![[that one bro taser reference]](http://img.wonkette.com/politics/justice%20thomas.jpg "[that one bro taser reference]")
Supreme Court justice Clarence Thomas’ nephew was allegedly tased and beat up at a New Orleans hospital yesterday after an apparent suicide attempt when he “refused to put on a hospital gown and tried to leave his examination.” Derek Thomas, 25 and a student at Nicholls State University, is epileptic and went into a massive seizure when he was tased. Clarence Thomas and his family are said to be outraged at this terrible incident, though maybe that can’t be true for Clarence, as he usually loves weapons and authority figures using them. Clarence Thomas is said to be flying to New Orleans, to sit there and listen to people talk about the case without interjecting, we assume. [WDSU/ABC 26 via Newell]
TASERS ARE PAINLESS THEY BRING ON MANY CHANGES
July 9, 2010
Security Guards Punch And Tase And Pull Out Dreadlocks of Clarence Thomas’ Nephew
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{ 91 comments }
Wanna hear Clarence explain how they woulda done the same thing to a white boy.
Aside from the sad nature of the event…there is an uncle thomas joke in here somewhere.
But was it a high-tech tasing?
Cop meant to shoot him, but pulled his Taser out by mistake – clear cut case of involuntary life sparing. “Sorry Sir, it won’t happen again”
He will convince himself that this is related to liberals and minorities being out to get him, personally, I’m sure, and add it to his gigantic grudge. It will then allow him to rule against the Constitution another twenty times.
If he can’t convince himself of these things, he has a ready supply of ambitious clerks, like the entire staff of the “torture memo,” who all passed through his wise mentorship, to help him see how this is all a vendetta by liberals.
He’ll blame it on the poor folk of NOLA, even though most of them were “relocated”.
What goes around, comes around, Uncle Tom, I mean Uncle Thomas.
Tasering doesn’t cause seizures, libtards. Brains cause seizures.
Oh Wonkette (Jack) you have made my week. Thanks you for covering the moving story.
[re=614722]V572625694[/re]: Actually, he might be right, if he says they’d have done it to a white boy. The Taser (TM) has meant a license to subdue for police around the country. Oh, wait…. Didn’t the SC get a case about how dangerous it was, and didn’t they refuse to hear it? That’s right, they did!
This was after a prisoner died in his cell from tasing.
There are plenty of examples of big fat moustaches tasing little old ladies and handicapped people. “Being threatened” isn’t the standard for whipping out the Taser (TM): being annoyed is.
“Clarence [Uncle]Thomas Is My Uncle” = “Suicide Attempt.”
Makes sense to me.
YAYSURE!
[Hey, who put this pubic hair in my Coke?]
We’ll shoot if you try to kill yourself again!
[re=614728]Lucidamente[/re]: Nice.
I can just see my favorite skeevy smokin’ doc on the left leaning against the door frame, watching young Thomas twitching on the floor..”Yup, 50,000 volts’ll do that to ya”. You betcha.
“I warned the boy not to have his seizures in public, and for christ’s sake, dreadlocks? He was asking for it!” Thomas probably said before defecating on the graves of civil rights heroes (after asking Scalia for permission, of course).
“Question: Did the seizure leave any lasting scars or permanent damage to the victim? No? What’s the problem, then?”
That’s what I’ll expect from Uncle Tom.
Maybe he was just drunken pubic.
Whatever happened to knocking people out with a baton? Cops are so lazy.
[re=614729]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: I frequently pull my TASER instead of my Glock. Easy mistake to make.
Sure, the grip is completely different; the trigger is different; the weight is wrong; the sight picture is different; and you’re supposed to yell “TASERTASERTASER!” before you hotwire the prep.
But it’s an easy mistake to make.
(Righttttttttttttttttttttttttt.)
[You know, that reminds me of the first time I got a ride in the back seat of an F-4. As we’re rolling down the runway, the driver tells me over the headset, “Oh, one more thing. If I yell ‘EJECTEJECTEJECT!,’ and you say ‘WHAT?!?,’ you’re gonna be talking to yourself.”
Good times. Good times.
Kinda hard on the Gooks, though.
Or BART passengers, I suppose.
[re=614744]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: HA!
But that demonstrates another critical point the conservative Uncle Tom would like to make. The tasing and seizuring were all done under MEDICAL SUPERVISION. Very safe, you’d have to say.
An acquaintance of mine used to carry a taser (who the hell knows why) and once accidentally tazed himself when he was taking his seat in a movie theater. Now every time I see him I have to greet him with “Jared, don’t taze you, bro!”
