AT LEAST IT'S NOT SPANISH!  2:15 pm July 26, 2010

Bill Kristol Uses Non-Word To Define Conservative Agenda

by Riley Waggaman

bill kristol talks about wordsHi America, do you have a second? Because Bill Kristol needs your help most urgently. He is searching for a word that defines the “conservative agenda,” a word that means “to refute making sense” and “to repudiate Mexicans,” a special word meaning both of these things at the same time. “Get a brain, morans” doesn’t quite work, because it is a complete sentence and not a word. Hm. Oh wait what about Sarah Palin’s Shakespearean Couplet, “refudiation”? Yes, that just might be stupid enough!

We need a word that captures and conjoins the meanings of refutation and repudiation. And we need it now. To save the country from the ravages of contemporary liberalism, we have to refute liberal arguments and see liberal politicians repudiated at the polls.

So the conservative agenda is, in a word, refudiation.

Very good, but isn’t conservatism all about preserving the original and obvious intent of all words and collection of words, such as the Articles of Confederation and the other Adobe PDFs Thomas Jefferson once wrote? Why would conservatives want to reinterpret “refutation” and “repudiation”? By definition conservatives are conservative about both of these words.

Billy Kristol explains:

We are conservatives. We ordinarily shun novelties of all kinds, including new words. But desperate times call for desperate measures. The Obama project is one of noxious ideology and wild political overreach. The challenge before conservatives is to beat back both. So say it loud and say it proud: Refudiate liberalism now!

These are desperate times indeed, and that is why you should shoot yourself right now before Barack Obama takes all the guns and ammo.

Or you can stick around and enjoy as bloated diabetics scream, “Refudiate liberalism now!” into your eardrums, each and every day, for the rest of your sad, sad life. [The Weekly Standard]

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V572625694 July 26, 2010 at 2:20 pm

Must not click the link. Must not click the link. Kristol cannot be so craven in his hardon for Snowbilly as to back into this idiotic argument.

IceCreamEmpress July 26, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

That is fucking hilarious. So much for the intellectual rigor of conservative thought! IRVING KRISTOL MUST BE ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE.

Gratuitous World July 26, 2010 at 2:22 pm

“We ordinarily shun novelties of all kinds, including new words.”

Except, of course, for hilarities such as the word “bling” and Astroglide(TM?)

please continue.

Les Paultard July 26, 2010 at 2:25 pm

Freakin’ RINO.

Texan Bulldoggette July 26, 2010 at 2:25 pm

[re=625696]V572625694[/re]: Really, Human Dildo should just let her stick her stiletto in his asshole, since he apparently hasn’t made enough of a fool of himself by saying anything (however remotely) stupid to make this harpy not seem dumber than a bag of hammers.

JMP July 26, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Shorter Kristol: Having unleashed Sarah the Stupid on the non-Alaska parts of the country, I must struggle to defend and redefine her dumbest and most insipid comments as if they actually mean something. And maybe if I defend he enough she’ll let me get to second base with her.

torera July 26, 2010 at 2:29 pm

There is nothing more pathetic than a dweeb like Kristol thinking Palin will do anything more than step her stillettos thru his panting tongue. Still, maybe that’s enough.

norbizness July 26, 2010 at 2:30 pm

Didn’t James Brown have that one song, “(Say It Loud) I’m Hopelessly Idiotic and Completely Wrong in All My Predictions and I’m Proud”?

Hoplight July 26, 2010 at 2:30 pm

The ravages of contemporarily liberalism? Like trying to reinstall even a modicum of banking regulation to prevent the banks and wall street from repeatedly holding the country hostage unless they get additional 2 trillion dollar bailouts? Yeah, “ravages.” Sure. I see he has no fucking clue what ANY words mean.

RoscoePColtraine July 26, 2010 at 2:33 pm

Now we know what happens when refute and repudiate get drunk at a bar and go home together. REFUDIATE is their ungodly spawn. And Sarah Palin is the universe wherein the aforementioned scenario takes place.

Scaggsville guy July 26, 2010 at 2:35 pm

As usual, he has everything wrong. He says the Snowbilly wrote refudiate as a Tweet, and makes it sound like it was just a typo. But in fact, she clearly pronounced it refudiate during a TV appearance.

