The Basil Marceaux Has Become SELF-AWARE, Is No Longer That Fun

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NO.Since we introduced you to your 2010 election boyfriend, Basil Marceaux, the man and his opposition to traffic-stop slavery have achieved virulence here on the Internets. Basil’s infamous local news broadcast introduction to voters has shown up and been laughed about on teevee shows as well. But the problem is that, despite his seeming avoidance of sanity and spelling and grammar norms, Basil is aware that he is now Internet-famous and is now looking to capitalize on it. Basil needs to put on a brave face and go back to being 100% crazy, because right now he may be JUMPING THE SHARK.

See, we can laugh at him and his badge, but he consciously calls himself “Basil Marceaux Dot Com” now. Is there too much fake here to enjoy the real craziness? It is an open, evolving discussion.

Yes, this is like an actual YouTube account. And he has a real logo. And look: an official Zazzle store. Just like any other YouTube star! STOP GOING MAINSTREAM ON US, BASIL.

Mediate decided to do some “Jack Stuef Journalism” and called up Basil, and look how he opened the interview: “You’re not gonna make an ass of me, now, are you?” C’mon, Basil, at least pretend to not understand what is going on.

Basil Marceaux is IN HOLLYWOOD right now, as he will appear on tonight’s Jimmy Kimmel Live. Please, for the love of God, nobody teach him phonics while he is hanging out with all the other celebrities out there. We still have hope for you, Basil. [Mediate]

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About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

View all articles by Jack Stuef

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27 comments

  1. Alcoholic

    [re=630640]Fred Wertham Jr.[/re]: Quickly, someone make a Basil Marceaux is on the prowl rap! THERE’S STILL SOME WATER IN THIS ROCK.

  2. Extemporanus

    [re=630639]Bearbloke[/re]: [re=630646]Extemporanus[/re]: I believe that footage was shot right after he splashed down.

  3. JMP

    Don’t worry about Basil going Hollywood; he’s appearing on Jimmy Kimmel, so he won’t be meeting any actual celebrities, or watched by any viewers.

  4. SayItWithWookies

    It’s inevitable. You can even tell them how it’ll play out but they do it anyway. You will bump around inside the lampshade for a good ten minutes, then the heat from the lightbulb will kill you, and then we’ll find someone else to entertain us, is what you tell them. And they’re all still like, “turn on the light! Turn on the light!” Okay…

  5. RoscoePColtraine

    Basil is taking a page from the William Hung playbook. (Despite the name, that link IS sfw.) The world is laughing at you because you made a fool of yourself? Go with it!

  6. iburl

    My family started sending stuff to each other about it today, so yes, Basil is now firmly ensconced in suburban america’s celebrity culture. Can a VH-1 dating show be far behind? “traffic stop repression, boyee!” “I want a sex with a no teeths woman!”

  7. emberglance

    No, you are being too sentimental Wonkette – this is far funnier than the website. The website was but a foretaste, John the Baptist to this video coming. Everyone says the GOP has no ideas – this man has almost literally nothing but ideas: they seem come to him all the time.

    “I picked this location cos… I like it a lot”. nuff sed.

  8. Butterscotch Stalin

    Uh huh, only when a white “unconventional” candidate shows up do the cash registers start ringing. “Post-racial,” my ass.

  9. weejee

    Jack! He is not our election boyfriend, or even our internet boyfriend. He is our Everclear boyfriend. Please try to keep this straight.

  10. edgydrifter

    I count eight bars on that sleeve. I think that makes him Field Marshal of Crackpottery, Engineering Corps.

  11. Jukesgrrl

    [re=630659]JMP[/re]: Wow, that’s as fact-free as post as one might read on Breitbart’s BigHollywood. Kimmel has as many A-list guests as any other talk show, and unlike Jay and Dave, he’s friends with a lot of them. He also has the market on sports stars totally cornered. One reason is, his show isn’t as white-centric as most of the others.

  12. Enslave the Whales

    So I actually started this clip, because I wanted to see if I could figure out what the hashmarks were on his sleeves. Now, I’ve seen long-term vets with lots of hashmarks — is it one mark per two years? Or per four? — but I’m unclear on which service has a black jacket with red/yellow hashmarks.

    Anyhow, no illumination on that point, since it was just an audio clip. However, despite not personally being Alvin Green, I did have a moment of enlightenment listening to it. When Mr. Basil first appeared on the scene, I registered an opinion that he was, perhaps, too-low-hanging cojones (Alaskan for fruit). Having been enlightened, I now withdraw my objection. Basil is incoherent, non-rational, and fact-challenged; but only in the same sense as is your average teabagger. I no longer think he is mentally deficient, just stupid and willfully ignorant.

    If he weren’t such a doofus, some Democrat could get a lot of mileage out of he extended rant about the financial beating he took do to his teeth, followed by the interviewer asking if that meant he was in favor of universal coverage, followed by Basil (after a pause to regroup) allowing that Obama coverage had cooties.

    If there is such a thing as the anti-Dao, Basil is its conduit.

  13. DC Hates Me

    Jack Stuef is just jealous coz he’s not as famous as Basil Marceaux. Same thing happened with Dr Frankenstein and his pet monster.

  14. Cliff Poncier

    Basil Marceaux.com was in the same Marine outfit as Frank Castle, AKA The Punisher. Basil Marceaux.com will kill you seven different ways before you hit the ground.

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