Just last week your Wonkette shared a new ad by Arizona Grandpa John McCain against the infomercial con artist J.D. Hayworth, who wants to steal McCain’s frayed ol’ Senate seat plus replace your hard-earned dollars with fantasy “free government money.” Walnuts has released another new ad, and it’s almost exactly like last week’s except better in every possible way imaginable, and therefore destined to sweep him to victory with a triple-digit lead (at minimum!).
In this new iteration of “J.D. Hayworth Is a Big Fat Huckster,” McCain creates a video montage with references to everything he’s ever learned from watching TV — which he always does at 2 a.m., alone in the dark, crying into a bowl of Metamucil Flakes. There’s the ShamWow guy, and World War II footage straight from McCain’s personal home movie collection, and even a reference to “horse love repellent” to titillate the olds. Not to mention ample use of the original 16-millimeter footage of Hayworth hawking the Free $$’s 4 U, with the words “buyer beware” repeated over and over so you don’t forget it, BUYER BEWARE.
Also featured prominently is government grant-guy Matthew Lesko wearing his trademark “$ suit,” doing his thing. Hmm, did desperate old fraud McCain pay “free money” to Lesko for all the footage he used from Lesko’s commercials? Because it kind of seems like McCain’s campaign made an entire commercial against nutty Hayworth based on actual footage from Lesko’s “FREE MONEY” ads, doesn’t it? And doesn’t John McCain’s campaign have a history of constantly stealing copyrighted material, like Jackson Browne songs or whatever?
{ 49 comments }
Caveat Teleprom-emptor.
Good god…does that have the salty-sour stench of desperation or what?
What? No Fred Thompson reverse-mortgage scam?
McCain is desperate; it’s like he’s fallen, and he can’t get up. The ad, though, is priceless; but can be yours for just $19.95 if you call within the next five minutes.
This is what happens when you rummage around in Cindy McCain’s purse for some TicTacs and don’t look closely enough at the bottle.
[re=609929]JMP[/re]: But if he can clap the lights will go off, so what’s the problem?
[re=609929]JMP[/re]: This is 100% true, but does not change the fact that Hayworth is a certified nutjob. Of course, this directly appeals to the East-Valley crowd down on the plains of Hell, so get ready for John Kyl to be the most sane Senator from AZ!
i thought walnuts was against gay marriage too? or did cindy and meghan browbeat him into flipping on that too?
Who is the D that either of these assclowns will be running against? I realize this is Arizona, but you’d think that even as old and obtuse as this electorate is, they’d realize the lose/lose contest that this has become. Heeeennnhhgg?
McCain just looking for a pity fuck, as usual.
AZ will give him one more toss in the hay I suspect.
[re=609931]Tcaalaw[/re]: Speaking of Cindy, John just bought her a genuine faux diamond ring made of pure 1-karat gold.
[re=609935]Gun-toting Progressive[/re]: Like in Kentucky and Nevada, though, nominating Hayworth would give the Dems a great opening to try and take the seat. Oh, teabaggers, please nominate more unelectable nuts.
There is a Lesko clip, but there is a Lesko impersonator in a blue question mark suit. Now, that’s obviously a potential suit as restraint and libel and all that stuff, I guess, but such a lawsuit would be hilarious, because it would be Lesko suing saying that his credibility was ruined by being associated with Hayworth.
Anyway, the ad is fantastic. The clips are short enough to probably skirt law, and the hits are pretty strong, and, most interestingly, they’re finally not trying to go to the stupid right of Hayworth. That is almost hopeful.
Taking Haworth to task for grifting, simultaneous to taking the endorsement of Palin.
Funny.
That was some pro Blingee there! I found myself humming “Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran…” at the end of it.
McCain is lame, but this is kinda funny — to me. However I am not the average Arizona GOPer who set a nationalstandard for baneful cretinism. Don’t they want their elected officials spending most of their time in Kenya looking for Obama’s birth certificate?
That was actually pretty entertaining — unfortunately half the people who see it are going to think it’s a pro-Hayworth ad. I mean, it’s got Sister Cleo in it, so the teabaggers are going to think their favorite telephone psychic actually endorsed him. Not that that’s too far off the mark, but damn — McCain already knows that Hayworth’s supporters are too stupid to understand satire, right?
finish the dang primary.
Sadly I think the take-away message to many of his constituents is “I gotta get me somma that spray”
After watching that clip, I feel like I’ve been doing shots at the Star Wars Bar for a couple of hours. Desperately need shower too. How do these fucks sleep at night in their own skin? Dueling Fuckwads!
