TERRIBLE NEWS  1:28 pm May 11, 2010

George Rekers Resigns From Gay Therapy Thing

by Jim Newell

NARTHdGreat American Wingnut Dr. George Rekers, who recently purchased a gay human from Rentboy.com to carry his luggage, give him massages, and furiously finger his anus all the time, has resigned from the board of NARTH, “the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality.” It probably has to do with the fact that he likes young, professionally gay men to stroke his cock and finger his asshole constantly, in Europe, the gayest place on Earth.

[NARTH vice president of operations David] Pruden also denied a report in the Miami New Times that NARTH had been involved in helping Rekers respond to the media.

“NARTH has never had any role in advising Dr. Rekers except to suggest that if he is innocent he needs to get a good lawyer,” Pruden said in an email. “He has friends who are members of NARTH and they are free to talk with, advise, and needless to say, they are free to help him in any way they might select.”

“NARTH as an organization has taken no official role in this other than asking him to explain to us what has happened and in accepting his resignation,” he said.

So they asked him to explain what happened, and then accepted his resignation. BUT THAT’S ALL. Well, that conversation sounds like it went well. Then again, what do we know? We’re just a blog, and the word NARTH sounds kinda funny.

[TPM Muckraker]

 
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{ 81 comments }

ManchuCandidate May 11, 2010 at 1:32 pm

I’m sad that Pinky the Mouse was a homophobe.

slappypaddy May 11, 2010 at 1:32 pm

problems everywhere these days with the self of steam.

Way Cool Larry May 11, 2010 at 1:32 pm

But I thought Rekers was all about researching gay people– especially their naughty bits!

Buttery1000 May 11, 2010 at 1:33 pm

It sounds like he got NARTH’d. Yeah, I went for the obvious.

V572625694 May 11, 2010 at 1:33 pm

NARTHing to see here, move along, problem solved, QED.

Hahaha, you wish! Therapy of homosexuality…that’s so funny!

slappypaddy May 11, 2010 at 1:33 pm

“NARTH has never had any role in advising Dr. Rekers except to suggest that if he is innocent he needs to get a good lawyer.”

if he’s guilty, he needs to get an even better lawyer.

NJB May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

NARTH clearly has no sense of humor. They too lack self of steam.

SmutBoffin May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

“NARTH has never had any role in advising Dr. Rekers except to suggest that if he is innocent he needs to get a good lawyer,”

Why does he need a lawyer? It’s not illegal to be gay.* (Despite the fervent wishes of your organization…)

Clancy_Pants May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

Don’t worry Georgie boy! We got your back.

give us a bob May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

NARTH Vader finally turns against his master.

gjdodger May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

“Innocent”? Of what? Has someone charged him with the felony of gayness or something? Anyway, I’m writing my new C. S. Lewis parody, “The Anals of NARTHia.”

CrunchyKnee May 11, 2010 at 1:34 pm

NARTH Vader was so gay.

Jumping Jim May 11, 2010 at 1:35 pm

The mustache should have given him away. Looks like the Construction Worker in the Village People.

bakeneko May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

NAMBLA was already taken.

magic titty May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

Why would they name their organization after a Pinky and the Brain comedy bit?

Extemporanus May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

“A long stroke ago, in a country far far away…”

NARTH VADER: “I am your father.”
LUCIEN: “No. No. That’s not true! That’s impossible!”
NARTH VADER: “Search your contract, you know it to be true!”
LUKE: “No! NOOOOO!!!”

Scarab May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

“.. and those who can’t, teach.”

chascates May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

“…if he’s guilty he needs to get a bad lawyer…” When will Michael Savage interview Rekers on his radio show?

Extemporanus May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

“A long stroke ago, in a country far far away…”

NARTH VADER: “I am your father.”
LUCIEN: “No. No. That’s not true! That’s impossible!”
NARTH VADER: “Search your contract, you know it to be true!”
LUCIEN: “No! NOOOOO!!!”

