“Meanwhile back at the farm, or on the border, lone ranger Gov. Brewer commendably and courageously continues to lead a battalion of border-protection officials, on the one hand fighting the feds with state politicians and attorneys, and on the other hand fighting illegals with border agents, sheriffs and other law enforcement. What a job, huh? Does anyone think she endures those hardships merely for a paycheck? Hardly. Rather, that’s pure, unadulterated patriotism.” Click here to read the rest of this dumb Chuck Norris editorial. Click here to be disappointed that Antonin Scalia wasn’t hurt after he tripped and fell on the pavement in Rhode Island yesterday. Click here to see Justin Bieber get hit in the head by a flying water bottle. [WND/Daily Intel/YouTube]
WHOOPS WRONG CHOICE YOU DIED 4:49 pm August 9, 2010
CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE: Chuck Norris Says Jan Brewer Is ‘Tougher’ Than Him
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{ 48 comments }
Is there a site I can click to see Scalia trip over Chuck Norris and land on Justin Bieber, killing all three instantly?
Eventually we’ll be able to celebrate the headline, “Justice Scalia Broken: And All the King’s Horses and ….”
Did we get a little ahead of ourself, Jack?
[re=635123]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Ken posted at the same time. He must be eliminated.
I will read a Chuck Norris editorial about Jan Brewer as long as it’s truthfully titled. Something like “Repetitive Traumatic Encephalopathy Patient Crushes on Human Cakewreck.”
Jack, you should post a warning on the Justin Bieber link about that adenoidal teenage whine. Ears… bleeding…
Damn that was a big ass water bottle. Kudos to whoever threw it, to be able to crack him on the head must’ve taken some skill.
“Does anyone think she endures those hardships merely for a paycheck?”
No, I think she endures these alleged hardships (which really mostly consists of wasting Arizona’s money) merely for political pandering to the racist wingnut base.
Justice Scalia then hosted a press conference where he asked why Judge Walker can’t shut up about the virulent anti-gay death threats he keeps receiving, since risking your life is obviously part of the job.
It was satisfying to see Bieber take a bottle to the head. Is that wrong?
It’s on account of the cajones, which Chuck lost in some far-ago action film, during filming…when he zagged and shoulda zigged…
That would make an awesome video game…being able to throw bottles of water, and other things at those three. But would it be for the wii or Play Station?
Click here to make me giggle
i am not surprised that chuck norris would say that about jan brewer . didn’t she liberate europe after the nazis killed her father and cut his head off and gave it to the messicans who played soccer in the desert with it ? but what does that make him ?
[re=635189]rmjag[/re]: It makes him a has-been action star with a semi-coherent political blog…
Jan Brewer flosses her teeth with barbed wire from the border.
Jan Brewer eats scorpions for breakfast and burps up rattlesnakes.
Jan Brewer taught Chuck Norris how to do a roundhouse kick.
He left out my favorite one, “Jan Brewer has a bigger penis than Chuck Norris.”
That Chuck Norris .gif just keeps on giving.
Hollywood is so damned liberal, innit?
Okay, Justice Scalia fell down on his way out of Venda Ravioli on Federal Hill in Providence. That place is commonly known in Little Rhody as a flat-out mob affiliated establishment. Rule of law? Fuggedabaddit!
I read the column twice. Wow. Chuck Norris truly is dumb as a fence post. Too many shots to the head, Chuck? Take your meds and sit down before you hurt yourself.
The only person with the cajones to lob that big ass bottle at Bieber is Jan Brewer.
chuckle-head has watched too many second-rate movies and now his mind is permanently imprisoned in an overheated cell of delusion.
free chuck norris!
I heard Jan Brewer took an entire bottle of sleeping pills and didn’t even blink.
Chuck Norris has caught the crazy…Has he been swapping spit with Ted Nugent?
Of course Jan Brewer is tough…she’s the governor of the kidnappin’, beheadin’, buryin’-in-the-desert capitol of the world
Jan Brewer’s Kung Fu better than Chuck Norris’ Kung Fu.
Oh wait. Chuck dispatched all the illegals and terrorists in his films with Karate.
[re=635249]Cant Buy a Thrill[/re]: What’s funny is that when anyone points out that the beheadings never actually happened, the response has been along the lines of “uh huh, did so!”
Speaking of tough bastards who can’t be killed, didja know Dick Cheney is out of the hospital again?
What’s this now, five heart attacks? Is he up to five now?? Maybe, in honor of his Dark Lord and master, number six (satan’s own number) will finally be the one to do him in. It’s only a matter of time…
I think Chuck uses another name and posts comments on Politico.
