Famous playwright Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol announced last week that true love does exist as she and Levi Johnston are getting married next month. But it appears Sarah Palin has chosen tragedy andwill not be attending this solemn ceremony, according to a “family friend.” Will Bristol and Levi be completely disowned by the Palin clan and no longer be eligible for the co-presidency? Will Sarah sell her prized Trig back to his real mother? SO MANY QUESTIONS.
“It’s going to be the wedding of the century in Alaska. Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles’ wedding,” a Palin family friend told me with a straight face. “Everyone would kill to get an invite even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift. It’s just too bad that her mother has refused to attend. Although I can’t say I blame her after everything that boy has put her through.”
Even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift! Wow! That must be a major event, to spend money on those two.
Bristol and Levi are not even asking for money from her parents for their wedding! (As it is being paid for by a gossip magazine? Well, let’s hope. Otherwise, those will be some depressing photos.) And they do not even want a gift. A gift! Gifts are the most important part about entering into a union with another person for the rest of your life, as we learn from this family friend.
But, folks, we have a hero:
“With or without Sarah, Todd will be walking his daughter down the aisle,” the friend says. “He has been looking forward to this day ever since Bristol was a little girl and wouldn’t miss it for anything or anyone.”
Aww, Todd is going to put her on his sled and mush her to the altar! Adorable. Almost as adorable as Levi and Tripp’s matching camo vests will be.
But why is Sarah Palin being so evil about this? You need to forgive Levi, Sarah. Because if you let the little things get to you, you will miss a whole lot of life, an old lady probably said in a movie one time. What will be the next event she boycotts? Her presidential inauguration? The grand opening of the Sarah Palin Six-Term-Presidential Library and Moose Petroleum Institute? THE RAPTURE?
THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO THESE KIDS, SARAH. Look, Team Sarah is down, probably because of evil Wonketters. THIS IS A BAD OMEN. [PopEater]
{ 155 comments }
Put her ON the sled?
Jack, you missed the point: Bristol will be PULLING the sled.
It’s “Wedding Grift“, Silly!
Sarah Palin is anti-family
Shakespeare did this sorta thing all the time.
Another episode of Palin Place (does anyone remember, anyone?)
Sarah decided not to attend when she found out the presents go to the couple, not the bride’s mother.
Hopefully, the Washington Post will allow her to follow in Sally Quinn’s footsteps and print Palin’s lengthy, rambling excuse as to why she can’t make it.
How does one quit a non-appearance?
She’ll refudiate this. In the heartland, it stabs in the heart to not attend the weddings of young parents.
Look, Team Sarah is down
Now she’s boycotting her own site.
Man, deciding not to go must have been like Sophie’s Choice for Palin.
Oh, Sarah, so bitter, so very bitter. Someday you won’t refudiate the pure, true love that springs from the tundra like Reindeer Moss.
“Everyone would kill to get an invite even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift.” Even if it meant killing AND buying a gift. Won’t they just accept wolf carcases dragged to the alter like the old days?
Bristol has made her decision : goodbye political dynasty, hello C-level reality stardom ala Tori Spelling.
Does this mean Mercede & MethMaw can come? Mercede posted on her web site that she would be happy to help with the planning because ‘she has great taste’!
I suppose it would an understatement to say that this won’t end well.
Ah well, kids now a days, what is grafter going to do?
Does K-Mart still have a bridal registry?
So are they still going to have the “Touch Trig for a Dollar” booth?
It’s customary for the Brides Father to give her away, but can you imagine the Grifty McSnowshoes just giving that cash cow Bristol away…like, fer nuthin’? Yeah, right…
after he walks bristol down the aisle, Todd, Levi and I will retire to the lodge and play a round or six of hide the sausage! woof!
Can’t wait to see the matching tattoos on the wedding party.
“…even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift”
I really want to know what constitutes “expensive” in Wasilla. Pack of cigs and a case of Natty Light?