Tumblin’, bumblin’ old John roliin’ into the gutter to keep his job. And here we thought that his last problem was little miss Sarah Snowbillie.
The ad was doing well right up until the “Character Matters” at the end, when McCain reminds us that he checked his at the door long, long ago.
So “Friends of John McCain” just sounds like a 501 (c)(3) but it is actually part of the official campaign? That’s an interesting twist.
Anyway – great ad!
Fair (free) use.
[re=609942]JMP[/re]: Wishful thinking. Have you been perusing the news from my lovely state recently? I don’t think there are enough people in Tucson to pull off the upset.
[re=609921]user-of-owls[/re]: Liar beware?
But we are talking about politicians here, turning lies into entertainment for the unwashed.
Mmm… Mavericky. And reminding Republican primary voters that your opponent is to the far right on gay marriage works every time, right?
This from someone who is against drug use. The world is fascinating in its contradictions.
Hey, Walnuts, horse off.
[re=609963]Gun-toting Progressive[/re]: That reminds me; one of the big supporters of the Arizona racism is Ray Stevens, whose greatest hits were another mainstay of mid-afternoon UHF advertisements when I was a kid; the only music ads I remember for an individual, otherwise it was all the Time-Life collections.
“Is that Freedom Rock? Well, turn it up, man!”
Okay, hold on, I’m a little confused. So is that legal for McCain to buy an ad that starts with the disclaimer that it was paid for by Hayworth?
dick joke, truck nutz, also (/naughty humor)
Why would we want a copy of J.D.’s dumbest congressman award??? He earned that fair and square!!!
CHECK OUT MY NUTS!!!!
And when “Dumbest Congressman” J.D. Hayworth pulls off the upset and wins the Republican primary, we’ll have the wonderful spectacle of “Character Matters” John McCain endorsing him.
McCain has been getting “free government money” almost his whole life. OK, there was that time he was getting “free North Vietnamese government money” which turns out to be made of fists. And now J.D. wants some of that “free government money” of his own, even though he dodged Vietnam by being 10 years old at the time. A real patriot would have found a way to see some combat instead of just talking on the teevee even though POW McCain only had a North Vietnamese teevee, which is also made of fists.
Why doesn’t he just use his SNL appearance hawking failed Walnuts for Prez stuff?
Oh, right.
Do I hear unanimous consent? All those in favor of letter the southern dumbfucks secede say Aye.
Aye.
Am I the only one who sort of liked this ad? Lets be real, its either shitty old Walnuts or younger and completely fucking nuts Hayworth. I’ll take 6 more years of Henghing.
[re=610152]Ted Kennedy Breakdancing[/re]: I’m not trying to be Mr. Mary Sunshine optimist here, but if J.D. wins the primary there is a chance that he’s even too batshit for the general electorate of AZ and the Dem could win…
[re=610163]mookworthjwilson[/re]: Well here are your candidates: “investigative journalist John Dougherty, Scottsdale attorney Randy Parraz and Arizona State University administrator Cathy Eden”
Nope, the Dems are truly horrible fucked here. JD Hayworth will just rant about the browns and that will be that.
[re=610152]Ted Kennedy Breakdancing[/re]: Yeah, i have to props to Walnutz’s ad team. But it needed a Bedazzled reference to complete the informercial circle of life.
[re=609958]ZombieRichardFeynman[/re]: oh snap!
As disgusting as Hayworth is I really really want to see McCain lose big-time,
[re=610190]Ted Kennedy Breakdancing[/re]: I forgot, the Dems are blowing their load trying to take the Governor’s mansion back from the queen of the brown-haters.
[re=610190]Ted Kennedy Breakdancing[/re]: Obama did make a big mistake picking Napolitano (sp?) for Homeland Security instead of getting her to run for the Senate.
Dangit, I knew it was a bad idea to vote for KILLASAURUS.
Does it mean I’m special if I have no fkn clue what is going on in that ad?
[re=609929]JMP[/re]: and it comes with a life alert, which mccain himself uses.
This commercial is fucking golden.
Using copyrighted material for the purposes of parody is often protected by law. But official political parody?
[re=610087]BobTheBuilder[/re]: JD Hayworth will NEVER win the primary! Yes, we know he is stupid, yes we know he is corrupt, yes we know he is the ultimate hypocrite, yes, we even know he is corrupt…We also know that he creates a very scary vulnerability in Congress. JD basically handed democrat Mitchell his seat in the House when he decided that unethical acts were a part of his life he thought he could hide.
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