republicans in the news

Marg Baker Will Put You In a Tent City

Your friendly internment camp counselorRepublican Florida state house candidate Marg Baker has won the Internet celebrity sweepstakes for suggesting that Florida send illegal immigrants “out to the middle of the country and put up high walls and leave them there.” You know, get ‘em off the streets, make ‘em disappear. Like the “e” in her name! Seriously, where did the “e” go?

And is “Marg” pronounced with a hard “g,” like “MARGH!” Or is it a soft “g”? Whichever the case, Baker made angry teevee liberal Keith Olbermann go “ARGH!!,” and now he has declared her a “worst person in the world.” But maybe he’s just not listening! Because as Baker told Salon, people are misinterpreting her ideas:

“They’re trying to think I want to erect some sort of prison camps like over in Germany” — which she is not, Baker said.

Asked if what she had in mind was more like the Japanese internment camps of the World War II era, Baker said, “something like that. But unfortunately in the Japanese camps they detaineed American citiziens. The only ones I want to detain are the ones who are illegal.”

She added, “You’ve gotta have places for them to eat and sleep and breathe fresh air. It can be a tent city … You don’t want to make them too comfortable or they’ll want to come back.”

Sounds like a motel your Wonkette stayed at many years ago — not inviting, per se, yet functional. It wasn’t a tent, though; it had HVAC and electricity. And a nice swimming pool! Will the immigrant city have a pool? Hope not — they probably don’t make those “Keep the ‘P’ out of our ‘pool’” signs in the Spanish language.

A look at Baker’s campaign website suggests that she might be softening her stance when speaking to the media. On the page titled Illegal Aliens ‘O’ TOLERANCE!!!, she lists reasons why we shouldn’t put up with those people. They trade weapons! They are whores!

5. And more[!]

Traded weapons and hooking are bad! Therefore, illegals “should not mingle among the people,” she told the St. Petersburg Times.

Baker suggests that Florida adopt an Arizona-style anti-immigration bill, and she’s in luck! Florida Attorney General Bill McCollum has introduced one, with all the unconstitutionality of SB 1070, plus maybe even harsher conditions. (McCollum learned all about the dangers of hookers from Christian rent-boy renter George Rekers, whom he hired as an expert once.)

Baker’s opponents say they don’t support her whole “internment camps” initiative, because they are afraid of Keith Olbermann. [Marg Baker's website/Salon/St. Petersburg Times/Huffington Post]

About the author

Lauri works at the Chicago Reader, and also writes and makes art-pictures for Wonkette. Her creative projects—including a now-defunct blog about finding clothing in the trash and wearing it, and an exhibition of portraits of all 50 Chicago aldermen made by 50 different artists—have been featured by NBC's Today Show, the New York Times, Chicago Tribune, BUST Magazine, and other media outlets. She's written things for the Austin Chronicle, Texas Observer, In Pittsburgh Weekly, The Black Table, and other places, and taken photos for various nonprofits, bands, and publications. (She also has a law degree, for some reason.)

View all articles by Lauri Apple
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67 comments

  1. AnnieGetYourFun

    “Republican Florida state house candidate…” aaaaannd that’s as far as I had to read.

  2. nappyduggs

    My goodness but that Jonathan Winters just really gets all up and inside of his characterizations.

    Unbelievably well wrought, this thing is.

  3. ArkansasFred

    1 DAY Vote

    We now have 15 days available to cast our votes in most general elections.

    This costs our county and the entire state too much money. Think about it, 15 days does cost more than 1 day.

    Makes sense to me…..you know the rest.

  4. user-of-owls

    Marg would poll much better if she dropped another letter, specifically the first “n” in “internment camps.”

  5. stew

    At some point the “Daily Wingnut Whack-Off” will get boring. I mean if they said the Obamas were having a three-way with satan (we’ll have the pictures any day now!), it wouldn’t really phase me.

  6. Texan Bulldoggette

    “You’ve gotta have places for them to eat and sleep and breathe fresh air. It can be a tent city … You don’t want to make them too comfortable or they’ll want to come back.”