[re=635195]Bearbloke[/re]: semi-coherent ? no . I am semi-coherent ( by choice ) . he is incoherent ( not by choice ) .
[re=635217]madirishman[/re]: why do you want him to not hurt himself ?
[re=635260]HedonismBot[/re]: The only way the Cyborg known as Dick Cheny has a 6th heart attack is if he forgets to plug himself into a wall socket before going into stand-by mode. Other than that, he’s still under warranty.
On the subject of Associate Justice Scalia, however, I thought weebles only wobbled?
[re=635215]Fudgie the Whale[/re]: I thought the flat-out mob establishment was Providence City Hall, aka “Buddy’s Place.”
[re=635182]BklynIlluminati[/re]: Whoops, wrong choice, I died.
Palin-Norris 2012!
She’s a sassy sista from Wassilla. He’s a hot hombre from Houston. He’s got the fists, she’s got the cojones. Together they’re putting the “Pee” in the GOP, the “tit” in the Constitution, the “pain” in Campaign. Start the countdown to victory.
[re=635282]rmjag[/re]: Well, considering Chuck’s advanced age, it just seems mean to want him to hurt himself. But if YOU want to hurt him…go right ahead.
[re=635302]just pixels[/re]: Oh, good God, don’t even SUGGEST that! The wingnuts will be all over that! Palin-Norris in 2012 would cause the universe to convulse with horror! The space-time continuum would shatter into a bazillion pieces!
[re=635313]madirishman[/re]: i don’t believe i need to do that . he has a role in a new action-adventure . he plays the part of jan brewer’s adult diapers . it’s called ‘the hurt locker’
[re=635302]just pixels[/re]: that was really very good ! delightful ….
At his age my three year old grandson could kick his ass and take his ensure.
Reading Chuck’s message of good will towards men and Merry Christmas made me want to do situps on a tilted ironing board with encouragement from Christy Brinkley. Are we sure he hasn’t confused Jan Brewer and the Milwaukee Brewers? They are, in the Babe’s immortal words, having a better year than she is (third place, under .500, but still…). Only the Chuckster would resurrect a pre-Civil War quote on state’s rights to justify his position, if in fact he has one beyond “screw the Mexicans.” Watching the death throes of the conservative backlash has made me fear for the survival of reason — but hearing Caribou Barbie and the Lipton Legion question Obama’s manhood did not surprise a bit. The GOP has been a minority party for most of the last century, and only the most scurrilous ad hominem attacks have kept it going. The two slimiest smear artists were Nixon and Reagan, hence the most successful, though Joe McCarthy may have been in a sewer of his own when it came to completely arbitrary personal vilification. I guess a viable agenda or rational discourse are too much to ask of them after all these years.
These kids today are base ANIMALS! Throwing a water bottle!? Full of water?? At a young man’s tender head??
What, they didn’t “have time” to piss in the bottle first?
Why, in my day we threw whisky bottles, bats, lchickens, boots, and Kennedy half-dollars!
G.G. Allin is weeping in hell right now.
Dimebag forever!
Yeah, she fights illegals alongside her border agents.
Oh, those are FEDERAL border agents?
Talking point FAIL
You will need my cold, dead hands to click on “to read the rest of this dumb Chuck Norris editorial”.
[re=635328]lawrenceofthedesert[/re]:
“The two slimiest smear artists were Nixon and Reagan…”
What about Lee Atwater and Karl Rove? The architects of, respectedly, the Southern Strategy and the Swift Boaters. Those two did so much damage because they were content to work from the sidelines. No doubt they realized early on that they were far too slimy to ever win the trust of the voters. As Dick Cheney showed us, real power comes from the freedom of not having to run for actual election on one’s own merits.
Please play this song while watching that animated gif: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7yQwQtSN7M
OMG!
Could you imagine if Scalia was hurt (and hurt bad) so he had to retire and Obama got to nominate another justice.
Justice!
Lord, wouldn’t we LMAO.
Please god.
Chuck Norris on the World Nut Daily….apparently his gig selling exercise equipment on late night teevee is not enough to keep him busy… Hey, he and Ted Nugent should team up and be the official spokesmodels for the nutter arm of the republican party, imagine the rallies! Sarah could drop out of a helicopter and parachute onstage to perform her snowbilly grifting, the baggers would be swooning in the aisles.. with a mooseburger BBQ to follow :..
[re=635462]Nueronanonymous[/re]: how about sarah could ‘drop thru’ stage from helicopter – no parachute ?
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