Hmm, cops in NOLA usually just shoot to kill. They should have doubled-up on the tasing; it might have cured his epilepsy.
Poor kid. *imagines kicking cop in the nuts*
He probably watched the Mike Weinstein video too many times.
Suicide. Add that to the list of things you should not do while being black.
This taser-at-the-slightest-provocation shit has got to stop. The ABC26 story states that the hospital personnel knew Thomas had epilepsy and requested he be tased instead of sedated anyway — that’s just plain barbaric.
Oh, and then there’s this:
The US Supreme Court on Monday ruled in Wilkins v. Gaddy that excessive force claims must be decided based on the nature of the force rather than the extent of the injury. The district court had dismissed a prisoner’s excessive force claim after determining that his injuries were “de minimis.” The Supreme Court found that the lower court had incorrectly applied the standard articulated in Hudson v. McMillian, which held that “the use of excessive physical force against a prisoner may constitute cruel and unusual punishment [even] when the inmate does not suffer serious injury.” The court reversed the decision below and remanded for further proceedings. Justice Clarence Thomas filed a concurring opinion, joined by Justice Antonin Scalia, arguing that Hudson was wrongly decided.
Didn’t happen in New Orleans. Happened in the burbs – Marrero. In Jefferson Parish.
The cops there were once busted for doing target practice with human silhouettes painted brown. Not sure what the medical staff train with.
I feel bad that Thomas’ nephew got tazed. If Thomas were to be tazed, that would would bring me happiness, however.
[re=614736]Geogre[/re]: Hell, a bunch of potentially-Sapphic middle-aged ladies in San Diego had a fund-raiser for a congressional candidate last year, and the cops arrested the hostess, after wrestling her to the ground, for refusing to state her age — in her own fucking house! And the complaint call was from some whack-job neighbor.
The cops’ defense? They wuz scared!
Welcome to Obama’s Health Care System, Libtards!
They probably just tased him in hopes of curing his epilepsy.
I can’t wait until Glen Beck and the rest of FOX News spends all of next week demanding the DOJ prosecute Derek for intimidating that poor NOLA cop.
As long as white people must live in fear, there will be no peace!
Are you saying Clarence Thomas’ relatives haven’t already killed themselves?
[re=614771]Native of SL UT[/re]: If Clarence Thomas were to be tazed, would Scalia’s hand be affected?
[re=614772]V572625694[/re]:
Well, the cops all were dressed like carpets and were afraid they might get munched…
[re=614773]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Well, at least they couldn’t fund his abortion.
I am certain he will not improperly use his office as a justice on the Supreme Court to influence or interfere in an investigation. That would be unethical.
[re=614739]JMP[/re]: oh snap!
[re=614788]Prommie[/re]: Yeah wouldn’t want him to throw his weight around.
You just know that this young Negroid exploited not only the fact that he was Clarence’s fambly but also the fact that he has a brain disorder to gain affirmative-action college acceptance.
Clare-Bear is embarrassed not about the treatment his nephew received at the hands of the po-po, but the preferential shit that went down well before this happened.
Kids, there’s only 4 things you need to know to get through life, and one of them is this: there is no situation on earth so bad that a cop can’t make it worse. The Brits had it right, back when they didn’t even let the cops carry guns.
Please oh please let the younger Thomas sue. Because the reason he can is cos Uncle Tom didn’t get his way.
“In my view, a use of force that causes only insignificant harm to a prisoner may be immoral, it may be tortious, it may be criminal, and it may even be remediable under other provisions of the Federal Constitution, but it is not ‘cruel and unusual punishment.’”
Hudson v. McMillian
If this had happened on “House, MD” they would’ve given him a brain biopsy and CAT-scan at the same time they were hooking him up to a dialysis machine.
I feel bad for the nephew. However, if the same had happened to Uncle Tom…Clarence, I would laugh and laugh and laugh.
Hey orderly! You just tazed a guy who, despite his resemblance to “a black man”, turns out to be an epileptic college student whose uncle is a Supreme Court Justice! What are you going to do now?
(sound of whimpering)
Imagine my embarrasment. Throwing around the phrase ‘Uncle Tom’ while under the coffee-deprived mental state of thinking Justice Thomas’ first name was Thomas. Sheesh. Well at least none of you called me out on the carpet for it.
Ride the lightning, brown person!
[re=614750]Neilist[/re]: If Blazing Saddles taught us anything, it’s that you’ll never take BART alive.
After *all* this time, Clarence has sided with a black man. He was the head of the EEOC and couldn’t give a fuck about all the suffering black people/fucked over people registering complaints but now that its his personal family involved, he takes umbrage. Maybe he’ll have an Ebeneezer Scrooge moment and wake the fuck up, finally.