Mother, do you think you’ll shoot Levy?
Mother, do you think they’ll buy our show?
Mother, do you think you’ll go and bust Levy’s balls?
Mother, should I get married?
Mother, should you run for President?
Mother, should you loot the government?
Mother, will you put me on the firing line?
Is it just a waste of time?
Hush now baby, baby, I won’t cry
Momma’s gonna make all of your nightmares come true
Momma’s gonna direct her anger at you
Momma’s gonna keep you right here under her wing
She won’t let you fly, but she might let you grift
Momma’s wants to keep Bristol quite Levy free
Oooo Babe
Oooo Babe
Ooo Babe, of course Momma’s gonna sulk and pout and whine.
[re=621565]Joshua Norton[/re]: Or two bucks to spit on your hand and smooth his hair with it.
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]: Oh christ, stop outing us olds.
I think the problem is contractual. Bristol’s speaking fee is between $15K and $30K. Mama’s is $100K.
Bristol was only willing to pay the $70K difference between Bristol’s range and Mom’s number. But Mom insists that Bristol has no historical basis for her $30K fee and will only offer the $15K offset.
Levi, not even able to get his expenses paid to shill at county fairs, is not a factor.
This just proves she has the Reagany-Reagan-ness of true Reaganity. Ronnie Reagan refudiated several of his children, at various times. When Bristol finally bares her “Bristol Cities” for Playboy, then the Reaganacity will be complete.
Sarah will swoop in last-minute and steal the show. Just like Jesus would.
So she’s a bitter, spite-filled bitch even to her own family? Good to know.
This is what happens when the Wasilla Community Players puts on King Lear.
Yeah, and we all know how that Princess Di and Prince Charles thing turned out.
I wonder if Track and Trucker or whatever those kids names are, will be ring bearers or something.
I wonder if a couple of wolves will be slaughtered for the Alaskan style barbi que.
Damn these people for keeping all the good weddin’ grifts to themselves and not sharing any with the gay folks.
Well back to the real world of lol kittehs.
“…and little Trig is the ring bearer…….Trig?…..Trig?…Where’d he get to?…….
Ah Jesus!!….he swallowed the fuckin’ things……”
[re=621563]chascates[/re]: Really: the presence or absence of Mercede is the biggest question of all, after “How long until Bristol kicks him out or busts him for spousal abuse?”
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]: Of course. Mia Farrow got her start on “Peyton Place.”
Book politics makes strange bed fellows, which raises the question, who she gonna use da taser on now?
[re=621555]JMP[/re]: First, Sarah must retreat to her marble lakeside tholos to think.
Two households, both alike in indignity,
In fair Wasilla, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross’d lovers take their life;
Whole misadventured piteous overthrows
Do with their death bury their parents’ strife.
The fearful passage of their death-mark’d love,
And the continuance of their parents’ rage,
Which, but their children’s end, nought could remove,
Is now the two hours’ traffic of our stage;
The which if you with patient ears attend,
What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend.
[re=621564]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: I believe the couple are registered at the Wasilla Dollar General
And still she hasn’t shown up for the Special Olympics.
Sickening!
I’m guessing Bristol’s PR firm is no longer retained by SarahPac. That must mean that little Pillow, or Pistol, or whatever her name is, is going to have to become a PR expert pronto.
“Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles’ wedding,”
HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAAHHHAHAHHAHAHAH… (pausing for breath)
“Everyone would kill to get an invite even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift.
No, Pleeease… HAHHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHA (gasping for breath)
“It’s just too bad that her mother has refused to attend. Although I can’t say I blame her after everything that boy has put her through.”
SERIOUSLY, just STOP! … HAHHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHA (passes out)
Wait a minute, the alt-text, for real, those maniacal idiots actually put together that picture of the ghostly Saint Ronnie saluting Sarah of Wasilla? Jeezus, thats fucking insane. We are so fucked, as a country. Who fucking decided that morons should get to vote?