    Umm….has anyone ever seen her or Joe Arpaio in the same room together???

  7. edgydrifter

    Floridians should be very comfortable and familiar with the concept of camps like this. From Seminoles to snowbirds, many Floridians have exciting “camp stories” to tell from their very own families! And remember, “trabajo” is Mexican for “arbeit.”

  8. SayItWithWookies

    “Also, if all the passengers got on the outside of the plane and flapped, we wouldn’t have to spend so much money on aviation fuel, and we could achieve energy independence!”

  9. samsuncle

    Hey Marg! Those oranges aren’t going to pick themselves… maybe we, ugh, could fence them in an orange grove. Yeah, that’s the solution.

  10. pirate king of the Jews

    Tent Cities! Tent cities for illegals while our brave veterans are living in cardboard boxes down by the railroad tracks!!! Why does Marg hate veterans?

  11. montresor

    God amighty. These thugs. Louder and more shrill by the minute. They seem to be everywhere, and their filters are full off. It’s just a 24/7 barrage of willfully and proudly ignorant racist cant. I can’t even laugh anymore. Though I will admit, I too was recently entertaining a thought about internment similar to hers, but instead for American Nazis, white supremacists, intolerant christianists and that wretched crew of Snopeses who call themselves the Tea Party. But yes, I’m way past laughing at these people.

  12. BOOBIES!

    The motto of the 21st Century GOP should simply be, “Brown people are icky. Now, get the fuck outta here!”

  13. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=638300]weejee[/re]: Hee hee…I was just thinking you can put lipstick (or earrings) on a pig, but it’s still a pig.

  14. user-of-owls

    [re=638277]user-of-owls[/re]: Second “n”, you imbecile. SECOND. As in “inter-ment camps.” As in “way to fuck up a barely serviceable joke in the first place.”

    *maaargh”

  15. Serolf Divad

    Swimming pools would give them a place to practice for when they decide swim back over after we’ve deported them.

  16. AnnieGetYourFun

    The RCMP had a great idea in Saskatoon a while back – they were driving disorderly (and drunken) First Nations men out to the outskirts of town, thinking that by the time they walked back into the city, they would be sober. This worked really well, except for the ones that froze to death, because they were doing this during the winter.

    I can see something similar working for our Messicans, except they seem to like the heat, amiright?

  17. JMP

    Looking at the St. Petersburg Times article, I wonder how Marg thinks a camp that people aren’t allowed to leave functionally differs from a prison. It is good to see that she’s too far for even the other Republicans in the race, though. Oh, and check out the comments – she joins in there.

  18. Cicada

    Marg Baker is just doing her part to prove Godwin’s Law. There’s no way internet discussions about this aren’t going to involve Nazi comparisons. Of course, they’re apt Nazi comparisons, but still.

  19. queeraselvis v 2.0

    Dear Marg:

    Spell check is your friend. Why don’t y’all get reacquainted?

    Also, I realize you’re in Florida, but the whole leathery grizzled look is so 1982.

    Much love,

    QAE v 2.0

  20. Native of SL UT

    I am not for this at all.
    Well, except for maybe the tent city of whores. That would make them easier to find.

  21. GeneralLerong

    [re=638300]weejee[/re]: Thanks, weejee. I was trying to figure out why that face seemed so familiar. Ted in drag as a smug lady yachtie. Oh keelhauling, keelhauling, and hoisting by the yardarm, where have those quaint pastimes gone, alack?

    Oh. You were thinking a length of polypro and “shark chum.” Well, that would be OK, too, I guess. So long as they eat it all.

  22. Limeylizzie

    [re=638306]user-of-owls[/re]: Glad you corrected that as I spent a few minutes trying to work out what the hell you were going on about and came to the conclusion that you had actually made a joke that was so esoteric and clever that I simply didn’t get it.

  23. Extemporanus

    “ATTENTION ILLEGALS: We don’t swim in your internment camp, so please don’t pee in our country!”

  24. McDuff

    Hey Marg, check it out, ICE already has over 50 detention centers up and running, and some have “tents” — http://www.ice.gov/pi/dro/facilities.htm — the Willacy center in Raymondville, TX is visible from US 77 and consists largely of non-permanent structures and some are in the “middle of the country” too!