[re=614772]V572625694[/re]: I’ll say it for the ten millionth time–once again, everything Jello Biafra warned us about on “Last Scream of the Missing Neighbors” has come true.
Normally, I find that depressing. I’ve seen Clarence in action (or inaction?) on the bench, though, so maybe the reason I feel kind of OK is that this event might burrow through the layer of matted pubes and beef-fat residue that cushion the inside of his skull enough for a little personal enlightenment.
[re=614745]AbstinenceOnly Ed[/re]: Uncle Justice Thomas was also overheard muttering something about “uppity niggers” and “socialised Obamacare” as he departed the scene…
re=614768]wilbro[/re]: Perhaps they use rifles with bayonets attached?
[re=614825]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: Erm… on Wonkette, we are not “coffee-deprived.” We are “drunk.” Never forget!
[re=614826]Jim89048[/re]: It’s a good thing I’m the last one in the office. Now nobody will be here to witness me swapping out this desk chair I just pissed on.
Poor kid. New Orleans is one of the worst major American cities in which to have any kind of medical emergency, much less one related to mental health.
[re=614830]Extemporanus[/re]:
Cleon Little: Entertaining and Talent Black Comic Actor.
Clarence Thomas: Entertaing And Negroid Self-Righteous, Hypocritical Clown.
A subtle distinction perhaps. But an important one.
[And TASERs are KEWL! The med students at the UC where I used to work out brought a couple into the TKD Club (I know. I know. "Yuppie Karate") to see if any the "Bad Ass Black Belts" could get past one.
Trust me: You can't. Even as a Hapiko BB -- and we BE Bad.]
So far nobody has stepped forward to say that the suicide attempt was not triggered by Uncle Clarence’s wayward fondlings at family gatherings. Therefore I remain cautiously optimistic.
When I stop laughing at the irony, I’ll mention that I’m very glad this happened to a relative of Long Dong, on many levels. It’s sad it wasn’t Clarence that got roughed up, maybe have his glasses stepped on and get a wedgie for being a liar, a mysogynist, and a mindless shill. Then tased until the ozone got to be too much.. I also hope Thomas’s plane crashes into the Gulf, but I’m not religious and don’t believe in karma so I won’t expect much there… BTW, I do feel bad for the nephew, but my derision for his uncle over-rides any finer instincts I may be capable of exhibiting. I apologize.
What comes around, goes around, bro…
OT, a friend (he passed out ) got robbed by a blind street musician in NOLA. The cops just laughed and laughed, black and white.
[re=614880]Pithaughn[/re]:
He was robbed by a blind street musician
You might say he was …
:: shades :: … robbed blind
YEAAAHHH
[re=614736]Geogre[/re]: Yeah, also examples of cops Tasing children as young as 7, mentally disabled people, bedridden senior citizens – pretty much anyone who looks at a cop cross-eyed. “B-b-b-ut he was resisting!” is the usual cop mantra justifying use of the Taser.
Oh yeah, and I like the “statement” that the hospital put out to explain what their “security” staff did. I guess Tasing the fuck out of someone is still protected by HIPAA, eh?
West Jefferson Medical Center (WJMC) thoroughly investigates all patient care incidents. Any events that may have transpired on July 8, 2010 will be likewise investigated and obviously, prior to the completion of any investigation, the true and accurate facts concerning an alleged event cannot be known.
However, even after any facts are ascertained, it is quite likely that WJMC will not be able to disseminate those facts to the public, including the media, due to applicable laws and regulations which protect patient privacy, unless the patient in question or his/her duly authorized representative grants permission to WJMC to release information.
Translation from hospital-speak:
“Something may or may not have happened on July 8, 2010 to some person, but even if it did, we won’t tell you about it.”
[re=614764]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
Good one there.
Well, anyone want a Guinness with Uncle Clarence?
My friends and I took a vote and it was 5 to 4 in favor of performing a sympathetic tasing of Judge Thomas.
[re=614854]Sara Benincasa[/re]: Except that wasn’t New Orleans, but Jefferson Parish, our worse and racist friends to the east.
[re=614731]Oblios Cap[/re]: Except that it wasn’t in NOLA, but in Jefferson Parish on the Westbank, which wasn’t affected at all by post-K flooding. Nice try though.
Does Wonkette *also* need to spread the lie that this was in New Orleans? It wasn’t. West Jeff is Marerro, on the West Bank of Jefferson Parish, the parish to the east of Orleans Parish (New Orleans). The West Bank is more notorious to non-Louisianians as the place where the cops did not allow refugees flooding from Orleans Parish via the Crescent City Connection (Mississippi River Bridge) to enter. They’re generally a bunch of racist assholes, esp Marerro (though I understand that parts of Gretna are nice).
