The most honest and beloved businessman in America is of course the noble auto dealer. Anyone who’s ever bought a new car can remember only good things about the experience! And dealerships have elaborate legal protections in every state that insulate them from competition and restrict the rights of manufacturers to control their own sales channel — GM had to pay $1 billion dollars to various dealers to shut down Oldsmobile, for instance — which makes them paragons of the capitalistic free market. But what happens when one of these heroes is shut down by Josef “Obama” Stalin? He gets even, that’s what!
Jim Renacci was just a simple, ordinary American entrepreneur who bought a GM dealership in 2007 from a guy who was about to go to prison for laundering drug money. In those heady go-go times, GM seemed like a world-beating company to hitch one’s star to; thus, it came as a total shock a couple of years later when the commissars assigned to run GM for the good of the proletariat came down hard the kulak Renacci, shutting his precious dealership down. That’s why Renacci wants to be northeast Ohio’s new Congressman, to undo these sorts of terrible injustices.
The current congressman, Democrat John Boccieri, only won the seat in 2008 after the previous Republican Representative-for-almost-life quit, and he voted for the dreaded Health Care Bill that will benefit thousands of his constituents, so he may be in a bit of trouble this year. This is probably why he’s being so mean and pointing out all the lawsuits Renacci is faced with over shitty cars he sold to people! Renacci also accepted money from the Trotsky-inspired Cash for Clunkers program, but he swears that he was actually opposed to it and that sweet, sweet government cash was physically shoved into his hands.
Luckily for Renacci, the financial overhaul bill won’t regulate auto dealers, so once Speaker of the House Boehner personally gives him his dealership back, he’ll be able to create bundles of Chevy Malibu-backed collateralized debt obligations or whatever.
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If Jim Renacci can do for the Congress what Bud Selig did for Major League Baseball, I look forward to a new era of fiscal restraint and peace between the oligarchies of this great nation of ours.
Sometimes, I think I’d rather get a root canal than buy a car. Jebus I hate those fucking dealers.
Of course, I’m unemployed and don’t have any money anyway, so I guess I’m lucky after all!!!
Hey, the guy’s already had a job that only a congenital liar can be successful at, so he’d be perfect as a Republican Congressman.
The part I like is where Krushchev bangs the heel of his shoe on the podium, at the Kremlin in Detroit, and says “We will bury your dealership!”
Ha, he’s running for office because he knows we’ll soon have $5 a gallon gas and he couldn’t give those Chevys away!
How does he feel about the PUMA the Clown Car?
Do they only have Italian politicians in NW Ohio?
I can put you in a 1977 Vega today!
Exempting auto dealers from regulation will almost certainly work. They are much more ethical than bankers. Plus, if the dealers get a little shaky, they can always bundle packages of loans and sell them on the open market…. What could go wrong?
I’ll bet Renacci always made his customers buy the Trucoat.
Get me a bundled CDO of Toxic Sub-Prime Hummer Loans and I’ll bet against it in a second!
I’ve heard that one draw back to owning a car dealership is waking to large wads of cash protruding from your ass. Life can be tough for some.
[re=584528]Crankenstank[/re]: He’s gonna steal a car franchise from C’Addle?
Josh, when I read “Speaker of the House Boehner” I cried bright orange tears. He’s a Nazi right?
[re=584540]dr.giraud[/re]: This Trucoat, it’s install at the factory.
let’s be clear: There’s only one Bob Rohrrrrrrrman!
What a conundrum for the electorate – the car salesman, or the lawyer?….car salesman, lawyer…..the horns of a dilemma don’t get any hornier than that.
Who woulda thunk a lying scumbag of a car dealer would be a Republican? You could knock me over with a feather!
He could use the same production crew that makes the car dealership ads to make his campaign ads. Capital gains cut and a five year warranty on the finish! We’re dealin’!
Speaking as someone involved in the car business on the wholesale end (and one of literally tens of liberals in the business, nationwide), the dudes who work in new car dealerships are necktied trash. Even in a city as bitterly racially divided as Memphis, these guys are comically racist, go through life drunk and tweaking, and are just generally the biggest douchebags you could care to imagine.
