Liveblogging Barack Obama On This Ladies' Chat Show, 'The View'
OMG the president is on the famous old-lady chatroom teevee show The View. And if you're on the East Coast, he is on the teevee right now at this moment, if you're reading this exactly when we are typing it. Let's join all the famous ladies -- Oprah, Katie Couric, Penelope Cruz, Donna Brazile and Meg McCain -- for a delightful daytime talk romp with our Commander in Couch, Barack Obama! He will tell America's house-bound moms and disabled factory workers about the Highs & Lows of his eight years in the White House, so far.
11: 14 AM -- This is what it takes to get some emergency liveblogging going on, these days:
Riley W.
I will celebrate with some new hampshire mexican food
Ken L.
riley are you on the EAST COAST
Ken L.
if so can you emergency liveblog THE VIEW?
Riley W.
yes I am
Ken L.
because fucking jack's idea of morning is still lunchtime
Lauri A.
He's already like Jim Newell
Riley W.
when is this television program starting?
Ken L.
it is on right now i think!
Ken L.
it started at 11am
although they are hopefully saving 'bams for later
Riley W.
hold on I am trying to figure out what "channel" the view is on
Ken L.
abc i think
Ken L.
?
Riley W.
oh shit he is on right now
Ken L.
type type!
Riley W.
he just used the word "reptile"!
Ken L.
i can make a post an intro for you
Jul 29
11: 20 AM
Riley W.
okay that would be good
Riley W.
who are all of these women?
Riley W.
good lord
Riley W.
ok commercial break
11: 21 - Barack Obama admits he is "reptilian."
11: 21 - QUESTION: Some people call you, Barack Obama, a black president. That is name-calling, right?
11: 21 - Barack Obama: I wrote a book about this. Read it.
11: 27 - Look at all the gray hairs our president now has!
11: 28 - Stimulus bill failed. FAILED. We are in a chronic state of joblessness, says the white woman, "Elizabeth," if that is her real name?
11: 34 - It's time to get out of Afghanistan, Mr. President. Also, Wikileaks?
11: 34 - Obama: Yeah, we got leaks, leaks from Wikileaks. We are very leaky right now. But I know this. Afghanistan is leaky right now.
11: 36 - Obama warns The View about CHAOS-STAN, which is a country that will be created if we "lose the war."
11: 39 - Commercial break. Here is what has been said, so far, basically: Us Americans are all bicurious, half-white reptiles, which is why we need to work together to defeat Wikileaks. Barack Obama saved your job, and that is why he has so many gray hairs.
11: 42 - Okay we're back with President Obama. You thought those questions were hard? We are going to do a "lightning rod" rapid-fire question session. Ugh.
11: 43 - Jesus. The question is "Mel Gibson, Snooki?" And Obama then admits he "knows Linsday Lohan is in jail."
11: 44 - Barack Obama DOES NOT have Justin Beiber (sp?) on his iPod. That was another question, asked by the ladies.
11: 45 - Barack Obama has prepared a short PowerPoint about his enterprising young daughters.
11: 46 - "We are the most normal women you will ever meet, Mr. President." False.
11: 47 - Commercial Break recap: The "lightning rod" question round was actually just a friendly "So, do you use Twitter and iPods?" query.
11: 49 - How much longer, Ken?
11: 50 - And now we will Wikipedia "The View" and find out who these women actually are.
11: 51 - Crap! We're back! Too late.
11: 51 - Whoopi asks Barack Obama if he can "walk on water." Then another lady asks if he is on Zoloft. That is the obvious follow-up question.
11: 51 - Here comes the health-care talk.
11: 52 - Obama: All of your dumb kids are going to college, and then they will make jobs.
11: 53 - Washington is obsessed with polls! "I can look at my polls and say, 'My polls are bigger than your polls.'"
11: 54 - Another predictable laundry list of "Things that suck in this country." Yawn.
11: 56 - Okay it is OVER, and not a moment too soon.
11: 57 - What just happened? Why did Barack Obama voluntarily surround himself with so many unpleasant old ladies? Why doesn't Barack Obama listen to Taylor Swift, on his iPod? And why did he call everyone a mongrel? He said that: "We are all mongrels." Says you, Obama.
Until next time, which hopefully will be never!