Israel’s official daily briefing, the Atlantic Monthly, has a hot new announcement about how Israel is going to attack Iran, this coming spring, just like in the good old days of Reagan and the mujahideen. What could go wrong?! Oh, everything.
From the Atlantic‘s very long yet still terrifying cover story:
When the Israelis begin to bomb the uranium-enrichment facility at Natanz, the formerly secret enrichment site at Qom, the nuclear-research center at Esfahan, and possibly even the Bushehr reactor, along with the other main sites of the Iranian nuclear program, a short while after they depart en masse from their bases across Israel—regardless of whether they succeed in destroying Iran’s centrifuges and warhead and missile plants, or whether they fail miserably to even make a dent in Iran’s nuclear program—they stand a good chance of changing the Middle East forever; of sparking lethal reprisals, and even a full-blown regional war that could lead to the deaths of thousands of Israelis and Iranians, and possibly Arabs and Americans as well; of creating a crisis for Barack Obama that will dwarf Afghanistan in significance and complexity; of rupturing relations between Jerusalem and Washington, which is Israel’s only meaningful ally; of inadvertently solidifying the somewhat tenuous rule of the mullahs in Tehran; of causing the price of oil to spike to cataclysmic highs, launching the world economy into a period of turbulence not experienced since the autumn of 2008, or possibly since the oil shock of 1973; of placing communities across the Jewish diaspora in mortal danger, by making them targets of Iranian-sponsored terror attacks, as they have been in the past, in a limited though already lethal way; and of accelerating Israel’s conversion from a once-admired refuge for a persecuted people into a leper among nations.
Hooray? Other than maybe forcing Washington to bomb Israel (ha, right), just to defuse the situation, it seems like the sociopaths eternally running Israel’s government/military (with U.S. taxpayer money) aren’t really going to be “checked” by anyone or anything here. Born from a legitimate need to take care of themselves when nobody else was going to help, today’s Israel seems equally determined to fight its benefactors and very few allies along with every other nation on Earth.
The good news is that the Global Recession and Constant Firestorms and pandemics and starvation and 100-degree-Farenheit Christmas in the Northern Hemisphere and rampaging murderers in National Park campgrounds and a GOP-controlled House of Representatives and 90% unemployment should keep us all busy enough next year that we’ll barely notice the news of a nuclear war in the Middle East. [Atlantic Monthly]
{ 101 comments }
Armageddon! The Mayans might have been onto something.
Wow, the potential outcome is so insamnely amazingly awesome I can’t possibly imagine why Israel would not bomb Iran next spring.
Will this somehow be good for Juan McCain?
The view of rockets flying over Egypt’s great pyramids will be amazing. Can’t wait!
Stay off those small planes, Ken.
What was that “good for Israel” thing the US America did? Oh right Iraqinam. That TURNED OUT AWESOME!!!
Well, since we know that Israel has plans to attack another country, it’s time for a preëmptive strike against this new member of the Axis of Evil, right? Oh, wouldn’t it just be awesome, having Israel attacking the world’s only Shiite government, causing new instability between Sunni and Shiite sections in Iraq, as well as dragging Arab governments into the fray, and possibly leading everyone to the Plains of Armageddon for World War III?
Grab your Bibles, folks! It’s all in there! If you can’t find it in there, don’t worry–someone will be glad to tell you where to look!
When do we recall our ambassador to Magog?
Jayzus, Israel, calm the fuck down and put down the bombs. You have lobbyists for this sort of thing now.
But honestly, what sort of bizarre Alex Jones Fantasy World do modern Israelis live in, where literally every fucking thing ever is an OMGZ DIRE EXISTENTIAL THREAT U GAIZ?
Why am I thinking Cheney, neocon, Cheney, neocon? PNAC Likud Friedman Cheney neocon creative chaos? Why?
I think you mean “defuse the situation,” though I suppose bombs have the
affeffect of diffusing lots of things.Bombing Iran = Porn for Neocons.