Unfortunately for my moral position in the world, I happen to make decent money buying cars from these fuckers that they paid like five dollars for at trade-in, and selling them to used-car dealerships so they can sell them at a three or four thousand dollar profit at retail. I’m a middleman between assholes.
Renacci? Boccieri? Take the cannoli, leave the gun.
Thundercougarfalconbird.
I had a former colleague who retired with a boat load of money. He wanted to put the money to good work, so he decided to buy his son, who was a sales manager at an auto dealership, his very own car dealership. What dealership did he buy? A GM dealership. Where did he buy it? Ohio. When did he buy it? 2005. Even great acts of love can be victims of bad timing.
“Chevy Malibu-backed collateralized debt obligations”
Great news. Bushels of gold-backed Ameros for everyone.
“Renacci ,,, still owns a medical supply business and a nursing home“
Hey, Rennach, how’s mom doing?
[re=584553]Zadig[/re]: Then your moral balance sheet is clear of any stains, so no worries! Don’t ask what I do for a living.
[re=584553]Zadig[/re]: You’re the taint on a conjoined twin?
alt tex win
Vote for me so I can introduce bills that will financially benefit my business. Oh, and I fully support our troops and will fight to create jobs and lower taxes and stuff too.
[re=584530]proudgrampa[/re]: Oh, but you don’t know the sweet, sweet pain of buying a car as a single woman! Good times for the little ladies.
Someday he will be Rick Santelli’s chauffeur.
Even insurance salesmen look down their noses at car dealers.
Boccieri, Renacci ….
This is good news for the local Olive Gardens.
[re=584530]proudgrampa[/re]: Next month will mark my 20th car-less year. Sure, that makes me completely un-American, but on the other hand, I still have a Real ‘Murican style carbon footprint larger than Sasquatch due to all the overseas flights I’m able to take with the money I’ve saved from not having a car.
Car dealerships were once thought the perfect vehicle, you should pardon the expresh, for laundering Mob money. When the federal Other Hoovers Suck, Too brigade finally caught on, there were scads of Italian American-owned dealers near Cleveland and Chicago — though the Italian Americans on the business license were not usually the Italian Americans who owned the biz, and purchases of the dealerships tended to be financed by respected old Wall Street institutions like the Central States Teamsters Pension Fund led by the unfortunately assassinated Allan Dorfman. So don’t say that new car dealers aren’t good fellas…
“Renacci…still owns a medical supply business and a nursing home…”
Well thank god. Otherwise he’d have to depend on something not subsidized buy the gubmint. He’s an aMerkun capitalist to the bone.
Car dealers and their salesscum are really some of the worst coked-up trash around…makes them a perfect fit for the Repugnant Party.
[re=584549]NJB[/re]: Not a lawyer. Boccieri is a former Air Force officer, who spent his career defending our U.S. 0f A. so that Cantonese whiners like Renacci could emjoy the fruits of Das Kapitalist system unfettered by islamo-socialism … as Rand Paul would want it.
[re=584553]Zadig[/re]: They must be thrilled to be selling union-manufactured products under a government subsidy then — of course it’s been that way for a long time, but now it’s more apparent and they can complain a little more freely. Check out the comments to the cars.com article linked above for some fun, too — damn those liberals for jump-starting the (allegedly) free market.
[re=584581]GOPCrusher[/re]: Hey now…easy there – I’m an insurance agent. But yeah, we do. You know who’s worse though? Friggin’ mortgage people!
[re=584536]Troubledog[/re]: No. They only have EYE-talian politicians.
[re=584555]Baldar T Flagass[/re]: [re=584583]El Pinche[/re]: Mmm, TruckGnocciez®…
[re=584602]Extemporanus[/re]: Somehow, my moran-ifying of the word “gnocchi” did not go as planned — it looks Eastern European or Tolkienian or something.
Now, where th’ hell did I leave that fucking jug of grappa?..
“What’s it gonna take to get you into this car…today.”
A promise that it will be running in the morning????????
