And Jesus was an illiterate, too!
Illiterate glory slob Sarah Palin mangles English so that her brain-damaged followers can write “peoms” praising her greatness, so why can’t you liberal elitists realize her Twitter-Facebooks are better than what’s his name, Shakespeare, who wrote a pretty good Claire Danes/Leo DiCaprio movie despite being even dumber than Sarah Palin and George W. Bush combined?

For never was a story of more woe. Than this of some Wasilla 'ho.
And then she proved her illiterary genius by quickly thumb-typing two sonnets (?) on her Blackberry about how Othello shouldn’t get busy in Manhattan because it “stabs the heart.” O happy dagger! [Sarah Palin Twitter]

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  1. This could actually be our President. Nothing like celebrating being stupid. I guess if she hit the big red button by accident, she’d celebrate that mistake, too?

  2. Never mind that “refute” wasn’t the correct word to use in this context, but how would “to refudiate” be grammatically different from “to refute”? Is she seriously trying to verbify a word that’s already a verb?

  3. [re=619991]Oblios Cap[/re]: I was thinking more along the lines of

    And thus I clothe my naked villany
    With odd old ends stol’n out of holy writ
    And seem a saint, when most I play the devil.

    for Richard III. Bonus: you don’t have to change any words.

  4. Sarah’s but a mongoloid’s shadow, a poor grifter
    That struts and poops her hour upon the stage: it is a tale
    Tweeted by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
    Signifying nothing.

  5. And you would think Sarah would excel at the 128 character environment! Aren’t her speeches just the same five or six words repeated over and over? “Freedom, mama-grizzlies, founders, Trigg..”

  6. Palin embodies the Republican paradox of education: “We want our kids to go to school, but we don’t want them to KNOW anything. We don’t want them polluted by new-fangled, dangerous, communistic, LIBERAL ideas like curiosity, tolerance, diversity or (God forbid!) questioning authority.” Atta girl, Sarah! Let your “stupid” flag fly!

  7. This is not how language works, Sarah. “Wee-wee’d” up might count, if there’s a speech community that recognized it, actually. But “refudiate” is just an ignorant error, because there’s not some group of people out there who distinctly and consistently use the term to mean something, except for wonkette readers, who are now using it ironically left and right.

  8. [re=620011]Oblios Cap[/re]: Now I’m reminded of Benincasa’s old video about Sarah at the RNC reacting to Joe Lieberman. “We even have a jew!”

  9. [re=620001]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Yes, I was wondering about that, possibly some ghastly euphemism for those delicate creatures who can’t say “Fucked up”?

  10. “Refudiate” is an easy coinage I can live with, but to compare it to “misunderestimate” is like comparing a baked potato to explosive diarrhea.

  11. Hmm…If this was kinda-sweet-actually, do I have to worry about her impolitical comeback?

    “The first thing we do,” Sarah, is “kill all the lawyers.”

  12. “Wee-wee’d up:

    “A sexist (and generally racist) term used for males solving an argument by comparing the size or length of specific body parts.
    Gal: President Obama is really calling out the Senators about health insurance reform.
    Guy: Yeah, he’s not afraid to get wee-wee’d up.” — Urban Dictionary.

    Now, what on earth is a family values lovin’ woman doing tweeting a slang term that has its origin in male body parts?

  13. Wait, I thought the *constitution* was living, and English language was dead, and now yer telling me it’s the other way around or something. CON-fusing.
    I like it better when the whole “living/dead dichotomy” is decided with a poking stick.

  14. (“if you believe catastrophic pain caused” Gahd, she really did DingleBerry® these.) Computer-assisted translation, computer-aided translation, or CAT power to so speaking English.

  15. Its like George Carlin’s bit about cats, when a cat makes a mistake, runs into the screen, skids into a piece of furniture, the cat picks itself up and saunters cooly away, saying “I meant to do that, I meant to do that.”

  16. [re=620010]madirishman[/re]: They’ve solved the problem by home schooling their spawn. The ignorant teaching the ignorant. What could go wrong?