Oh, let’s see…
The winner of Iraq II: Daddy’s Revenge was…Iran! With their huge, mortal enemy removed from their border, they had domestic security. The winner of Iraq I: I am a Spook, Not a Wimp was… Saudi Arabia! The U.S. left piles and piles and piles of advanced super weapons on Saudi soil, because it “cost too much” to bring it all back home. The fact that the U.S. was in Saudi Arabia angered the Wahabis, who then attacked the U.S. in 1992 and 2001.
So, with a stronger Iran that gets to consolidate its military and a stronger Saudi Arabia, and Egypt divided and Israel using its billions a year for “security,” this looks to be tremendously bad in all directions. (Hosea 1)
Oh, and Ken, when did you start hating the jews?
It’s neo-con porn. I feel dirty just reading it.
Calm down. The Atlantic is just running excerpts from Ross Douchehat’s Professional Left Behind series.
[re=636423]Guppy06[/re]: Yr right. I am so fucking tired.
[re=636428]Prommie[/re]: Didn’t you know that anyone who ever says, types or even thinks anything critical of political leadership in Israel has actually personally done the entire Holocaust? This is why my children fear me so much.
Bibi, like most neocons, seems to have some serious “Daddy Issues”.
huhhuhuh ,,lmao..the real question is that map. Anyone who can move Egypt from Africa to Asia has already solved the Crisis. lol
Israel is welcomed to take shop is pesky place Egypt used to occupy. sure enough they can keep the pyramids since they built it,wayback when?
No wonder Sarah Palin Can see ol’Vlad from her porch.
“the Israelis will tell their American counterparts that they are taking this drastic step because a nuclear Iran poses the gravest threat since Hitler to the physical survival of the Jewish people.”
What, Iran is gonna nuke Florida?
“Periods are over rated” -Atlantic Monthly Editor in Chief
Whoa, we invaded Iraq so good we turned it into Egypt. Can we turn Afghanistan into Egypt too? It would be WAY easier to conquer then.
[re=636435]Ken Layne[/re]: Israel repealed Godwin’s law after the 1967 war, I think it was.
Could someone remind Israel of what the Mutual part of MAD means? The Iranians know the Israelis have nukes; they’re not going to be stupid enough to nuke Jerusalem; doing so would kinda kill a lot of the Palestinians too.
[re=636441]lomri[/re]: Better we should turn it into Costa Rica.
Dear Israel:
It’s not always about you. Take a couple of Percosets with a vodka chaser, and you’ll be much better in the morning.
Kisses,
QAE v 2.0
[re=636443]JMP[/re]: The $100,000 question is just how deluded Isreal is about its own specialness and permanent-crime-justifying-victimhood status, and whether said delusions of being so special extend to believing that the world would tolerate them making a first strike if things go bad for them in a conventional war.
Oh, what the fuck am I thinking, thats not much of a question at all, is it? Of course they’re that deluded. Batshit foaming at the mouth insane, I mean.
Was that bit from the Atlantic one extremely long run-on sentence?
[re=636445]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]:
I’d suggest eating a BLT and some lobster as well.
Rockets flying over Egypt’s great pyramids won’t be very effective in hitting Iran.
Doesn’t anyone at “Fox News” look at the maps they put up?
We have been fighting a war in Iraq for 10 years, and “Fox News”
hasn’t learned where Iraq is yet.
Wonderful.
The Israel I grew up with is unfortunately, though perhaps inevitably, dead. Not surprising that so many people are reluctant to discuss the smell . . .
I’m beginning to see why Israel has gotten its ass kicked so many times throughout history.
[re=636438]thegunner[/re]: Omfg, that map just made my day. Thank invisible sky wizard for Fox News.
If it comes to the ultimate throw-down between Gog and Magog, my money is on Magog.
And they even have the Nile over there to the left!
Golly, I guess that’s Morroco?
FoxNews will even change the Earth for political purposes?
