Some huckleberry hoax-ster has been sending around spoof emails stating that Senator Patrick Leahy has died of cancer, when he really hasn’t–it was just a little heartburn from the onions in Aunt Mabel’s “famous” Independence Day potato salad. And someone — the VERY SAME HOAXSTER, perhaps? — has been emailing similar announcements about Sen. Dianne Feinstein and Sen. Frank Lautenberg, who also haven’t died. They’re not dead, they’re just boring.
Feinstein reportedly had “not much of a reaction at all” to the spoof, which seems like a missed opportunity for a fun viral video response. Frank Lautenberg — well, he just got over lymphoma and is pretty old, so he gets a pass.
Meanwhile, Leahy told Vermont Public Radio that he’s asking the Capitol Police to investigate the messages, which were made to look like they came from his official email address. “Dilly-dallying around” about this sort of computer technology thing could lead to ANARCHY and also hurt feelings among his peers, who would be sad to find out about their deaths:
The senator said he’s concerned that someone could use similar emails to spread false information about himself or other members of Congress.
“Because if they’re able to hack into my system, they can hack into anybody else’s system. And there are a lot of senators who would be terribly upset to have something like this happen. But I also want to make sure that they’re not sending out things that are making people think I’ve taken this position on an issue or that position on an issue.”
Just imagine: Suddenly the media’s inboxes/telegraph machines are overwhelmed by press releases announcing that “Patrick Leahy Votes Yes on ‘Free Dessert With Every Purchase of a Restaurant Entree’ Act,” “Dianne Feinstein Sponsors Resolution to Enforce Sharia Law,” etc. America would be like Wonkette, come to life. Sounds terrible/fun!
If you think that sort of future is impossible, consider that in their race to win the morning, some news-like outlets have had to retract their Twitter Bulletins about America’s not-dead senators. And they’re really sorry about it, OK? Especially the person behind @USABreakingNews, they are Just One Person and there’s a lot of news out there so come on everybody, it could happen to you. Hey 24-Hour News Cycle, why don’t you SLOW DOWN. [VPR News]
{ 28 comments }
“Dilly-dallying around” = buttsex.
Oh Karl Rove, you are such a merry trickster.
Props for Henrietta Pussycat. Thanks.
Dear Lauri, please note that you have quoted Henrietta Pussycat but have used a photo of Daniel Striped-Tiger. Where, where have the journalism standards gone?!?
It should be pointed out that spoofing an email header isn’t really “hacking”, by any real stretch of the imagination. The New York Times article, being reasonable for once here, actually clarifies that also. We had a bunch of douchebags do this to our all-campus mailing lists in college, it’s not actually terribly difficult or interesting, really, and it gets old before you’ve even done it, but apparently nobody in government or traditional media understands how email works, big surprise, so now there’s a news article about it.
This is a miracle, proof that Space Jesus (well just Jehovah for Feinstein and Lautenberg) loves the ancient Democrats so much that He will bring them back from the dead, so that Financial Reform can finally pass.
We should be hoaxing more about Supreme Court justice deaths instead.
The senator said he’s concerned that someone could use similar emails to spread false information about himself or other members of Congress.
Yeah, that would be a shame. Has Leahy not heard of Facebook, the Twittahs, or Faux News?
The fact that Leahy framed this as a ‘hack’ = -5000 points at life. But I would imagine this is something Rove would do late at night with a can of Jolt Cola and a bowl of Cheetos in his undies….sans napkin.
[re=612828]ragecupcake[/re]: Those standards? They’re hiding in Lady Elaine Fairchild’s Newseum.
It’s so haaaaard beating the scoop.
You know, corroboration might be worth something. Intelligence might help. If you’re the Twitster, you might consider using the telephone. If you’re the telephonist, you might check the website. If you’re the webster, you might open a book. These remote and exotic skills can be taught.
In fact, they should enroll in my seminar: “How to be a human gathering information” today.
[re=612838]freakishlystrong[/re]: Their facebook status updates:
Patrick Leahey is not dead yet. I’m getting better.
Frank Lautenberg is only mostly dead.
[re=612834]JMP[/re]: Ah, the Bickerstaffe ploy.
“They may indeed be alive now, but I said that they died. Obviously, these are zombies.”
[re=612848]Geogre[/re]: I just lold for real. Your seminar wins the comments.
Don’t ever turn your back on Daniel, he’s one bloodthirsty motherfucker.
Obviously that hoaxster came to a plausible, though wrong, conclusion while watching the Senate on CSPAN. Who hasn’t?
Apparently, the Weekly World News is still viable.
Dylan predicted Sharia Law 45 years ago when he said that everybody must get stoned.
Hack=typing stuff. I’ll hack Wonkette right freakin’ now. Rush Limbaugh died of anal fissures today.
This is why Frank Lautenberg hasn’t relinquished his pager — it doesn’t lie to him like his email does. Okay, it hasn’t gone off in years, but still.
You mean it’s not true? Damnit, what do I do with this giant jello mold that I made for the wake?
What a waste of mini-marshmallows.
[re=612830]mumblyjoe[/re]: Really! Don’t those old Senators realize that any terrorist can walk right into a Home Depot and buy exactly the same size tubes they use to build the internet. Does that sound like security?
“Feinstein reportedly had “not much of a reaction at all”
Further proof that she IS dead.
Dilly-dallying? Is this like dithering?
I would suggest Sharron Angle as a possible suspect, except for the fact that the people did not die from gun shot wounds.
That’s what they get for relying on Mr. McFeely to deliver their email.
This never would have happened under a Howdy Doody Administration; Mr. Rogers was soft on cybersecurity! Washington needs Chief Thunder-thud!
But Abe Vigoda’s ok, right? Right??
[re=613376]user-of-owls[/re]: The answer to that age-old question is only a click away.
Comments on this entry are closed.