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If you are massive loser, you may not be aware of the hottest new Internet sensation, DEEPWATER HORIZON RESPONSE: THE OFFICIAL SITE OF THE DEEPWATER HORIZON UNIFIED COMMAND, maintained by the DEEPWATER HORIZON INCIDENT JOINT INFORMATION CENTER (JIC), which is also on the Twitter (ha ha: “What is happening to oil, someone asks — 34 minutes ago via TweetDeck”). The JIC is the collaborative effort of the various failed federal agencies and corporations who want you to know that they care. Here is a nice, fluffy press release showing America that the caring JIC will wash the oil off of all those cute (living) birds down there, like this pelican. Heroes, all! What advanced chemical agents are they using to rid this pelican of the horrible, horrible crude oil it has been covered in and drinking all the time?

Click for super-big size:

Ahh, just some Dawn dish soap, applied by multicolored children’s toothbrushes. Huh. You’d think the DEEPWATER HORIZON UNIFIED COMMAND could pony up and buy a basic GE dishwasher to clean all these pelicans, what, four, five at a time?

[Deepwater Horizon JIC]
US Navy photo

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