The difference is important because a typo is just a typo, but pronouncing the word with an F means that she never saw the word repudiate in print, or else she would remember it correctly. Which means she never reads anything, which of course we already knew when she couldn’t name a single newspaper.

And yet Kristol goes on to blither about “intellectual refutation versus political repudiation” as if this were not a case of a ditzy ex-beauty queen who’s just plain stupid and doesn’t know simple words.

WarAndGee July 26, 2010 at 2:35 pm

HYPOCRAZIATE: for the people on social Security who hate socialism and refuse to payback their employers portion

FRAUDBOGGLE: right wing, founding fathery, psuedo patriotic, family values ethereal bullshit that has no basis in any specific modern political policy.

DEREALITIZE: That freemarket health care costs are not rising that bad and the benevolence of corporate America will magically take care of the all such problems. The idea that all government is the problem (except public parkland and white suburban schools) but quietly accept that all the trillions spent on defense is necessary and it’s the damn Messicans that are using up all hard earned tax dollars and they should all go home.

Get it in your next column Fraudboggler.

mookworthjwilson July 26, 2010 at 2:35 pm

Hmmm…I’m trying to think of a new word that really gets the essence of Bill Kristol…I KNOW!…childrapist! But not the old way,there’s no space between the new word!

Dashboard_Buddha July 26, 2010 at 2:36 pm

Good lord…if Sarah had a cock, Billiam would be sucking it right now. Or maybe she makes him suck of Todd’s dick because she can’t be bothered.

JMP July 26, 2010 at 2:37 pm

[re=625713]Hoplight[/re]: To Kristol, the “ravages” of contemporary liberalism are not nuking Iran, and just not having killed enough brown people in general. That’s all he really cares about; the guy doesn’t give or know a shit about domestic policy, and gives mere lip service to it.

V572625694 July 26, 2010 at 2:38 pm

[re=625704]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I object to your characterization of hammers, which are useful implements whatever their intellectual disabilities. Or to put it another way: to say Sarah Palin is dumber than a bag of hammers is an insult to hammers, from tack- through claw, ball-pien to sledge-.

Prommie July 26, 2010 at 2:39 pm

“Noxious ideology” and “wild political overreach.” So thats what they are calling “black” nowadays?

One Yield Regular July 26, 2010 at 2:41 pm

“So the conservative agenda is, in a word, refudiation.”

Truer words may never have been spoken.

SayItWithWookies July 26, 2010 at 2:41 pm

This is just a continuation of several conservative tropes — that of memorializing their biggest fuck-ups (Ronald Reagan International Airport), of claiming after-the-fact that their stupidity is actually an idea (cf. Michael Steele’s gaffes are part of his plan) and finding something so stupid that it’s catchy and repetitive (i.e. Death Panels). That ability of Kristol and his ilk to make the most of a bad situation is known as serendipshitity. Free for your next column, Bill.

Blogette July 26, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Bill, Bill, Bill. We all know you want to refudiate Sarah Palin over and over and over. And over again. But honey, haven’t you heard? She doesn’t get outta bed for less than $100,000. Outta her bed, that is. So pony up, cowboy and she might consider it.

Prommie July 26, 2010 at 2:42 pm

[re=625725]mookworthjwilson[/re]: How about “Isreali Agent?”

Lionel Hutz Esq. July 26, 2010 at 2:43 pm

Clearly, the better and more honest choice for Mr. Kristol of a word associated with the non-Governor of Alaska for the Conservative movement is “Retardation.”

Or he could have gone with “Rhythm Method,” since Republican programs lead to you being screwed, and work about as well as Bristol’s family planning method.

ShamWow July 26, 2010 at 2:43 pm

I could care less that for all intensive purposes the word refudiate is supposebly ain’t a word.

fictional character July 26, 2010 at 2:45 pm

press 1 for english?

Panquake July 26, 2010 at 2:46 pm

[re=625726]Dashboard_Buddha[/re]: Kristol is the specific type of craven bottom who would suck Palin’s strap-on as if it were real.

chascates July 26, 2010 at 2:47 pm

One of the latest tweets of the Grisly Mama links to Kristol’s latest pronouncement that although an Israeli strike on Iran is better than none at all “American action is preferable, and desirable.” And he’s been so right in the past. Since they create their own reality they can also create their own language.