I must say, I love how those salesman try to make you think they are doing you a favor when you deal with them. Mom, 80, had them muzzle one of the creeps when she came back to pick up her car saying “I don’t want to see his face”. (Yes, it is a Mercury Marquis.)
[re=584536]Troubledog[/re]: It’s-a-nice-a-place.
[re=584551]Adversary153[/re]: Apparently car dealers are in fact overwhelmingly Republicans:
http://www.fivethirtyeight.com/2009/05/news-flash-car-dealers-are-republicans.html
[re=584596]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Got a Teabagger in my office to this day still pushes the meme that Cash For Clunkers did nothing for the economy except take perfectly good used cars off the market. There were no jobs saved by Cash For Clunkers. The automakers did not stay open because of Cash For Clunkers. In his little world, people that had money that were going to buy cars anyway, bought cars. And their cars were taken off the market and forced the price of used cars up for people that needed them.
I guess denial isn’t just a river in Egypt.
[re=584536]Troubledog[/re]: Actually, as now corrected in the post, Ohio-16 is in northeast Ohio (around Canton) where there are plenty of Eyetalian and other vowel-ending Americans.
The good farmers living in my old home court in Northwest Ohio’s 5th District, on the other hand, would not elect a guy with a vowel at the end of his name if he were the last honest car dealer on earth.
They’d much elect someone with a Germanic-sounding name — like “Fruhlinger.”
[re=584558]thehelveticascenario[/re]: No dog food for Victor tonight!
Vote For Me, he says, so we can continue these hugely successful Oil Wars cause God Knows those Chevy Volts are not going to work for 50 years.
[re=584651]McDuff[/re]: “They’d much elect someone with a Germanic-sounding name — like “Fruhlinger.”
–
Isn’t this where the horse nays??? Oh, wait.
[re=584553]Zadig[/re]: I want to be morally stressed, too! Are you hiring?
[re=584593]S.Luggo[/re]: Thank you for the clarification. I jumped to a conclusion since almost everyone aspiring to gummint office is a lawyer or some other species of malefactor – except Rand Paul who steals from the blind – which is at least novel.
[re=584596]SayItWithWookies[/re]: I don’t even need to look, I hear this shit every day. The assorted stimulus checks, tax refund checks, and Cash for Clunkers were fucking godsends for this industry, all the way around. And you will never, ever, EVER hear a car dealer say kind word #1 about them. The mental disconnect in this entire industry is insane.
See, now this is only good journalism. For it to be excellent journalism — the kind that would please the SC bloggers, for example — you would need either to
a) Explain how this yahoo believes that screeching and throwing feces is going to restore solvency to General Motors and restore poor decision making to them so that they will go back to having too many dealerships per unit sold
or
b) Explain how he will “Take our Country BAcK!1!” from Them
or
c) How this man will get ABC Television to show “V” at a time more acceptable to the Wingnuttery, who are convinced that it’s all about Barack Obama.
He shudda focused on selling cars not his dealership entitlement. GM based its keep/cut decision on gross sales.
[re=584617]JMP[/re]:
Car dealers are overwhelmingly assholes also, so yes, that makes sense.
Bring back the El Camino. 2 million Mexican immigrants can’t be wrong.
[re=584651]McDuff[/re]: They’d much elect someone with a Germanic-sounding name — like “Fruhlinger.”
Ha ha, jokes on them! They’d have elected a rascally Hebrew!
Last time we bought a Chevy, we were at the dealer from 11:00 am to 3:00 pm with them trying to sell us all sorts of crap we did not want. So the next car was a lease from a different maker, looked online, picked it out, set an appointment. Thought it would be a breeze. WRONGO! Waited 2 hours for the guy…(every half hour it would only be 15 more mins). While waiting we were offered “lunch” which was carry-outs from a local restaurant in foil pans set-up on tables in the service bay! I shudder to think we will need to turn in that leased car this year and what will happen when we get there.
[re=584651]McDuff[/re]: I lived in Ohio’s fifth district during my college years and shortly thereafter and you speak the truth. Signed, Suspicious Person with Vowel-Ending Surname.
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