Adversary153 May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm

Now why would he need a good lawyer? He already hired somebody to screww him!

freakishlystrong May 11, 2010 at 1:39 pm

GARTH: Gay Assholes Rightwing Tards to Heaven.

Lazy Media May 11, 2010 at 1:41 pm

The National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality (NAMBLA).

I think they meant he needs a good sue-New-Times’-ass-off libel lawyer, not a defense lawyer.

I Heart Accuracy May 11, 2010 at 1:41 pm

That stache says bear potential. Welcome to your new life, Doctor of Hugs.

Extemporanus May 11, 2010 at 1:41 pm

[re=574678]Extemporanus[/re]: [re=574681]Extemporanus[/re]: The Force is not with me, ever.

Can O Whoopass May 11, 2010 at 1:42 pm

But, but, … does he trim his fingernails before attending RNC meets in Jeb’s Flarduh?

Clancy_Pants May 11, 2010 at 1:42 pm

The NARTH is above the Mason-Dixon line and includes all things and people deviatin’ from our normal Suth’n ways.

crapshooter102 May 11, 2010 at 1:44 pm

(NARTH)-National Assholes for Republican Therapeutic Homosexuality (NARTH)

V572625694 May 11, 2010 at 1:49 pm

[re=574696]crapshooter102[/re]: How does that work on hemorrhoids?

the problem child May 11, 2010 at 1:50 pm

What a Pruden! All poor Rekers did was pick a traveling companion who was photogenic.

obfuscator May 11, 2010 at 1:51 pm

george, you might have thought you were safely in the closet(said closet being a walk-in filled with cedar hangers, sassy pumps and a gently used pleasure swing), but your mustache makes your homosexuality visible from outer space, brah.

lizzieborden May 11, 2010 at 1:52 pm

[re=574675]bakeneko[/re]: I was just thinking “Am I the only person who thinks NAMBLA when I see NARTH?”

JMP May 11, 2010 at 1:52 pm

So, does anyone want to start a pool on how long it takes until NARTH VP David Puden is caught with his own rentboy?

[re=574665]SmutBoffin[/re]: Maybe in Republican wishful-thinking land, Lawrence v Texas was never decided. Now, the hiring of a rentboy probably does violate certain Florida statutes; but I haven’t heard of any move to prosecute the guy.

Crank Tango May 11, 2010 at 1:53 pm

[re=574681]Extemporanus[/re]: Yes Lucien, you know it’s true, now stroke my dark side.

user-of-owls May 11, 2010 at 1:54 pm

[re=574691]Extemporanus[/re]: Why don’t you try some html formatting. That will make you feel better.

Carrie_Okie May 11, 2010 at 1:54 pm

“That’s ALL that happened. After he resigned we kept ourselves clothed. I swear…”

SayItWithWookies May 11, 2010 at 1:54 pm

So is NARTH going to change its name to NATH, or are there other Christians in the organization diligently doing — um — research?

user-of-owls May 11, 2010 at 1:54 pm

Ha ha! When I read this, I laughed so hard I nearly NARTHed!

Joshua Norton May 11, 2010 at 1:56 pm

IMHO, what ever he paid those dudes to “rub” him wasn’t even close to being enough money.

Ninong May 11, 2010 at 1:56 pm

He was only doing “research” for a book he was writing.

WriteyWriterton May 11, 2010 at 1:57 pm

“[NARTH vice president of operations David] Pruden…” Operations? Is that how they do the therapy thing? Harsh.

And did he have to change his name to Pruden to get the job with NARTH? Isn’t that a bit obvious, or is it just an obvious bit?

Bearbloke May 11, 2010 at 1:59 pm

But will Rekers sign my copy of his bloody HI-larious book?

disgustedcitizen May 11, 2010 at 2:02 pm

I would guess that just about every other swinging dick in NARTH is as gay as Rekers, they just haven’t admitted it yet.

