rumors on the internets

George Bush Back In Haiti, And This Time He’s Wearing Gloves!

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  • Matt Yglesias illustrates the ironic nature of our permanent occupation of Iraq with a special Alanis Morissette song! [Matt Yglesias]
  • Remember Dan Maes, the Colorado Tea Party man who exposed the U.N. conspiracy that would have forced the entire city of Denver to ride around on an enormous Tandem bicycle? Dan Maes’ comments were taken out of context, actually. But Dan Maes is still concerned that bicycles are unconstitutional, because let’s face it, they probably are. [Think Progress]
  • The State of California is moments away from imploding, mostly because it is “extremely difficult for normal people to live in” — normal people like Tim Cavanaugh, according to Tim Cavanaugh. [Hit & Run]
  • Republicans will win big in November through acceptable revolution: “violence at the polls.” Erick Erickson wants bloody race riots and other forms of violence at the polls, you heard it here first! [RedState]
  • George W. Bush is making another trip to Haiti, probably so he can shake hands with black people and then wipe himself with Bill Clinton’s shirt. [The Caucus]

About the author

Riley is an "internet blogger." He has written for such internet websites as True/Slant and the terrible Brangelina gossip emporium "The Huffington Post." Riley lives in northeast DC, near H Street. Maybe you do too and want to hang out?

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Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • jus_wonderin

    The bicycle guy is a whackadoodle. Grade A. Full carton. Train car full of whackadoodle.

  • chascates

    More comedy on the way! From NRO’s the Corner Tweet:

    Cont. RT @DrRandPaul: Rand Paul will be on the Sean Hannity radio show around 4:05 EDT.

  • Terry

    If Colorado elected Maes, they deserve all that he does to them or doesn’t do.

  • JMP

    The Libertarians do like to blame everything on high taxes, but it’s kind of strange that California’s budget woes are all the fault of high taxes, when for decades now they have basically been unable to raise taxes at all. But it really takes gall for a fucking libertarian magazine to accuse progressives of wanting policies that only benefit the super rich, when fucking the poor and middle class for the benefit of the super rich is the primary goal of their own dipshit philosophy.

  • slappypaddy

    somebody should tell george it’s way too late for the gloves. his fingerprints are all over the victim, the weapon, and the scene.

  • freakishlystrong

    If Gibby keeps dissing us “professional leftists”, he may force me to agree with Erik son of Erik, and for that I’m even more pissed at him.

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    The Redstaters are getting nastier everytime I read their comments. Half of them take the violence at the polls statement seriously.

  • Maus

    [re=635957]jus_wonderin[/re]: “The bicycle guy is a whackadoodle. Grade A. Full carton. Train car full of whackadoodle.”

    I’m sure he could still take out any “establishment/responsible” conservative.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Dubya’s going to Haiti? What the hell does that bastard have against that country? It’s just a good thing no Haitiens have attics, or they’d be drowning in them right now.

  • JMP

    [re=635973]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Well, at least it’s not as if a block of the modern red states have a history of actual brutal violence and murder at the polls to prevent people with the wrong skin color from voting.

    Here’s my favorite comment: “I picture an even bigger presence of Black Panthers at the doors of polling places, batons and all.”

    I also can’t believe the ridiculous slant of that Fox article Erick links to and his summary, turning the park service stopping kids from singing loudly and annoying everyone at the memorial into a claim that Obama has made them harass people for being patriots.

  • weejee

    Erick teh Red is relying Politco for hiz polling? Good luck on that Blovember threeth after all the Cocktober surprises.

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    I assumed they were just really bad singers. You now the type,first round American Idol reject bad.

  • Prommie

    Is it ironic that Alanis’ list of “ironies” aren’t ironic? Is that the point? And how bout them transparent dangling carrots?

  • JMP

    [re=636000]JMP[/re]: D’oh, forgot my comment on the comment; I was going to say, so I suppose this commenter pictures four guys standing around.

  • Extemporanus

    ♪♫“It’s like drohhh-OH-ones on your wedding day…”♪♫

  • comicbookguy

    [re=636005]weejee[/re]: I just read the comments on redstate and apparently the already won the 2010 elections. They just need to show up at the polls this November to enforce their decision. With the 2nd amendment.

  • Toomush Infermashun

    Loved the Bill/Dubya punch and judy show…all the sneaky little prep school smarminess is right there…”can’t have that Haitian handsweat…where’s my wipes…Oh, Bill’s shirt is misunderestimating me…” Can this thing escalate???? Pleeze!!!!…

  • gradgrind

    “One of the cool things about California is that it’s still a place where you see cars on cinderblocks and chicken coops in yards.”

    If you think that’s cool, Mr. Cavanaugh, then truly New Mexico is YOUR Land of Enchantment!

  • GOPCrusher

    [re=635973]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: They have themselves fully convinced of the “rightness” of their cause. And that makes them dangerous. I still predict that shortly after the November elections, when things don’t go as planned, a full blown act or several acts of domestic terrorism. In fact, I would not put it past one of the more extreme elements to try something before the election, in the hopes of showing the American public that they are serious about taking America back, and what will happen if they don’t get their way.

  • Beowoof

    Wow I tried to read some Red State comments, but I couldn’t take that much stupid.

  • imissopus

    [re=636000]JMP[/re]: I picture an even bigger presence of Black Panthers at the doors of polling places, batons and all.

    And then when the NBP don’t show up at any polling places outside of a minority neighborhood or two in Philadelphia, these nuts will claim that the Panthers were scared off by the knowledge they might be met by a bunch of tri-cornered-hatted patriots who are taking their country back, and so on.

    And yeah, that Reason article gets most everything wrong, including the whole state-taxes-have-skyrocketed argument, but it is possible that certain local taxes have gone up enough in various municipalities to make the tax burden higher for residents. Here in LA we’ve got a sales tax near 10% (it was 8 1/4 ten years ago) and utility taxes keep getting raised. Not that it matters, since the city’s budget is still a wreck.

    Of course the majority of the budget woes have their roots in Prop 13, which has actually made it much easier for members of the middle class to live here because they pay so little in property taxes, but of course public schools and services have gone to hell because of the lack of revenue. How you can write an article about California circling the drain financially and not mention Prop 13 at all is beyond me. This dude is obviously not serious about this conversation.

  • lochnessmonster

    We’ll be heading out California way at the end of the month. If it is emploding, where will our plane land OR will we have the whole state to ourselves?

  • whiterabid

    Maes could win in Colorado. Most counties are voting by mail, and Maes’ comments came after McInnis admitted to plagiarism and after many of the ballots were sent to the clerk’s office. But he can’t get elected. Even the Republicans on the Denver Post blog sounded like they were commenting on Wonkette. But if he does win the nomination, he could be the Red State poster boy.

  • ronaldwalt

    What the hell is he doing there..? He must be there for picnic!! Isn’t he..?
    Superstar Smile

  • steverino247

    [re=636141]lochnessmonster[/re]: We’re not going anywhere, certainly not anywhere near Libertarianism. I don’t know why the Republican Party doesn’t just merge with them since that’s where they’ve been stealing ideas from for so long. Maybe the drug legalization holds them back, I’m not sure.

    The Republicans wanted the massive prison system to keep them safe, but didn’t know it would be run by members of a correctional officers association who would want pensions, etc.? Please. They wanted it all but didn’t want to have to pay for it and used Prop. 13 as their Holy Shield.

    I also dispute this “massive hiring” bullshit because there’s been hiring freezes for years and mandatory unpaid time off going into the second year now. We’re laying off teachers and social workers, so if you want to beat or molest your bastard stepchild, now’s your time.