Thrills, Baby, Thrills: Ayn Rand In The 21st Century

by Benjamin Frisch

She uses it to light her cigarettes

Greetings, collectivist parasites! Ayn is back again in our amazing 6th chapter of Ayn Rand Adventures. If this is your first time checking in on Ayn, read from the beginning, or check the archive, where you can catch up before vomiting with your eyes.

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Hola wonkerados.

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V572625694 July 12, 2010 at 11:03 am

Love the cellulite in Sarah’s thighs, and the boob-job stitches

Knightro829 July 12, 2010 at 11:05 am

I immediately had to visit Rand Paul’s wiki page to see if he was actually named after Ayn Rand. Sadly, he was not.

Dashboard_Buddha July 12, 2010 at 11:06 am

Best yet!

Katydid July 12, 2010 at 11:07 am

Bristol’s captions are perfection.

Terry July 12, 2010 at 11:08 am

I think Ben is too kind to Bristol. She’s seems like a chip off the old maternal block, rather than a suffering soul.

BklynIlluminati July 12, 2010 at 11:09 am


weejee July 12, 2010 at 11:10 am

The cartoon equivalent of impaling.

Well done Intern Benjamin.

WarAndG July 12, 2010 at 11:12 am

Dig it. (But not sure the MAMA GRIZ has “dowdy” in her vocab. Too elitist. That would have to be ghost written into her brain by Simon and Shuster or whoever writes the book thingies.)

Bubberella July 12, 2010 at 11:19 am

As I was driving down the by-ways of Virginia last week, I saw a big ol two story Excursion with a sticker in the window asking “who is John Gault”. My first reaction was to smash into him and say “I am, motherfuc#er!” My second thought was for this comic strip. I’m disappointed to know that Rand Paul isn’t named after Ayn.

Radiotherapy July 12, 2010 at 11:19 am

You got one thing right here. Sarah Palin smokes pot!
But only a passing reference to the Palin Hookworm Conjecture — collectivist parasites!?
What do ypu think is infesting that pool?

4tehlulz July 12, 2010 at 11:21 am


user-of-owls July 12, 2010 at 11:22 am

Wasilla. Check
Palins. Check
Parasites. Check

Hmmm. What’s missing?

user-of-owls July 12, 2010 at 11:24 am

[re=615249]Knightro829[/re]: [re=615260]Bubberella[/re]:

Then what the hell is he named after? South African currency? An Excel FUNCTION? Research and Development?

Work in Progress July 12, 2010 at 11:26 am

hahaha! This is the best one yet

ManchuCandidate July 12, 2010 at 11:28 am


KublaKant July 12, 2010 at 11:28 am

I don’t know about the fact that Sarah Palin smokes pot. It is possible that her swimming pool is not infected with hookworms. Regardless of whether it is true that Sarah Palin has hookworms, it is not relevant to her political career. I have heard that swimming pools can become infested with trailer trash. The above ground pools are more likely to be infested, but the in-ground pools with the vinyl liners also have this problem.

SayItWithWookies July 12, 2010 at 11:29 am

I love Sarah’s expression in that last frame — it seems to me that’s what she must’ve looked like the first time she took a Wasilla and then noticed the toilet bowl was filled with hookworm larvae.

BaconTime July 12, 2010 at 11:29 am

The third frame in, with the first dude: I love it.

CrunchyKnee July 12, 2010 at 11:33 am

Is that coke or meth on the table? I’m betting meth.

kudzu July 12, 2010 at 11:35 am

[re=615247]V572625694[/re]: Priceless. I can’t look away no matter how hard I try.

fishskicanoe July 12, 2010 at 11:36 am

While that may not be a good representation of the real Wasilla Hillbilly compound (or maybe it is), it is a great representation of what happened with the little clique of ass-lickers who attached themselves to Ayn Rand back in the ’50s. I’m sure if Aynie could have afforded it she would have taken the boob job and coke mirror path herself but instead had to wallow in the adoration of her followers with their Übermensch delusions.

Great work!

Radiotherapy July 12, 2010 at 11:40 am

[re=615274]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Too bad we don’t see the next frame when the overwhelming stench hits her.

Sleeves July 12, 2010 at 11:44 am

Ayn Rand + muzzle brake yields comedy gold. These days, I more usually need to think of neuro-linguistic programming to laugh out loud.

Q-dos, Mr. Frisch.

Snarkalicious July 12, 2010 at 11:52 am

[re=615265]user-of-owls[/re]: Do you believe in justice? If so, the answer is Malaria.

[re=615278]CrunchyKnee[/re]: Oh, come on. You think they could tell it from baking soda anyhow? I’d just sell the fuckers crushed Ritalin out of pity.

proudgrampa July 12, 2010 at 11:57 am

Maybe someone has already remarked on this, but it’s finally dawned on me that Benjamin’s art is Robert Crumb-esque.

So Benjamin, is it fair to say that Crumb was an inspiration for you?

Well done! The impression of Grizzly Mama is truly horrifying!

Tarangela July 12, 2010 at 12:07 pm

Love the Cruella de Ville eyes that makes you want to hide your babies and puppies!
This Palin bitch would snack on your kids. “Cause hell, it ain’t like they ain’t already been born.
No abortion in that.

freakishlystrong July 12, 2010 at 12:09 pm

Oh the Randanity! Perfection!

Malketeer July 12, 2010 at 12:10 pm


(and bonus kudos for the detail on the CRJ).

proudgrampa July 12, 2010 at 12:16 pm

[re=615287]Sleeves[/re]: Hah! You said “neuro-linguistic programming.” Reminds me of all that other 70s-80s psychobabble nonsense.