I once read an article by a former Israeli cabinent minister saying that Israeli politics are so idellibly fucked up due to their incredibly short election cycles (basically imagine if midterms were every 6 months, to get an idea of the feel of it) that no one ever plans anything, really, and that governments just do stuff it thinks will be popular without thinking it through AT ALL, and often the Prime Minister won’t consult literally ANOTHER LIVING HUMAN BEING about his plans, because they might tell someone or disagree or something, which, you can imagine, makes for FINELY-CRAFTED POLICY.
Anyway, due to that, I highly doubt the veracity of these plans because, well, they’re plans.
Why does anyone ever watch fox…ever?
And Iran has let it be known it’s digging mass graves for American soldiers, just in case. Indeed, what could possibly go wrong?
Funny, I didn’t think the Jews were so big on this whole “bring on the end times” shit; I thought that was just the retarded Christians in rural USA.
Anyhoo, state department, I’d be OK with send them less of my tax $$$ next time around, whenever that is.
I debated about commenting on this post at all since I know that there is a real possibility it’s going to end up an emotional rant, but I felt I couldn’t just ignore a lot of the comments posted here.
Look, Israel does a lot of misguided things and I’m not saying that they are perfect (by a LONG shot), but Iran poses an extremely dangerous threat to the world–Ahmadinejad has shown repeatedly that, despite Obama’s attempts at open discussion and diplomacy, he is determined to a) get nuclear weapons and b) blow a fair number of people off the face of this planet, most notably Israel itself. This makes the potential nuclear arsenal of Iran a major threat to the existence of the country. The major question is whether or not the world powers can afford to just “wait and see”–Israel simply cannot. I think that the situation is inherently different than that of Iraq–mainly because the government didn’t do their research and didn’t bother to pursue more peaceful means in the first place.
Israel very successfully bombed Iraq’s nuclear reactor back in the 80s and the plans for Iran seem similar. It seems as though Israel is doing what the other powers of the world are too afraid to consider. I’ll be interested to see what Obama’s reaction is to the release of these plans–if Israel does this successfully, it’ll be a big ole’ favor for the US because they can still come across as the reliable, strong, leader of the free world. They don’t have to get their hands dirty. I think ultimately this is why Israel, time and time again, come across as these war-crazed attack animals–so few countries are actually willing to take any form of action for fear of getting on the wrong side of their allies. I think contrary to what some have said before, Israel’s plan to attack Iran would actually reaffirm its relationship with America, instead of harming it. As for the rest of the world, Israel is already demonized so they really don’t have much to lose.
[re=636451]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: Now rebelling against the empire that ruled every single bit of land for vast distances around them was a great idea.
If it’s any consolation:
1. Seymour Hersch often reported on the Bush administration’s plans to attack Iran, and it never happened, and
2. This has momentarily taken my mind off Newt Gingrich’s peccadillos.
Feel better now? (Didn’t think so.)
Well, thank you for answering the question that was on my mind since 6:07 this morning (Should I get out of bed?) with a resounding “No.”
@Davidwatts: So Israel is run like a publicly held corporation? That would explain a lot.
[re=636481]stam487[/re]:
1) Then let the neocon war drum beaters admit that it is a Threat to Middle East Stability and Israel not Iran is the next Nazi Germany
2) Iran’s leadership is a bunch of scumbags. It’s not like anyone hear is crying “oh won’t someone please think of the mullahs?”
3) Please don’t equate the situation in 1981 to be the same as what might happen in 2010. Certain situations have changed like the fact that Iraq is a mess, US troops happen to be in between Iran and Israel and that everyone learned that Israeli airpower is, well, powerful.
4) This whole plan basically states that in order for it to succeed, the US America must share the burden and pain for Israel’s reaching out and touching Iran in a bad way. Your argument about “so few countries are actually willing to take any form of action for fear of getting on the wrong side of their allies” doesn’t really wash because the US did what Israel couldn’t do and that was invade an Arab country it considered a threat when the reality was that they were so crippled by sanctions and the dismantling of their WMD program that they couldn’t do shit.
