totally negates scott brown

Barbara Bush’s Genetic Makeup Fails To Make Her Hate Health Care for Poors

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Barbara Bush the Younger was on Fox News Sunday on Fox News Sunday to talk about some new scheme to “bring health equity to the U.S. and Africa,” and shocked Chris Wallace by admitting that she was not against our Socialissimo forcing patriots to have something that pays to fix their hearts after the fried meat gets stuck in the tubes. Could she hate Reagan and the Troops more?

“Why do, basically, people with money have good health care and why do people who live on lower salaries not have good health care?” she asked. The answer, basically, is capitalism is sublime and kick-ass in equal parts, but you can’t understand that sort of thing if you have librarianista socialism muddying your blood lines.

So here we have this health care thing Barbara Bush’s dad heard about and probably disliked, and yet she’s not in perfect agreement. Or maybe Barbara Jr. is just taking an opportunity to go on a year-long booze cruise celebrating the fact that half of her “equity in health care” plan is already in place. [Huffington Post]

About the author

Jack Stuef is your loyal editor and a freelance satirist or something like that. He is a contributing writer for The Onion. E-mail him or whatever.

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  • 102415

    No fair that is my stupid sister! I’m the smart cute one.

  • chascates

    Welcome, Jack Stuef, is indeed that is your name.

  • ManchuCandidate

    I’m starting to understand why the Bush twins drank when Daddy W was in the WH.

    A semi likable Bush? WTF?!?

  • JMP

    Hey, the new guys’ post is back! Maybe trying to comment won’t take me to an error page this time.

    Anyway, with a Bush actually showing compassion for people who don’t have vast sums of inherited wealth, Barbara’s family must be really disappointed in her.

    And she’s still hot.

  • Prommie

    Rich wives, this is what they do, they sit on charity boards, while husband rapes the planet and exploits workers. Traditionally, the hospital or rehab clinic then gets named for wife, putting veneer of philanthropic respectability on family of criminals. This is the wife’s job. No credit is due them, none, this is what is expected of them, what they were trained to do.

  • Baby who ate the Dingo

    I like bush. Bueno arbusto in su pantalones, Fidel.

  • Terry

    So, Barbara…you and your sister both have come out publically with views that were counter to your fathers. Actually, your mother has tiptoed along that line, too. Where were you all for a certain 8 years. Did you tell the old man any of this sort of thing?

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    When will she apologize to Rush Limbaugh?

  • WadISay

    This almost offsets Barbara Bush Senior, who thinks the Poors should be grateful that they can sell their organs for money.

  • Allyson

    “Or maybe Barbara Jr. is just taking an opportunity to go on a year-long booze cruise”
    Hey, red wine is part of a healthy diet…and a healthy perspective on the issues, as well…

  • SayItWithWookies

    Once again the rest of the world fails to live up to Dubya’s high standards. All he wants is for everyone to follow the teachings of his favorite philosopher, Jesus, who encouraged everyone to think from the gut, do what benefits the shareholders, and watch this drive. Was that so much to ask?

  • JMP

    [re=598020]Prommie[/re]: Except that Barbara is an heiress, and no one’s wife right now. And the rich wife she was named after, at least, has nothing but contempt for the poor.

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    Where did she get a case of empathy? Genetics is just a crap shoot or maybe Barbara the Oldes fooled around.

  • Ted Kennedy Breakdancing

    Jack Stuef? Is that a prank name? Anyhow welcome, good job of making fun of some drunk whore.

  • actor212

    They say booze kills brain cells, and apparently, here is Exhibit A, according to the right wingers.

    Well, at least those who aren’t wanking to that photo of girl on girl action.

  • JMP

    [re=598034]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Considering W, I’d think maybe Laura did, except that Jenna has George’s looks and apparently his lack of intelligence. However it is possible, although rare, to have twins with two different fathers.

  • Troubledog

    I think she can say what she wants. The options on the Haliburton shares in her trust fund from Uncle Dick must be vested by now.

  • Prommie

    [re=598032]JMP[/re]: She’s a rich wife in training. If you love her so much, why don’t you marry her?

    And she’s got a little rat-weasel face, too, ugly skank.

  • the problem child

    [re=597987]chascates[/re]: [re=598036]Ted Kennedy Breakdancing[/re]: Somebody needs to update his on-line resumé to reflect the glory that is being a wonkette contributor:

  • Scarab

    So it appears that Laura Bush was screwing the mailman.

  • comicbookguy

    Meh, give her some time. A few years in developing nations, a few years with a Republican billionaire, and she’ll come to the conclusion that teh poors’ lack of health care is working out quite well for them.

  • Roach

    I think her face is too round and flat. Not rat-weasel but more like pit-bull.

    Beady little eyes.

  • JMP

    [re=598042]Prommie[/re]: Hm; one the one hand, she’s hot, appears to be more intelligent and nicer than the rest of her family, and rich. On the other, having to deal with the in-laws would be a nightmare.

  • gurukalehuru

    This is a beginning. I expect many Reptilian Americans in the near future will be saying “I never said I was AGAINST health care, I just don’t like the way they rammed it down our throats” the same way they all like the 1964 Civil Rights Act…well, parts of it.