  17. Personally, my favorite part is the part where she takes a momentary break from culture warring on New Yorkers and calling them elitists out of touch with the “Real Americans”, as we call the 19% America living in rural areas, to tell us how we should feel about an attack against [b]our[/b] city.

    Not only is she an illiterate genius like Shakespeare, but she’s also like Sigmund Freud and Mentok, the Mind-taker, all rolled up into one mooseburgery, grifty package.

  18. Shakespeare on Palin

    A fool, an empty purse,
    There was no money in’t: not Hercules
    Could have knock’d out [her] brains, for [s]he had none.
    Cymbeline, 4. 2

  19. I used to think this woman was kind of funny, but this whole “please don’t build a mosque there because your whole religion is kind of evil” schtick just ruined the comedy factor. She is dead to me.

    How now? A rat? Dead, for a ducat, dead!

  20. I too am trying to come up my own new words; what’s the best one to describe a rotten, illiterate, snowbilly grifter and hateful hack who makes me hate this country even more than Bush did?

  21. It should be noted that English is a living language because it routinely adopts other languages’ words — like Taco f.e., a practice that was recently outlawed.

  22. [re=620061]mumblyjoe[/re]: Oh, and also about unrelated building plans in our city, that affect the lives of people who we actually live next to. Which, of course, have nothing to do with the attacks, but again, just to be clear, are ours to deal with however we want. It just pisses me off, how the vast majority of the people whining about the Islamic center, much like the vast majority of people who fetishize 9/11, not only aren’t New Yorkers, but spend most of their lives culture-warring against “elitist New York liberals”, etc.

    Yeah, in New York, we have muslims. Lots of them. Most of us are okay with that, actually, and think they should probably be able to construct/renovate religious buildings to practice their beliefs. But, no, clearly we should listen to someone who’s spent the entire time she’s been in the national spotlight making it crystal clear how much she hates us and our way of life, on what we should do with buildings in our own city.

  23. See when Shakespeare “coined” new terms, he did so intentionally.

    When Palin & Bush “coin” new terms, they do it by accident because they don’t know the real word they’re trying to use.

    That’s like saying toddlers coin a new term for “spaghetti” when they say “bisketti”.

  24. what’s the best one to describe a rotten, illiterate, snowbilly grifter and hateful hack who makes me hate this country even more than Bush did?

    The obvious choice would be to import her brand name into the lingo, like band-aid or xerox. Call her a palin.

    But soft, that way is too easy. Call her the “termaborter”.

  25. Oy. This stupid fucking bitch trying to justify her fuckupery. Right: Fucking William Safire 2, this one.

    Jeebus Cripey on a saltine. Obvious to point out that if she meant to do this, she could have clearly indicated this word choice at the time. But I think a nerve with struck w/ Ms. Grift. She knows she’s as stupid as a pet rock and came up with this overwrought justification to overcompensate. (Linguistic theory isn’t some fucking down-home folk homilie shit. Who wrote this idea out for Sarah I wonder?)

    W, with miseducate, just didn’t give a fuck about being unable to speak but he didn’t say he was redefining English, he just laughed the shit off, cold-hearted bastard that he was/is.

    The mosque shit is ridiculous. She’s so fucking stupid. Mosques are all over fucking New York and have been for a long time. How is it too raw to have a building around? The fuck? If anything, it can be fucking Lower Manhattan building insurance, if the same crazy cast of characters get to scheming…the good angel on my shoulder says its peace assurance, demonstrating harmony, etc, etc.

  26. Snowbilly Queen:
    Olberman and the lame stream media machine pursue me lasting strife,
    If my child be not mine, ever I be a Mama Grizzlie!

    First Dude:
    ‘Tis deeply sworn. Sweet, leave me here a while,
    My head grows dim? Grew dim?, and fain I would beguile
    The tedious day with real work.

    Snowbilly Queen:
    Sleep rock thy brain,
    We’re all Arizonans now!

    Katie Couric:
    The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

  27. I don’t think refute means what she thinks it means. But I guess that doesn’t matter since she is an English speaking “Real American”. I just wonder how hard it is to find a copy of a dictionary these days.