5) As for the whole Israel is a pariah… well, it happens to be that Turkey and Egypt happen to be the closest thing the Israelis have as allies in the ME.
6) The real problem is that Israel has been thinking it’s invincible. When the shield of US America finally disappears, what is Israel going to do? It won’t be pretty.
7) Do you really think the US America has enough resources left to take on another war in the ME? The army is used up, pretty much everything needs to put on down down for rest/repair/replacement and it’s not like the US America has money.
[re=636484]WadISay[/re]: “Seymour Hersch often reported on the Bush administration’s plans to attack Iran, and it never happened”.
it never happened because the american high command revolted. the chief generals and admirals told fuhrer cheney there was no way they were going to agree to any sort of strike on iran, stretched thin as they were in iraq, afghanistan, and the rest of the world. rather than provoke the first successful uprising in america of the military against the civilian leadership, the tin-hearted dictator wannabe backed down.
unfortunately, that didn’t solve the problem of what to do about an iran armed with nuclear weapons, ballistic missiles, and an attitude that is, shall we say, unhelpful.
I hear Israel is planning on renaming Iran to “Palestine”, first, thus solving both of their half-imaginary* problems at the same time.
*To clarify- the half of these problems that’s not imaginary is also roughly 90% their own fault, but whatevs.
Ok. Once more. Back by popular demand. Here is the Ducksworthy Plan for World Peacetm
1. Invite fundamentalists of all stripes to Jerusalem to witness whatever it is they are praying for, armageddon or whatever
2. Provide free accommodations in the holy city
3. Nuke said holy city.
When did Egypt move? Or is this the Sarah Palin map of the Middle East?
They aren’t going to bomb Iran, primarily because Lebanon is a forest of missiles aimed at Israel that the IDF can do nothing effective about and the US military, with significantly more assets than the Israeli air force already looked at this problem and had to admit “we can’t daisy-cut our way out of this one”.
Think of it more as Bebe Netanyahu standing over the inert political body of Charles Krauthammer with a pair of defibrillator paddles shouting “clear!”.
The ‘publicans was ‘sposed to hate the Muslins, somehow they got turned around and ended up on the Messicans. This is just an attempt to get them to refocus, much like the “ground 0 mosque” Foxtroversy.
To paraphrase Peter, Paul & Mary, it’s long memories and short tempers that have cursed the Middle East. And Fox News’s poor grasp of geography, also.
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: No, it’s not clear at all that Ahmadinejad (much less the mullahs who actually rule Iran) is determined to develop nuclear weapons, much less actually use them rather than keep them as a defensive deterrent (now what country actually has nukes but won’t admit it and has made of noise about bombing Iran which they might feel threatened by and want the ability to defend themselves against?). Neocons and the Israeli right wing keeps asserting that as facts, but the evidence is pretty damned murky.
[re=636505]chachi[/re]: If that’s Sarah Palin’s map, where the heck is the country of Africa?
[re=636463]WadISay[/re]: No way. Team Gog rules!!!
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: Curiously enough, you glossed over the minor detail that the two most powerful militaries in the region have spent the past decade rather loudly threatening to bomb/nuke/invade Iran, which might also be why they’d be interested in developing nuclear weapons, as a deterrent and diplomatic bludgeon, just like everyone who has them except the US, because who honestly likes getting bombed/nuked/invaded?
I’m just saying, things like “Axis of Evil” and this thing Israel likes doing, where they “leak” their plans to unilaterally bomb the bejesus out of Iran, along with hints that they might do so any day at all, just out of boredom, might also be contributing to the problem, rather than making things better.
PS. What JMP said. Also.