JMP May 11, 2010 at 2:02 pm

[re=574676]magic titty[/re]: “What are we going to do tonight, George?”

“They same thing we do every night, David – hire some hot young rentboys to stroke us off!

Long Form Def Certificate May 11, 2010 at 2:04 pm

This is just like when Kramer got fired.

Extemporanus May 11, 2010 at 2:05 pm

[re=574710]Crank Tango[/re]: “I find your lack of ‘Faith’ by George Michael disturbing.”

[re=574713]user-of-owls[/re]: I have HTML formatting problems on one or two posts over the last six months — both of which involved Michael Steel, by the way (hmmm…) — and you make it sound like I’m the Jar-Jar Twinks of commenting, or something.

gurukalehuru May 11, 2010 at 2:12 pm

Only 50% of all gay men were born with that inclination. The other half were just sucked into it.

Capitol Hillbilly May 11, 2010 at 2:14 pm

The state of Fla. was paying him $300 an hour for his insights into the devious ways of homos.

http://www.tampabay.com/news/politics/stateroundup/mccollum-requested-antigay-expert-now-embroiled-in-rentboy-scandal/1094157

the problem child May 11, 2010 at 2:15 pm

Do you think Rekers and Pruden broke up over Rekers’ cheating ways?

sezme May 11, 2010 at 2:19 pm

[re=574729]Bearbloke[/re]: How can any single aspect of this whole saga not be some sort of elaborate parody?

Not_So_Much May 11, 2010 at 2:21 pm

[re=574729]Bearbloke[/re]: Wow — you’d think the NAMBLA-themed cover of his book would have been a bit of a tip-off.

Autochthon May 11, 2010 at 2:24 pm

[re=574757]Capitol Hillbilly[/re]: Practice makes pervert…

sezme May 11, 2010 at 2:24 pm

[re=574776]Not_So_Much[/re]: Yeah, it’s like a somehow even creepier version of Julie’s Sixteenth Birthday.

gurukalehuru May 11, 2010 at 2:25 pm

He got kicked out of the Narth, but he’s still welcome down south, honey chile.

Jukesgrrl May 11, 2010 at 2:30 pm

“They asked him to explain what happened, and then accepted his resignation.”

Awww, and he wanted to be spanked so bad.

What Fresh Hell is This? May 11, 2010 at 2:36 pm

Forbearance in the face of fate, beauty constant under torture, are not merely passive. They are a positive achievement, an explicit triumph.
— Thomas Mann (Death in Venice)

AKAM80TheWolf May 11, 2010 at 2:37 pm

[re=574729]Bearbloke[/re]:

“… and Flannel Daddy bade Junior prepare himself without delay and took him one side”

That’ll definitely ‘shape’ something.

Pilate May 11, 2010 at 2:44 pm

[re=574793]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Fiscal discipline!

ms_mcgee May 11, 2010 at 3:13 pm

[re=574757]Capitol Hillbilly[/re]: “Our attorneys handling this case have searched long and hard for other expert witnesses…,” McCollum wrote. Long and hard – isn’t that the Rentboy slogan?

user-of-owls May 11, 2010 at 3:19 pm

[re=574741]Extemporanus[/re]: Oh, come on now. I was only kiding my friend!

Snidely May 11, 2010 at 3:20 pm

[re=574757]Capitol Hillbilly[/re]: The state does pay a premium for first-hand experience.

Gunner May 11, 2010 at 3:43 pm

“He has friends who are members of NARTH and . . . they are free to help him in any way they might select.”

Like say a soothing “long stroke”?

Mr Blifil May 11, 2010 at 3:52 pm

Savor the ladyboyjuice.

crapshooter102 May 11, 2010 at 4:16 pm

Not very well, especially on a dry run.

PlanetWingnuta May 11, 2010 at 4:38 pm

FINGER BANG FINGER BANG….I’M GONNA FINGER BANG YOU INTO MY LIFE !

PlanetWingnuta May 11, 2010 at 4:40 pm

Since he’s all fired and stuff…will he be at this year’s Folsom out and proud?

