If you want evidence of how far America has fallen, just remember our dear old friend Manuel Noriega, who we were forced to arrest, for appearance’s sake, back in 1989. Just to prove that there were no hard feelings, we called him a prisoner of war and let him have a super-posh prison suite, with private exercise machines and everything. But once his term was up, we handed him over to the French, who convicted him years ago in absentia on money-laundering charges, and who are treating him exactly like they treat every tourist arriving from America (i.e., with contempt).
Noriega’s new Frenchy cell is only 7 by 10 feet, and his lawyers claim that it is “at the limits of human dignity.” The French don’t consider Noriega a prisoner of war (apparently it’s only “war” for the French if it involves four solid years of fighting in trenches); they are also not buying his argument that he is immune from prosecution as a former head of state. Looks like it’s a bad week for sovereign immunity! Guess Noriega shouldn’t have bothered with those puppet presidents while he ran the show as “maximum leader,” eh?
Anyway, Noriega is not taking this lying down, announcing that he is the victim of a conspiracy, defiantly emitting sentences like “I say with much humility and respect that this is an imaginary banking scheme” and “I set about fighting against drug trafficking with much zeal and was warmly praised by the United States, from Interpol.”
Noriega’s lawyers also pointed out, inconveniently, that he was named a Commander of the Légion d’Honneur, which is France’s greatest honor. But whatever, Jerry Lewis has one of those and he’s history’s greatest monster. [BBC/AP]
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Nobody noticed, but at the time, Mr Noriega was the potentate for a sovereign nation, and, on the word of one of Hemingway’s exes (able to report during the blackout because she had a British passport, she said), we are to believe the US killed over five thousand humans in the attempt at offsetting any notion the Panamaniacs might have of hording their quarry. He was, after all, a drug dealer, at that time, I suppose, the only one on earth.
Josh, that “Jerry Lewis Connection” is a nice touch.
Rather than bombarding the Papal Legate’s house with rock music in an attempt to force The Maximum Leader to flee his refuge, the US Army should have projected Jerry Lewis “films” on a widescreen.
Or perhaps not. The PTSD of our troops would have been crippling. And “Cinderfella” is classed as a Weapon of Mass Destruction under internationally law.
Huh; I knew it was important for the US to have a puppet in charge of Panama for canal turnover; I mean, to stop the flow of illegal drugs into the US from non-CIA-approved sources; but had no idea the French had reason to care.
I’m a little disappointed that the alt-text was not Van Halen inspired.
Le juge français a répondu “Ribbit”
Sacrebleu!
You know who else put Pineapple Face under de facto house arrest? And this even though he was not an underaged altar boy.
In that artist’s fabulous rendition, Noriega looks alot like Dustin Hoffman at the end of Little Big Man.
http://thepioneerwoman.com/homeschooling/files/2010/01/littlebigman.jpg
This still pales in comparison to the indignities suffered by Dave Weigel, about whom I have not had an update in nearly 4 hours.
[re=608476]user-of-owls[/re]: Unfortunately for Manuel, Steve McQueen is no longer around to help him escape from Ile du Diable.
So he sold drugs and did dirty work for the French too, not just the CIA? I guess they’re trying him for conflict of interest then. I’m holding out hope that this trial will bring out some dirt on GHW Bush, Noriega’s former boss, because I felt robbed by the last one.
I wonder why Noriega still hasn’t written a book?
That would be his only possible revenge, but I gather that his minimum punishment in the U.S. was a way of forestalling that. That said, it was extra-territorial, sovereign immunity, and, of course, pretty much a way to create an environment for Bushie to undo Carter actually (gasp!) honoring the Panama Canal Treaty.
“If Panama is unable to defend the canal, we can ignore the treaty? Well, they won’t be able to after we’re done with them.”
it’s only “war” for the french if they’re fleeing from the germans.
Noriega used his time in stir to learn new things. Like the syntax and grammar of Wonkette–for example “, from Interpol” in his statement.
[re=608458]JMP[/re]: I thought the Van Halen song was about getting into bed with some girl only to find out that her vagina-hole was too big, i.e. sticking one’s meat-rod into the panama canal is unpleasant.
