say, “Hey, thanks for getting me into this mess, ya bastard?”

Jack Stuef August 20, 2010 at 6:52 pm

[re=643078]Suds McKenzie[/re]: Yes, but the AFA sent it to us in e-mail today with the headline: “BREAKING VIDEO: Video.” So it’s breaking. BREAKING.

An American in Toronto August 20, 2010 at 7:13 pm

Do the soldiers then have to go buy their overpriced souvenir picture with Dipshit McGee like you have to do at Niagara Falls?

Suds McKenzie August 20, 2010 at 7:20 pm

[re=643181]Jack Stuef[/re]: Maybe I just need a more linear view of time, … Like Sharron Angle.

lawrenceofthedesert August 20, 2010 at 7:22 pm

They’re firemen, so they sprayed water — thank goodness they weren’t sanitation workers!

Shrubbie does a very credible imitation of Bud the Walmart greeter. But three minutes in, I got diabetes from the music and had to terminate the vid before it ruined my weekend. My conclusion: GOP behavior is strong evidence of parallel universes theory.

Justin Time August 20, 2010 at 7:52 pm

I sort of recognize the clueless fratboy. Is the dame to his left the star of “Memories of a Geisha”?

Mr. Spanky August 20, 2010 at 8:01 pm

[last lines]
Patton: [voiceover]: ” For over a thousand years, Roman conquerors returning from the wars enjoyed the honor of a triumph – a tumultuous parade. In the procession came trumpeters and musicians and strange animals from the conquered territories, together with carts laden with treasure and captured armaments. The conqueror rode in a triumphal chariot, the dazed prisoners walking in chains before him. Sometimes his children, robed in white, stood with him in the chariot, or rode thei trace horses. A slave stood behind the conqueror, holding a golden crown, and whispering in his ear a warning: that all glory is fleeting.”

I think it is nice that W welcomed back a few of his soldiers who were coerced into fighting his Imperialist Wars of Aggression.

Laura, on the other hand, looks like she could do a guest spot on “True Blood”.

Extemporanus August 20, 2010 at 8:32 pm

[re=643200]Suds McKenzie[/re]: The time at which Jack posted this story might offer some insight into its perplexing temporal abnormalities.

The 3-Legged Man August 20, 2010 at 8:38 pm

Is it Jeb Bush who has the hot wife? We should elect him.

Maus August 20, 2010 at 8:53 pm

[re=643232]Mr. Spanky[/re]: “Laura, on the other hand, looks like she could do a guest spot on “True Blood”.”

I would say she’s more “LOVE THAT JOKER!”

Apparently someone already beat me to it…

rocktonsammy August 20, 2010 at 9:26 pm

You can see right through the Joker’s blouse.

Nice rake babe.

Jr. has a gut, also.

momus August 20, 2010 at 9:54 pm

No suit and tie, no American flag lapel pin, just the Bilderburg emblem on his polo shirt what kind of respect is that?

GaySailor August 20, 2010 at 10:16 pm

WELCOME HOME!!! Here ya go, fellers! Shake the hand of the boob who said it was all gonna be a big cake walk!

SayItWithWookies August 20, 2010 at 10:51 pm

[re=643232]Mr. Spanky[/re]: Notice that he only welcomed back the living. A real president would’ve welcomed back the soldiers who died, too. Oh wait — one did.

Servo August 20, 2010 at 10:59 pm

Welcome back from destitution to…destitution. Lay down your burdens and weary bones in the comfy accommodations of any one of our numerous tent cities. Unemployed? Injured? Traumatized? Sorry. The Teabaggers “Support Our Troops” only if it doesn’t cost more than a yellow ribbon magnet. Why should they pay any more? After all, you swore an oath to be sacrificed to protect their Constitutional right of greed and selfishness.
I guess they truly didn’t want you back. They’ll pay for all the tools you need (provided by the lowest bidder, of course) to keep the fight going for eternity, but are unable to afford your adjustment back to civilian life. You were destined to be a Christian martyr. Thank Real America.
You go from Hero to Bum as soon as you’re handed your DD-214.

Don’t forget your surgical gloves for shaking hands, George.


Custersdeadhorse August 20, 2010 at 11:46 pm

Instead of Archie Bunker and Edith greeting the last combat troops to DFW with a handshake, Queen Cunt from Alaska should have been there with Trig and her Faux News mike asking them how they felt about the Black man wanting them to shower with the gays and what do they think of a mosque being built next door to Ground Zoro? FOX would then have their talking points to ask on the Sunday morning talking heads programs.
A goody bag would have been nice too. Laura could have handed them a dozen eggs from Iowa and a pound of steamed shrimp from the Gulf courtesy of the Smaller Government movement because free enterprise knows how to regulate itself far better than Washington.
Where were Babs and Barney?

Diana Davies August 21, 2010 at 12:12 am

[re=643042]Limeylizzie[/re]: As a cunt myself, I resent your implication.

SurfRider August 21, 2010 at 6:02 am

Laura’s workin’ that Joker look.

mayor_quimby August 21, 2010 at 6:33 am

Inside the minds of greeted troops: “This fuckin guy! Sent me to the fuckin desert to get blown up for no discernible reason! Gotta love this fuckin guy. Hand me my fake leg” /goodfellas accent.

Larry McAwful August 21, 2010 at 9:14 am

Cripes–those guys must’ve had to mortgage their own houses to pay for those carry-ons.

I wonder if Bush called ahead to make sure all the soldiers coming off the plane still had all their limbs attached?

Egregious August 21, 2010 at 9:35 am


Jebus, no joke. Enough with the all the “Nobama” joker posters. W better watch out that he doesn’t get a No. 2 pencil jamed in his eye socket.

tribbzthesquidz August 21, 2010 at 9:43 am

[re=643122]Cookie Guggelman[/re]: Smoking can be healthy?

Neilist August 21, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Why isn’t that USELESS, STUPID, HYPOCRITICAL MOTHERFUCKER meeting the caskets as they come off the cargo ramp?

[Sorry. That just slipped out.

My bad.]


Acting Director
GOP/NRA Wonkette Outreach Program

rmjag August 21, 2010 at 7:15 pm

[re=643005]Autochthon[/re]: i think its whats left of laura , but what is that kabuki mask shit all over her face ? has george been powdering his ass again ? that would explain all the weird blinking she’s doing too …………………

SmallPotatoes August 22, 2010 at 10:33 am

Apparently, the sun never shines on Laura Bush.

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jus_wonderin August 23, 2010 at 12:11 pm

My god, does this man hang out at DFW constantly? We need to find a job for W.

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