Okie Dokie Dog July 26, 2010 at 2:47 pm

I used to watch that Sunday morning FOX “news” program… always hoping for a Billy K and Juan Williams bitch slapping brawl. Alas, it never happened, so I quit watching. Well that reason plus I was starting to add more vodka than orange juice to my glass.

carlgt1 July 26, 2010 at 2:48 pm

wow, this is hilarious, so now the pseudo-intellectuals are scrambling to reverse-engineer some sense into the vapid utterings of the leading moronic candidates!

freakishlystrong July 26, 2010 at 2:49 pm

[re=625730]Prommie[/re]: I had just “cntrl-c’d” that. I mean, that’s fucking rich coming from Bloody Bill, amiright?

ManchuCandidate July 26, 2010 at 2:49 pm

You poor pathetic people. Mocking Bill Kristol? For shame.

He’s the successful masterful intellectual giant compared to you liebral dumbs. He uses a word from the intallactual giant like SARAH PALIN and YOU PATHETICALLY MOCK THIS GREAT US AMERICAN!!

He’s been so successful at… at… nope, not Iraq… the Winning McCain Preznit campaign, er, no… the campaign against death panels… um, his outstanding military record… his… his… the fact he’s never been pied in the face, uh, not that either…

hmmm… you mock a man who’s been potty trained. Yes, you pathetic libtards mocking the potty trained.

Surfeit O'Hubris July 26, 2010 at 2:50 pm

I believe Jon Stewart is back from vacation tonight, and I see the Smirk-Grimacing Fail is angling for yet another invite.

For the 148,000th time, Billy Crystal has more credibility as a political commentator than Billy Krystol.

Panquake July 26, 2010 at 2:50 pm

Oh, Billy. It must really suck to know that the intellectual powerhouse your father wanted has degenerated into the dumbest horseshit being fed to the base modern “conservatism” crafted. And now Obama will kill all the Jews, because that is the lesson of Neo-Con History.

Extemporanus July 26, 2010 at 2:51 pm

In conservative politics, the word “refudiate” is what’s known as a “neoconlogism”.

mookworthjwilson July 26, 2010 at 2:51 pm

[re=625735]Prommie[/re]: that’s two words…smush them together and you have a new word…Israelgent?

MLM July 26, 2010 at 2:51 pm

So, they are truly the party of No, then, just like those dastardly liberals have said? Because whatever bastardization of language they’re using to accomplish it, this Kristol person just said that the Republican agenda boils down to “no libruhlism”. So, they have no actual platform, no actual goals, just “whatever you do, we hate it”.


freakishlystrong July 26, 2010 at 2:52 pm

Never have so few been wrong about so much. And so fucking loud about it.

Surfeit O'Hubris July 26, 2010 at 2:53 pm

[re=625747]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Sorry, but before I accept your claims I’ll need to see a certificate of potty-training. Long form only, please.

Sharkey July 26, 2010 at 2:54 pm

Come on, this is just recockulous.

Radiotherapy July 26, 2010 at 2:54 pm

[re=625724]WarAndGee[/re]: MALPRIAPISM: it’s when you mix up a word and you end up with a big poop-stained, hookworm infested cock in your mouth.

doxastic July 26, 2010 at 2:55 pm

Why invent “refudiate” when ressentiment is so much more accurate?

Asa Hawks July 26, 2010 at 2:56 pm

Jesus Christ. Shut up Bill Kristol. Just shut up.

Extemporanus July 26, 2010 at 2:58 pm

[re=625708]JMP[/re]: [re=625719]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: [re=625723]Scaggsville guy[/re]: Sarah Palin’s twats display a mastery of the English haranguage.

Zorg July 26, 2010 at 2:59 pm

So much for the value of a Harvard education, magna cum laude and Ph.D. and all that.

Mad Brahms July 26, 2010 at 3:00 pm

[re=625766]doxastic[/re]: Heh, it’s *much* more accurate. What exactly has been “refudiated” lately, in the sense of either of its root words? There haven’t so much been counterarguments as much as “But the NAACP is even more racist!” misdirections.

chaste everywhere July 26, 2010 at 3:02 pm

[re=625739]ShamWow[/re]: For all insundry reasons, your right (irragardless).

Native of SL UT July 26, 2010 at 3:02 pm

Sadly, this word is going to become part of the English language. I just hope the definition comes out to be: to reject without knowing what the fuck you’re talking about.