“Grifty McSnowshoes” is Fucky McWinO’theafternoon.
How sharper than a grizzly’s tooth is an ungrateful grifter parent, who shouldst not have been old till she hadst been wise.
[re=621571]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Nice.
LOOK GUYS THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL THING TRIPP WILL NOW HAVE A REAL STABLE FAMILY THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU HOMOS ARE TRYING DESTROY THE SANCTITY OF THEIR HOLY MATRIMONY!!!!1!!11!
heh heh.
(Sarah Palin=anti-family homo-sexual)
Abstinence my ass. What was he doing in her bedroom puttin’ flowery petals n such on her bed for then? Hunh? So they could lie down on rose petals and not touch each other?
This smells like a lame Palin con. They leak that she’s not attending, so she can have a lamestream media bitching point when she actually shows up for the Bistol and Levi keg party. Or whatever they do for weddings up there.
Sarah’s giving the wedding the dreaded 404.
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]: Yep! Mia Farrow was such an innocent ingénue and Ryan O’Neil was every mother’s fantasy of a son-in-law.
“Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles’ wedding.”
This bodes well.
It’s only official when Apple Daily makes a video of the big fight at the wedding.
Obi-Wan-Regan’s ghost says a true conservative wedding has a pay bar or BYOB!
[re=621597]Woodwards Friend[/re]: So you’re suggesting the quitter is going to quit quitting the now-unquit wedding?
Classic sociopath.She pretends she won’t come, for attention. Then SHE becomes the star of the wedding, the monkey-shoed elephant NOT in the room! Then she can sweep in last minute and become the STAR who Forgives just like our Lord.
[re=621591]Prommie[/re]: I thought they were going back to their conservative roots, you know, like fiscal responsibility. What’s Raygun got to with that?
Hope Radar.com gets the Sarah/Bristol phone tapes. “I’ll blow up the fucking church! Arghhhh!!!!”
Muzzle tov!
(It works on two levels, you guys!)
[re=621584]RPolanski[/re]: Needs more refudiation.
[re=621584]RPolanski[/re]: “Expensive gifts” wax poor when givers prove unkind.
So, Sarah successfully made Bristol’s wedding ALL about Sarah. She is truly a PIECE of work.
[re=621623]actor212[/re]: Refudiarie.
If mama grizzly isn’t at the wedding, she’ll be hunting the groom from a helicopter – and that camo vest won’t save the boy.
I have a hunch that little princess Bristol may be knocked up again which would explain why the short notice and the snub from mama grizzly.
Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.
Leo Tolstoy
“It’s going to be the wedding of the century in Alaska. Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles’ wedding,” a Palin family friend told me with a straight face.
–
Obviously ghey.
[re=621555]JMP[/re]: Hopefully, the Washington Post will allow her to follow in Sally Quinn’s footsteps and print Palin’s lengthy, rambling excuse as to why she can’t make it.
Post Points for JMP!
Will there be a chicken dance, or will they just let wounded wolves Sarah shot stalk the reception guests?
[re=621627]SwanSwanH[/re]: LOL! are you honest?
[re=621563]chascates[/re]: If Mercede were to plan the wedding, I imagine it would look like some unholy union between THIS and THIS.
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]: Remember?! It’s etched in my mind forever. And come to think of it, they even LOOK like Norman and Rita.
[re=621568]Jim89048[/re]: Lucky you, your wait is over!
Stab me in the heart why don’t you, Sarah?! This is crushing news. Think of the children, Sarah, the children! Plus, WHO will bring the shot-guns to this wedding, I ask you, WHO?!?! Where are my smelling salts, I am overcome!
The grifter is probably still haggling over her appearance fee. And bendy straws.
Will the groom’s mother allowed to attend on grounds of good behavior?
I say we send Ken up there with a Toaster oven as a buy-in just to have a fly on the wall.