  28. [re=620082]mumblyjoe[/re]: “It just pisses me off, how the vast majority of the people whining about the Islamic center, much like the vast majority of people who fetishize 9/11, not only aren’t New Yorkers, but spend most of their lives culture-warring against “elitist New York liberals”, etc.” Absofuckinglutely, mumbly.

    Wonkers, your Shakespeare rifts are the shit!

  29. Poor retard snowbumpkin, she shouldn’t have done the Reading is Fundamental thing with her gilled hellspawn Trig (who actually sprang from the bucktooth choad of Levi also, prove me wrong with prego pics of Sarah):

    “Look, baby Trig, ‘See Spot. See Spot refudiate.'”

    Poor cleft-palated circus freak was doomed from the start.

  30. Shakespeare wasn’t shit. He wrote something like 36 or something plays and a bunch of poems nobody’s ever read and he only used the word “incarnadine” once. What an idiot-log!

  31. Yeah, let’s all help Sarah celebrate her own stupefying ignorance.

    I was really hoping that the election of Obama would end Bush’s era of, ignorance as virtue.

    But Sarah and the Tea Baggers refuse to let go of their abject idiocy. In your face Libruls, we’re dirt dumb and you’ll never take that away from us!

  32. It’s no accident that her tweet referenced the words, “misunderestimate,” “wee-wee’d up,” and “refudiate.” And, let’s not fool ourselves, Sarah’s tweets are the product of her handlers, not her (She is incapable of independently developing an intelligent thought. Witness her persistent dependence upon talking points during her live, impromptu performances.)

    The three terms or words in question were hand-picked by her handlers to allow the tweet recipients to draw the obvious inference. “Misunderestimate” — George W. Bush. “Wee-wee’d up” — Barack Obama. And now, “Refudiate” — Sarah Palin. The obvious inference is that Palin is the next in line for the office of the presidency.

    Make no mistake about. Her handlers are signaling that there is no doubt that this Talibunny, Grifter, Snowbilly, Skank is running for President in 2012.

  33. I hope future generations of Americans have the time – in between the standard of living ass-kickings they will regularly receive from every decent developed country on the planet – to be ashamed that this sort of rhetoric was accepted and/or embraced by so many of their ancestors.

    A mosque is declared a “provocation.” A MOSQUE.

  34. [re=620009]bbqboy[/re]: You dishonorate the late Senator from Nebraska. Hruska advocated representation for the mediocre, and MooseBitch falls short of that level.

  35. Got an idea for you Sarah.
    Why not spend your PAC money on campaigning to build a Mosque INSIDE the new building so the Muslins CAN’T bomb it.

  36. [re=620012]Mad Brahms[/re]: “except for wonkette readers, who are now using it ironically left and right.”

    And I resent that, also, and resent your abuse of clogging the tubes of the internets to put down readers of wonket. This is the way a mavericky grizzly talks. She should have just pointed out the fact that language evolv–wait, she doesn’t believe in that, either, so she’ll need a new stategery. (If Sarah and George are allowed to make up words, then why not a perfectly respectable SNL comedian?))

    Luke Wilson’s brilliant documentationary (Hey, two can play at the mavericky word game, bitch) film “Idiocracy” clearly demonstrates what happens to America when people the people of “Real America” where I live want a president just like them–that is, just as stupid and semi-literate as they.

  37. I used to have a job, and therefore a boss. My supervisor was marginally more highly educated than I, but was one of those so-called “independent voters” Nevada has so many of. We used to have some spirited discussions on teh politics, but when he began mispronouncing nuclear in solidarity with W I knew he was a lost cause. These are now $arah’s people.

    I need spielcheck in addition to my foxblocker…

  38. That such a slave as this should wear a sword,
    Who wears no honesty. Such smiling rogues as these,
    Like rats, oft bite the holy cords a-twain
    Which are too intrinse t’ unloose; smooth every passion
    That in the natures of their lords rebel;
    Bring oil to fire, snow to their colder moods;
    Renege, affirm, and turn their halcyon beaks
    With every gale and vary of their masters,
    Knowing nought, like dogs, but following.
    A plague upon your epileptic visage!
    Smile you my speeches, as I were a fool?
    Goose, if I had you upon Sarum plain,
    I’ld drive ye cackling home to Camelot.