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: [re=636494]ManchuCandidate[/re]: This is no place for such as serious discussion. That said “Israel very successfully bombed Iraq’s nuclear reactor back in the 80s and the plans for Iran seem similar.” suggests that the Ducksworthy Plan for World Peace TM is closer to being realized than I had hoped. All it needs is for the all the christerian, muslin, hindoo, jooish and the two buddhist fundamentalists to head to Jerusalem to await the (Talibani/Pakistani) bomb.
[re=636518]JMP[/re]: Seriously, it’s within the realm of imagination that maybe Iran doesn’t like being bombed, and wants to get nukes so that people stop bombing it, right? After all, quietly threatening to nuke Egypt worked wonders for Israel, in the aftermath of the Yom Kippor War. Why does Israel hate other countries that try to learn from its example?
Having gamed this scenario out several times, let me say that Israel will *NOT* be able to knock out all the facilities in one go, which is the requirement here. All pilots on the mission are expendable, because any of them who are captured will be hung in a very public ceremony. (The Iranian method utilizes a cord around the neck pulled up slowly by a tow truck.) The Iranian Revolutionary Guard will go berserk and start killing anyone they think might have helped Israel in any way and whatever “dump the mullahs” movement there is in Iran will disappear and not come back for twenty years or more. The saber rattling about attacking the alleged nuke sites better be for domestic politcal consumption and to shake the American money tree again or somebody needs to declare the Israeli government insane and commit them all to a hospital indefinitely.
It is a fact that possessing nuclear weapons keeps you safe from American military forces, which is why Iran and North Korea want them so badly. It’s also like landing on the Moon for places like India and Pakistan.
I declare! That Balfour really certainly opened a can of worms.
If God loves the Israelis so much, how come he gave them (or so the Israelis claim) such crappy real estate with no oil?
Having a few nukes has worked out really well for Pakistan, look what its done for them. They harbor and assist the Taliban and al queada, with whom we are ostensibly engaged in forever war, yet for 10 years, we have kept looking the other way and pretending that its everybody else in the room that farted. You can’t blame Iran for being jealous.
Did someone move Egypt and Iran?
[re=636543]mumblyjoe[/re]: Similarly, I don’t think a coincidence that India and Pakistan went to war many, many since they split but haven’t since they both developed nukes. The big worry with the nuclear weapons is if one of the nuclear powers gets an nutcase who would welcome an apocalypse as a leader; sadly, I think the country where that’s most likely right now is here, but don’t think Palin has that much of a chance in 2012.
Iran is going to be a nuclear power. There’s little that can be done about that short of all out war. That won’t be the end of the world. North Korea has a bomb and they’re several times more crazy than the Mullahs. This is simply a neocon circle jerk. Israel won’t bomb Iran unilaterally and Hopey isn’t exactly a profile in courage. He got pushed around by Andrew Brietbart for god’s sake, what chance is there he’ll unlease the monkeys from the castle in the middle east with all the strategic risks involved.
the sociopaths eternally running Israel’s government/military
Ken, please. Stop the hate speech. The sociopath lobby has gotten their name changed in the DSM to “borderline personality disorder.” This sounds better than “sociopath,” and WAY better than the old, discredited slur “psychopath.” Please use the correct terminology or we will kill you.
Obviously this is an example of “gotcha” journalism. Faux Noise is testing the American public (because everyone in America watches Faux Noise) to see if they notice that Iraq has become Egypt.
[re=636601]Aurelio[/re]: Uh, that should be “antisocial personality disorder.” I can’t always keep up with these tricky technical terms.
[re=636601]Aurelio[/re]: Did they get the name from the Madonna song? That would make sense, to me.
@mardam422: Well, you know how unstable the middle east is.
[re=636597]pdiddycornchips[/re]: Of course, Israel’s bet would be that Hopey’s enough of a pussy that they could force the issue and make him to come along for the ride, if they decided to start a new foreign adventure in Persia.
If you asked me before the election, that’d have been one thing. But ask me today if I were willing to take that bet? No thank you, sir.