Mad Farmer Manifest July 26, 2010 at 3:02 pm

I refudiate your use of “Human Dildo” to describe Willy Kristol. 6 out of 5 gynecologists recommend not ever putting him into a vagina.

peeno nwar July 26, 2010 at 3:04 pm

Who cares? Buncha baloney anyway. The conservative agenda is about Misuderestimating, just like always.

RoscoePColtraine July 26, 2010 at 3:04 pm

[re=625773]Extemporanus[/re]: Until theres a pliable alternative, wheel just have to take Kristol’s advise at face value, and follow his recommendations implicitly.

Oblios Cap July 26, 2010 at 3:04 pm

We are conservatives. We ordinarily shun novelties of all kinds, including new words.

More proof that wetsuit wearing, double dildo buttsecks has been around since the beginning of time. Thanks for the history lesson, KristolMeth.

proudgrampa July 26, 2010 at 3:06 pm

The following people are spinning in their graves:

1. Barry Goldwater
2. William F. Buckley
3. William Safire

They weep, also.

SayItWithWookies July 26, 2010 at 3:09 pm

[re=625773]Extemporanus[/re]: She’s a real harangue-utan alright.

mcc July 26, 2010 at 3:10 pm

I seem to remember, in 1994, as the Republican takeover of the House approached, we saw a new and dynamic breed of Republican leadership jump onto the national scene and boldly lay out an agenda to unify the party behind, saying, this is what we will do that the Democrats will not, this is the reason you should vote for us.

This year we’ve got Bill Kristol trying to build a political philosophy around a typo on a web site, and a Steele/Breitbart double header to represent the RNC.

Maybe the Republicans aren’t as big of a threat this year as people were saying.

Dashboard_Buddha July 26, 2010 at 3:17 pm

[re=625742]Panquake[/re]: Band name win: Billy and the Craven Bottoms.

M Lite July 26, 2010 at 3:21 pm

She’s the Manchurian candidate, of the Neocons on foreign policy and the Theocons on domestic policy. They want to get her in office and pull her strings. She’s inherently instable and viscously ambitious, so what happens when she “Goes Rogue” on them? Palin always reminds me of the story with the Fox and the Ginger Bread Man…they just keep getting a little closer to the brightly lipsticked maw.

Jim89048 July 26, 2010 at 3:24 pm

[re=625787]proudgrampa[/re]: You beat me to Safire, but I’m not so sure his wordiness would overpower his ideology here.

wilbro July 26, 2010 at 3:26 pm

Also, Trig is the teatard messiah born immiraculously from Sarah, and Todd never doubted God is the baby daddy.

Extemporanus July 26, 2010 at 3:27 pm

[re=625785]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: Bill Kristol is booked on phonics:

“To computate how it works, I will intersex with a perverted deviant by using one of my own penal implants.

[re=625790]SayItWithWookies[/re]: That sour cunt’s nothing more than a lemon hair-angue pie in high heels.

(“lemon hair-angue pie” = Double Word Score!)

M Lite July 26, 2010 at 3:28 pm

By “viscously” I meant her bodily fluids driver her to it. Maybe I should have used “viciously,” but Palin and fluids gave me starbursts.

sati demise July 26, 2010 at 3:29 pm

[re=625742]Panquake[/re]: oh snap!

[re=625747]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I dispudiate your conclended. Any evidiact that is true?

Manos: Hands of Fate July 26, 2010 at 3:38 pm

I found Kristol’s piece to be in the same vein as Edmund Burke’s Reflections on the Revolution in France — if Burke’s polemic was written by a retarded shrew that is.

Neilist July 26, 2010 at 3:55 pm

Bill, as a “fellow conservative,” allow me to offer the following thought:


Yours in brotherhood,


Surfeit O'Hubris July 26, 2010 at 4:03 pm

[re=625831]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Massive fucking win.

Neilist July 26, 2010 at 4:09 pm

Oh, and one other thing:

“Just before noon on Sunday, July 18, 2010, Sarah Palin enriched the English language.”

That may rank as the Stupidest Declarative Sentence Ever Written.”

In the “English language,” anyway.

hillbilly4u July 26, 2010 at 4:15 pm

I object to Bill being labled a “human dildo”. Dildos can cause pleasure and relaxation. I prefer “perinoidal cyst rush?”, or something more relevant.