    Shakespeare even rages better…

  39. I watched this unfold last night and was sad that her followers would cover her precious ass, as they usually do. Boy, was I wrong!

    This went viral and I actually went to her twitter page and was reading what people had to say to her. I once feared that this woman could become the POTUS just by stupid people rising up and voting for her because she was a woman, the mother of a special needs child, etc. Many people would think that she couldn’t possibly be voted in and not bother to vote against her and *poof* we have mayhem in the White House.

    People were ripping her a new asshole left and right last night. She REALLY touched a nerve last night with her bigotry. Some of the better points were:

    a two-block distance in NY city is HUGE, the Mosque won’t be in the lobby of the tower. Even if it were, who cares?
    Muslim people also died on 911
    should a Christian church be prohibited near McVey’s terrorist site?
    since when did she speak for New Yorkers? They aren’t “real Americans”
    Then someone started a Twitter page, SarahPalinasShakespeare and it was hilarious. There was also PalinasShakespeare. Robert Ebert ripped her a new one. Robert Duvall called her a “rancher’s wife”

    There was a great post:
    bubble, bubble
    toil and trouble
    bendy straw
    or my fee will double

    I think she awoke the beast on this one. She thought that she was America’s “darling” and we ALL loved her and would throw money at her feet. I didn’t want to go to bed last night. I just wanted Stewart and Colbert to come on so that we could all remember the absurdity of what she had done.

    I felt completely impotent last night, compared to what others wrote to her. I said, “Can we start calling you the Stratford upon Avon Lady now, ding dong!”

  40. What the hell is “wee-weed’d up?” Is this some kind of thing she’s coined to describe when she’s high? Or is some sort of oblique reference to John McCain?

  41. Since the Rs want all the furiners to speak English, now, or get the fuck out, shouldn’t they clarify which version? Real English, Spanglish, Hindish or Teabaggish?

  42. Not Shakespeare, but still sums up our age:

    “Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
    Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world, “

  43. Thus she shows herself “highly fed and lowly taught” – All’s Well that Ends Well

    In her case, “ending well” would involve an ice floe. Meanwhile, there are at least five institutions of higher learning whose accreditation should be reconsidered forthwith.

  44. [re=620108]maven[/re]: We would have the best parties, we would.

    [re=620128]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Hey, I am one of those readers / writers. “Refudiate” is one of my favorite new “words”. But it doesn’t mean “repudiate”, as Palin seems to believe; it more fully means “repudiate, as said by a snowbilly grifter moran”

  45. [re=620140]ImBarb[/re]: I had the same issue- didn’t want to go to bed just in case i missed something. Seemed like she only had one or two of her fans fapping their hardest to protect her and exclaim how brave she was for speaking truth. Truly fucktacular.

  46. [re=620101]Pandy[/re]: Click in your documents, and a icon appears that looks like a book. When you open it however, übergrifter and refudiate are not in there.

    This reminds me of another time she blatantly showed her ignorance of the English language. After the Couric fiasco, they had her on Fox three days later being spoonfed the answers to Katie’s softball questions. She said she was just being flippant in her answers to to that mean Katie. Actually, her answers were vacuous or vapid, not flippant.

    She may have inadvertently contributed to science and the arts in another way. Her intractable hookworms will be forever mentioned in the Parasitology texts.

  47. [re=620119]RPolanski[/re]: Either that or they were trying to indirectly say that Barry’s mistakes are the same as W’s. That’s their strategy. If you criticize her, then you must criticize him. Otherwise it would be a double standard. The problem with that strategy is that Barry can overcome his slip-ups with a seemilgly intelligent response. She can only cover herself with a high school level mean girl snipe.

  48. [re=620142]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: IIRC, Michelle the Mouth made the phrase popular after Obama said it. It quickly became part of the Lexicon of Conservative Stupidity. Not even they know what it means, or why they use it. Palin herself used it on Leno, as his 1st guest. I guess that supposed to show she’s in touch with the people or whatever.

  49. [re=620177]Radiotherapy[/re]: Did she mean “facetious”? Different word, different meaning! (Still spin, and inaccurate, but at least better spin!)