Dolmance May 11, 2010 at 4:44 pm

This is even more disgusting than Wonkette’s blow by blow account from the guy who porked Orly Taitz, describing her as “tighter and wetter,” than girls half her age. I truly appreciate Wonkette for giving me a real sense of what it’s like to have sex with notable Republicans. Any chance you could get a scoop on what’s it like to eat out Kathryn Lopez?

Thanks, I appreciate it.

What? No! May 11, 2010 at 4:52 pm

[re=574718]user-of-owls[/re]: I laughed so hard I had milk coming out of my NARTH.

stew May 11, 2010 at 5:12 pm

[re=575080]Dolmance[/re]: There went lunch!

PlanetWingnuta May 11, 2010 at 5:13 pm

[re=575080]Dolmance[/re]: it’s like a cow eating grass. it’s like a teabagger eating a krispy kreme doughnut, its like…hell i dont know how it is i dont eat vagina esp one of K-LO variety…YOU THINK I HAVE LOW SELF OF STEAM OR SOMETHING!!!!

pat robertsons personal trainer May 11, 2010 at 5:17 pm

[re=574689]Lazy Media[/re]: the only good lawyer he’d need is anthony kennedy (who’s not that great a lawyer) and he only needs kennedy if scalia, roberts, alito, and clancy were willing to rewrite a wholebuncha libel law because reporting some closet case homophobe hired a gay dude to carry his bags around gay ol’ you-rope ain’t actual malice…and truth is always a defense.

thefrontpage May 11, 2010 at 6:12 pm

You should see the pictures and videos at RentNARTH.com!

thefrontpage May 11, 2010 at 6:13 pm

Variety is reporting that George Akers has been signed on as the lead in Lifetime’s “The Larry Craig Story.”

thefrontpage May 11, 2010 at 6:15 pm

Look for Lucien to be the most popular baby name in 2010.

OldGrowthSwamp May 11, 2010 at 7:03 pm

Shredsville over at Amazon.com under George Rekers. Wow.

NYNYNY May 11, 2010 at 7:05 pm

If he’s innocent, get a good lawyer. I guess if now he gets charged with soliciting? Or if has a past with 16yr olds??

They then suggested if he’s guilty, to get a lawyer from rentboy.com, cause hey, WTF. At least you have somebody to finger during the long boring trial.

One Flew Over the Wingnut May 11, 2010 at 7:34 pm

He was also asked to resign as the cowardly lion and from the council of narnia for making the beavers give him hand jobs…it was a bad week for Rekers. He was also kicked out of the “Brent Bozell” look-alike club for only getting a handjob. Everyone who’s anyone in the homersexual conservative underground, or as we call them the religious right knows to really be a brent bozell look-alike one must also give a reach around and be snorkled.

new complexnegro May 11, 2010 at 8:50 pm

Now come on, he was just exercising his meat muscles.

Dolmance May 11, 2010 at 9:55 pm

I feel strongly in my heart of hearts that Glenn Beck has sucked more than a few cocks in his life. Maybe Wonkette could open up that famous vault of treasure tucked away in their corporate headquarters building and put up a reward for someone to come clean and just admit it, and discuss it at length.

Also, has anyone had sex with Bill Kristol who would be interested in talking about it publicly? I’m thinking there’s a book in this somewhere, with a chapter devoted to a blow by blow account of one Republican after another having sex. This would be a must have book, for all those political junkies out there interested in something unusual.

PsycGirl May 11, 2010 at 10:25 pm

[re=575080]Dolmance[/re]: By judicious use of this and similar comments, I could cut our monthly food bill by 25% for a family of four.

sanantonerose May 12, 2010 at 12:59 am

When I see George’s face, I hear the song “Tainted Love” by Soft Cell.

crapistani May 12, 2010 at 1:01 am

[re=575080]Dolmance[/re]: The thought of food or sex now fill me with nausea, probably permanently.

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