“I set about fighting against drug trafficking with much zeal and was warmly praised by the United States, from Interpol.”
Ya wanna keep that to yerself Manuel? Those cheese-eating-surrender-monkeys are still mad at us for saving their derrieres back in dubya-dubya-two.
At least we didn’t have him hanged, like we did to Saddam. We’ve gotten
much tougher on our wholly-owned despots since Reagan’s time.
[re=608478]Baldar T Flagass[/re]: I thought about that too, the poor bastard.
It’s only “war” for the French if it concludes with their surrender and utter collapse. Therefore the French judiciary will sign documents of surrender and hand them over to Noriega, at which point he will be flung into his 7×10 cell and forced to watch every Jerry Lewis movie ever made while being made to eat French Fries drowned in mayonnaise.
I was so disappointed back when Noriega was brought to the U.S. that he didn’t start sharing all his secrets. Felt the same way about Saddam. You keep hoping that these guys will take their shot while they have the chance but then they just push-on, seemingly convinced that they’ll find a way out.
[re=608482]Geogre[/re]:
it was extra-territorial, sovereign immunity
Still, they didn’t hang him with a knot of people surrounding him shouting “Muqtada! Muqtada!”
[re=608494]Hedley Lamar[/re]: [re=608504]user-of-owls[/re]: Oh Camp Cropper, slow fingers.
Heads of State will roll. Except not W.
Will Ollie North appear as a character witness for le pruneau, Noriega?
Why won’t the 80s just die already? First Transformers and now this?
noreiga, drug trafficking, the cia and international police agencies. man, the 80s – back when a president really knew how to run a sleazy shadow government!
[re=608493]just pixels[/re]: Damn, you beat me to the “cheese-eating surrender-monkeys” crack!
Aujourd’hui is the day the clown cried.
What is ACORN up to now? Watch the video at http://www.ACUACORNAction.org to find out what ACORN has become. Track former leaders to ensure that we know when ACORN attempts to create new groups using fake names to continue their work.
[re=608572]KGalatro[/re]: What is KGalatro up to now? Watch the comments section to find out what this teabagging, puppy-fucking, blog-whoring wingnut has become. Banhammer him so we no longer have to see his pathetic fake names as he continues his unholy work.
Noriega could have avoided all of this if he had set his drug smuggling to automatic instead of Manuel.
[re=608589]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: I say just ignore it and it will go away. Let it waste its time commenting here where most of us participate in “critical thinking” and have a functioning bullshit filter. Wonkette is just a time and money sink for there paid troll losers.
[re=608572]KGalatro[/re]: WTF?
Back on and off topic: The French are just grumpy because their soccer team is an international laugh line.
“Noriega is not taking this lying down”
Why not? Seven by ten feet is plenty of room for him to lie down in any direction he wants!
[re=608617]Real DC Native[/re]: Besides, I get all the news I need direct from Bertha Lewis. No need for fake names.
[re=608572]KGalatro[/re]: Ah, you’re hawking this nonsense here, too. I believe my suspicions were right, then; you are the bastard child of spambot and a wignut troll.
[re=608502]Ruhe[/re]: I think the real reason that they don’t start singing is that they’ve had the U.S. blowing in their ear for so long, to do their bidding, that when they get arrested they’re in a state of denial.
[re=608572]KGalatro[/re]: How’s that taking America back thingy working out for you? And also.
[re=608617]Real DC Native[/re]: I know. Just wanted to make myself laugh (and maybe a couple of the Wonkettes, too.)
[re=608459]weejee[/re]: Victoire!
[re=608572]KGalatro[/re]: Asshole much?
The former strongman … stumbled recalling his date of birth during the first day of the trial on Monday, the BBC’s Christian Fraser reports from Paris.
When asked about the discrepancies, first he said 1936, then corrected himself to state he had been born in 1934.
In other words, what the French want is for him to show his birth certificate.
Anyway, a 2m by 3m cell sounds like a typical Paris apartment, so I don’t see what Noriega is complaining about.
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