The model for “preemptive strike” is just “premature ejaculation” and we all know how that turns out…
[re=636612]mumblyjoe[/re]:
That’s possible. Hopey would crawl up a fetal position under his desk in the oval office but Hilz would drag him out of there by his ear, kick him in the nutz and force him to tell the Israeli’s to keep their spurs from jinglin’ and janglin’.
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: you do know yer nutz, don’t you?…
“Israel releases plans to Atlantic Monthly” is basically just saying “Israel releases plans to Israel.”
[re=636633]Toomush Infermashun[/re]: Well isn’t that the polite way to counter my point of view?
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: Big, big difference between the ranting and raving for domestic consumption and the deed on the international stage.
Does the president of Iran scream and holler? Yes. Would he see his nation disappear overnight by launching an attack on anyone? Not very likely. This is the country that fought for ten years and over a million dead with Iraq’s army.
Now you want it to be the gravest threat to the world since asteroids?
[re=636649]stam487[/re]: It’s the only kind of counterargument you’ll actually respond to.
[re=636663]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]:
Heh
[re=636446]Prommie[/re]: So far the world has tolerated some bad behavior from Israel that it wouldn’t tolerate from anyone else, so I’d say they’ll somehow get a pass on this, too. If pointing out that it is not very nice to board supply ships from a NATO country and kill unarmed aid workers is anti-Semitic, then so be it (heard that Israel is ‘cooperating’ with a UN investigation after the UN agreed to their unspecified conditions. Not surprisingly, now Turkey refuses to cooperate). Bottom line is that friends don’t let friend act like douchebags. If we truly are a friend and an ally to Israel, it is incumbent upon us to say something like, ‘Hey, quit being such douchebags.’ But as you point out, any criticism–earned or not–is disregarded as merely a display of anti-semitism. Sigh…
[re=636447]MARCdMan[/re]: Yeah, the fact that that paragraph was just one long sentence was probably the most terrifying part of it. (Assuming the author was simply high on meth when he wrote it, of course.)
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: It’s a big risk even to talk about this shit. Israel should (a) not do it, and (b)STFU about doing it.
[re=636657]Geogre[/re]: Not to mention that Israel is surrounded by countries that Iran is at least somewhat allied too, and fallout isn’t just one of the greatest RPGs of all time.
[re=636699]Mickey7[/re]:
Here’s the problem, we have only two choices. Back Israel or don’t. Not supporting Israel is akin to supporting either the PLO or Hamas. Now, Israel isn’t perfect but they don’t kill their daughters for holding hands with a boy, they don’t strap a bomb vest to their kids and celebrate when they blow themslelves up, they don’t treat homosexuals and other minorities like dogs to be kicked, mistreated or killed with impunity. Keep this in mind because these are the people we’ll be handing victory to if/when Israel collapses. I know it’s considered gouche to say this shit but let’s face facts. The guy on the other side of the Israel/Arab divide aren’t exactly friendly to our western ideals of tolerance, peace and understanding. We back Israel because the alternative is not very pleasant.
[re=636718]pdiddycornchips[/re]: Yes, absolutely the A-rabs are sub-human monsters who don’t love their children. What’s your point?
[re=636718]pdiddycornchips[/re]: No, they just bomb the shit out of innocent civilians to kill one guy who might be near them, collectively punish the people who’ve they’ve forced into apartheid-style ghettos for the crimes a few, ensure children live in shacks, don’t allow all their people to vote. It’s hard to image why so many Palestinians resent the way they’re treated by their conquerors and oppressors. The current Israeli leadership is not exactly friendly to our western ideas of tolerance, peace and understanding. Oh and in Orthodox neighborhoods people beat up women who they think dress too slutty, or (gasp) have sex when they’re not married.
Oh and nice Bush-esque “with us or against us” job of acting as if there’s only two things America can do.
[re=636699]Mickey7[/re]: how anti-stupidism and anti-semitism got conflated is a post-modern mystery.
[re=636744]JMP[/re]: You forgot the part where they also sometimes raze entire villages of their own living-in-poverty citizens, because they can.
