also it's like 103 degrees

Who Is Invited To Wonkette’s Weeping Eagle Awards Tonight? YOU

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Also we will MURDER THE SUN.Join a whole bunch of your Wonkette pals at 5:30 this evening for the 2010 Weeping Eagles! Consider this your Invitation, this blog post on the Internet. Eat delicious things! Drink cheap beverages! Win Wonkette T-shirts! Laugh at the buffoonery of your editor and other cretins including morning editor Josh “The Comics Curmudgeon” Fruhlinger, Wonkabout’s Arielle Fleisher, Wonkette videographer Liz Glover, your summer intern/artist Benjamin Frisch and former editors Juli Weiner (according to Facebook, anyway) and Capitol Hill typing monster Jim Newell. We have literally never had so many of us in the same place at the same time, for freedom!

Wonkette is taking over the upstairs lounge at Solly’s Tavern at 1942 11th St. NW at U Street, just a block east of Ben’s Chili Bowl and the U St./Cardozo station. The horror begins at 5:30 p.m. and will probably keep going until 9 o’clock or whenever, with the Awards Ceremony taking place at/around 6:30 p.m. WHO WILL WIN?????

Plus: A literary/political panel discussion with your editors, just like at Politics & Prose or whatever, but with more vulgarity and less substance. And “cocktailized soul food” and the “Whoopie Pies” from Whoops! Bake Shop. Okay that is all you get to know about it, the end. [Weeping Eagles 2010]

About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • pirate king of the Jews

    I am so bummed I’m in the wrong state right now. No “Whoopie Pies” for me :(

  • the problem child

    Unfortunately, I will be taking off all my clothes and slipping into a northern lake at about that time this evening. The other sounds like fun, too, though.

  • harry palmer

    Maybe a migrating weeping eagle will shit on me here in flyover country. Although with my luck, it’ll be a weeping beagle.

  • MarieDeGournay

    Mmmm, Whoopie Pies.

  • JMP

    This makes me wish I was in Washington too. Ah well I will be getting drunk in the editors’ honor (at a preplanned, weekly quizzo game, but still).

  • WarAndG

    I’ll be there in spirits. From North Drunk Wisconsin.

  • charlesdegoal

    Too far. Sorry. Rain check.

  • tencentcomic

    I’m in town, but if you ever saw what I look like–or listened to my non-stop smart-ass remarks, it would ruin the party. Have fun!

  • Radiotherapy

    Where do I send my absentee ballot?

  • freakishlystrong

    Let’s hope the Salahis crash it and gorge on Whoopie Pie!

  • rcdl

    Hopefully the oil spill on U St and 12th will be cleaned up by then. It wasn’t BP this time, it smells more like Crisco.

  • Johnny Zhivago

    Cardozo station? Is this in Mexico?

  • WhatTheHeck

    Do I have to wear shoes? Can I wear a tank-top?
    I know Wonkette has a ‘No clothes, no service’ policy.

  • Ye Olde Fap-Smith

    Man, if my the conditions of my bail didn’t preclude my leaving the state of GA, I’d attend like the dickens. As things stand, I’ll have to get loaded locally. Cheers!

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    I’ll hoist a beer in the eastern direction in salute to our brave Wonkettes. Why don’t you set up a live feed so we can watch (document for possible black mailing purposes) the festivities?

  • proudgrampa

    Sorry, can’t make it. But about that time I will be slipping into a nice, dry martini. Good luck to all.

  • TrailerSpawned

    As as marginally related PSA, I would suggest everyone make the whoopie pies from the official Marshmallow Fluff web site. Double the filling. Thank me later.

  • SayItWithWookies

    I’m seriously thinking about going, although it’s courting death to make the two-hour drive in an un-air-conditioned car. My other plan was to stand in my yard under the sprinkler with a bottle of wine and a glass of chipped ice.

  • Cherry Garcia

    I want to go, but what if I am the only girl there, and all the boys will sit at one table and talk about me – in Spanish – and point and snicker and won’t come sit at my table. That’s it Wonkette, I am canceling your party!
    Jan Brewer

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=612881]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Either one sounds pretty good, actually. If you included a loaded gun int he second option, you could almost run for a Republican seat in the House.

  • weejee

    We tried to send you salmon for C’Addle, but they got pinched by the same TSAer who pinched Bibi’s Glocks. Neilist, Neilist, I knows your out there somewhere you TSA gun nutter!!

  • Vulpes82

    PLEASE TELL ME THERE WILL BE VIDEO!!!!111!! We losers who don’t live in Washington have GOT to see that panel at least. Also, I’m intensely curious to hear what some of you sound like/see what some of you look like.

  • V572625694

    You should probably add a list of winners with the disclaimer “Scheduled to appear” after each name. It’s not hard to see the Weagles growing into an Oscar-like (or maybe WHCA-like) event each year: tuxedos in a fancy hotel ballroom, losers looking elated when their names are not called, weepy acceptance speeches…

    Nah, better to keep it like it is/will be.