Also too…..unfortunate reference to Princess Diana and Prince Charles – don’t people remember they divorced with lots of public nastiness + a long-time mistress + gross tapes of gross conversations with lovers after the “fairy tale” wedding that was supposed to last forever?
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]:
My, you’re about my age. Isn’t it time for your (our) nap now?
Sarah Palin being petty and vindictive? Gwan, pull the other one.
Bristol just couldn’t come up with Mom’s appearance fee.
[re=621586]Escape Goat Nation[/re]:
And still she hasn’t shown up for the Special Olympics.
Sickening!
–
Well, I have heard she was entered into the “mangled profundity” race. Which we know, she could win hands down. However on the way to the starting blocks she was rapturously captivated by a bottle cap sparkling in the sun.
SARAH PALIN AGAINST HETEROSEXUAL MARRIAGE!
UNWED MOTHERS BETTER TO REMAIN SINGLE: SARAH PALIN!
NEVER MARRY ONCE VIRGINITY LOST SEZ SARAH.
Let’s go, folks.
(Oh, and Sarah probably had a prior engagement, such as appearing as Mrs. Malaprop or Shakepears.)
[re=621631]jus_wonderin[/re]: You’re right about that. [re=621575]Fox n Fiends[/re]: Yeah. Has the smell of grift drama on it. Especially after he made that “apology”/refudiation. [re=621644]Tarangela[/re]: wounded turkeys, half ground.
[re=621575]Fox n Fiends[/re]: “Sarah will swoop in last-minute and steal the show. Just like Jesus would.” Either that, or she’ll sell herself as a color commentator for the inevitable live coverage on the E! network. But don’t despair, Wonketeers, E! will dress her up like a Kardashian and it’ll supplant the image of that Belmont Stakes outfit in your minds forever.
[re=621597]Woodwards Friend[/re]: So you think Bible Spice will show-up. If so, will she be doing keg stands?
I hope Mercade goes and live-tweets the fuck out of that thing!
Mercade’s iphone: Bing! Bing! Bing!
Bristol: Welcome, Mercade;
But that thou interrupt’st our merriment.
Mercade: Sorry, sis! Someone just tweeted, ow;
my tongue piercing is, sorry, I think it’s infected;
they just said that your Mom…
Bristol: Has died of embarrassment?
Mercade: OMG! You’re so psychic Bris!
Levi: LULZ!
“Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles’ wedding…”
And that worked out really well, even with the wedding before the first kid was born.
Since the Johnston-Palins live so close to Russia, they will probably want to stage an emulation of this fine Russian wedding: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLJaQhajM9s
I searched and searched and searched for a Shakespearian line that comes close to the phrase, “For $10.00 will you show us your tits?” But alas, all I could come up with was:
Desdemona: [Singing] The poor soul sat sighing by a sycamore tree,
Sing all a green willow:
Her hand on her bosom, her head on her knee,
Sing willow, willow, willow:
The fresh streams ran by her, and murmur’d her moans;
Sing willow, willow, willow;
Her salt tears fell from her, and soften’d the stones;
Lay by these:–
Othello, Scene 3
But, I did get a twofer by getting Willow’s name into the quote.
It’s a pity I can’t attend, I’ll have to read about it in the newspapers and magazines…
[re=621632]SwanSwanH[/re]: Isn’t that what happens when the fudiate turns out to have e. coli?
[re=621568]Jim89048[/re]: WIN!
[re=621589]SlouchingTowardsWasilla[/re]: Trig’s name is Pillow, because that is what was under the large scarfs she wore for a month.
Too bad about mama grizzly but what I’d like to know is if the McCains are on the invitation list. I think that their gift would be the usual: Cindy maintaining an upright position and thin smile while under the influence of a massive drug cocktail.
[re=621693]RPolanski[/re]: “For $10.00 will you show us your tits?”
