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  • Seriously, where are the trust-fund hippies to clean this oil off of me?Deathstorm Bonnie is currently taking its talents to South Beach and raining and blowing really hard but not much else. Bonnie is a disorganized mess cut up by wind shear but that isn’t stopping her from wreaking all kinds of havoc: relief-well drilling and cleanup operations have been suspended until the storm passes. It has, however, been downgraded to a Tropical Depression. You know who else is depressed? All the oily pelicans and flaming turtles. [NOAA]
  • BP’s engineers have such confidence in the new Wondercap installed on the Macondo that they’re going to leave it unmonitored while Tropical Storm Depression Bonnie swirls by. They were really confident about the Deepwater Horizon rig before it exploded, too. [Biloxi Sun Herald]
  • Rep. Ed Markey & Rep. Henry Waxman blame Dick Cheney and his Halliburton Weather Machine for destroying the Gulf of Mexico. You see, this plan was hatched in 2002 deep in Cheney’s secret lair underneath the U.S. Naval Observatory. [Big Government]
  • Shutting off alarms, bells, whistles and flashing lights on oil rigs is completely normal, says a guy from Transocean. It’s standard practice and occurs regularly on Navy and Coast Guard vessels. Nobody wants to wake up at 3 a.m. to a false alarm … they want to wake up to things on fire and shit exploding at 3 a.m. [Houston Chronicle]
  • Question: Does God hate New Orleans? Answer: Yes. [Salon]
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