“I’m OK. You’re So-so.”

drpangloss July 12, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Plus if we don’t stop abortion who’s children will we feast upon when the end times come if not the poor, Also?

Snarkalicious July 12, 2010 at 12:26 pm

[re=615322]drpangloss[/re]: That’s what we have Africa for, you faithless dog.

The Church of Realism July 12, 2010 at 12:28 pm

HaHa at the cellulite and tit job scar.

Monsieur Grumpe July 12, 2010 at 12:30 pm

Nice, nice, very nice!

MarieDeGournay July 12, 2010 at 12:32 pm

Next Chapter!! Will Rand survive the nighttime Alaska woods, or will the ‘momma grizzlies’ get her?

rmjag July 12, 2010 at 12:40 pm

[re=615258]WarAndG[/re]: yeah , seems ‘ugly bitch’ is more her style …..

facehead July 12, 2010 at 12:48 pm

Impressive, Bravo BF.

Oblios Cap July 12, 2010 at 1:27 pm


Not a good representation. Where’s the fence and the spying neighbor?


If the Palin’s swimming pool is infested with hookworms, imagine what their gene pools like!!!1!! Also.

WriteyWriterton July 12, 2010 at 1:36 pm

Can’t…talk…waves of nausea…too much. Rand + Palin. Critical mass achieved. Head implodes.

facehead July 12, 2010 at 1:37 pm
Ye Olde Fap-Smith July 12, 2010 at 1:40 pm

[re=615258]WarAndG[/re]: Agreed. Palin would’ve called her a “dyke” or “lesbo” instead of Dowdy. Otherwise, this was the best one yet.

Come here a minute July 12, 2010 at 2:20 pm

I’m pretty sure that Randy is the name you call someone whose given name is Randall, unless you’re an Ayn Rand follower. While he may not have been named after her, I bet it didn’t bother the Paul family that people would make that connection.

Neilist July 12, 2010 at 2:30 pm

My favorite personal Ayn Rand story:

Back in the 1970s, at UC Berkeley, there was a men’s restroom in Wheeler Hall (in which the Philosophy and Pol Sci Departments had some offices)that was famous for the “Graffitti Wars” conducted on the walls.

Someone would write something pithy, which would trigger a series of responses and counter-responses, all of which were either very funny, very intelligent, or both.

[It was sort a pre-Net version of Wonkette. Except that the post were funny, intelligent, etc. Oh, no avatars. And rarely any references to buttsek. (It was a different generation.)]

Anyway, I pissed in there daily, just to keep up on the comment threads. One day I finally got up the courage to “post” my own comment. Having spent a drug-fueled weekend reading the thing, I naturally wrote: “Who is John Galt?”

I came back the next day, to piss and to savor the response that my contribution was sure to provoke. There was only one response:

“Oh, no, not you idiots AGAIN.”

I never went back. I got a kidney stone a couple of years later, too. I think the two are connected.

Professor Neilist, PhD
Hugh Akston Endowed Chair of Money & Craphound Literature
Patrick Henry University

Troubledog July 12, 2010 at 2:36 pm

This one is the best of the bunch. But the term Dowdy is reserved for MoDo.

GOPCrusher July 12, 2010 at 2:47 pm

Where’s the fence?

BlueStateLiberal July 12, 2010 at 2:57 pm

Liberal comics guy savages mama-grizzly!

Jindal the Oil Volcano July 12, 2010 at 3:20 pm

That was awesome…best caricature of Tina Fey ever…oh wait, this Palin person is real? AHHHHHH!

pub_option July 12, 2010 at 3:43 pm

I didn’t know that doublewides were available with turrets.

Lionel Hutz Esq. July 12, 2010 at 4:34 pm

Absolutely incredible. I stand in awe.

Rotundo July 12, 2010 at 5:26 pm

The only thing I’d have changed or added to this would be a set of Trucknutz for the ATV, and since it’s flying into Wasilla, maybe the jet, also. The bewb-jawb stitches and dope were laugh out loud funny, think about a hookworm conga line out her backside on one of the next installments.

kygirl July 12, 2010 at 5:40 pm

Rand (Randal) Paul used to go by Randy. His wife didn’t think it was an appropriate name, so she had him start calling himself Rand.

Potater July 12, 2010 at 7:03 pm

Hey, Frisch, you forgot to put a link to this latest comic in your last one.

Veritas78 July 12, 2010 at 7:55 pm

[re=615249]Knightro829[/re]: Your gullibility will be useful here. Keep posting.

Benjamin Frisch July 12, 2010 at 8:11 pm

[re=615306]proudgrampa[/re]: I’m a fan of crumb as much as anyone else. His influence is inescapable these days, but I wouldn’t say I’m an acolyte, I can’t draw big butts so well.

[re=615736]Potater[/re]: Thanks! I fixed it.

dixiecrax July 12, 2010 at 11:26 pm

Does anyone belief George Wallace still walks among us?

I do.

zhubajie July 13, 2010 at 6:55 am

[re=615282]fishskicanoe[/re]: She was definitely into “diet pills” (meth).

Walter White July 13, 2010 at 11:28 am

Harvey Pekar, everyman – RIP

Obamas Left Testicle July 14, 2010 at 4:04 am

The best one so far, in that it did not generate a bunch of idiotic comments proving that the poster doesn’t have a clue what he or she is talking about.

mookworthjwilson July 17, 2010 at 11:43 am

[re=616643]Obamas Left Testicle[/re]: Well it did generate one, at 4:04 am on July 14.

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