    Google should hire someone to follow her around, so that whenever she misspeaks they can say “Did you mean *repudiate*?”

  50. [re=620140]ImBarb[/re]: Google #shakespalin. They’re hilarious, and still coming.

    “ajbopp: RT @paulandstorm: [S] All the world’s a stage, and I can see all of it from my house. #shakespalin
    3 minutes ago via web”

  51. [re=620121]Failed 2 Menace[/re]: Well of course it’s a provocation; whenever the follows of one of those other, lesser religions (or those with no religion at all) do anything to remind Christians that they exist instead of groveling before the One True Religion, it’s a great affront and insult against their superiors.

  52. Don’t you libs get it? Fucking up and being stupid/ignorant are now defined as “Breaking Out Of The Mold” and “Being Original” and “Lighting The Way For Others.” You know, like all the GREATS. Sarah Palin is God’s gift to humanity, and so it’s only to be expected that we laugh and deride. She’s so way out in front of us….ahead of her time, as it were. I’m slowly beginning to recognize the brilliance which is so easily confused with retardation.

  53. Why couldn’t she have used Dr. Seuss as an example. It would have still been funny, and she would’ve been no less an idiot, but at least we’d have to give her a little credit. What I mean is, Dr. Seuss isn’t very elitist. Bringing up Shakes Spear might lose her the Skoal Rebels of her fan base.

  54. [re=620194]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: Being ignorant,that defines what it is to be a “real american,” as opposed to those fake librul commie jews on the coasts. Alls I need to know is here in the Good Book, yee-haw. All them pointy-headed in-tell-eckshels don’t know nothing, with their book-larnin’.

  55. [re=620226]Prommie[/re]: With Sarah and folks like her, too much thinkin leads you away from the LORD.

    Hey did you know that Mark Twain has a new book coming out? He would have LOVED Sarah Palin, doncha think? Something about being thought a fool and removing doubts and opening your mouth.

  56. Next she’ll be flying out to Attu in the Aleutians to campaign against Japanese fishing boats, right? Doesn’t it stab the heart to see the JAPANESE FLAG flying so close to an American WWII battleground????

    She’d probably crap herself if she ever went to Paris and saw a Mercedes…

  57. What could be more elitist that claiming your “words”, by dint of speaking them, should be deemed part of the English language? That is nothing if not exclusitorical.

  58. [re=620147]DustBowlBlues[/re]: I was thinking that as well. Shouldn’t Americans learn English before we start screaming about the immigrants who haven’t?

    And may I also say, this thread is awesome. All the Shakespeare quotes are a nice way to start a Monday morning. Perfectly cromulescent.

  59. I was going to say something along the lines of “All the world’s a Facebook page” but my knowledge of the Bard falls short of the Wonkette standard so I’ll remind you that if Palin is right, future students will be forced to read her works and write thousand word essays on what they mean. Or maybe 140 character essays, being the future and all.

  60. You all (well, most of y’all) make me proud.

    But wasn’t “refudiate” contributed by Al Greene, the taciturn representative of Democrats everywhere?

    Wee wee’d up, though. I had no idea Obama said that. I thought that was something Triggish.

  61. “What is it she does now? Look how she moves her hands.”

    “It is an accustom’d action with her, to seem thus
    moving her hands. I have known her continue in this forty and a’hundred characters.”

    “Yet here’s a twat.”

    “Hark, she tweets. I will blog post what comes from her, to
    satisfy my remembrance the more strongly.”

    “Out, damn’d twat! OUT I SAY!”

  62. irisheyesagain, my husband had Blue Oyster Cult at his place last night and there was a thunderstorm in the outside arena. I was like, “who cares, Sarah is getting her ass kicked!” Don’t bother me with anything but more beer! I never eat at night and I was making nachos at midnight. (bad idea in hindsight)

    Katydid, thanks for the hookup. My faith in humanity is renewed now that I know that “real Americans” still have a sense of humor and can spot bullshit and refudiate it.

  63. “There are more things in heaven and earth, you dumb quitter, than are dreamt of in your philosophy. A lot more. You have no idea. Really.”