Wonder why he was in the NOLA metro area at all if he went to Nicholls State (Harvard on the bayou!), which is in Thibodaux, the Lafourche Parish seat, though I’m guessing that West Jeff was closer than Lady of the Lake.
[re=614739]JMP[/re]: Used to be, attempted suicide was a capital crime in England. People were actually hanged for failed suicide attempts, up to the 1860s.
In China, a country not famed for it’s concern for human rights, the ordinary cops have only a billy club (and probably a knowledge of martial arts.)
As some people say, Jim Crow, Sr., is dead, but Jim Crow, Jr., is still alive.
[re=614889]President Beeblebrox[/re]: So it was a rent-a-cop who did this?
The tragedy of Clarence’s fate is that he’s Clarence. Time will not erase the stain. His family will deny him.
Should have tazed the uncle.
Let me guess, he’s rushing down there to pin awards on everyone involved in taking to heart every authoritarian wet dream vote he’s ever made on the court. Right?
And here I thought it was the Democrats that were the proponents of rural electrification.
[re=614729]13ollocks To The Rules[/re]: Definitely the win.
[re=614906]Suce-fleur[/re]: Oh! Then I would not want to go to the hospital there, either.
[re=614772]V572625694[/re]: Exactly right.
A SC highway patrolman weighing about 250 lbs. tased an 80+ year old woman for refusing to sign a speeding ticket, because he felt threatened. His dashboard camera caught it, too.
Roscoe B. Coletrane has been pointing out Thomas’s own hypocrisy, though: he has been the torture guy: “medical supervision” = A-OK and “no organ failure” = “no problem” and “no intention to torture” = “no torture.” He and his boys have defined state abuses so narrowly that, pretty much, even Mengele wouldn’t be guilty.
Why are there so many cases of epileptics being tazed bro? As an epileptic I can say that I have been told seeing one of us flop around like a fish is frightening, but it’s not like we are cracked out rampaging? Seriously, it’s like tazing someone in a coma that’s how out of it we are. Also, it’s very disturbing that at a HOSPITAL a DOCTOR would allow this to happen. And can we stop giving every gorilla with a security badge a fecking tazer gun? How about they just work-out at Gold’s Gym on their off days like the olden times? Pussies, the whole lot of them.
Poor kid, his uncle is a douche.
[re=614907]Suce-fleur[/re]:
That’s the parish where they pulled guns on the NOLA residents that were trying to flee to safety, right?
Thanks for the correction; I is duly chastised.
tasing is just pro-american. clarence should know this.
Has Uncle Clare come out and issued his statement yet? I can hardly wait! Anything he says, and I do mean anything, is going to be hilarious.
[re=614728]Lucidamente[/re]: Oh, excellent.
Luckily I have a living will that says if I ever become a relative of Clarence Thomas DO NOT REVIVE and DO NOT PREVENT MY SUICIDE. Best to plan ahead.
To those of you who think this is going to be some kind of epiphany for old Clarence I just have to say: HA HA HA HA AH HAHAHAH AH HA HA.
This man’s entire popsicle stick and elmer’s glue ego which cradles his fragile self-esteem would not tolerate any kind of mental shift of this sort. He’ll do what every certifiably delusional rightee does and convince himself that “it’s different this time” for some totally hilarious bullshit reason.
“Don’t tase me , doc.”
[re=615030]Hoplight[/re]: Too true, in all the world’s history, there has only ever been on “Ebeneezer Scrooge moment” and it was had by a fictional character in a book.
Cop said, “If he wants to look like the ‘Predator’ from Haiti, he’s going to eat my boot. Now excuse me, I have a Klan meeting in Arizona.”
According to Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, a prisoner who was slammed to a concrete floor and punched and kicked by a guard after asking for a grievance form — “but suffered neither serious nor permanent harm — has no claim that his constitutional rights were violated.”
http://www.killercop.com/Pages/torturedcoverup.htm
http://www.killercop.com/Pages/matz/behavior.htm
[re=614750]Neilist[/re]: I’ll bet the only times you were in the aft seat of a Phantom was to empty the relief tank.
Zhu Bajie
Suce-fleur: He’s probably not even taking classes right now, as it’s the summer. Even Thibodaux General has a behavioral center, I believe.
Poor kid. Nothing like a suicide attempt followed by violent overreactions from your supposed caretakers to make you really lust for life again!
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