[re=636744]JMP[/re]: Um, actually…
[i](Bush would sometimes mock those aides and commentators who advocated an attack on Iran, even referring to the conservative columnists Charles Krauthammer and William Kristol as “the bomber boys,” according to two people I spoke with who overheard this.)[/i]
W. knew enough to stay out of this mess. Hopefully, your guy feels the same way.
[re=636744]JMP[/re]: so there are more than two choices? I’d love to know what our other options are. Palestinians could have lasting peace tomorrow backed up by an international troop presence. All they would have to do is agree to live in peace with their neighbors. It’s unfortunate but they have so far refused to consider that option. What they want is for Israel to simply disappear. I’m only saying that if Israel would in fact disappear, Arab barbarism would still exist. Again, I know it’s not polite to point out the fact that many parts of the Arab world hostile to the west but that’s a fact of life. You can pretend that appeasing them will work but I don’t think it will. We’ll probably never know because Isreal isn’t going anywhere, they aren’t going bomb Iran and the suffering of Palestinians caught in the middle of the larger battle between West and East will continue apace.
[re=636657]Geogre[/re]: Good points, but there is one exception to what you wrote. If the internal situation in Iran destabilized (in the eyes of the mullahs) and the mullahs anticipated trouble from the military — one of the largest, most experienced armies in the world, thanks to Saddam Hussein — then the mullahs would be sorely tempted to begin a conflict to engage most of the military’s attention. This has been a very popular strategy historically. I have no deep knowledge of Iran’s domestic political scene and thus no idea of how likely this scenario is, however, any more than I have a solid sense of how serious the Iranian’s president’s threats are. One thing is sure, though; a nuclear war would be an environmental disaster a million times worse than the BP spill, regardless of how it starts or how noble anybody’s cause is.
[re=636481]stam487[/re]: I could respond to your post in a number of ways, e.g., by pointing out the difference between Israeli’s bombing of the NOT-YET-FUELED Iraq reactor, and the bombing of a fully FUELED Iranian reactor.
But that would be responding based on facts, logic, and a knowledge of history. All are useless when debating the “Israel Issue” – regardless of the side one is taking (and particularly when trying to talk sense to one of God’s Chosen People).
Instead, I will merely re-state the “Neilist Plan for Peace In The Middle East.”
1. Move all the Palestinians to France.
2. Move all the Muslim holy places — e.g., The Dome of the Rock — to France, too.
A. Bechtel can handle the engineering (in the same manner as the ancient monuments were moved for the Aswan dam project), and the Saudis will be glad to pay for it give the result.
3. The Israelis (or “The Jews” or “The Juden”) can have all of the “Holy Land.” Who will care?: It’s a Desert Rathole.
4. Move all the French to the West Bank and Gaza.
The result: The next time there is a news report about how the IDF is murdering the poor French refugees in the West Bank and Gaza, the Entire World will have only one thought: “Gee, I hope they have enough bullets.”
Thank you! Thank you! Now, where do I pick up my Nobel Peace Prize? (Hopey got one, and he never came up with an idea half as good.)
Neilist
N.R.A. Life Member and Soon-To-Be Nobel Laureate
[re=636445]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: I first read “take a couple of Percosets” as “take a couple of Pentecosts”. Were you suggesting that the Knesset start speaking in tongues?
After looking at that map I think Israel’s flying boomsticks would be put to much better use bombing the Texas School Board, since its obvious the idiots who put together that map were referencing the neocon textbooks they keep putting out down there.
And can somebody please slap the guy that had the nerve to claim pdiddycornchips was a regular and a loyal Democrat? That guy is a raving lunatic neocon if ever there was one.
I’m not following this discussion. This is the second time someone wrote a “what-if” scenario piece on Israel bombing Iran (which will never happen) and Ken Layne is already blaming the Israelis as if they had done it.
Too much satire blurs the lines between reality and fantasy, I mean, you’d think from reading this site that America had elected a black president, and that some lunatic from Alaska has become a major political force, etc. I mean really.
