Sure, White House, Just Ignore JACK WHITE and Focus On the ‘Jonas Bros.’

  they are know for ejaculating foam on young girls


Remember when the Beatles played for Barack Obama during the Cuban Missile Crisis last month? The White House has finally released the sordid video from this night of Monarchist anti-Americanism, in which “Sir” Paul McCartney said something rude about George Bush Junior, which is just another example of this so-called White House’s rampant racism.

Who are these Jonas Brothers, anyway? A child act for ‘tween sexting, we understand, but they are certainly no Justin Beiber! This is what ‘tween girls are masturbating to, in America, today, according to the Blingees. Why can’t Barack Obama and his socialist propagandists at least figure out which ‘tween act is dampening panties in Summer Jam 2010?

More importantly, even if you have no idea who the White Stripes are/were, if you were operating the camera on this day and came across the weird figure of Jack White, wouldn’t you maybe linger on him for a moment and perhaps ask, “What is even up with you, Detroit Vampire Cowboy?”

“Drive My Car” is a dumb song, too. [White House]

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A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

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40 comments

  1. fictional character

    i haven’t quite been able to figure out why literally any music that jack white makes is somehow automatically good, but it is.

  2. JMP

    Uh, who are the White Stripes then? I’ve never heard of them before your last paragraph implying there’s something wrong about having no idea who they & some guy named Jack White are.

  3. Manos: Hands of Fate

    I think we will have to wait until we get a white Republican in the White house before Ludacris will get his long deserved invitation to play the White House.

  4. chascates

    A least one hundred million Americans have said rude things about George Bush and it was ignored. You have to be from a foreign country to get attention from the lamestream media.

  5. carlgt1

    it was hilarious to watch the teabagger outrage for a month after Paul’s mild Bush slam. If these nuts can get as furious over the “nice Beatle” as terrorist Muslins get irate over Denmark & Switzerland, you have to wonder if they really aren’t all “brothers in arms” after all!

  6. mumblyjoe

    [re=627208]chascates[/re]: I actually assume it’s a “being a popular musician, rather than an actor, director, or comedian” thing, seeing as, Dixie Chicks.

  7. JMP

    [re=627208]chascates[/re]: Oh, a number of famous Americans got media attention for saying rude things about Bush – with the mainstream media calling them America-hating traitors for doing so. You may recall one girl band from Texas who ended up having the nation’s largest radio chain sponsoring record-burning parties.

  8. Oblios Cap

    If only NWA were allowed to play the White house. Think of all the strokes that would be responsible for!

  9. Oblios Cap

    [re=627214]JMP[/re]:

    Would that be the same chain that boycotted playing any Springsteen songs because of his anti-war stance?

  10. magic titty

    Drive My Car is in fact so dumb, it’s one of the better Beatles tunes. Anyway, what is up with Jack White lately? Dead Weather and marriage and shit like that?

  11. Mild Midwesterner

    [re=627205]JMP[/re]: The White Stripes were a pseudo-militant white supremicist group active in the Detroit area. They were provided a much needed antidote to the highly enjoyable music distributed by Motown Records.

  12. weejee

    Lava lamps, lava lamps??? What is the subliminal with that, eh? ‘Murica lava or leave it? Whole lava shakin’ goin’ on?

  13. Autochthon

    Libertine men and scarlet women and RAGTIME! SHAMELESS music that’ll grab your son, your daughter into the arms of a jungle animal instinct – MASSTERIA!

  14. JMP

    [re=627217]Oblios Cap[/re]: Yes indeed; and anyone else who publicly were right about invading Iraq. But remember, the media has a liberal bias!

  15. bozofish

    Nothing beats Bruno Ganz sitting in a VW Bug whisper-singing “Baby, you can drive my car…beep-beep und beep-beep, ja.”

  16. Gorillionaire

    The deal with McCartney is that the year after the 9/11/01 event (Republican Christmas) he went on tour in the US doing a song he wrote called “Freedom” (absolutely the laziest song he ever wrote) and the wingnuts all purred with glee and thought that they had an actual bonafide rock star on their side. Of course McCartney may be many things, a pothead, a ripping bass player, a decent drummer, what have you, but was never any kind of wingnut. Then when he started criticizing the UK’s involvement in the Iraq war and then the funny comment about Dubya, the wingnuts looked at each other and decided at once to have four week long heart attacks over it.

  17. Mr Blifil

    How can Sir Paul McCartney allow his knightliness to be sullied by appearing alongside that GUTTER TRASH? I also heard that Sir Paul decided to do Dave Grohl a solid and sang “Rape Me” addressing the entire song to Rahm Emmanuel.

  18. Surfeit O'Hubris

    I would have thought that on the dumb-and-proud right, not knowing what a lieberry is would be considered a badge of honor.

  19. Kool Keith

    It’s all about the page views when you are a White House blogger, and the Jonas Bros bring the page view$. We’re gonna solve this deficit thing by selling ads for teeth-whitener and self-published novels.

  20. Prommie

    [re=627261]FlownOver[/re]: Jack White certainly is bloating up for sure, thats the sign of the booze, usually.

  21. lawrenceofthedesert

    Jack does not look comfortably in his element, shall we say, which I find commendable in the lad. The YouTube video really did not want to run right; has Clear Channel bought them out?

  22. JMP

    [re=627271]Prommie[/re]: Are you suggesting a musician might drink too much alcohol? That’s unpossible!

  23. Looy

    They ignored Elvis Costello too, at around 2:50. Guess they didn’t want to be around to witness his artistic decline.

  24. simonlcupcake

    [re=627209]carlgt1[/re]: The best part of the wingnut outrage: the people who said “Well, we’d expect this from Lennon.” Like it’s 1964 and/or Lennon hasn’t been dead for 30 years.

  25. GOPCrusher

    I still snicker when they replay the Raygun speech about how wonderful things were in America as proved by Bruce Springsteen’s song “Born In The USA”.
    That was when I knew he had Alzheimer’s.

  26. sezme

    Cowboy Jack White just snuck in though the coachmen’s entrance with Michaele and Tareq Salahi. Also, his video is blocked in Canadar so couldn’t watch, though I did somehow manage to sit through the Jonas Brothers’ Drive My Car which was stunningly awful. Did Jack White sing “Monkberry Moon Delight?” That would have been good.

  27. Extemporanus

    Jack White’s sister-wife Meg’s sex tape is pretty hot — they totatlly should’ve played that instead of Los JoBro’s New Pube Review.

    Hey, them Obama girls gotta grow-up sometime, right?

  28. carlgt1

    [re=627365]simonlcupcake[/re]: haha I missed that reply. You’d think the Repugs would start to wonder if the chirpy, winkin’ & dare I say “Sarah Palin” of the Beatles even makes a Bush joke and is happy Obama is prez. They just can’t see that Paul represents pretty much the world i.e with us on 9/11, sick of us a year later….

  29. Veritas78

    So that was a trick question of which Jonas brother is gay, right? Okay, then: which one “married Elaine Chou?” as the kids say today.

Comments are closed.