That has “pound of flesh” written alll over it…
[re=621569]ShamWow[/re]: It’s Alaska. A gallon of milk costs something like $7. So yes, cigarettes and a case of Natty Lite would be perfection, and just about within the $75-$100 lower range of gift-giving parameters.
Expensive gifts? Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if the snowbillies charge admission. Plus, the lame brains at the gossip mags will pony up six figures for “exclusive pictures” of the event. This will be just another con job. Bristol will pump out another kid before the end of the year. The “marriage” will last maybe two years, if that.
[re=621693]RPolanski[/re]: Yes, you got Willow’s name in- but I think my shakespeare that is right before yours is much better. Lesser known works anyone? Fuck- Mercade is a character in that play!
[re=621708]Extemporanus[/re]: Why perforce!! How cans’t I have neglected the shining light of midday?
ANTONIO
The duke cannot deny the course of law:
For the commodity that strangers have
With us in Venice, if it be denied,
Will much impeach the justice of his state;
Since that the trade and profit of the city
Consisteth of all nations. Therefore, go:
These griefs and losses have so bated me,
That I shall hardly spare a pound of flesh
To-morrow to my bloody creditor.
Well, gaoler, on. Pray God, Bassanio come
To see me pay his debt, and then I care not!
I shall pay thee not lest I be dealt bendy straws.
[re=621693]RPolanski[/re]: The Tempest Act 3, Sc. 3
So the next door neighbor will get to catch the wedding for free just by peering over the fence that Todd built? Now we know why he rented that house.
Putin’s head will rise out of Bering Sea to watch. Also.
[re=621721]actor212[/re]: You’ve brought the house down.
So she’s going to fly over in a helicopter, probably
[re=621566]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: Yeah, this thing is fucking Golden!
OH NOES!
Sarah has discovered Tucker Carlson’s earth shattering JournoList thingy and now has proof of everything she has ever thought about the Lamestream media is true!
http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=410455148434
[re=621693]RPolanski[/re]: Back in the day before the Darpanet, there was a human American named Allan Sherman. Here he discusses Willow at length.
[re=621760]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: May the light keep shining!
I cannot face another decade or two of this shrieking harridan in the public arena. If NASA needs a volunteer for a deep space mission sign me up.
[re=621729]Oblios Cap[/re]: Peering over the fence? He’ll be ducking empty silver bullets and there will be torrents of urine coming under the thing. Puke also. I’m thinking that this will go down in Alaskan history as the greatest kegger since the goldrush. [re=621684]Zorg[/re]: This seemed a bit tame in comparison with what these folks are like, needs more guns, trucks up on blocks and vomiting, but this would probably be like the wedding party during one of the quieter more decorous moments. After the best man speech I would be wearing kevlar if I were in attendance.
[re=621551]Prommie[/re]: I remember. I wasn’t allowed to read it or go watch it.
[re=621580]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: I am so relieved you “said” this before I did. I thought it immediately. Poor little Trigger.
[re=621575]Fox n Fiends[/re]:
Exactly.
She will run with this “I’m not going because I don’t approve” shtick right up until the wedding day, then show up at the church for a tearful hug with those two-crazy-kids (in front of the cameras of course), the trailer parks across America will then rejoice, and they will all live happily-ever-after (until the divorce). The End.
Remember, Sarah has her own in home Fox TeeVee studio. Watch for the exclusive Fox coverage of the event. Maybe Sarah can wear her wedding outfit LIVE LIVE LIVE on Fox News!
Mercede may go to the wedding but she isn’t very friendly with TeamLevi. From her web site today:
Who really has Levi’s best interests at heart? The private investigator and attorney who will not return a phone call unless there is money involved? Or the mother and sister who have been on his “team” since back before he was famous, and only his friends and family knew Levi Keith Johnston, of Wasilla Alaska? I don’t think that is very hard to figure out.
Is it just me, or does Todd seem like the only decent human being sporting the Palin name. In my drunkest moments, I feel bad for him. He never asked for this shit.