Failed 2 Menace July 26, 2010 at 4:16 pm

So two separate elements swam together and forged something new within Sarah, but something about the resulting entity was not quite right.

That’s twice in a row for her!

El Pinche July 26, 2010 at 4:28 pm

Kristol is goin Hannity!! Fuck yeah!

AnnieGetYourFun July 26, 2010 at 4:30 pm

You can keep licking all you want, Billy. Sarah isn’t going to give you a cabinet position no matter what you say or do.

Tim July 26, 2010 at 4:47 pm

The conservative platform, updated:
1. Stop Chinesentation of the economy!
2. STOP the Mexicaneuvering across our borders!
3. Expand gunsciousness

Barrelhse July 26, 2010 at 4:54 pm

Bill, are you trying to lend credibility to Palin’s stupidity? I think it backfired, Bucko.

Barrelhse July 26, 2010 at 4:55 pm

And “just say ‘refudiate’!”. Also.

sati demise July 26, 2010 at 5:01 pm

[re=625845]Neilist[/re]: tell us how you really feel, ‘mkay? always so obscure.

Snidely July 26, 2010 at 5:09 pm

Like twins locked in an attic by abusive parents, they are creating their own language.

Fuck Toad July 26, 2010 at 5:16 pm

Maybe Kristol can explain what the fuck it means for Muslims to ‘refute’ a building?

XOhioan July 26, 2010 at 5:22 pm

Sad. Bill still thinks there’s a chance of getting a motorboat from Mistress Palin.

Lawtalkinguy July 26, 2010 at 6:02 pm

Damn, I bet this crap was what he was writing when I saw him on the train on Tuesday. I knew I should have pushed him off the platform when I had the chance.

lumpenprole July 26, 2010 at 6:09 pm

Wait a second. I’m still trying to wrap my head around the idea that reading GOP rhetorical boilerplate off her hand revealed Palin’s SuperAmerican authenticity. Now her brainfarts are a GOP war cry? Can we just skip to the part where only people carrying a special needs kid are allowed to speak? July 26, 2010 at 6:27 pm

Did Harvard actually accept this leaky douchenozzle. They should revoke his degree.

Rotundo July 26, 2010 at 7:25 pm

Bill is doubleplusgood at tardspeak.

Extemporanus July 26, 2010 at 7:35 pm

I would like to take a moment to note that Riley Waggaman’s first “Rumors-less”, unabridged effort in quite some time has the highest number of pageviews, and second-highest number of comments (down by only 3!), of any post currently on the front page.

In other words: Thanks, Epstein’s Mother!

schlock and flaws July 26, 2010 at 8:01 pm

We need the lede poster on a T-shirt, in WonketteMart, STAT.

Tommmcatt July 26, 2010 at 8:17 pm


Buttering him up won’t get him to let you buttsexx him, I’ve tried it and all I get are buttery fingers.

Jesus Troubez July 26, 2010 at 8:38 pm

[re=625732]One Yield Regular[/re]: It really does embiggen the soul.

maven July 26, 2010 at 9:00 pm

How about “refusiation”, from the root refuse, as in waste, to use as a description of the garbage Kristol hurls from his mouth and pen.

grevillea July 26, 2010 at 9:00 pm

What an ignoranus.

Oldskool July 26, 2010 at 9:11 pm

Non-words, non-people, same thing.

the problem child July 26, 2010 at 9:13 pm

[re=626071]Extemporanus[/re]: It’s Kristolnaucht. Let’s hope he stays broken.

June Cleaver 2.0 July 26, 2010 at 9:32 pm

[re=625724]WarAndGee[/re]: [re=625752]mookworthjwilson[/re]: You guys are killing me on this thread!

Zorg July 27, 2010 at 1:32 am

[re=625970]XOhioan[/re]: Maybe not the whole motorboat, just the Dutch rudder.

Mel Phistopheles July 27, 2010 at 9:38 am

Don’t forget, this is BILL KRISTOL we’re talking about. The man who literally gets everything wrong. Everything. Wrong. There’s an amazing montage of his wrong, idiotic statements on an old Daily Show from a while back. Whenever I hear his horrible name or voice, I just keep telling myself that he’s the amazing pundit who still gets listened to despite the fact that he’s always wrong about everything. And he’s neck and neck with Glen Beck, which should go without saying. Argh.

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