  25. Dashboard_Buddha

    “She added, “You’ve gotta have places for them to eat and sleep and breathe fresh air. It can be a tent city … You don’t want to make them too comfortable or they’ll want to come back.””

    Come back WHERE? They’re already HERE!

    The crazy…it burns!

  26. iwillsavethispatient

    So, when Marg hears there’s an illegal immigration problem, she thinks the problem is that they have no-where to stay?

    Marg: I can’t believe she’s not butter.

  27. Elephants Gerald

    [re=638306]user-of-owls[/re]: Is there anything better for one’s self of steam than a good calrification comment? I don’t think so.

  28. CapnFatback

    “Illegal Aliens ‘O’ TOLERANCE!!!”

    I see, the “O” acts like a heart symbol in that sentence, but instead of representing love, it represents “steal jobs from Americans and drop crack-addicted anchor babies who will use their tasty chimichungas to anally rape our.”

  29. Lascauxcaveman

    From the picture, I’m guessing Marg lives on a 32-ft fibreglas cabin cruiser that hasn’t left the dock in 25 years and reeks of stale tobacco and cat pee.

  30. DemmeFatale

    So, will this be like Burning Man without the “art?”

    (I love how she wears dangly earrings so we know she’s a girl.)

  31. just pixels

    This is a little too easy, but she’s from Florida so I have to grade on a curve.

    Instead of sending them on a nice camping vacation, why not just send them home. I mean once we’ve rounded ‘em up, which is (of course) the easy part.

    Anyway instead of having them all laze about on the taxpayers nickel like a bunch of socialists, we should put these illegals to work while they’re in the camp. Tell them it’s a way to earn their citizenship. Because, you know, arbeit macht frei.

  32. user-of-owls

    [re=638326]Limeylizzie[/re]: Making you puzzle over my retard moment was sort of esoteric and clever, no? *kicks self in “n”‘s*

    [re=638406]Elephants Gerald[/re]: For all intensive purposes, no.

  33. slithytoves

    “Graduate:
    * Chicago Institute of Accounting
    * St Pete JC, Assoiate of Arts degree”

    St. Pete Junior College is calling – they want their assoiate degree back.

  34. Decker

    the middle of the country and put up high walls and leave them there.

    Superman already tried that with Sinestro and Magog and a bunch of others. It didn’t work out too well.

  35. BOOBIES!

    [re=638446]DemmeFatale[/re]:

    “I love how she wears dangly earrings so we know she’s a girl.”

    The dangly earrings made me think he looks like Mr. Garrison, the transvestite teacher, on South Park.

  36. teebob2000

    She is easily one of the most unattractive human beings (who hasn’t been mutilated by fire or other mishap as far as I can tell) I’ve ever seen. No chance of my pup-tenting if she’s involved in any way.

  37. rmjag

    [re=638300]weejee[/re]: ted stevens didn’t die in a plane crash , he simply wanted to escape his tiresome 86 year old life before it was too late and be the drag queen he always wanted to be ….. nasty

  38. Rock Ripsnort

    [re=638407]CapnFatback[/re]: Naw, it’s like “Buckets O’ Love”, or “Big Bag O’ Bullshit” — in fact, it’s exactly like Big Bags o’ Bullshit.

  39. Jukesgrrl

    [re=638319]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: “the whole leathery grizzled look is so 1982″ Not here in Arizona. We like it so much, we made it our very own Half-Governor.

  40. schvitzatura

    Make it Erewhon Prison from the seminal 1997 John Woo gun fu classic Face/Off. It used re-purposed Star Trek magnetic boots as ankle chains for internees.

    If MARG! Baker was trying this in Massachusetts, suggesting they put up a detention facility out Fitchburg/Athol way for “really wetback” Boston micks, would the idea go over just as well?

  41. disgustedcitizen

    “… You don’t want to make them too comfortable or they’ll want to come back.”

    How the hell can they “want to come back” if you’ve got them penned up in the middle of Idaho or some place? Neocons are stupid.

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