[re=621785]Rotundo[/re]: Rosshia too poor for truknutz. Also, no sale of the handguns. And vomiting is for amateur drinkers…
[re=621778]chascates[/re]: In space, nobody can hear her scream.
Grizzlies do not mate for life and papa Grizzlies tend to eat their young. Mama Grizzly has too weak of a stomach to attend such an event as this wedding. This is Papa Grizz’s firstborn child so he will make a point to be there and give her away. Mama Grizz’s oldest son has a different father, a father who has since passed. Mama Grizz would certainly attend the wedding of her first born child as she has never gotten over the father, although he would not marry her when she was incubating his child.
Bristol reminds Mama Grizz every day of her lost youth and love and it makes Mama Grizz to sad to attend the wedding.
[re=621824]Smoking Bolshevik[/re]: Palin e-mails reveal a powerful ‘first dude’
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/35238034/
Among the emails:
* The governor coached her staff on how to disguise the amount of electrical work needed at the mansion to hook up her new tanning bed.
* Palin and her staff “stewed” over a state agency’s refusal to provide a plane so their children could fly to Todd’s family’s home in Dillingham even though the Palins said it could be justified since they were going to attend a bill signing. Sarah Palin called the decision “outrageous,” and an aide said it provides “a great excuse to privatize” the governor’s jet service.
* The manager of the Palins’ travel schedule searched for a public event to use as justification (“I just need one”) to charge the state for an airplane flight for Palin’s daughter, Willow, who made the trip but had missed the event given as its justification.
[re=621824]Smoking Bolshevik[/re]: Todd also gave Bristol a truck on the condition that she dump Levi. Not saying I necessarily blame him.
[re=621829]LakeLucilleLoon[/re]: It is curious what happened to Menard. Is it possible for water to enter a fuel line on an airmachine by accident?
you actually think that palin can ‘sell trigg back’ to bristol ? she rented the little guy and has failed to pay a dime yet – typical deadbeat . also i hope that if the wedding party goes camo , that levi wears the always “popular” camo jockstrap . period . and i do not care what bristol wears , or whether she even attends her wedding . i hope she doesn’t .
Sarah’s math:
Marriage = one man + one woman + one baby – gramma Sarah
[re=621566]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: you mean that all the money levi made selling his sweaty underwear online went to the grifterbilly to buy out the bristol franchise ???
We really need to send a wedding gift to this couple that has given us so much laughter. Ideas?
[re=621850]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: http://www.cafepress.com.au/+government_cheese_modern_clock,289257473
A timeless gift.
[re=621850]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: One-way tickets to Iran.
[re=621824]Smoking Bolshevik[/re]: Yo, he is *running* the shit. You don’t think Griftette thought this up herself, do ya? The illegal government emails from the Gov’s office that were exposed says Todd was in on everything.
Even though she’s getting a little hustle on, I feel a *little* bad for the bride-to-be and the other girls Willow and Piper. (Remember when Mother Grizzfter used her as a human shield for a fucking hockey game? It was mentioned on a Wonkette post a while ago. http://thinkprogress.org/2009/07/03/palin-hockey-arena-scandal
Ah, I remember that hockeygame; the unsportsmanlike fans for once did my city proud. And embarrased Ed Snyder, the wignut cheapskate owner of the Flyers and Sixers, who once threatened to move both teams to fucking Camden as blackmail for a new stadium.
It is too bad that little Spruce or Ginko or whatever had to be dragged out as a prop and subjected to that, however.
[re=621850]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Trucknutz, of course.
This weddings gonna be like a christopher guest movie
[re=621633]BOOBIES![/re]: knocked up again ? what is that , her 3rd ? she’s still a teen ?
the gift is, she ain’t going to the weddin.
she won’t talk about her fake boobs.
what are we not getting?
