The wait is over … and did you even realize you were waiting, all this time, for this? WonketteMart has opened for business, with our first batch of custom-designed beautiful, shocking Wonkette Fake Campaign Shirts. Go, look, and pre-order today to save money$$$. What is happening?
About six months ago, your Wonkette Industries management got together in some sexting chatroom and said, to nobody in particular, “Jesus, what does it take to actually get some ideas turned into actual products and online stores and warehouses and shipping and all that?” The answer, it turns out, is “many months of work and hassle and inspiration and bitter, bitter tears.”
These are the first official Wonkette items for sale, ever, in America or anywhere else. Much more quality stuff — laptop skins, books, patriotic dildos — will follow this inaugural batch of WonketteMart campaign Tees, imagined by your Wonkette editors and turned into quality silkscreened slave-free garments by a consortium of graphics and apparel professionals, including design work by an anonymous Fancy Pants Designer you may know by his Wonkette commenter name, “Corduroypants.” It’s all warehoused and shipped and customer-serviced and piloted by Amplifier in Austin, known for running the online stores of other beloved American Comedy Internet brands such as The Onion, Achewood and the Homestar Runner. Your happiness/sexytime is assured. [WonketteMart]