  • Doglessliberal

    SOME of you people need to show up. In the event I manage to get away from work early (doubtful) and haul my butt through 102 heat on the Metro, I want a good crowd. Come on, Wonketeers!

  • S.Luggo

    Right. Three and a half hours with a bunch of sots when I could be drinking alone.

    PS: Will there be Furries?

  • Snarkalicious

    [re=612886]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Needz moar pederasty.

  • biscuits

    Say it with Wookies needs to be there. Just saying.

  • Joey Ratz

    Sounds like fun. Maybe I can hitch a ride with Ken as he drives to DC from his Nevada bunker?

  • thefrontpage

    Did someone remember to invite all of the people from Late Night Shots?


  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=612896]Doglessliberal[/re]: It is moments like this that I sort of wish I lived in the OTHER Washington.

  • freakishlystrong

    [re=612892]Vulpes82[/re]: They will be handing out furrie costumes on the red carpet to conceal the wonketts identities.

  • Dingus McHatred

    Could you change the time so that it coincides with my 3:00 o’clock meeting on how we’ll defraud the American taxpayer with the socialism (i.e.budget)? If so, I’ll BE THERE!

  • SlouchingTowardsWasilla

    Are we allowed to go even if we haven’t said anything funny in several months?

  • thefrontpage

    Did someone remember to invite Michelle Malkin and Ann Coulter?

    You know, for the naked jello wrestling.

  • mumblyjoe

    This is the saddest I’ve ever been to live and work in New York. No, really; it’s a pretty rockin’ city, and not a swamp filled with congressional staffers. Not being able to attend the Weagles is literally the worst thing about it, after i-bankers.

    I will, however, be there in spirit. By which I mean, I plan on getting shitfaced at home and yelling at someone about politics.

  • S.Luggo

    [re=612881]SayItWithWookies[/re]: You forgot the DC rush hour traffic, mixed with sound of 2nd Amendment gunfire from just over the Virginia border.

  • SayItWithWookies

    [re=612886]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Hey, I could run as a teabagger — I believe in the Constitution and think we should all learn more history, and am pretty fed up with the Democrats running the country. Hmmm…

  • BlueStateLiberal

    How about a live blog so we can join you in spirt(s)?

  • Jim89048

    This shit better at least be liveblogged. I’m looking at YOU, Riley.

  • GuyClinch

    Okay, I’m going to drag my sweaty ass up there, dagnabbit. Pleeze have a boilermaker waiting for me. (I’ll be the tubby 40-something guy, not that that helps).

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    Sounds like three hoots & a holler but too far away for me. Have fun!

  • rmontcal

    Thom Hartmann is in town. Make sure he gets his invite!

  • Norbert

    Are there any travel scholarships available for delegates from the former Eastern Bloc?

  • Lascauxcaveman

    [re=612915]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Then you probably don’t want to know that I will be taking a running dive off this particular dock about 9pm your time. Temperature is expeted to be in the high 70’s; water temperature a bracing 64 degrees.

    Maybe not as much fun as gulping down expensive liquor in a sweaty, noisy DC attic, but still.

  • weejee

    [re=612994]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Looks suspiciously like Lake Crescent. Water 64°, for what, like the top foot, maybe, before you hit the thermocline?

  • Brendan M.

    [re=612994]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: All I’ve got is a dirty river to swim in….why’d I click on your damn link? Was I hoping for porn? Probably. Well, it was pornography for those without air conditioning, anyway.

  • chascates

    Wait till Newell gets drunk(er) and starts saying how it took 4 or 5 people to replace him!

  • RoscoePColtraine

    To protect my secret identity, I will be wearing my Clark Kent glasses disguise.

    In truth, I shall not be in attendance at all, due to extreme lack of notice, and fear of what you guys are like in person.

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=612864]tencentcomic[/re]: YOu don’t have to tell us who you are. Just say you are sayitwithwookies.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    [re=613119]weejee[/re]: Yes, it is Lake Crescent; specifically at my mom’s house on the north shore. Also correct on the water temp. First thermocline is about a foot down where you lose about 5°, then you hit an INSANELY cold one at about 70 feet, if you’re scuba diving w/o a wetsuit, like we do here.

  • MortSinclair

    Damn! I live in freakin’ Massachusetts! That sucks! (At least for tonight). Heh.

  • AlexisHidell

    Aw shit, I live too damn far away. I would have busted out the old prom dress for an event of this caliber, too…

  • Sharkey

    We need a “this event is officially over” thread but something tells me, not till tomorrow AM.

    Sorry I couldn’t make it, I work a “late shift” and I am also somewhat wary of strangers that I might be intimately involved with… on the net…