  64. this exact trope used to kill me in the bush years: he’d come out and be all smug and teachery about how he and his administration were doing great things in far away places like belarus or uganda or tulsa and we should all just sit back and let the experts handle things and not ask awkward questions of the experts.

    and you’d just KNOW he’d never ever heard of belarus or uganda or tulsa or that shakespeare made up words til five seconds earlier.

    real knowledge takes work.

    rudesby begone. also.

  65. [re=620265]imissopus[/re]:

    Good point with the exception that if we ignore the immigration problem, we will all have to eventually start over by learning to speak Spanish. Refudiar (verb) – to refudiate; Intiendes?

  66. [re=620274]jrd345[/re]: Nope. She didn’t make up a word. That’s what she expects you to believe. She tried using a word that already exists, in a sentence. That is all.

  67. Meanwhile,l the Twitterati weigh in:

    @SarahPalinUSA Please repudiate, refudiate, repoofiate, reloofaiate, or just apologize for, your religious intolerance about 20 hours ago via web
    Keith Olbermann

  68. I’m surprised that $arah hasn’t started her own Amway distributorship. With her “base”, she would be the top producer in record time.

  69. [re=619996]Jar Jar Was a Senator[/re]: Or:

    O most pernicious woman!
    O villain, villain, smiling, damnèd villain!
    My tables—meet it is I set it down
    That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain—
    At least I am sure it may be so in Denmark.


  70. Sarah Palin’s literary role model is much easier to find than Shakespeare. It’s Mrs. Malaprop or, if you prefer novels to plays, Wyn. Jenkins from Humphry Clinker.

    Malapropisms Shakespeare did not do, except in the figures of his fools, like Malvolio and Polonius, who were notable for talking out of their asses, just like Mrs. Malapalin.

  71. Much as I like to quote the more obscure plays to you Liberal Commie Pinko SCUM, this time you don’t have to go any further than Hamlet:

    “O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I . . . .”

  72. This is fun it reminds me of Nooninton speak:
    Twittering For Dummies:
    “My moose, My moose, My kingdom for a moose!”
    Seriously, Miss P gave away Reindeer Hotdogs in a gift basket at some rethug event recently. Discuss.
    Santa Claus Hamburgers
    Christmas Elf Sausages
    She likes to give away nonsensical loony gifts, yet she takes so much nice stuff like hundreds of thousands worth of designer clothes. What a Ho.

  73. I’m sure that Bible Spice will appear on Faux Noise complaining that the evil libruls are elitist scum for pointing out her misuse of the “Gotcha” language, English.
    And hookworms, awhlso.

  74. [re=620295]jrd345[/re]: Yes, Obama speaks in a way that could be described as “ebonics” and not like a Harvard-educated law professor; because he’s black, and all black people speak like that, even when they never do. And someone ranting about “eboncs” then making fun of the way black people are supposed to speak according to stereotypes is in no way racist. Troll.

  75. Well, I don’t think English is living any more. She killed it. I’m going to switch to Latin, anyone want to join me? Bimbo delenda est!

  76. Grim-visaged Shrub’s war hath smoothed his wrinkled balls;
    And now, instead of mounting Laura
    To fright the souls of Limpball’s adversaries,
    He capers nimbly in Condi’s chamber
    To the lascivious pleasing of a good suck.
    -Richard III, 1. 1

  77. Just how many blocks away would appeasiate(Palinese) Shakespalin and the teabaggers? 4 blocks, half mile, not on Manhattan, not in unreal America NYC?

  78. Oh, that Sarah, what a hoot.

    She should leave the public speaking (tweeting) to that well-oiled wordsmith Joe Biden or perhaps the members of this esteemed assemblage (puts the Algonquin round table to shame it does).

  79. [re=620061]mumblyjoe[/re]: She’s not genuinely rural, in any case. Living in Wasilla is urban. Does she raise her own food? Has she ever had dirt on her fingers? I think not.

  80. [re=620191]JMP[/re]: You can be sure her brand of tongues-speakers have no more use for Catholics or most Protestants. State Church, here we come!

  81. OMG. How’d I miss this story. Given the size of her brood, I doth she protest muche. (added an E to much as that is the ye olde Englishe spellinge.)

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