[re=636934]eclecticbrotha[/re]: Bombing the Texas School Board… OR the Texas School Book Depository (which, if memory serves, will show the world that “Jews have guts”).
[re=636718]pdiddycornchips[/re]: We could just leave the whole region to its own devices for once. We don’t have to be Team America, World Police. The Cold War is over and we no longer have to pick a team for our game of global basketball.
Except, of course, that the region does have oil, so we’ll pick as our bestest friend the one country that a) has no oil and b) is not exactly popular with the places where we get our lovely black heroin. Sounds like a sensible and prudent foreign policy to me.
[re=636918]Neilist[/re]: Whats with the France obsession? Lotsa wingnuts hate France, too, but its normal for peasants to resent their superiors.
Oh, one more thing, even though it involves those pesky “fact” thingies:
The Atlantic article talks about “one hundred F-15Es, F-16Is, F-16C” heading from Israel toward the Iranian nuclear sites. If you know anything about those aircraft, that scenario is pretty much of a fantasy.
Given (1) the combat radius of the aircraft that Israel might use; (2) the distance to/from the Iranian nuclear sites; (3) the weapons load that would be required for many of the targets (e.g., 1000 lb. “bunker busters”); and (4) the IAF’s very, very limited air-to-air refueling capability, there are two options for any such strike:
1. A very limited round-trip strike, with some of the F-16Is and F-15Es flying “top cover,” rather than bombing, missions.
The problem is that this is not going to be sufficient, and will just stir up a hornet’s nest that will make any follow-up strikes that much harder.
2. A full-scale “one-way” raid, re the Doolittle Raid in 1942, with all of the aircraft committed either (A) crashing into the desert or the sea; or (B) landing in some neutral country (e.g., Saudi Arabia).
The problem with (A) is that it wipes out a substantial portion of the IAF, and its best aircraft, at at time when they would be most needed. (Also, you’d lose most/a lot of the pilots, which are harder to replace than the aircraft.)
The problem with (B) is that it is not politically viable — and Israel would have to trust the neutral to return the aircraft.
Bottom line: The Atlantic article is nothing more than what we Wonkies do in here on a daily basis: Impotent Mental Masturbation.
We now take you back to our regularly scheduled Buttsek discussions.
[re=636970]Neilist[/re]: Sometimes I sit on part of my psyche until it goes numb, and then I mentally masturbate.
Just to flip everyone out the Navy carrier jets should take off en masse and just bomb the shit out of Israel! And, just like when they attacked the U.S.S. Liberty in 1967, we can say “whoops, just a mistake”!
Also from Teh Atlantic:
This official noted that even Bush balked at attacking Iran’s nuclear facilities, and discouraged the Israelis from carrying out the attack on their own. (Bush would sometimes mock those aides and commentators who advocated an attack on Iran, even referring to the conservative columnists Charles Krauthammer and William Kristol as “the bomber boys,” according to two people I spoke with who overheard this.)
Nothing is more courageous than a pompous ass whose closest brush with danger is spilling a mixed drink on his pants.
It is good to remember how well the bombing of the Iraqi nuclear plant went. If I recall, it basically turned the Iraqi people against their vile dictator, whom they promptly overthrew, saving America the trouble having to disastrously invade the country in 2003. That’s how it went, right? I am so glad we are not there right now.
To Israel: Please do not bomb Iran. Nuke the Hell out of it. As you can see by the cowardly posts here, You Stand Alone. So, nuke this terrorist state back to the pre-stone age period and see who wants to threaten you after that. Your people were set to wander for thousands of years and now you have come home. Cherish and Protect It. If the world cannot take a stand with the righteous then “unleash the dogs of war” and come what may it will be better than having your people once again set to wander the world without a homeland. If this be the stance of the rest of the world, that you have to go it alone, then the Hell with them all. God be with you.
Comments on this entry are closed.