  • Scaggsville guy

    [re=598028]SayItWithWookies[/re]: All he wants is for everyone to follow the teachings of his favorite philosopher, Jesus, who encouraged everyone to think from the gut, do what benefits the shareholders, and watch this drive.

    Yeah except Duhbya didn’t do what Jeebus said about the shareholders. Every time Duhbya started another “oil company,” the shareholders (i.e. friends of his parents looking to buy influence) lost every penny they invested.

    But they were fine with it because it’s what they expected, so it was a win-win, especially for Duhbya, who got rich.

  • ALIVE!

    This is good news for John McCain.

  • Oblios Cap

    She’s merely an example of deviation from the mean; the rest of the family are such evil fucks that the child was born with some semblance of humanity.

  • Holding Out for a Hero

    I always thought that she was the smart one which isn’t saying much.

  • Autoo

    [re=598055]JMP[/re]: I’m going to give Babs Jr. the benefit of a doubt (I tend to do that with the cute ones who make the right noises). Maybe she’s just one of those college edjumacated kids that hung out with the cool liberal gang in school, read some lefty blogs online and saw the clear, uncluttered path to rejecting her parents’ hypocritical, bourgeoise jive.

    Not the first time that’s happened.

  • dr.giraud

    [re=598055]JMP[/re]: I don’t know, the “in-laws” would probably tolerate/ignore you if you (1) kept your mouth shut all the time, nodding whenever an Elder Bush spoke and (2) smiled in the proper reserved way for the annual family portrait at Kennebunkport kompound.

  • S.Luggo


    What comes next, Miss Stalin? Free public education?

    And to think, I almost voted for her father “Beans”.

  • Cape Clod

    Betcha she marries a rich doctor and we never hear another peep out of her about socialized medicine.

  • comicbookguy

    [re=598055]JMP[/re]: I think dealing with the in-laws would be a hoot. Wear your t-shirt and say things like, “C’mon Dubya, one little tequila shot. Just to break the ice.”

  • Oldskool

    She’s practically a galldanged community organizer. Burn her at the stake!

  • Darkness

    Whose the Chinese blond girl on top in the pic?

  • JoeCool BigPecker

    you people sound kind of pathetic taking this loser pissant so seriously. I

  • JoeCool BigPecker

    mean damn, seriously.

  • EvlUnclBud

    She figures if she’ll get help for smoking and booze someday, so should the poor. If that’s compassion, I’ll take it anyway.

  • Katydid

    Jack Suef? Jack Suef? Who are yew? Tell me, who the fuck are yew, yew, yew, yewwwww?

  • Katydid

    Today we are all rat-faced skank heiresses who are repudiating their war criminal daddies for attention.

  • TGY

    Socialissimo? Eeexcellent.

  • bago

    [re=598057]gurukalehuru[/re]: The Big Black Parts. Right down our throats.

  • KidCrucial

    I for one welcome this new and improved nazi socialized commie-loving maoist that is Barbara Bush Jr.

  • Hooray For Anything

    There were always rumors/hints that the rest of W’s clan were not quite on board with W’s W-ness. That Laura the Wife was a secret liberal/commie and that it filtered down to the daughters. Or at least that’s what Globe Magazine told me while I read it in line at Safeway. And we all know what Globe Magazine says is true.

    It could explain Laura’s perpetually valium-induced stare and the Bush twins penchant for drinking

  • JMP

    [re=598078]Autoo[/re]: It seems to be the same way with Meghan McCain, whose actual policies seem pretty liberal, even as she sticks to daddy’s party; except Megs doesn’t seem all that bright.

    [re=598091]comicbookguy[/re]: I like this idea. I could also offer him pretzels.

  • stew

    Yeah, that’s Jenna doing the drunk/lesbo-wrestling/ciggarette-holding thing. Not Jenna has apparently turned from her wicked ways.

  • Jukesgrrl

    She’s been to Anacostia and she’s been to third-world countries. She hasn’t drunk enough not to notice similarities. It IS possible for rich kids to grow a conscience (e.g. Jay Rockefeller). She ain’t there yet, so I’m not pinning a medal on her for one interview.

  • Serolf Divad

    [re=598020]Prommie[/re]: Damn… nice call, but… damn

  • Pragmatist

    Barbara Bush is the real thing.
    Damn. i hate to say that.

  • Abou Diaby

    She’s too young to know that helping the poors with healthcare is bad, since it gives them no incentive to better themselves. Give her a few years until she outgrows her liberal childishness.

  • lochnessmonster

    She knows her Grandpa & Grandma are looking forward to their $250.00 checks to off-set their donut holes.

  • steverino247

    [re=598020]Prommie[/re]: You nailed it. Others, you can just look around your city for the names if you don’t believe it.

  • Mr Blifil

    When a Bush gets a taste for bush, is the time/space continuum affected?

  • free1

    [re=598437]Mr Blifil[/re]:
    Fur, once traded, shall remain forever traded.

  • sezme

    Needs moar alt-text and a punchier finish, still nice work with the librarianista socialism. However [re=598020]Prommie[/re] wins this round.

  • Stalkin&#39

    I’m on board with this health care equity with Africa thing, why can’t the poor Rwandans get access to my pricey, spotty coverage instead of their $2/yr universa… –HEY, WTF!!!!