I’m interested in hearing how the tea baggers will frame the inevitable negative comparison between Sarah’s no-show and the Clintons’ excited support of their daughter’s wedding.
I bet they’ll get, like, a hunert crockpots.
What happened to cause this? Did Bristol snub wearing the maternity dress her mom wore when she jumped the broom with her dad? How are they going to get the wedding cake from the WalMart to the reception hall if Mama Grizzly doesn’t help?
Smoking Bolshevik, that whole hockey game garbage was so wrong. I was a Flyers fan for 20 years, while living in Delaware, and I’ve been to games where Jill Biden could be spotted, sitting at the games, in her orange sweater, and yet, they picked Palin to drop the puck? Even worse, the arena thugs piped in “canned” applause and cheering over the public address system to cover the “BOOS” that they knew would come. Flyers fans would boo Shirley Temple and dream of skull fucking her after using a ice skate to decapitate her. No decent mother would take her daughter to a Flyers hockey game. Yeah, I took my daughter, ONLY because it was her child support checks that paid for my season tickets, duh! Well, that and someone had to hold my beer while I peed. It’s not like you can leave it with Jill Biden. She’s known as “The Broad Street Backwash Barbie Biden” to those of us who know and love her.
This whole Bristol Palin wedding is annoying. Sarah, “Mothra of Bridzilla” is a shithead for not attending. Then again, I think this is all a dramarama, because there is no way in hell that Mothra would pass up a Me-Me moment like this. She needs to be there to tell people when to throw the puffed rice for Bristol, her husband, her sons and “Sonogram” or whatever they plan to name this baby in January, 2011.
Reagan didn’t go to Ronny’s “wedding” either.
Well, my friends of HER friends in Wasilla say that the greedy cunt was just FINE with it, until she heard about the “expensive gift.”
I can think of two possible explanations for her not attending the Camo Event of the Year:
First possibility: Sarah is scheduled for hookworm treatments.
Second: A teleprompter would seem out of place, and would be needed to say anything nice about the Union.
Oh, and not enough room on the palm of her hand for her speaking notes, also.
I don’t buy for a minute that Sarah is against Bristol and Levi marrying, in fact, I think she’s engineering it. If she wants back into national politics, Palin knows, even in this day and age, she can’t be dragging an unwed-mom daughter onto stages with her. Not and keep the reactionary right-wingers who already think she can do no wrong.
Levi and Bristol will never hurt for the next meal.
If Sarah doesn’t bankroll their closed mouths, the tabloids will buy their yapping ones … and Sarah knows it.
My instinct is that Sarah has exactly the daughter she deserves.
[re=621841]foulmouthed mrscreant[/re]: Mama Griz’s first love was merely a pilot with too many hours under his belt and a sense of complacency regarding the pre-flight checklist. Happens to pilots all the time, but not the best of them. That’s why there aren’t as many old pilots.
Every time Wikileaks misses a story like this I believe more and more they simply don’t care about the right things.
[re=621907]LakeLucilleLoon[/re]: There are old pilots and bold pilots but no old, bold pilots. Speaking of which I can see Snowbilly hiring a smokewriter plane to buzz the wedding. Maybe not as scary as ‘Surrender Dorothy’ but just as vicious.
[re=621693]RPolanski[/re]: I actually know the Shakespeare lines that fit.
Unfortunately, I do.
Titus Andronicus, the rapists, while mutilating Livia. I won’t quote it, as it would be too cruel even by the standards here.
[re=621656]Blogette[/re]: wasn’t there a ‘human tampon’ involved ? for a rottweiller ?
[re=621919]chascates[/re]: OMG, I just had to google “Surrender Dorothy” because I had no idea what you were referring to! Now I feel dumb, because I’ve not seen the Wizard of Oz! I’ve seen snippets but never the entire movie. (Yea, my partner finds this hilarious as well, but for some reason I never saw that movie! He was talking about flying monkeys a few years ago and I had to google it. I’m still puzzled at how so many people know about this movie made in 1939, I mean that would have been my parents movie, not mine, so where would I have seen it?)
[re=621934]LakeLucilleLoon[/re]: you lived it . then died . got reincarnated . prolly …
Bristol wants to be the Ol’ Roy, Queen of the I-ditto-rod, not the Linsay Lohan of Kodiak and end up like Shrubya, living in Mom’s basement, drunk & trying to figure out how to boot-up his $40,000 secret spy detector laptop…developed by pot head hippies from Humboldt..
[re=621544]actor212[/re]: “Bristol will be PULLING the sled.” TRAIN! Bristol will be pulling the TRAIN, not sled. Yer welcome.
[re=621833]chascates[/re]: [re=621837]springfield_meltdown[/re]: I stand corrected.
[re=621719]RPolanski[/re]: “the duke cannot deny the course of law:
The Duke would never deny the course of law, pilgrim, without a fight. Law, justice, the American way. It used to be as popular as cornbread.
[re=621951]villageatrois[/re]: why can you not be reasonable and compromise ? she’s gonna pull a train with dogs . this time .
[re=621707]alzronnie[/re]: Agree that is how Cindy looks. However she has a heart of gold. Why she doesn’t get rid of that jackass is beyond me. She doesn’t live in DC with him.
As for the grifter, no way will she miss the wedding. She’ll be the star. Why does everyone think she’s pg. Do the pics in the magazine look that way?
I’ll be so glad when this woman is dragged down to the pits of hell………..
Matching camo? It. Just. Won’t. Do.
Camo in August would be very, very out-of-season. A definite fashion faux pas and terribly OUTRÉ. Like wearing white patent leather shoes after Labor Day. (Would not be caught dead.)
As it stands, it will probably be matching Black Sabbath tee shirts, torn denims and flip-flops.
Will God’s Angel be the Tramp Stamp bearer? Sorry. Forgot. Grandma Grizzly has refusiated to attend the wedding.
[re=621563]chascates[/re]: Is MethMaw out of prison yet?
Is this wedding still on? I heard they can’t sell the Wasillabillies reality show and the wedding was staged to be the centerpiece of the show. Now what?
[re=621612]Lilybart[/re]: Is Sarah the Lucille Bluth of Alaska?
[re=621707]alzronnie[/re]: “Too bad about mama grizzly but what I’d like to know is if the McCains are on the invitation list…” I’d be very careful about accepting any invitations from that part of the world if I was Walnuts. The welcoming committee would probably be Sarah P, on the roof of the Arrivals terminal with a Mauser.
I have a feeling that a “Mommy Dearest” book/tape/whatever is in the offing! We’ll find out that Sarah trained her by having her molested by bears etc. (Similarities to Neo-Con porn are no accident!!)
If they really, really, really want to piss-off Sarah P. et al., make it a Russian Orthodox wedding! As high liturgically as can be! Russian Orthodox churches are thick in Alaska.
[re=621841]foulmouthed mrscreant[/re]: Condensation in the fuel tank might do it. So would fungus living in the fuel tank. Both imply piss-poor maintenance.
Another wild idea! Why don’t they try to get the Patriarch of North and South America to preside over their conversion and wedding? Could be the best thing since the conversion Harald Hardraada!
Will the Witch Doctor Removal- Pastor of Wasilla be officiating for the Young Grifts?
Will Bristol have to return the fully loaded Escalade to Ma Palin?
Will Ma Palin tweet her bile-filled reactions on Twitter in real time on a giant screen at the wedding?
Will Bill Kristol be there in full Neo Con gear even though Miss Sarah wont be?
Got to celebrate, not refudiate, Sarah!
[re=621849]rmjag[/re]: The boy is trying to figure out how to tap into the Palin Big Bucks Inheritance. It is either try to get some of the old girl’s cash or be an electrician. Sarah is tweeting out their pre-nup as we speak.
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